Gear

Imperial Spherificator - Turn Any Food Into Caviar

The Imperial Spherificator. Sounds like something you'd find alongside Mega Maid in Lord Dark Helmet's cache of planet-destroying weapons. But in fact, this superbly named device isn't meant for destruction or Mel Brooks...

Standing Mixer Shark Plane Decals

$24.99 from Amazon »

I know you've been looking everywhere for it and now I've found it for you: a way to pimp your KitchenAid. A kit that will make creating cookie dough and kneading bread in your standing mixer look manly and badass. This...

Amazon Dash Buttons

$4.99 from Amazon »

Imagine snapping your fingers and--poof!--more coffee, bottled water, and toilet paper just show up at your door. Amazon Dash Buttons are like that, but maybe even better because pressing a button is actually way easier...

Pepo Watermelon Slicer

$11.99 from Amazon »

Avihai Shurin has done it again!...

Benchmade SOCP Dagger & Trainer

$123.25 from Amazon »

Greg Thompson developed both the Special Operations Combative Program and the SOCP Dagger system now fabricated by Benchmade. The skeletonized fixed blade is made of 440C steel with an undulating handle and end finger...

Inflatable Floating Bathtub

$199.99 from Amazon »

Bathtime anytime! This portable inflatable bathtub fills up for sudsing up in front of the TV, outside the RV, even on the lake. Because, yes, it also floats. And with a zip-up top cover to keep the water warm, built-in...

Helix Wrist Cuff with Bluetooth Headphones

$99 - $199 from Ashley Chole »

If you're tired of wearables telling you how out of shape, under-hydrated, and sleep-deprived you are, one good thing about Helix is that it doesn't even know how to be that judgmental. Though this wrist cuff technically...

Crusader Forge Apex 3D Folding Knife

$1,225 from KnifeArt »

They say the Apex, a Crusader Forge issue patterned in 3D camo, is built like a tank. They also say the expression "built like a tank" is way overused in the knife world. Then they say when it comes to this folding knife...

UO Smart Beam Laser Projector

Sold Out from Amazon »

Celluon takes a slightly more humble route, bragging only about its PicoPro's ability to fit in your pocket, but SK Telecom goes straight for the pinnacle of accomplishment, calling its UO Smart Beam Laser Projector The...

Fully Functional Palm-Size Cannon

Nope, it doesn't just shoot spitballs. This 1:32 scale replica of the Civil War-era Field Howitzer cannons sucks up and then blows back out good old booming black powder and BBs. With the help of a piece of firecracker...

Planetary Glass Set

$49.99 from ThinkGeek »

On top of their sweet swirly interpretations of what our solar system would look like if it were made of heat-wrapped glass and sized for juice drinking and candle burning, two things are cool about ThinkGeek's Planetary...

Giant Rideable T-Rex Bike

$2k from Craigslist »

Of course, of course Portlandia is the Craig's List source for a giant rideable T-Rex bike. I can smell Burning Man 2014 and self-entitled cries of "Share the road!" bellowing through major downtown arterials all over...

Old-Fashioned Electric/Manual Ice Cream Maker

$81.35 - $105.88 from Amazon »

What's nice about this old-fashioned pine bucket ice cream maker is that it has both a 3500 rpm high torque motor that you can use to make the ice cream and a hand crank that you can tell everyone you used to make the...

Dog Pool Float & Lounger

$69.50 - $129.50 from Frontgate »

Now that I've given you the rundown of your own best bets for summer water toys, I figured I'd throw a bone to Fido over there so he won't feel left out. But first I need a few minutes to find the tequila and toast myself...

Italia Artisan Pizza Oven

$336.57 from Amazon »

It's pricier than a KettlePizza wood-fired pie from your Weber kit, but if for some reason you're not into mixing your grills with your ovens, Camp Chef's Italia Artisan Pizza Oven is still a reasonably affordable and...

Holus Interactive Holographic Display

$450 - $530 from H+ Technology »

Holus shows you your board game. Your model. Your mama. In a form condensed to the size of your tabletop, enhanced to 3 dimensions, and manipulated by the powers of technology and Grayskull into a holographic image. Holus...

The Two Fisted Drinker

$19.99 from Two Fisted Drinker »

One way to be a patriot (official) is to wear red, white & blue. And one way to be a Super Patriot (unofficial) is to wear red, white & blue while blowing shit up and getting completely trashed on the 4th of July. I've...

