A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Bar
Thursday, January 29, 2015
$44.99 from Sip Dark »

Settle down and chill your bullets* with some Bulleit, and settle down and chill your Bulleit with some bullets. Sip Dark, purveyor of fine beverage chilling stones and sipping gear, has created the Original Whiskey Bullet....

Tuesday, January 27, 2015
$169 from Coolbox »

Hmmm, it appears that a certain cooler has started a trend. And while the Coolbox doesn't have a blender...yet...this so-called "toolbox of the future" does transcend all other toolboxes I've seen in terms of features, handiness...

Wednesday, December 31, 2014
$15.59 from Firebox.com »

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that...he's gone....

Wednesday, January 21, 2015
$15.99 from Animi Causa »

She waits. She lurks. She stalks. And then suddenly, out of the depths of my 8-quart stock pot, Nessie emerges. Oh the terror! The foreboding doom! The...hey, what's the Loch Ness Monster got in tow there? Is that a ladle...

Bar
Saturday, January 24, 2015
$26.99 - $29.99 from Roo Balls! »

Want to be a true baller? Then grab that Triple IPA and crack it open with the scrotum of a Red Kangaroo. Or an Eastern Grey. Roo Balls turns (humanely and legally acquired*) castrated kangaroo bits into beer and wine bottle...

Wednesday, January 14, 2015
$7.99 - $38.99 from Amazon »

Schnelle Engineering fabricates far more keychain pocket tools than will ever fit in your pocket, but if you can pick just one of the company's curiously-shaped designs, you'll be golden and FAA-compliant for cracking open your cold ones. Or digging rocks out of your shoes. Or tightening the leaky faucet in newly-single 402's unit on your way up from the lobby....

Wednesday, January 28, 2015
$74.99 from Amazon »

For children ages 3 and up?! Pssshhh. Why would I waste a giant, 6-foot tall teepee on a kid when I can line it with lights, slide a skinned wampa rug inside, and entertain my lady friends? Especially my lady friend Kate Upton...

Thursday, June 26, 2014
$24.95 from Fleshlight »

Though it's not electric or piston-powered...or Japanese...like this friendly sex toy, the LaunchPAD does employ advanced technology in a valiant effort to enhance Man's alone time. The makers of male masturbatory aid the...

Saturday, September 24, 2011
$8.25 - $47.95 from Zazzle »

With the possible exception of the "AIDS" label that's covering half of Africa, some of these American stereotypes of the rest of world are surprisingly lacking in wickedness. I would have expected less superficial ignorance...

Wednesday, April 9, 2014
$180.23 from Amazon »

Note: The Japanese electric piston masturbator's NSFW designation serves not so much as a reminder that this device is not suitable to view at work as it does a reminder that it is not suitable to use at work. I found that...

Sunday, November 17, 2013
$99 - $145 from Grasshopper »

Ha! More proof that if pens wish to avoid extinction they better start bringing more to the table than a barrel full of ink! In fact, Grasshopper makes the biggest leap of all--the one I've been waiting for: it eliminates...

Monday, June 2, 2014
$5 - $100 from Galactic Cap »

"The Galactic Cap is a condom men will want to wear and their partners will love. A better alternative, it will increase condom use and promote healthier sex." Want to wear? Partners will love? Well. Considering this just-the-tip...

Wednesday, January 7, 2015
$24.99 from Curvit »

Curvit is a clip system that holds shower curtains in a concave position, thereby increasing shower space by up to 50%. It's a simple, inexpensive, and discreet solution that arrives pre-assembled and installs in 3 steps...

Thursday, January 22, 2015
$99 - $109 from Dolfi »

Ultrasonic technology is already used in consumer products such as humidifiers and jewelry cleaners, plus commercial electronics that sanitize the likes of medical and dental equipment, so all Dolfi is really doing here is...

Monday, January 26, 2015
$23.84 - $27.79 from Amazon »

Logical, intuitive, way more convenient than plugging one plug into another plug before it hits the wall. I wonder how long before all newly-installed outlets will contain USB ports in addition to the standard AC 3-prongs...

Sunday, January 18, 2015
$24 from Amazon »

Here's a grill for the inside, which is probably more pleasant to use this time of year than a grill for the outside. And it doesn't take up a fat wad of space, instead installing over a single burner on your range. And according...

Friday, January 2, 2015

Monsters in America: A Cryptozoological Map of the United States provides descriptions and locations of origin for beasts ranging from the Jersey Devil, Bigfoot, Mothman, and Chupacabra to Shunka Warakin, Caddy, the Honey...

