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Wednesday, October 9, 2013
$978 from Sruli Recht »

Thorns In meaning #1: Ten thousand mic-rose thorns lining the inside of this shark skin glove. Thorns In meaning #2: Ten thousand mic-rose thorns gouging fish-hook style into the hand of its wearer, such that pulling the glove...

Tuesday, November 18, 2014
$249.95 - $269.95 from Amazon »

As if riding a motorcycle while protecting your skin from flaying off and bones from splitting in half weren't cool enough, Knox is going to make it look like you have mech hands in the process. More armor than gloves, Handroids...

Saturday, February 23, 2013
$16.99 from Amazon »

When you're sittin' on the john and the toilet paper's gone, be a man, use your hand...or get some Shittens. Protecting ourselves from fecal matter should be a priority right up there with wearing sunscreen and planning for retirement. Shit is gross. That's why it's the star of biting zingers such as "Shithead," "Shit for brains," "Eat shit and die," and "Who the F anonymously sent me this pile...

Friday, November 14, 2014
$20 from Amazon »

Frostbite-free constant contact. That's what I'm talkin' about. Though touchscreen gloves have been around for a while, Nanotips tweaks the idea of hand warmers that don't prohibit smartphone and tablet use by enabling its...

Monday, August 19, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Getting pummeled and concussed by a 350-pound defensive lineman as I fumble the team's potentially game-winning TD during the last play of the 4th quarter still might be worth it if I had a pair of Under Armour's Alter Ego...

Sunday, December 16, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Of course I don't need a mitten-koozie hybrid so that I may drink chilled alcoholic beverages in freezing temperatures, one right after another like the gluttonous, midwestern lush that I am, without rendering my delicate fingers too cold to maintain a proper grip on my aluminum King of Beers can. That's not why I want a Skuuzi....

Friday, September 2, 2011
$11.98 from Amazon »

Finally a real need has been filled. Underpants for your hands. Great for protecting your hands while... eating chocolate and scratching your butt? Maybe these gloves should be worn under your regular gloves to protect them...

Friday, January 25, 2013
$39.59 from Firebox.com »

Four things to keep in mind, men, when you buy a Smitten, the double handed glove of love, for your wife or girlfriend this Valentine's Day. 1) The Smitten is a glove built for two schmoopy folks' simultaneous use. 2) It is...

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