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Tuesday, April 22, 2014
$787.49 from Gyroscope.com »

One time I had to write white paper or a green paper or something about a Stirling engine for a job interview but I still didn't really understand how they work. Something about expansion and contraction of gas and...oh, wait....

Thursday, April 24, 2014
$9.95 from Amazon »

I don't know about the logistics of fitting a mug with a sippy cup top in my car's cup holder, but I do know about the logistics of being able to walk down the street drinking from my favorite ninja mug without sloshing and...

Friday, January 10, 2014
$411 from Canada Ammo »

No one has written a Wikipedia article on Dominion Arms' Grizzly 8.5 magfed shotgun yet, and no one has given me a Dominion Arms Grizzly 8.5 mag fed shotgun yet, so all I can really say about it is that from the very first time we locked eyes online, I felt that we were one. That we should roar and tear through a river together, eat raw fish and honey, and then retire to my den for a nap. That...

Thursday, March 13, 2014
$165 - $185 from Ring »

Like FIN, Ring is a wearable input device controlled by gestures and finger movement. Unlike FIN, Ring picked a name inextricably bound to JRR Tolkien and an iconic, highly complimentary line about ruling them all, so it will...

Tuesday, April 22, 2014
$13.99 from Amazon »

So, uh...you think that Obol girl in the video is 18? I mean, I'm just asking. Out of...academic curiosity. And as a way to make anti-soggy cereal bowl conversation....

Thursday, January 16, 2014
$500 - $520 from Etsy »

Quick, someone get this cat a lance! He's scheduled to joust one of the guinea pigs from G-Force at high noon and only just finished his battle armor fitting. I don't know if he's ready for this. The pigs have been training for months, and despite the obvious size advantage and unblinking eyes of a sociopath Mr. Whiskers here has, his front paw grip and equestrian abilities are still questionable...

Thursday, September 12, 2013
$34 - $45.50 from Polar Pen »

POLAR. It's a pen. It's a stylus. It's a tool. It's a toy. And it won't even F up your phone and credit cards*! The modular writing implement, made of 12 cylindrical neodymium magnets stacked over a Pilot ink cartridge, provides...

Sunday, December 1, 2013
$850 from Etsy »

I wish Saberforge would stop churning out new custom designs faster than I can squirrel away enough money from helping old ladies with groceries and skimming off the top of the church collection basket to buy them all. This...

Sunday, April 20, 2014
$69.99 from Amazon »

I like inducing things alright. Normally it's the ire of others and a wicked hangover with fine Hornitos tequila. But now I can also induce the proverbial flames of fire with Duxtop's induction cooktop. And, even better, in...

Monday, December 16, 2013
$83.79 from Amazon »

While it sounds like something Batman would be called upon to save the world from, Brunton's Hydrogen Reactor is actually an innocuous, albeit robust, deliverer of power to portable devices. It's a piece of scientific splendor...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013
$74.99 from Amazon »

Now here's something that should be illegal, but is instead available with free shipping on Amazon. The reverse peephole viewer, used appropriately by law enforcement personnel and inappropriately by 99% of all others who...

Thursday, April 3, 2014
$9.95 from Fiesta Five »

Did you know that National High Five Day is just 2 weeks away? Wait, let me back up. Did you know there exists such a thing as National High Five Day? It's the third Thursday of every April, or for our purposes, April 17...

Friday, January 3, 2014

Here's a Swiss bank safe for you to put in your living room. Or your back yard. Your secret catacombs? Somewhere roomy, guarded, and secure, because one thing's for sure: the vault's self-contained 1,619 safe deposit boxes...

Friday, December 13, 2013
$79.95 - $139.95 from Zombie Hammer »

"Zombie Hammer survival tools are designed to last longer than cockroaches." Longer than cockroaches! Now that's a sell. This knuckle dustered cache of apocalyptic weapons must have a collective immune system of steel! Hold...

Sunday, March 30, 2014
$999 - $1,200 from Natural Machines »

I am 0% surprised that someone made a 3D food printer. If we can print jewelry and home decor and machine parts and sugar, why shouldn't we be able to print dinner? Barcelona-based company Natural Machines has created the...

Thursday, May 30, 2013
$16 - $28 from Mutator »

People seem to love their iPhones. Almost as much as they seem to love to bitch about them. Damn autocorrect, good-for-nothing maps, battery life of a gallon of mocha almond fudge in the hands of pregnant woman, innate tendency...

