Gear

VZ Executive Dagger

$85 - $110 from Amazon »

The VZ Executive Dagger pokes - stabs, thrusts, drives - through the custom gun grips populating the rest of the VZ Grips store to show off its own fine craftsmanship and beauty as a survival tool and weapon of self defense...

Artiphon Orba Musical Instrument

$100 from MoMA »

Orba looper doompety doo / I've got a handheld soundbox for you / Orba MIDI doompety dee / Tap to make music immediately. Couldn't quite fit synthesizer in there, but the Artiphon Orba Musical Instrument is that too -...

CoolDrift Versa - Cooling Headband for Better Sleep

$349 from Amazon »

Got a hot head? The CoolDrift Versa wearable is here to give you a lobotomy and calm those steaming thoughts down. Er, wait, no. The CoolDrift Versa wearable is here to adjust and maintain your optimal body temperature...

Bloody Zombie Door Decal

$6.95 from Amazon »

The Bloody Zombie Door Decal is a "scary Halloween decoration" that, I must admit, is a pretty damn scary Halloween decoration. Like, if I were a meal or grocery delivery driver, I might refuse the dropoff to a house...

5' Inflatable Flying LED Dragon

$49.95 from Amazon »

I know this 5' inflatable flying LED dragon is out now as a Halloween decoration, but, I mean, I'd hang one in my office for all year long. He's so fierce and handsome. He'd provide a really nice point of interest and...

Kung Fu Double Whips

$166 from Amazon »

Presumably, everybody has gotten their fill of Kung Fu Fighting. So how about for the next song we try our hands at some Kung Fu Double Whipping?...

DIY Halloween Candy Slide

Spooky skeletons practice social distancing too, kids! This DIY Halloween Candy Slide from Wicked Makers isn't just a COVID-friendly addition to safe trick-or-treating in 2020, it's a charming and fun way to deliver Fun...

Steno SR Pro-1 Pocket Sized Sound Booth

$259 from Amazon »

See that dude with his mouth against the Steno SR Pro-1? He's using the pocket-sized sound booth to blow out a stirring cover of Miley Cyrus' "Midnight Sky" on the bus to work. And thanks to the device's 100% noise cancellation...

ICEY - No Ice, No Blender Homemade Frozen Drinks

$39 - $55 from Kickstarter »

I know frozen drink season is about over, but ICEY wants you to plan for next summer with their new no ice, no blender (and allegedly no mess) homemade frozen drink cup crowdfunding campaign. Those who pledge for the...

WaterPrepared Emergency Water Storage Tank

$497 - $827 from Amazon »

Lotta bottles of Dasani it's gonna take to fill one of WaterPrepared's 160-gallon Emergency Water Storage Tanks. And don't even get me started on how many grocery store shelves I'll have to clear out if my mama decides...

SubSafe Sub Sandwich Container

$24.99 from Amazon »

Think of the SubSafe sub sandwich container - or hoagie, grinder, hero, po' boy, whatever your regional dialect dictates container - as a sammy condom. It encapsulates your lunch so you can stick it in a bag or cooler...

Top It Germ-Thwarting Cake Shield

$4.99 - $14.99 from Top It Cake Shield »

Seems like the Top It Cake Shield and I have differing opinions on the perfect slice of birthday cake. See, I believe no slice of birthday cake is complete without a spit shower of sprinkles on top, delivered, of course...

M48 Cyclone Spear

$105.99 from Amazon »

If United Cutlery learned anything from their M48 Cyclone fixed blade knife it's that bigger isn't always better...but it looks pretty damn cool when extended to lengths any serious zombie slayer might covet. Behold the...

U Stink Skunk Last Place Trophy

$14.99 from Amazon »

When even a skunk says, "U stink!" you know you're a loser. But don't worry, there's a trophy for that. A Last Place Trophy with a special spot for custom engraving your name, or the thing you suck more at than everyone...

Basketball Bottle Opener with Cap Collector Net

$22.99 from Amazon »

As strange as it may be for basketball fans to be watching the NBA playoffs heading into fall, using a Basketball Bottle Opener to crack open the beers they'll enjoy while doing so - plus catch the bottle caps in a sealed-off...

Privise USB Data Blocker

$14.90 from Amazon »

Malware, viruses, automatic data transfer, can I get some Privise here, please? The Privise USB Data Blocker serves as a middleman - no, more than a middleman, a veritable Gandalf! - between your phone or other portable...

Glow Rhino Tritium EDC Gear

$39.99 - $49.99 from Glow Rhino »

Sure, Glow Rhino's tritium-studded tools will add some swagger to your EDC. But when things go dark, and the self-powered light source kicks in to glow neon bright as a beacon to your keys, your beer cap, your roaming...

Office Possum

$22.50 from Archie McPhee »

Waka, waka, waka, it's the old possum in the office trash can surprise! You know, the classic Office Possum prank. The practical joke of the...yeah, OK, the practical joke of the nothing. Hiding a possum in your co-worker's...

Keter Go Bar - Portable Cooler with Pop-Up Table

$39.99 from Amazon »

A cooler that doubles as a table. A table that doubles as a cooler. Sounds like a keeper - or rather, a Keter - to me. The Keter Go Bar is a portable cooler with a pop-up table lid, a new beach-, picnic-, and rooftop-friendly...

AboveTEK Portable & Retractable Laptop Lap Desk

$31.99 from Amazon »

The AboveTEK Laptop Desk has your awkward WFH situation, your right- and left-handedness, and your laptop churning at 120 degrees covered. In other words, the AboveTEK Laptop Desk has got your back lap...

DriveSlide Hard Drive & Laptop Accessory Holder

$20 - $25 from Kickstarter »

The DriveSlide laptop-mounted holder for hard drives and other accessories is another elegantly simple solution to a problem. Granted, it's a problem not all of us have, but for those who compute on the go, or use a laptop...

Disaster Deck Pocket-Sized Emergency Survival Cards

$12.99 from Amazon »

Ah, I wish a simple card trick could solve the disasters of 2020, but I think the Disaster Deck is in over its head here. The pocket-sized set covers everything from wildfires to hurricanes to heatwaves, but I think the...

HairMax Laser Hair Growth Band

$545 - $795 from Amazon »

I am 99% sure the HairMax Laser Hair Growth Band works for those experiencing hair loss. No wait, typo. Remove one of those 9s. Yeah, that's more like it. I am 9% sure the HairMax Laser Hair Growth Band works for those...

Clawgs - Dog Shoes That Allow Dogs to Use Their Claws

$30 - $40 from Dog Sap »

Clawgs, dog shoes - or rather dog sandals - don't surprise me in the least. For years now dog owners have thrived on making their pets look ridiculous under the guise of comfort and protection. Who remembers the Shed...