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Sunday, May 19, 2013
$10.95 from Sam's Natural »

Application of Sam's Natural Down There Repair fixes two major male discomforts and social embarrassments: chafed crotch and smelly crotch. It can also be used preventatively, thwarting these afflictions from striking down...

Saturday, April 7, 2012
$189 from Wish.co.uk »

As if $80 Jessica Simpson shoes, $14,000 Victoria Beckham handbags, and $50 Adam Levine perfume weren't scary enough, now the mall, just like the bowling alley, has been overtaken by zombies. Your mission: kill them. Kill...

Wednesday, April 2, 2014
$49 - $99 from Pilot Study »

Grab your totem, but be forewarned: Inceptor the board game has as many layers as the Inception film it stemmed from. If you play it in subdued lighting with Hans Zimmer's soundtrack blaring through some surround-sound speakers, I'm sure the dream world's trippiness will present itself in equal proportions too....

Tuesday, March 18, 2014
$205.89 from Amazon »

The reduction of "Little" to "Lil" normally makes me cringe. It might be second only to shortening words with "y" or "ie", or adding the letters to the end of them. "Sammy" instead of "sandwich" is the worst offense. However...

Saturday, February 9, 2013
$29 from Wallet TrackR »

Just wait 'til the next dirty thief who tries to jack my wallet finds out I've got the Wallet TrackR. And a Sap Cap. And an extensive history of kicking people in the shins. About the size of a credit card and connected via...

Friday, August 15, 2014
$15 - $25 from Etsy »

Yes they're real beetle wings. From the iridescent Elytra Sternocera beetle of Thailand. Apparently beetlewing art is a traditional form of jewelry making once widely practiced throughout ancient Asia. And now widely practiced throughout the Internet. I think the effect is pretty cool. The earrings and necklaces are all dangly and Hypercolor-y. I bet if all ugly girls were required to wear beetlewing...

Thursday, July 11, 2013
$59.95 from Hibermate »

I love it when girls wear ear muffs. Especially big furry white ones. They give them that irresistible look of sophistication meets special needs kid. Ear muffs on guys, though? Eh. Not really acceptable. Maybe, maybe we can...

Sunday, January 6, 2013
$31.50 - $79.50 from Absinthes.com »

Sometimes it's fun to play mad scientist. Particularly when doing so involves hallucinogens. OK, so they removed the thujone component from absinthe, but still, 80% of any experience is perception, right? So if I think I'm...

Friday, February 7, 2014
$5,200 - $6,500 from Timbersled »

Timbersled does for dirt bikes what Track N Go does for trucks. Except I think Timbersled's intent is less to enable safe passage, work, and rescue operations during inclement weather than to enable sick motocross races and...

Saturday, February 23, 2013
$159.95 from Amazon »

Sweet, a onesie for temperatures even colder than my parents keep their house. Selk'bag's wearable sleeping bags cater to all outdoor enthusiasts looking to stay warm without the constriction of a traditional rectangular or...

Sunday, July 20, 2014
$14.95 from Amazon »

Another concoction from Drinkwel, makers of the multi-vitamin for drinkers, LyteShow seeks to expand its audience with this highly concentrated, rapid rehydration electrolyte formula. Don't worry, that doesn't mean hardcore...

Tuesday, November 5, 2013
$63.95 from Amazon »

I wish I had spring chicken status that would plant the original debut of the original Sega Genesis Console square before my time, but, sadly, it's a comeback whose initial rise to popularity I remember well. 1989 is back...

Saturday, September 21, 2013
$580 from UD Replicas »

If you prefer to be the villain, hold a special place in your heart for Bane and his anesthetic tarantula-mouth mask, or just don't feel ballsy enough to wear the molded leather chest plate, gauntlets, and butt huggers fashioned...

Friday, June 20, 2014
$1,399 - $1,599 from Etsy »

Are you more of an Autobot or a Decepticon? No, wait, let's back up. Are you more of a normal person or a gigantic geek? If the second, then please proceed with answering the first question. And regardless of what that answer...

Saturday, January 19, 2013
$13.72 from Amazon »

People think I drink only Kool-Aid and sodie pop because I'm immature and unrefined, but really it's because water is such a yawn. I need the excitement and intrigue of carbonation and colors insulting to nature in my beverages....

Saturday, July 28, 2012
$179.95 from WickedLasers.com »

It's the 21st century. Who buys a flashlight whose only capability is to shed light anymore? When I'm looking for my 1:12 scale Voltron in the attic, hunting zombies in the Ozarks, or self-examining my throat for the white...