Saturday, January 17, 2015
$235 from Etsy »

What to do with all those empty bottles of Crystal Head Vodka? I tried sending mine back to Dan Aykroyd for free refills, but it's been a few months and I still haven't gotten them back. So I think Rob of Moonshine Lamp Co....

Saturday, January 10, 2015
$189.50 from Amazon »

Sometimes it's kinda cool when the power goes out and you can pretend like you're camping in your own bedroom. Ha! Yeah, that's true for about 10 minutes once every 3 years, and only when it's between 65 and 72 degrees outside....

Thursday, January 26, 2012
$8.25 - $47.95 from Zazzle »

The sad thing is, I'm pretty sure all of these "jokes" are based on actual statistics from the US Census. The other sad thing is, I bet the 95% of us who couldn't name half of the color blocks when looking at a blank map...

Sunday, January 18, 2015
$5.87 from Amazon »

Isn't half the fun of cooking making a ginormous mess? And then spending hours you could be eating your Beef & Fritos Enchiladas cleaning up the kitchen afterward? Hmmm...maybe not so much. One of the top culinary offenses...

Sunday, November 9, 2014
$139.95 from Amazon »

Ooh, a hidden door to a boudoir of lingerie and sex toys? Maybe pretending to be interested in books wasn't the worst, most boring mistake I ever made to get a girl to like me after all. Yeah, babe, I do see your first edition...

Friday, December 5, 2014

Ladies. Why is it that I find it so difficult to shop for them, yet they seem to have no trouble at all shopping for themselves? Every time I try to buy the perfect gift for my mama or the girl at my local ice cream store...

Sunday, March 23, 2014
$13.95 - $60.90 from Zazzle »

A self-help guide to dealing with the enormous issue I face first thing in the morning every single day of my life and it's packaged as whimsical wall art that will add immeasurable character to my bathroom? How to Pee with...

Saturday, February 8, 2014
$12.99 - $36.99 from Amazon »

The Tiny Inconspicuous Handcuff Key is intended for use by trained law enforcement, military, and security professionals only. However, TIHK will sell a pair of them to anyone with a credit card and $13. Because that is the...

Thursday, August 28, 2014
$120 - $490 from Tactical Walls »

Although the word "tactical" has become as overused as the word "awesome", Tactical Walls reminds us there are still times when it can be applied meaningfully and justifiably. And also awesomely. Tactical Walls are inserts...

Bar
Monday, December 29, 2014
$149.95 from Amazon »

Sure, any jackass can sabre open a bottle of Champagne with a kitchen knife. But if I'm going to try that, I may as well just lay my fingers on the sidewalk and chop them off. Save bloodying up my mama's kitchen and wasting...

Sunday, January 29, 2012
$130 - $160 from It's Alive! Designs »

Think about those nights you bolt upright in bed, heart racing, salty with cold sweat, awakened from a nightmare just before you meet your final doom. Now think about the rush of relief you feel as you take in the solitude...

Monday, August 22, 2011
Discontinued

The Ashera is possibly the only cat that is acceptable for a single male to own. Because it's about the size of an ocelot, and weighs 30 freakin' pounds. And that's 30 pounds of genetically-gifted muscle, not 30 pounds of...

Saturday, January 17, 2015
$30 - $100 from Desbiens Design Research »

Oooh, a Rubin vase with your very own face to display on the mantel: nerds and narcissists, this Fahz is for you....

Bar
Friday, September 27, 2013
$35 from Etsy »

At first I thought the Dual Beer Glass was intended for sampling two different types of beers at once, and I was like, How the dickens am I supposed to keep one from spilling all over my crotch when I'm drinking the other?...

Tuesday, December 9, 2014
$27.99 from Amazon »

This Swiss Army tool will grant you access to Warren Buffett's safe deposit box, Chuck Norris' weapons stash, and Angelina Jolie's sex toy box. I mean, if you have the key and all. The KeySmart is a keychain designed to hold...

Thursday, December 11, 2014
$275 - $3k from Cryptex »

Talk about usable art. Justin Nevins' Cryptex Security Boxes might be the most compelling pieces of Keep Your Mitts Off My Stuff I've seen all year. Tactical shelving and hidden doors included. The designer hand makes 3 echelons...