Floating Record Vertical Turntable

$349 from Gramovox »

Whether you pride yourself on your extensive vinyl collection, have a particularly snazzy record you want to show off, or just think a vertical turntable would look sweet in your media room, Gramovox's Floating Record...

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Odin Modular Puzzle Dog Toy

$23 from Up Dog Toys »

We have geometric rubber dog toys and we have dog toys that dole out treats to clever pooches who solve their puzzle. What Up Dog Toys feels we've been missing are dog toys that sport a modern design. You know, that won't...

Triple Beverage Dispenser Backpack

$27.38 from Amazon »

Oh, yeah, butt munch? There's a party in your pants and everybody's coming? Well there's a party on my back and...and...everybody's getting free refills of beer and margaritas while I carry this hot ass beverage dispenser...

StarTech Hard Drive Duplicator & Eraser

$249.58 from Amazon »

Clone data or eradicate it from the earth forever. Ironically, StarTech's hard drive duplicator and eraser can do either. Or maybe not so ironically, since both are techniques commonly employed by spies and evildoers...

Nanoform Sapphire Eternal Storage Disk

$284 - $632 from Fahrenheit 2451 »

Sapphire isn't just a name Fahrenheit 2451 gave their Nanoform storage disk because they thought it looked dreamy photographed against that shade of blue background. Rather, the Nanoform disk itself is made from 2 thin...

Venn Diagram Serving Platter

They say you can use a Venn diagram to solve logic and reasoning puzzles, such as: Half of all Clinks are Clunks, half of all Rattles are Bangs, and half of all Rattles are Clunks. Considering the limited information...

Model 01 Typist's Keyboard

$299 from Keyboardio »

I know the Model 01 is a "typist's keyboard" because some enthusiastic whippersnapper used it to type an F'in fat wad of text explaining the sculpted hardwood butterfly's design elements and functionality on maker Keyboardio's...

Pub-Nub Bike-Mounted Bottle Opener

$23.49 from Firebox.com »

Most people I've seen riding bikes shouldn't even be allowed to do it hanging on tight and sober, much less fiddling with a bottle and opener on their handlebar and drunk. Nonetheless, this Pub-Nub bike-mounted bottle...

The Big Bobber Floating Cooler

$29.88 from Amazon »

You may not get a bite, but you'll always have a drink. The Big Bobber Floating Cooler holds 12 cans of beer with ice and makes a slow day of float fishing in a redneck's bass boat a helluva lot more enjoyable. The lightweight...

John Neeman Hunting Knives

$340 - $780 from John Neeman »

I always hear that ladies like Latin lovers, but after a quick perusal of the sexy, hand-finessed artistry comprising the John Neeman knife gallery I'll bet the outdoorsy girls out there are going to be on the lookout...

goTenna Off-Grid Signal Generator

$149.99 from goTenna »

To keep it short, I guess you could say goTennas turn smartphones into really powerful walkie-talkies. Except more like walkie-texties. The self-contained signal generators require no cell towers, WiFi connectivity, or...

Airwheel Self-Balancing Electric Unicycle

$369 from Amazon »

Similar to the Hovertrax, but taking Team Circle over Team Straight Line, the Airwheel is a self-balancing scooter that rides like a unicycle with a motor. And no seat. And without the sidekick bear in a tutu....

Mini Cooli Handheld USB Air Conditioner

$16.89 from Amazon »

Evaporative cooling science, USB charging technology, the engineering of smallness--all the luxuries of living in the 21st century come together in this handheld air conditioner so that the next time it's 127 degrees...

PicoPro Pocket Projector

$349 from Amazon »

They say it's a pocket-sized movie theater, but I bet Celluon's PicoPro projector will mostly be relegated to boring applications like office presentations and impromptu TED talks at Palo Alto Starbucks stores. If I got...

The Naked Cooler

$80 - $120 from Kickstarter »

When I think of a Naked Cooler I imagine a big rectangular box that's really cold and full of naked people. Kind of like a sauna. But cold. And with the exception of myself, containing ladies only. But since that project...

SensorWake Smell-Based Alarm Clock

$87 from SensorWake »

Smells are powerful things. Particularly those of pubescent feet and dirty farts. But freshly baked croissants, brewing coffee, and cut grass can leave a decent impact too. Decent and, according to SensorWake, waaaaay...