Saturday, August 11, 2012
$39.99 from ThinkGeek »

This anatomical view of what lies beyond the high fructose corn syrup and Yellow Dye No. 5 of their epidermises paints Gummi Bears in a new light. Gives them some identity. Some humanity. Makes me feel kind of bad for eating...

Sunday, January 20, 2013
$79.99 - $119.99 from Amazon »

When I feel a tinge of pain during my engagement in taxing pursuits of physical prowess, such as owning the squash court and attending Zumba classes, I calmly remove myself from the action--no matter how many feisty Latinas...

Saturday, March 8, 2014

What we are looking at here is either a bit of a hyperbole or the wine version of that lady who tamed Helen Keller and taught her to communicate. It's called the Miracle Machine. It asserts itself as the world's first affordable...

Monday, May 26, 2014

Snap up the iPhoneography lens kit, your 10-piece ticket to rocking Instagram with enhanced iPhone 5S/5 photography skills. It makes an appearance on Dude Exclusives at 65% off retail value through May 29, 2014. Also keep...

Monday, June 24, 2013
$115 - $125 from JumpStartCity »

The only not titanium components in Brian Fellhoelter's TiBolt bolt action pen are the the ink cartridge, spring, O-ring, and stylus nib. It's kind of like how the only not titanium components in my rock hard body are my blood...

OMG
Saturday, August 27, 2011
By: Hilton

Amazing restaurant / hotel suite under the crystal clear waters of the Indian Ocean off the coast of the Maldives. Is there a cooler hotel room in the world? No. The answer is no....

Wednesday, July 16, 2014
$44.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Get the XiStera 8-in-1 iPhone Multitool for 35% off its retail price of $70. Just $44.99 from the Dude Exclusives online store for a limited time....

Wednesday, January 15, 2014
$55 from Ellusionist »

You know who loves magic tricks? Kids. You know who else loves magic tricks? Hopefully all the women I invite home for a night of fine 7-layer dip and shots of Sauza Silver after I show them my magic trick....

Saturday, February 15, 2014
$1,999 - $2,198 from USU »

The Urban Storage Unit, or USU (pronounced "oooh-sue"), provides up to 1,000 pounds worth of additional storage for people with assigned parking spots in apartment and condominium complexes. Uh, high-end apartment and condominium...

Friday, February 14, 2014
$11.90 from Amazon »

Black like my ex's heart, and black like the magic I'm going to use to make her rue the day she left me crushed and dejected inside a four square. Anyone who wants to know what's wrong with me, here's your answer: 1) Julie...

Monday, May 20, 2013
$165 from Kinekt »

Kinekt's Gear Ring reminds me of that ditty "The Wheels on the Bus" except, unlike the song, the ring has a fully integrated design of micro-precision, stainless steel gears instead of rubber tires that go round and round...

Sunday, August 18, 2013
$29 from Amazon »

If you just want people to keep the F out, get an Add-a-Lock. But if you want them to believe for a split second that they have successfully encroached your space, only to disrupt the blaze of an invisble light that in turn...

Thursday, October 31, 2013
$16 from Amazon »

The Married Kama Sutra: The World's Least Erotic Sex Manual extols both the wild and nuanced interactions of married life, and categorizes them--with illustrations--into the next echelon of the ancient Indian guide to mind-blowing...

Thursday, February 28, 2013

In case there was any confusion, Poundtown Condom vendor Say It with a Condom specifies this particular latex shroud is for "anyone who's a Poundtown regular, or is coming for the first time." Haha, get it? There are, like...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
$13,500 from Etsy »

My theory is that this might actually be Optimus Prime and this guy has captured him, found some way of disarming him, and is now trying to sell him. I don't know if I'd be comfortable sleeping with this guy roaming around...

Tuesday, June 24, 2014
$38.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Get the iStabilizer Dolly and create cinematic videos and panning shots with your smartphone! Offered as a Dude Exclusive for 40% off for a limited time!...

Monday, August 12, 2013
Sold Out from Citizen Brick »

Would LEGO ever produce and release a Breaking Bad Meth Lab? Probably not even if its CEO and Board of Directors were all required to inadvertently step on an errant brick once an hour, every hour of the day, every day for...

Wednesday, July 18, 2012
$10.97 from Amazon »

Dude Wipes: A Brief Overview of Audience and Application. Dude Wipes are for dudes. And every once in while--say, every 18 to 24 hours--dudes tend to have an especially...explosive...encounter with the bathroom. The kind of...