Sunday, December 15, 2013
$22,500 - $27,500 from TrackingPoint »

Taking top honors in the category of Yo That's Crazy and Moderately Disturbing but I Guess It Was Gonna Happen Sometime: TrackingPoint's PGF. Precision. Guided. Firearm. It's fighter-jet-style, lock-and-launch technology stuffed...

Friday, December 20, 2013
$65 - $400 from No More Woof »

From the Nordic Society of Invention and Discovery--yes, that's a real society, not one made up by Wes Anderson--comes No More Woof, a device that lifts up the latest technology in micro computing and EEG, and plops it down...

Friday, April 18, 2014
$12 - $14 from Amazon »

They call it a high performance guitar pick, which in my mind means that the Pykmax should do the guitar strumming for me. Like a player piano, but completely inconspicuously so that the ladies I'm trying to impress think...

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Five seconds into a look through Triangle Krav Maga's Website and Facebook photo stream and two things become abundantly clear: these cats do not F around; and I would like an application to become one of them. After all...

Wednesday, February 19, 2014
$3,899.99 from Airsplat »

390 FPS, 21-1/2" long barrel, 13-1/2" short barrel, 1,700-round magazine capacity...I don't think I'd even shoot my friend Cornelius in the ass with one of these things to try to get on Tosh.0. The Echo1 M134 MiniGun is an...

Wednesday, February 19, 2014
$99 - $169 from Fin »

FIN is a thumb ring. It's way less intimidating than a pinky ring, but if intimidation isn't your primary motive, FIN can do several hi-tech, gadgety things, some of which you may find even more useful than making the guy...

Sunday, March 18, 2012
$4,400 - $4,950 from Arsenal Firearms »

The AF2011-A1 Double Barrel Pistol is a first on two counts. It's the first ever double barrel semiautomatic pistol manufactured for sale (not available yet, but on deck for Fall 2012). And, after getting a load of the "Twenty...

Sunday, February 9, 2014
$349 - $449 from indiegogo »

Strong as a lion, small as a mouse. The Tango PC functions as powerfully and dynamically as a desktop at work, and then slips into your front pocket so you can head over to your friend Corenelius' house and unleash an intense...

Tuesday, December 17, 2013
$184 from Amazon »

Butterfly Labs' entry level Jalapeno Bitcoin miner sells with a mining rate of 5 G/Hash per second, as well as with an upgrade that bumps its performance to 7 G/Hash per second. And while both are pretty paltry in comparison...

Thursday, September 15, 2011
$149.99 from ThinkGeek »

NOTE: To everyone who keeps emailing us to reveal "the truth" about this product, please conserve your time and effort; trust us, we are well aware of the month and day on which ThinkGeek released their groundbreaking tattoo...

Tuesday, December 3, 2013
$7.95 from Can Stamp »

Ever since the days of colonialism and the American Frontier...no...way before that. Ever since the days animals began eking out a drop more urine even when they didn't have to pee just so that they could piss on things, we...

Wednesday, February 26, 2014
By: Armatix

Looks like James Bond and Data from The Goonies are finally making good on that collaboration they've been talking about. What we have here is a smartwatch-controlled pistol. A gun that will fire only if it is within range...

Friday, March 1, 2013
$149 from Thalmic Labs »

Well, telekinetic is only part of the story. Is telemusculokinetic a word too? Maybe that's redundant. Remote control muscles? Yeah, let's go with RC muscles. MYO armbands transform muscles--specifically the arm, or as I like...

Tuesday, February 11, 2014
$110 - $120 from Melee Mods »

Since The Walking Dead started again, I've been thinking I need a new zombie-decimating weapon for use in my daydreams about stuffing them with bullets and hacking off their heads. Melee Mods' Tact-Axe and Gatchet should do...

Monday, April 21, 2014
$67.56 from Amazon »

Yeah, MP3 speaker pillows are all fun and games until someone drowns their connected smartphone in a pool of drool and shorts it beyond repair. It's about time we got a Bluetooth upgrade to this otherwise swell advancement...

Friday, November 15, 2013
$50 - $100 from Coin »

Since I'm so important I pretty much have cards coming out of my ascending colon. Granted, most of them are for the various sandwich and froyo shops around my town (with one very special exception of a $50 gift card to Toys...

Friday, April 4, 2014
$44.99 from Big Bad Toy Store »

Big Bad Toy Store says nothing--nothing!--about its forthcoming breakfast game changer, the Darth Vader Toaster, except this:...

Thursday, January 30, 2014
$135 - $300.95 from Falcon Slingbows »

Rattlin' Randy Riffenburgh owns the dual titles of Falcon Slingbow Creator and Falcon Slingbow Sniper. He developed the patent-pending, arrow-shooting slingshot for hunting, fishing, and target shooting. And he reigns supreme...