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Stirring scenes from American history, meet stirring scenes from American sci-fi. This set of 4 Star Wars prints from Thirteenth Floor pits some of the Empire's worst villains against some of our own greatest war heroes. Each...

Tuesday, October 7, 2014
$19.21 from Amazon »

UZI incorporates a few different tools into its Defender line of pens to award them the "tactical" buzzword. This version, the TACPEN6-GM has a glass breaker and handcuff key fitted to its lightweight aircraft aluminum body....

Saturday, December 13, 2014

I can't believe it! Just yesterday I was thinking about cartoon sex--albeit between people, not dragons--and today I find a whole calendar of cartoon sex stills! And you know what: I think the thinking thinks even better subbing...

Monday, January 19, 2015
$33.99 from Amazon »

This past weekend I had a horrifying experience with the elements. It was 37 degrees outside, a veritable monsoon was falling from the sky, it was accompanied by gale force winds of at least 972 mph, and I was stuck in it....

Tuesday, January 13, 2015
$49 from Etsy »

I know we're almost halfway through January, but you still have, like, three hundred sixty...um...forty...like, a lot of days left in 2015 to 1) merit tracking by 2015 calendar and 2) grow a sick Arctic beard. Anna Marinenko's...

Friday, December 19, 2014

Ye draggers of the gluteus maximus out there may not be relegated to--gasp!--leaving your house and buying holiday gifts in person just yet. Below we have accumulated a few non-sucky mail-order offerings that, at printing...

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Deck the halls with boughs of holly and deck my right hand with a few drams of single barrel Scotch from the Whisky Advent Calendar. Yeah, like I'll be able to spread that pot of peaty liquid gold over 24 whole days, what...

Thursday, July 31, 2014
$29 from Amazon »

Each of these Higo no Kami knives, traditional Japanese non-locking folding blades, are handmade and imported directly from Japan. And if you don't believe me, believe the superb English translation of their product description:...

Wednesday, January 14, 2015
$150 from Studio Ve »

The Orbits is a 3D clock made of physics. A trio of rings intersect and rotate to display the time with depth, scientific artfulness, and in a way that will promote bumping into the clock every time you pass, and probably...

Wednesday, January 21, 2015
$25 from Etsy »

"Batman, what did your parents get you for Christ-" "WHACK! My parents are DEEEAAAAAAD you sniveling little sidekick!"...

Monday, March 24, 2014
$14 - $19 from Panny »

I've seen a Veruca Salt-sized Santa Claus sack of wallet and keychain "innovations" over the past few years, and while Panny may not turn the world on its head like the Coin card consolidator, it's definitely making a calculated...

Monday, August 27, 2012

Though only a concept product--and one that debuted a few years ago--the Cloud Levitating Sofa remains maybe the coolest idea for and aesthetic execution of a couch ever. So I was thinking maybe one of you entrepreneurial...

Monday, February 4, 2013

World's. Coolest. Not an understatement. Take 10 seconds to watch the Fletcher Capstan expandable table video, and the rest of the day off work to recover from your blown mind. Or maybe you'll disagree that the mesmerizing...

Monday, November 10, 2014
$10k from Sky Mall »

My friend Victor showed me this Serenity Pod. Actually he showed me the ones meant for dogs and cats, but I was like, Victor. Why would I spend one thousand dollars to give my pet a world of serenity and slumber when I can...

Friday, January 16, 2015
$22.32 - $70.68 from ArtSider »

Molecular biologist-turned-designer Eleanor Lutz regularly publishes the science-themed charts, infographics, and illustrations she creates on her blog Tabletop Whale. Here with the "Guide to Muscles" poster (officially "A...

Tuesday, November 5, 2013
$557k - $10 million from The Human Regenerator »

Well, $10 million is the price for the super deluxe, diamond-encrusted model of The Human Regenerator. Bargain hunters who are OK with regenerating unsound cells, strengthening their immune systems, and enhancing skin structure...

Sunday, July 6, 2014
$9,960 from Duffy London »

I don't know if falling onto Duffy London's forthcoming oceanic cross-section coffee table will send you into The Abyss, but I can almost guarantee running into it will stub all of your toes and bloody your entire leg from...

Friday, September 20, 2013
$10k - $20k from Rock Paper Robot »

Oh holy balls, it's a Rubik's Cube with the structural integrity of a marshmallow. In laymen's terms. In technical terms, the Float table is "a matrix of 'magnetized' wooden cubes that levitate with respect to one another."...