Sunday, August 14, 2011
$365.99 from ThinkGeek »

This is one of the coolest products we've come across in a long time. These are real damn jellyfish swimming around in your house. This is a very legitimate site and has a solution for all budgets....

Monday, September 23, 2013
$11.19 from Amazon »

So they're selling air. And not even the far-out air that's been solidified into Aerogel, or the air sucked up by Mega Maid and officially licensed by Spaceball One, just plain old gaseous oxygen. In a can. Oh it's a fancy...

Saturday, July 19, 2014
$110.76 from Amazon »

I guess FINIS' Neptune underwater bone conduction MP3 player is geared toward swimmers, but if I had one I'd probably wear it along with my lifejacket anytime I went on a boat too. Because what's worse than falling overboard...

Wednesday, July 16, 2014
$39.97 from Amazon »

Vampire Professional Tools, first of Vampliers screw pliers and now of the Super Combo Scissors, should have hired the same person to name the latter who they did to coin the former. Or they should have hired me. I would have...

Friday, October 18, 2013
Giveaway: Rattlerstrap Venom - Paracord Belt 92
Giveaway Entry Is Closed

It's a Dude first. Rattlerstrap has designed the Venom, a limited edition paracord belt, just for our reader giveaway. Which means the winner will be the first--and one of the only--marines, bush pilots, hunting guides, photographers...

Friday, February 28, 2014
$49.99 from ThinkGeek »

Did you ever know a kid growing up who had, like, full-size Pac-Man and Mortal Kombat arcade games in his basement? You know, the "rich kid"? Boys would go over en masse for tournaments after school and his mom would bring...

Thursday, June 6, 2013
$429 from Virtuix »

Full-body immersion into the world of virtual reality gaming, with a side of actual reality exercise. The Omni isn't the first VR treadmill we've seen (check out the WizDish) but it appears to be the most sophisticated, nicest...

Friday, August 1, 2014
$129.99 from Amazon »

Big Brothering and doing home things when you're not at home now extends to the kitchen with this collaboration between the Kleenex of slow cookers, Crock-Pot, and the June Cleaver of home automation, Belkin. The Crock-Pot...

Sunday, November 17, 2013
$678.88 from Amazon »

The Junior Devastator is an 80-shot rubber band gatling gun that "sprays rubber bands like a hose sprays water." Two points on that. 1) I wonder what Daddy Devastator looks like. 2) The JD is the third, and probably the most...

Thursday, July 24, 2014
$13.09 from Amazon »

Welcome to my couch. It's a privilege to be your host for the evening. Please sign in here so I'll have a record of your attendance...other than the ass print you'll leave behind...in the coming years. Can I get you anything?...

Thursday, March 13, 2014
$99 - $249 from Pro-Defense »

Designed originally for law enforcement and military use, Pro-Defense calls their F4 Tactical rail-mounted pepper spray the non-lethal alternative. Which I take to mean getting hit by a solid stream of it is still going to...

Friday, October 4, 2013
$59.95 from XYZbot »

In the grand spirit of rubber band guns--and according to Rubber Band Machine Gun creator XYZbot, there is indeed a grand spirit and subculture of rubber band guns in Japan--we present your favorite organization, binding...

Friday, May 18, 2012
$199.99 from ThinkGeek »

Robert Downey Jr. is almost as cool as Tony Stark, and the fact that RDJ is wearing the Iron Man Magtitan New Legend Power Bands while playing Tony Stark in the new Avengers movie, and the Power Bands ThinkGeek is selling...

Monday, April 14, 2014
$185 from BaseCampX »

I can't figure out why this slingshot is so expensive. It must be the one David used to slay Goliath. Alright then, give me a rock and a pair of eyeballs...and $200, Mama...and I'll see what I can do....

Wednesday, October 24, 2012
$9.22 from Amazon »

One way to make others jump out of their skin is to jump out of yours. This Unzipped Flesh look requires some legwork and talent to pull off, but look at the striking levels of gruesomeness and morbidity one can achieve from...

Thursday, May 29, 2014
$12.18 from Amazon »

Need to cover your crack? Driveway Medic says it will prevail where liquid crack filler falters. A roll of self-adhesive asphalt repair fabric, the patcher applies in seconds via a simple peel-and-stick method, covering, sealing...

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

I'm afraid online ordering options for the cyborg flesh treatment have yet to make it to Amazon. In fact, should you want an anatomical anomaly tattoo so whiplash-inducingly realistic and infatuating it gets mistaken for professionally...