Friday, March 28, 2014
By: CrabFu

Welcome to the world of I-Wei Huang. Artist. Animator. Tinkerer. Maker of hamster-powered Strandbeest. Strandbeest, if you aren't familiar with the term, are the walking brainchildren of Dutch artist Theo Jansen. In full glory...

Wednesday, December 11, 2013
$1,680 from Her Royal Flyness »

I am drawing this Ex-Boyfriend Revenge Kit to the world's attention only so that if anyone sees a woman carrying a bluish-greenish colored purse you'll know to report her immediately to a shrink, the police, and Batman....

Thursday, February 23, 2012
$297.15 from Amazon »

Are you prepared to fight for the survival and integrity of family, friends, and the human race in apocalyptic combat with the ambulatory dead? In other words, do you want to buy a 7-piece set of gut-ripping knives and sick...

Monday, December 24, 2012
$129.99 - $499 from Amazon »

Be advised: Although Phillip Isherwood's custom crafted lightsabers blaze LED spectral force fields of green, red, or blue and arrive with 36" long polycarbonate blades designed for full speed, full contact dueling, he wants...

Saturday, April 19, 2014
$19.99 from ThinkGeek »

Why yes, House Lannister, you can hold my Bud Light Lime, collecting its condensation and dribblings in the shallow basin of your golden lion wax seal. House Targaryen though, I'd prefer you hold my head, collecting its drool...

Sunday, August 19, 2012

"Don't leave civilization without one." It's the motto of the US Survival AR-7, a semi-automatic portable rifle that weighs a mere 3-1/2 pounds and measures in at 16-1/2" long when broken down and stowed in its waterproof...

Sunday, June 30, 2013
$1,629 from Chiappa Firearms »

I don't know how to shoot a gun, or really even how to hold a gun without soiling my pants, but I bet if someone put one gun in my hands and another to my head and demanded I use the former to fire at a watermelon dangling...

Sunday, February 24, 2013
$17.07 from Amazon »

I live for shenanigans of the PC Prankster variety. No, not because I'm devious and mean-spirited, because I have great empathy for others. I know as well as anyone how it feels to reach a level of frustration with a computer...

Saturday, November 30, 2013
$129 from Kano »

Simple as LEGO, powered by Pi. The Raspberry techie kind, not the 3.14Infinity kind. Or the fruit kind for that matter, but a DIY mini computer powered by flaky-crusted dessert might be the one element to rocket launch Kano's...

Friday, May 31, 2013
$17.90 from Amazon »

The chemical element Gallium does not exist in pure form in nature, but since it's so magical and badass looking all solid-to-liquid-at-the-touch-of-a-human-hand and all, of course man figured out a way to extract it from...

Sunday, March 2, 2014
$133.34 from Amazon »

Maybe you'd rather your 6-pack attack come from the real one--the M-32 multiple grenade launcher Mach Machowicz once demoed on Future Weapons--but you'll probably get yourself into a lot less trouble with the po and your mom...

Saturday, December 7, 2013
$17.75 from Amazon »

If you're looking for a way both to obstruct 90% of the view out of your back windshield and provide a beacon to po searching for cars to pull over, I am pleased to offer you one of AGPtek's bumpin' & grindin', sound activated...

Wednesday, March 26, 2014
$9.95 from iFixit »

What's not included in the MacGyver Toolkit? According to iFixit, nothing but the mullet. For those of you too young to remember Angus MacGyver, here is what this pocket-sized secret agent's Altoids tin will get you one step...

Saturday, April 5, 2014
$59.99 from Amazon »

Not so much emergency as in your smartphone's battery died in the middle of placing a midnight Dominoes order and you can't find your charger. More like emergency as in you've been snow camping on a mountain for 3 days and...

Thursday, February 13, 2014
$199 - $239 from Bragi »

The Dash is a set of wireless in-ear headphones. It's also a self-contained MP3 player. And a Bluetooth headset. A microphone. A USB stick. A heart rate monitor, fitness tracker, sports watch. It has the capabilities of at...

Saturday, September 3, 2011
By: Youtube

The electronic Personal Information Processor (PIP) manufactured by RobCo Industries in Fallout 3 and Fallout: New Vegas is now a viable acquisition to your non-gaming, non-digitized, biological life. Which is not only badass...

