Booze

SunnyD Vodka Seltzer

Getting drunk makes me nostalgic, and now, thanks to SunnyD Vodka Seltzers, getting nostalgic will make me drunk. Well, tipsy. Maybe. The orange drank's new alcoholic beverage is only 4.5% ABV. But if I can drink a whole...

Just the Tipsy Sparkling Wine

$37 - $42.99 Just the Tipsy »

I'm dude enough to admit it: I learned about Just the Tipsy Bubbly Rose, a sparkling wine served in a bottle shaped like penis, through Chrissy Teigan's Twitter feed about 5 minutes before writing this. Another thing...

Christmas Vacation Griswold House Boxed Wine

$49.99 World Market »

Does it matter the quality, or even the kind, of wine that comes in the box of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Griswold House Boxed Wine? Is that really going to have an impact on whether or not any of us buys it...

VELVEETA Veltini Kit - DIY Cheese Martini

$49.95 Goldbelly »

Of all the gross applications of otherwise fine foods, the VELVEETA Veltini Kit is definitely...one of the better ones. Cheese, olives, vodka, vermouth, and, and Jumbo VELVEETA Shells & Cheese?! I mean, sure, it looks...

Lyre's Non-Alcoholic Spirits

Dry January. Fun times. What's that, Lyre's? Your non-alcoholic line of spirits is going to remove the sarcasm from those statements? Alright, purveyor of booze-free gin, whiskey, rum, tequila, liqueurs, and aperitifs...

Nixta Licor de Elote - Corn Liqueur

Liquid. Corn. Sounds like a joke to me. A real corny joke. But, hey, I hear Nixta Licor de Elote - that's Corn Liqueur for the non-Spanish speakers - is actually pretty tasty. I'd try it. Way before I'd try Scottish Beithir...

Scottish Beithir Fire 150-Proof Beer

$55.50 88 Brewery »

Scottish Beithir Fire is 75% ABV, or 150-proof beer. Nope, not joking. Yep, pretty sure that makes it the World's Strongest Beer, a title Scotland's 88 Brewery has now usurped from Scotland's Brewmeister, and their 67.5%...

Addition Beer Sauce - Beer-Enhancing Savory Bitters

$14 Addition »

Uh-oh, did you drink your last microbrew or large format Belgian import? Now all that's left in the fridge is Rolling Rock and Michelob Ultra? It's cool, dude. When life makes you beer bitter, grab some beer bitters...

BooZi Alcohol & Wine Purifier

$28 Amazon »

Wine? Whiskey? Tequila? Scapegrace Gin? BooZi it up to bid good riddance to 2020 with an alcohol and wine purifier its makers say will "make every drink taste amazing with no hangover!"...

Scapegrace Gin

$79.95 - $124.95 Scapegrace Distillery »

Scapegrace Gin begins with the finest Kiwi water in the land. New Zealand-based Scapegrace Distillery builds its namesake liquors from the glacial waters of the Southern Alps of New Zealand - bodies the company claims...

Party-Ready Jello Shots

Do you have a Shotty mouth? Do you want to? These party-ready Jello shots might not get your mama's stamp of approval, but serve them to your friends at the pool, in the backyard, or at your next rager, and they'll probably...

Gincredible Dipper - Gin Fun Dip

$12.99 Firebox.com »

I have a lot of good news and a lot of bad news about the Gincredible Dipper, basically a take on Fun Dip that incorporates real, boozy elderflower gin in gel form. Let's start with the good...

Lucky Charms Beer

If it wasn't already enough that you can eat an 8-pound bag of cereal marshmallows, now thanks to Smartmouth Brewing's Saturday Morning beer, a Lucky Charms-inspired IPA, you can drink 8 pints of them too...

IHOPS - Pumpkin Pancake Stout Beer from IHOP

Ye who thought Pumpkin would never find a better mate than Spice Latte, check out IHOPS, the new Pumpkin Pancake Stout beer from IHOP. Ha! I see your venti tastes-like-fall coffee drink, and raise you 16 ounces of baking...

James T. Kirk Bourbon

A few shots of James T. Kirk Bourbon will allow men to boldly go where no man has gone before: to Tom Brady's doorstep with a trench coat, boombox, and all the right words to convince Gisele she should leave him for you...

Traeger Smoked Simple Syrup Cocktail Mixer

Sold Out Amazon »

A cocktail that tastes like a campfire? Nah, Traeger doesn't go that far with their Smoked Simple Syrup. The mixer is infused with woody flavors more commonly found in your food and drinks - clove and vanilla. And rather...

Mucha Liga Tequila

Mucha Liga has made a tag team trio of lucha libre-themed tequilas, and in so doing has also made a fantasy many of us never even knew we had come true. Which mask will you wear ('til you puke 'n' pass out) during your...

Shower Beer

Shower Beer sounds like a bottle of ale-scented novelty soap. Which would be cool. But what Shower Beer really is is even better: a 6-ounce bottle of actual pale ale conceived and packaged to be downed in 3 perfect gulps...

Spiked Sparkling Water

$9.99 - $15.99 Truly Spiked & Sparkling »

Think less Bartles & Jaymes* and more Talking Rain. Truly Spiked & Sparkling isn't a sugary wine cooler or Mike's-style malt beverage, but a bottle of simple sparkling water with a natural twist. And a slightly sweet...

Peanut Butter & Jam Old Fashioned

$56.59 Firebox.com »

PB&J has grown up. Now it's the perfect companion for the dude who just wants to relax with a sophisticated adult beverage...but doesn't want to stray too far from his favorite squishy, sticky, nummy childhood sammich...

Outer Space Vodka

$5.99 - $29.99 Outer Space Vodka »

What's scarier than this freak parade of masks on Halloween night? The head-splitting, toilet-hugging hangover we're all going to have Sunday morning. Especially with 1) Daylight Saving Time ending at 2 a.m., giving everyone...

Vodquila

Vodquila. A mix of vodka, tequila, and a first class ticket to a hangover-free Sunday morning. I know they say two wrongs don't make a right and all that crapola, but I don't think that's true for alcohol. Like, I'm pretty...

Hush Moonshine

Discontinued

According to Hush, "The moonshine business was built on confidence, loyalty and the ability to keep secrets." That's a nice way to put it. Nicer than, "The moonshine business originated as an illegal and criminal activity...

Abashiri Blue Beer

$8.19 - $21.19 Firebox.com »

One guess as to where Abashiri Blue Beer comes from. Hint: not Smurf Village, and not outer space. Which leaves only one other logical choice, right? Yep: Japan...