Sunday, June 3, 2012
$3,300 from Bionic Concepts »

JP Rishea masterminds a legion of sick conglomerations of metal and power, but the Exo-Gauntlet is probably his most irrationally needful of them all. I guess one could technically argue that it has a few practical applications...

Thursday, December 5, 2013

I would call Belcampo's Bacons of the World quarterly sampler pork crack, but in this case, I think it would allude to an entirely different--yet still likely very tasty--part of the pig, rather than the addictive, euphoria-inducing...

Saturday, February 1, 2014
$85.80 from Amazon »

In many ways, this NOMIS Piggyback Rider for kids up to 7 years old! is a total crock. If I have to walk 18 blocks from where we parked to the PAX entrance, why should whiny little punk Treyton get to hitch a ride on his dad's...

Thursday, May 8, 2014
$19.99 from ThinkGeek »

Like Food Huggers, Cover Blubbers are condom-ish pieces of sticky rubber that fit directly over leftovers for preservation and storage. Kind of like plastic wrap or foil, except Cover Blubbers actually adhere and stay put...

Saturday, April 12, 2014

What's so special about an "atomic" wristwatch paradoxically struggling to work itself down from prototype sizes as big as the wearer's wrist? Well. In tracking time, it loses just 1 second every 1,000 years. Because its foundation...

Sunday, May 6, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

He is the first Avenger. An unparalleled patriot whose loyalty, stealth, and shredded abs have kept America safe from the likes of Doctor Faustus, Viper, and HYDRA since 1941. And now, motorcycle-riding superhero devotees...

Friday, September 13, 2013
$58.99 from Amazon »

Shine and its 24K Gold rolling papers add a new action to the ever-growing list of Things You Can Do with Gold. Currently populated by: 1) Eat it; 2) Shit it; and 3) Buy expensive things with it, stoners and recreational tokers...

Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Discontinued

No pen.... No write.... No sign! No sign! The Fratelis forgot to check Mikey's marble bag! I can't tell...if it's an "A sharp" or if it's a "B flat!! Come on Andy, if you hit the wrong note they'll all "B flat"! The Goonies'...

Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Wheelman on the street. Wheelman on the grass. Wheelman on the beach. Wheelman past the Pee-wee Herman-clad cyclists at a whopping 26 mph. Oh what's that, padded spandex ass? Yeah, my speed is generated by a 50cc 2-stroke...

Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

As much as I miss these simpler days on the ski slopes, I think I'd rather move forward with Oakley's Airwave HUD & GPS goggles than don my pink & purple snowsuit and man perm to travel back in time. Though you'll pay dearly...

Sunday, March 16, 2014
$21.17 from Amazon »

Not so scary when you're splayed across my coffee table in 20 detachable organs and body parts, are you Jaws? Ow! F- OK, fine. Teeth still sharp in 13" long 4D model. Shark still mildly intimidating....

Friday, July 27, 2012
$19.99 from Amazon »

Great. Something to make the guy in the cube next to me even more hyperactive and annoying. I wonder how fast he'll be able to recite all the state capitols after chugging 32 ounces of the world's strongest coffee. Death Wish...

Friday, March 14, 2014
Sold Out from Amazon »

It's almost spring! Only...I don't know, however many days until the first day of spring...days away. What am I, a meteorologist? I'm 80% sure it happens sometime this month. And that means it's time to plant your garden....

Wednesday, April 9, 2014
$149.99 from ThinkGeek »

The Scottevest SeV Sterling jacket has 24 interior pockets. 24! That means it can hold my wallet (condoms), water bottle (lube), iPad (In Diana Jones and the Temple Poon DVD), sunglasses (vibrator), Bluetooth headset (butt...

Saturday, August 30, 2014
$145 from Etsy »

Bag End has had a long and distinguished life. First the hobbit-hole served as home to Bilbo Baggins. Then Frodo. Then Sam and Rosie and however many generations of Gamgees plowed on in the Hobbiton after them. And now, thanks...

Saturday, November 3, 2012
By: Fanstudio

"Simplicity is resolved complexity." So says architect, designer, sculptor, and creator of the Zero Day Bed, Jorge Goval. The indoor-outdoor lounger and sleeper subscribes to nature's tropism phenomenon--the adaptive movements...

Sunday, January 5, 2014
$15k from indiegogo »

Remember the Cocoon 1, a means for people to leave the bubble of their computer screens and living rooms, and enter a bubble plopped down in the middle of a park or the general admission area of the next Slipknot show? Now...