Indiana Jones Cat Bridge

$150 - $240 from Catastrophic Creations »

This listing is for an Indiana Jones Cat Bridge, but it appears that in order to make it a viable lounging place for your own cat, you will also have to construct an entire Temple of the Chachapoyan Warriors to assist...

Birthday Drink Floating Candle

$12.99 from Amazon »

As a prelude to presenting your favorite birthday boy or girl with The Joker card and a prank candle that burns 25% apple pie and 75% dirty fart, bring out a nice pint of beer or glass of wine with this floating birthday...

Light - The Phone Only Phone

$100 from The light phone »

Light Phone is credit card-sized cell phone that pairs with your existing phone. It is designed to be used as little as possible, and comes with no bells or whistles. Both figuratively and literally. Without even a display...

FOVE Eye Tracking Virtual Reality Headset

$375 - $399 from FOVE »

From viewing to controlling to FOVE. They're calling the headset with eye tracking capabilities the 3rd generation of virtual reality; the generation that will allow users not only to see and physically control their...

Marshall Bluetooth Speaker By John Varvatos

Aside from the addition of his name in 2 locations, I'm not sure what makes Marshall's Woburn Bluetooth speaker by John Varvatos better than the original Marshall Woburn Bluetooth speaker. I'm also not sure what qualifies...

The Sound Torch Flaming Bluetooth Speaker

$158 - $165 from Kickstarter »

We've seen speakers that make light dance and speakers that make water dance, so it's only natural that someone would come up with one that, er, lights a fire under the feet of fire. The Sound Torch is a Bluetooth speaker...

Fibonacci Clock

$135 from Kickstarter »

Philippe Chretien created his Fibonacci Clock for "nerds with style." And, more importantly, nerds with the smarts to perform complex mathematical equations in their head whenever they want to use the Fibonacci Clock...

Beer Bottle Stein Lid

$10.99 from Amazon »

With hats off and bottles raised we say Prost! And I'm not talking about the hats on our own heads, but those covering the heads of our beers. These stein lids have been shrunken down and noveltied up to fit over the...

Lily Autonomous Drone Camera

$499 from Lily »

My friend Cornelius and I threw a Lily in the air once in 6th grade. She dropped like a sack of twice-baked bacon and brown butter potatoes. (Don't worry, there was a lake there to catch her.) But throw this Lily in the...

MIITO Heating Rod & Kettle Alternative

$101 from MIITO »

MIITO is kind of like a magic wand that commands the elements. I mean, as long as the elements you want to command are liquid, and your command to them is to boil. An eco-friendly alternative to the kettle, MIITO combines...

NES Cartridge Flasks

$19.99 from Amazon »

Want some pixelated vodka? An 8-bit .08 BAC? With these NES cartridge flasks nostalgic favorites like Super Mario Bros., Duck Hunt, and Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!! become portals not only to good time gaming marathons on...

Chain Chomp Cat Bed

According to Catastrophic Creations, this Chain Chomp Cat Bed "took and incredibly long amount of time to make." Good thing cats are so appreciative of their owners' gifts and love, and reciprocate in kind by never missing...

Orbit1 Electroplater - Coat Anything in Metal

$1,999 - $2,199 from Orbit1 »

The Midas Touch: now available for as little as $2 per gram. 3D printing is still cool and all, but in technology years it's getting to be an old man. Between hobbyists being able to print their trinkets on desktop models...

Rebel Bass Guitar

$500 from Etsy »

No longer must you search the galaxy to find this Rebel Bass, but you will have to wait at least 3 months to get it. Last Fall, after photos of his custom Star Wars guitars had gone viral online, Englishman Doni opened...

nScope Portable Electronics Lab

$89 - $165 from nScope »

nScope advertises itself to consumers the same way I advertise myself to ladies*: safe enough for beginners, powerful enough for experts. nScope is a portable electronics workbench that connects to any laptop to produce...

Tricked Toys Metal Phone Cases

$40 - $80 from Tricked Toys »

Tricked Toys CNC machines all of their smartphone cases from 6061 aluminum, solid copper, or solid brass. If you like their street artsy look, then grab your screwdriver: the metal cases actually bolt together around...

Marvel Superhero Family Car Decals

$9.99 from Amazon »

Usually I hope a giant flock of pigeons craps on those cars with the stick figure family decals on them...unless the scene goes on to show T-Rex eating everyone...but I don't think I'd find these Marvel superhero versions...