Monday, December 29, 2014
$1,918 - $3,517 from Etsy »

Latvian artist Girts Smelters began his volcanic basalt fiber furniture startup about 4 years ago in his country's capitol city of Riga. Today, his wickeresque hanging chairs have found homes everywhere from Google and Mozilla...

Sunday, December 28, 2014
$69.95 from Garage Beacon »

The Garage Beacon claims to turn your smartphone into an automatic garage door remote. I think this is a pretty good idea. Because I remember driving places with my grandpa when I was boy of 5 or 6. I'd sit in the car and...

Monday, February 3, 2014
$36.95 from Zazzle »

Jay Simons: student; amateur graphic designer; Slovakian; Internet cartographer. If the Web were divided into land masses, grouped along lines of latitude and meridians and flattened into a map on your desk, what would it...

Saturday, December 6, 2014
$21.99 - $24.99 from Bondic »

The future of glue is...not a glue! That's Bondic's battle cry anyway. According to its creators, the world's first Liquid Plastic Welder works anywhere glue does, plus anywhere glue fails like a stoner playing Whac-A-Mole....

Sunday, July 22, 2012
$47.90 from Amazon »

The Bug-A-Salt might be the coolest thing invented for killing winged and many-legged pests since clapping your hands together and not coming up empty. Using nothing more than a few granules of regular table salt as its projectile...

Monday, February 10, 2014

While I would prefer a wax color more masculine than pink, I--What? Pink is the color of unconditional love and nurturing? Oh. OK, Mama.--I guess my mama likes pink. Yep.... Working from home today.... Anyway, I applaud designer...

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Ring is a vibrating alarm clock that fits over the finger to gently and noiselessly rip slumberers from their states of peace. It is ideal for couples, the hearing impaired, and people who associate the sound of their wakeup...

Tuesday, December 9, 2014
$119.37 from Amazon »

I don't chop onions or slice cucumbers, I slay them with a 67-layer damascus dragon pattern! This Japanese stainless steel knife is super sharp and clad in everyone's favorite hip-yet-medieval-sounding steel: damascus....

Thursday, January 15, 2015
$49.99 from Amazon »

L-E-Ds that don't make you want to crawl under your desk and take an N-A-P. (The OxyLED desk lamp will leave that to conference calls and the Ben Stein you've scored as a boss.) This ultra-low voltage and low temp light is...

Saturday, November 29, 2014
$1,500 from Kozyndan »

Holy crap, it's fantastical beast overload! It almost hurts to look at it, it's so stirring and extraordinary. And, according to the unicornarwhal sculpture's creators, it also explains a lot. How can a whale with a ginormous...

Saturday, January 19, 2013
$20 - $50 from Society 6 »

Greg-guillemin reigns supreme: Best Paparazzo Ever. I knew Wonder Woman's rack wasn't real. But I have to say, I definitely took it for silicone over Kleenex. Her tissue-molding skills are impressive. Superheros may pick their...

Sunday, January 20, 2013
$55k from hi can »

Italian in both slick aesthetics and siesta-time concept, I exaggerate not when I say the HiCan high fidelity canopy bed will persuade its occupants never to leave its ultra-modern, four-poster confines. HiCan designer Edoardo...

Saturday, November 23, 2013
$275 - $899 from Kult »

Holy Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker Suite! Poison Ivy has just given radical new meaning to the term "thunder thighs." I don't know whether to stop drooling and try to voodoo her out of the print, into my living room, or surround...

Monday, March 12, 2012
$39.99 from Amazon »

The actual name of this product is Moonlight Pillow. Really? Has the moon been eating Skittles? Did it swallow a gay pride parade? Because the moon I look at has certainly never gleamed the entire Roy G Biv rainbow. Except...

Sunday, July 27, 2014
$93 from ZEUSArsenal »

I received a sample of the ZEUS Thunder vaporizer pen for a state-of-matter-changing test drive. Unfortunately, it was right after my mama coerced me into signing an agreement to submit to random marijuana tests in exchange...

Monday, March 5, 2012

The Bird's Nest Bed can accommodate up to 16 people at once. Take note swingers, Mormons, women undergoing IVF treatments, and the Duggar family! The giant basin of comfort was brainstormed and brought to life by O*GE Creative...

Tuesday, December 31, 2013
$59 - $75 from Etsy »

One good way to bring the Dark Side and the Light Side together is to get them all stoned. What, we're fighting? I'm trying to eradicate you from the galaxy? OK, well...why don't we order some deep dish pizzas...and a few...