Bags

GoPlug Powered Bags

$129 - $399 Kickstarter »

I kind of like the idea of sitting on a park bench with a backpack sporting an electrical outlet. Typing away on a laptop plugged into something that once carried books, but now carries a 115v, 60Hz device capable of...

Combat Daddy Equipment Diaper Bag

Sold Out Amazon »

The Combat Daddy Equipment diaper bag: no Skoda Man Pram is complete without one. Combat Daddy Equipment's Model 1 carry-all for fathers who drew the short straw and have to take their kids to the park...or stay at home...

TARDIS Backpack

Discontinued

Imagine how much stuff you could cram inside a TARDIS backpack. A laptop, a tablet, and an entire XBox. Enough gear and clothing for a 2-week backpacking trip through Nepal. At least 4 cases of beer plus, like, 20 pounds...

Pelican Crushproof Backpacks

$75 - $350 Amazon »

Defense wins games. (Right, Peyton?) Defensive driving prevents accidents. Proof of self-defense averts jail time. And a Pelican crushproof barrier defending your laptop against fat Aunt Jan tripping over a strap of the...

Pleasure Products Organizer

$29 - $69 Kickstarter »

This one's for the ladies. I think. It's hard to keep track of who likes what anymore...

Pug Bag

$38.90 Etsy »

Obviously all women who carry a pug bag are certifiably crazy, but I think it should also be a rule of logic that all certifiably crazy women carry a pug bag. You know, as demarcation. So that we're fairly warned before...

Sizzle Strapz Leather Bags

$249 - $1,499 Etsy »

Rich Bhata hand smiths all Sizzle Strapz bags in his St. Charles, IL shop from genuine cow hide and American buffalo. I've never felt the desire to lovingly stroke a cow or buffalo before--just devour them in ground and...

The Beast Duffel Bag

Sold Out Amazon »

What makes a duffel bag a beast? Bigness. Ruggedness. Resilience. What makes a duffel bag The Beast? According to Saddleback Leather, all of the above, plus a 100-year warranty (yes, that's one hundred), a mere 3 seams...

Bloody Cleaver Purse

Discontinued

Ladies, I dare anyone to try to rip you off or cut up your credit cards or even look at you in a way you do not find pleasing when you're carrying one of these babies. From the butcher's block to the sewing machine, nothing...

Defender Anti-Theft Backpack

Due to my hulking presence and penetrating stare, people usually know better than to try and steal...or touch...or come within 10 feet of my stuff. But I'll grant that theft, and pickpocketing in particular, is a worldwide...

Cocoon Go Go Gadget Pack

$79.99 Cocoon »

Geez, here's a backpack that has as many fancy names associated with it as it does fancy pockets for holding gadgets. Organization brand Cocoon (that's #1) has released its SLIM (#2) tech backpack with MacBook Pro (#3)...

Henty Wingman Suit Commuter Bag

Sold Out Amazon »

This Goose protects suits from wrinkles and creases, totes tablets, and staves off the rain. Provided you don't fall off your bike or back into something while walking and kill him too. The Henty Wingman, a heavy-duty...

Grenade Coin Pouch

Discontinued

I knew with a little help from the Internet it wouldn't take long to find an answer to my question of what am I going to do with all of the grenades I stockpiled in anticipation of the end of the world that did not happen...

Washing Machine Suitcase

$152 PrezzyBox »

At first I thought this was an actual washing machine/suitcase combo. Like for moms to tote around and use to instantly remove the spit-up and dirt and, in my case, Bloody Marys, from their kids' perpetually soiled clothes...

Cartoon Bags

Discontinued

Nope, they're not drawings, they're not Photoshopped, and they don't exist only in the realms of Cool World and Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Cartoon Bags, by JumpFromPaper's dynamically creative, Taipei-based designers Chay...

Zombie Survival Kit Messenger Bag

$39.95 NeatoShop.com »

While I'll probably just use my Zombie Survival Kit Messenger Bag to carry, like, books and Funyuns, I'm hoping that when the actual Zombie Apocalypse hits, nests of walking dead that are considering chasing me down to...

Basketball Backpack

$24.95 NeatoShop.com »

Much to the agony of the kids who have to go back and the ecstasy of the parents who get to send them, it's time to start thinking about school. Painful for young'uns in every way, less their opportunity to rake in a...

Vintage Style Medic Messenger Bag

$21.99 Amazon »

These messenger bags are really getting out of hand. Do guys really have that much crap to carry around? I guess if you're a guy who has to carry around his sketch pad or idea book and an apple or some shit all day, this...