Food

Getting drunk makes me nostalgic, and now, thanks to SunnyD Vodka Seltzers, getting nostalgic will make me drunk. Well, tipsy. Maybe. The orange drank's new alcoholic beverage is only 4.5% ABV. But if I can drink a whole...

You dudes and ladies gotten a load - or a whiff - of Chazz Genitalia-Flavored Kettle Chips yet? They're available in both D*ck and Pus*y flavors, but (oddly? obviously?) but not a mixed bag of both. And though you probably...

I'm dude enough to admit it: I learned about Just the Tipsy Bubbly Rose, a sparkling wine served in a bottle shaped like penis, through Chrissy Teigan's Twitter feed about 5 minutes before writing this. Another thing...

Since New Zealand is better than anywhere else in the world, it stands to reason that butter from New Zealand is also better than butter from anywhere else in the world (no offense to Kerrygold). And lookee what we have...

Pass the kids the imitation Mrs. Butterworth's. Trees Knees' Coffee Maple Syrup brings pure, organic New York Catskill maple mixed with real Stumptown Coffee to the adults chowing down on pancakes and waffles in the morning...

The official name of this chocolate covered scorpion is "Dessert Scorpion." Just in case there is any confusion about whether you should eat it for breakfast or as a snack or on a dare. And also to distinguish it from...

Milk for Santa's cookies? Lame. This year I'm leaving out a can of Maple Stream instead, and letting 7 fluid ounces of sprayable maple syrup help him wash down the peanut butter blossoms, Corn Flake wreaths, and gingerbread...

Are you ready for a half-pound, 930-calorie Fruit Loop? No, not half a pound and 930 calories worth of Froot Loops*, a single Fruit Loop weighing 6.7 ounces and packing 930 cals into the happy...but maybe turning sad...

Good news, dudes! Brittle Brothers Bacon Peanut Brittle is cholesterol free! That means you can eat as much as you want of the Nashville-made candy packed with 4 times more nuts and real bacon, and it won't make you fat...

Sorry, family, we can't afford a beef tenderloin this year, but may I offer you one of these Brisket Candy Canes instead? Archie McPhee says he cooked them "low and slow," so they're probably nearly as good as a succulent...

Never spill the tea again with these loose leaf tea discs. At least not literally, and not before you brew it, thanks to this pressed-and-packed, bag-free design. The tea discs also come packaged in an eco-friendly bamboo...

Does it matter the quality, or even the kind, of wine that comes in the box of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Griswold House Boxed Wine? Is that really going to have an impact on whether or not any of us buys it...

Koko Nuggz weed-themed treats are so fun, so poppable, and so full of sugar and Rice Krispie carbs that even without the THC they'll probably get you high. Or, according to the Koko Nuggz nugget bakers, at least "shock...

Hostess Snack Cakes Bottled Iced Lattes bring one stop shopping for coffee and a pastry to a kitchen or office break room near you! The cakes even come pre-dunked! I'm trying to decide whether I'm delighted or disgusted...

Looks like Pop-Tarts have put on a few pounds. Now I know why they call it puff pastry. Tasty Pastry High Protein Snacks must think a lot of stuff out there is tasty...if you know what I mean...

Gather 'round, culinarians, as elegant meets elegant-er in these black-truffle-seasoned Pringles. Another unique Japanese twist on an otherwise All-American product (see also: Kit Kat Bars) Pringles Premium Black Truffle...

It's the 100th anniversary of dive bars! No, wait, it's the 100th anniversary of Miller High Life, No...no that's not it. Hold please. ... Ah! It's the 100th anniversary of ice cream bars! However, dive bars, and apparently...

Freshen your dry, acrid mouth, plus the churning belly action causing it, with NUDE Breath & Gut Mints. The dual-action pellets promise to relieve your body and its exhales of mask breath, coffee breath, odiferous food...

Of all the gross applications of otherwise fine foods, the VELVEETA Veltini Kit is definitely...one of the better ones. Cheese, olives, vodka, vermouth, and, and Jumbo VELVEETA Shells & Cheese?! I mean, sure, it looks...

Wood-fired pizza ovens, I see your 800-degree temperatures and crispy crusts, and raise you minus-100-degree temperatures and crispy crusts, crispy cheese, crispy pepperoni, and crispy tomato sauce! Freeze Dried Pepperoni...

It's gonna cost you a helluva lot more than hot fudge, sprinkles, and Old Spice, but Salt & Straw's Culinary Perfume, an edible fragrance and ice cream topping, is sure to be the foodie gift of the year. Or at least of...

Airy, crunchy, salty, and I can eat the whole bag in under 100 calories. SNACKLINS attacklinned my mouth a couple months ago, and I surrendered with joy...

According to 8Greens, one 8Greens Daily Greens Lollipops contains as much Vitamin C as 2 oranges, Vitamin B5 as 15 cups of broccoli, Vitamin B6 as 15 cups of spinach, Vitamin B12 as 7 cups of milk, and zinc as 3 cups...

The Kentucky Fried Buckquet, available between May 1 and May 3, 2022 to honor Mother's Day, isn't as cool as it sounds. Which is unfortunate, because it sounds awwwesommme...