Sunday, March 16, 2014
$75 from Amazon »

I like it when the computer costs only about 2.5 times more than the keyboard they recommend to go with it. The latest in Android's line of mini PCs, the RK3188 serves as an upgrade to the platform's RK3066 model. One happy...

Monday, March 25, 2013
$99 from 4thdesign »

This Trigger iPhone 5 case looks heavy. Like I'll either develop a disproportionately muscular right arm from lifting and holding it to my ear, or I'll finally succumb to one of those GD earpieces I hate so much* because I'm...

Wednesday, February 26, 2014
$99 - $239 from mini museum »

It's not an oompa loompa, but a portable plaque of specimens ranging from a thread of circa 350 BC Egyptian mummy wrap to a sliver of T-Rex tooth is still rad enough for me to whine, "Mama! I want a Mini Museum! I want you...

Thursday, April 17, 2014
$41.30 from Amazon »

First you build the wind-powered generators. Then the wind spins the turbines. Then the turbines turn an electric generator. Then the electric generator charges some rechargeable AA batteries. And then--then!--you use those...

Tuesday, March 11, 2014
$4.99 from Amazon »

Sold as a blank, Schlage Lock Company's 45 caliber pistol key cuts to fully loaded and ready to fire up the car, blast open the front door, or shoot up the lid to the porn stash and secret cell phone your wife believes are...

Sunday, May 13, 2012
$1,850 from Etsy »

You look at the replica M41A Pulse Rifle from Aliens, its fully adjustable metal stock and removable magazine, and wonder, Is it real? It looks real. It's the right shape. It's...huge...definitely the right size. It moves...

Sunday, January 12, 2014
$9,500 from Blade HQ »

Better known as the Gargantuan Beast, Marfione Customs' HALO V 3X is a 32" out the front knife begging to battle Bigfoot and become the next addition to your Microtech collection. As indicated, the 3X is 3 times the size of...

Tuesday, March 18, 2014
$40.22 from Amazon »

I couldn't feature the time lapse video of a guy constructing this Haynes DIY internal combustion engine because the 225 bpm Looney Tunes music playing throughout his process started giving me heart palpitations after 15 seconds....

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Usually the best part about any Japanese product is the video they make to go with it. This Hanaga Tap, or nose outlet's, may not be as bizarre and exaggerated as some, but given that they make the development of a human nose...

Friday, July 26, 2013
$43 from SexShop 365 »

A heads up to politicians and city planners: stop wasting your money on bike lanes, tax incentives, and PSA campaigns. All you need do to persuade your constituents to trade in cars for bicycles on their morning commute is...

Friday, January 4, 2013
$42.99 from Amazon »

AKA The Other $35 Do-It-All Computer. Running Android 4.0, the MK802 Allwinner A10 Mini PC is about the size of a flash drive and, also like your favorite USB storage device, enjoys being plugged into things. HDMI inputs to...

Tuesday, April 15, 2014
$1.67 from Amazon »

I don't really like smug car decals like this because I think anyone who needs to be sorry for driving sooo close in front of me should be plucked from the road and tossed into a tar pit by the hand of God. However, I accept...

Wednesday, January 8, 2014
$99 from AIRTAME »

AIRTAME believes that "everyone should be able to show any content from any computer on any screen--wirelessly." Given that last time I tried to hook up my laptop to my friend Cornelius' TV to show him a slideshow from my...

Monday, May 27, 2013
$349.99 from Tactical Tech Zone »

Stealth. Stamina. Sniper sight. And that's just the M4 Tactical Crossbow itself. Like, before taking into account the litany of powerful, valiant, not-to-be-F'd-with characteristics Cornelius and I will bring to the table...

Sunday, November 3, 2013
$17.25 from Amazon »

Combining the ethos that nothing is scarier than one's own imagination with the ethos that creeping someone out to the cusp of a complete mental breakdown is great fun, we have...The Eviltron. That strange scratching sound...

Tuesday, January 14, 2014
$12 from Shapeways »

I mean, I'm fine getting my own glass of SunnyD, but I guess if you really want to give me some of yours, alright. Go ahead and Wave it over....

Saturday, March 15, 2014
$199 from Amazon »

With Google's golden child fingerprints all over it, the ASUS Chromebox desktop will surely prove handsomer and smarter and better in every way than any other Web PC that tries to catch your eye. On the surface, it definitely...

Monday, September 2, 2013
$38 - $530 from HOLHO »

HOLHO. It's like a portmanteau of Holla! and Jai Ho! And the contraption is an Italian design, so we've got some real cultural diversity going on here in the world of holograms. A pyramid-shaped structure that sits on top...