Star Wars Wine Stoppers & Lightsaber Cheese Knives

$12.50 - $109.95 from Etsy »

Happy Star Wars Day! May the 4th be with you. And, thanks to Zeitgass' Dark Side metal stoppers and lightsaber knives, also with your fine 2004 Cabernet Franc and stinky goaty hunk of barnyard cheese....

Corkcicle Arctican Stainless Steel Can Cooler

$17.21 from Amazon »

If you need the Corkcicle Arctican to keep your can of beer cold for 3 hours, because it takes you 3 hours to drink a can of beer...maybe you should you switch back to cans of sodie. While the company's stainless steel...

Baby Up In This B*tch Car Decal

$5.99 from Amazon »

Step back, son, and give this minivan a wide berth. Because the soccer mom driving it: 1) is a terrible speed-up-slow-down-please-just-pick-a-lane driver; 2) keeps yelling at her 8-year-old to put the lid back on his...

Coyote Face Pet Harness

$75 from Etsy »

I don't know whether that cat looks more pissed that someone put a harness on him or that the face of the coyote he just gutted and ate from the inside out when it tried to swallow him whole is still stuck to it....

Pyle Pocket Projector with Built-in WiFi

$369.99 from Amazon »

The Pyle Smart Mini Pocket Projector couldn't decide whether it wanted to be a compact photo/video viewer, a laptop, a TV, or an MP3 Player, so it decided to be a true Renaissance Projector and conquer them all. In addition...

nexpaq Modular Smartphone Case

$89 - $109 from nexpaq »

Since we're still waiting for a modular cell phone to emerge from the Sea of Google, nexpaq proposes that in the interim we...wait...but hopefully for less time...for their forthcoming modular cell phone case. Customizable...

BevPod Slim Cooler

$34 from Bevpod »

Start with a Beer Briefcase. Add some ice. And take away the sense that it should be handcuffed to your wrist. There you'll have the BevPod, an ultra-slim cooler capable of chilling up to 10 cans or 6 bottles in a fraction...

O-Mega Star Warrior Stun Gun

$109.95 from Amazon »

But officer, it's just a movie prop. See, they used an O-Mega Star Warrior Stun Gun in Demolition Man, Con-Air, and The Last Boy Scout. I'm just role-playing and...ow! I see you are not. Can you at loosen those cuffs...

Hidetoshi Nakayama Bolt Action Pen

$420 from Monkey Edge »

I've never understood why people drop hundreds of dollars on things like blue jeans and wine when Carhartt's and 2 Buck Chuck will do just fine jobs of covering your ass and getting you drunk. But spending hundreds of...

Surround Sound Bluetooth Pillowcase

Discontinued

The mysterious Alex of Boston, MA says he's an inventor who is shy to share his inventions. But someone found at least one of them, the SIO Musical Pillow Sheet, because today Alex has been inundated with over 700 inquiries...

Dragon Cake Pan

$24.99 from ThinkGeek »

What's going to be harder: getting the cake eggs away from the dragon guarding them, or getting the cake eggs out of the Dragon Cake Pan without destroying them? Those with the ambition and determination of Dany Targaryen...

CU.breaker Rubik's Cube Charger

With student Chang soo Lee's Cu.breaker concept you don't have to solve the puzzle, it does. This Rubik's Cube-esque device is a cell phone charger that 1) reflects rate and capacity of its device's charge and 2) shuts...

XM42 Handheld Flamethrower

$699 from XM42 »

The XM42 aims to be the world's first commercially available handheld flamethrower. Free of pressurized tanks and car-wash sprayers, and simple for most anyone to use, it also calls itself "what a real flamethrower should...

Darth Vader Color-Changing Lamp

$120 from Amazon »

Luke, I am your father. And as such, there are a few things you should know about me. For example, in my free time, I enjoy attending raves. Dancing one's ass off to Kaskade is an exceptional way to clear the mind and...

Dutch Lab Cold Drip Coffee Brewers

$310 - $7,300 from Dutch Lab »

Two things I don't know are what Dutch coffee even is and how to make even a cup of regular old coffee in the regular old coffee maker in our staff kitchenette (in fact, an office-wide vote has forbidden me from touching...

Sloth Tea Infuser

$9.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Uh oh. Mr. Sloth dozed off with his ass hanging in a cup of boiling water. And, mmmm, in contrast to skunk ass, sloth ass smells amazing. Like peachberry jasmine sutra. Or is that tranquil strawberry dream?...