Collapsible Colander & Cutting Board

$19.99 - $27.99 Amazon »

Aaarrrggghhh! I don't have anything to say about a collapsible colander and cutting board combo! I'm only running it at all because my mama swears it is a handy thing to have for a New Year's Eve get together, or any...

ASB Nautilus Glass LED Hot Tub

Now this is a hot tub that looks like a time machine. The ASB Nautilus is the world's first all-glass hot tub. And to further highlight that feat of physics, ASB has lined their whirlpools' floors with RGB LEDs in customizable...

Double Succulent Planter Swing

Damn you, Double Succulent Planter Swing! I woke up this morning to my cat playing bongos on my forehead, followed by my mama calling me at 6:45 a.m. saying I need to come fix her internet because it's "broken." And I...

Car Window Breaker Bracelet

$11.99 Amazon »

A Car Window Breaker Bracelet. That's a bracelet with a glass breaker charm for busting open car windows. What a great emergency rescue tool for drivers to always have on hand / wrist!...

Japanese Linen Slippers

$23.11 Etsy »

"Japanese Linen Slippers" could mean anything from square-toed sandals with a thong strap to shoes shaped like squished-flat cats and covered in fish scales and Shiba Inu fur. These particular Japanese Linen Slippers...

Things That Can Kill You Wall Calendar

Sold Out Amazon »

The Things That Can Kill You Wall Calendar doesn't want to ruin the surprise. Aside from the coconut on its front cover - a well-known death-dealer to many of us - the 2022 date tracker doesn't provide a single reveal...

Face Mask Extender & Ear Saver Straps

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I bought a set of these Face Mask Extender & Ear Saver Straps at the end of August, and my wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power, and I have probably worn them for over 24 cumulative hours each since then. I don't use them...

Clapping Monkey with Cymbals Tape Dispenser

$18.88 Amazon »

Are you clapping monkey with cymbals happy about your Christmas presents this year? Or did you actually receive a Clapping Monkey with Cymbals...on a tape dispenser as a Christmas present this year?...

Diesel Sound of the Brave Cologne

$43 - $88 Amazon »

Sound of the Brave Cologne, Diesel? Seems to this dude the name should be Smell of the Brave. An eau de toilette made especially for:...

Snout Soother Dog Nose Balm

$18.95 Amazon »

While I am not a dog owner, seeing a dog with a dry, cracked nose hurts my heart. Bad. Like, almost as much as seeing one with only 3 legs. So I can only imagine the distress you must feel if you are a dog owner, and...

Kodiak Belt - Field Belt with Knife Sharpener Buckle

$69.99 Argali »

The Kodiak Belt has a knife sharpener buckle for instant blade-honing in the field. That's great news for backcountry hunters and campers, especially those willing to double up on belts, with a Kodiak on top and a Burls...

The Rocktopus

$15 - $3k Etsy »

Can you smell what The Rocktopus is cooking?! Mmmm, pulpo a la plancha...

F*ck 2021 New Year's Eve Tiara

$3.50 - $7 Etsy »

Yep, that about sums it up. And if you're like, "No. I want to ring in 2022 with a hard F*ck 2021. No asterisks, no censorship, nothing cute about it," well, you're in luck. Lantz and Lady, makers of the F*ck 2021 New...

adorTable Concrete Coffee Tables

What would you call Stephan Schmitz's adorTable concrete coffee tables? Deteriorated beauty? Post-apocalyptic design? Earthquake chic? This hyper-industrial, busted-up look isn't normally the type of furniture I'd go...

Ghostbusters Mini Ghost Trap with Lights & Sound

$11.16 Amazon »

Trap yourself some ghosts, or at least some passing interest in your desktop display, with this Ghostbusters Mini Ghost Trap. The 4" replica of the one used in the original 1984 Ghostbusters film also boasts lights and...

Wolf & Grizzly Fire Safe - Portable, Foldable Fire Pit

$39.95 Amazon »

The heading says "Wolf & Grizzly Fire Safe - Portable, Foldable Fire Pit," so what the hunk of metal are you actually looking at in this dude's hand? It's the fire pit. For real. Wolf & Grizzly's Fire Safe consists of...

Ultimate Camper Teardrop Trailer

What makes Ultimate Toys' Ultimate Camper so...ultimate? Well, the teardrop trailer comes with a shower-equipped bathroom, a convertible queen-sized bed, not one, but two kitchens, and, of course, the Ultimate branding...

LEGO Puzzle Boxes

$25 - $155 Etsy »

All LEGO sets present their builders with a puzzle of sorts, but cheat3 Puzzles levels up the process with their LEGO Puzzle Boxes. The brick formations arrive assembled, and in your choice of Easy, Medium, or Hard difficulty...

Hot Chocolate Design Pegasus Pumps

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Hot Chocolate Design names their winged, golden Mary Jane-style pumps "Pegasus," and, ladies, I can certainly see the appeal of going to your New Year's Eve party dressed as a mythical horse. But Pegasus doesn't have...

Viper Ring

$129 Amazon »

Welp, it's better than having a viper around your neck. This Viper Ring turns the Mangshan pit viper into a beautiful, formidable piece of jewelry. Its head sits atop your finger, while its body, er, snakes around either...

Brew Glitter - Edible Wine & Cocktail Glitter

$11.95 - $12.95 Amazon »

Brew Glitter. Dude. I have enough trouble getting glitter out of my house, my clothes, my - shiver - car if ever it encounters them, and now? Now? You're asking me to put myself in a position where I have to get glitter...

Chocolate Penguins

L.A. Burdick Chocolates has whipped up this winning waddle of penguins to wish you - and your choco-lovin' belly - Happy Holidays! The chocolatier's Chocolate Penguins gift box contains 9 "tuxedoed birds of Antarctica"...

Protection from Burnout! Pocket Guide

$2.50 Etsy »

Protection from Burnout!: A Workaholic's Guide to Taking a Fucking Break is a pocket-sized how-to for the overworked and overwrought that many, many, many...most...almost all of us could use right now. Except for my Aunt...

ABUSA Lambswool Insoles

$12.99 - $14.99 Amazon »

These ABUSA Lambswool Insoles for shoes, boots, and slippers provide no arch support, but Baaaaaa! Who needs arch support this winter when your feet are luxuriating in thick and cozy natural fleece?...