Cold Steel War Hammer

$47.99 from Amazon »

The Cold Steel War Hammer is for striking, piercing, crushing, and bludgeoning opponents. Hopefully opponents that are, say, drywalls scheduled for demo and sides of beef purchased from your local farmer's market, not...

Long Piropiro Lung Exercise Tool

Hey it's a kazoo or a, uh, unraveling blowy thing the kiddos and incredibly irritating adults blow into to unravel at birthdays and New Year's. But this blow thing has taken on a new disguise: from party supply to exercise...

Solar Window Charger

$23.99 from Amazon »

This solar powered window charger reminds me of the Winbot window-washing robot, except that it doesn't move around your windows and clean them, it just sits there soaking up the sun and converting its mighty power to...

Runnur Hands Free Carry-All

$55 from Amazon »

The Hands Free Carry-All. It's like Chewbacca's bandolier meets Alan's satchel...but neither as sweet as the former nor as wholly emasculating as the latter. Runnur's shoulder-slung essentials tote somehow neutralizes...

Privacy Pop Bed Tent

$104.99 - $149.99 from Amazon »

It's about that time of year. The time that anyone with a new roommate starts to assess exactly how he or she feels about said roommate. Best bud, mortal enemy, tolerable nuisance, unfortunate insertion into the human...

Dolfi Ultrasonic Clothes Washer

$99 - $109 from Dolfi »

Ultrasonic technology is already used in consumer products such as humidifiers and jewelry cleaners, plus commercial electronics that sanitize the likes of medical and dental equipment, so all Dolfi is really doing here...

Bulletproof Polo Shirt

$3,475 from Fresh Polos »

If the acute fear of being assassinated on the golf course has kept you from swinging your 9-iron too many times to count, welcome to the start of the rest of your life. Breezy, bulletproof, and cleared for the country...

Heat Sensitive Tile

$33 from Moving Color »

I thought the Heat Sensitive Table was the pinnacle of cool in the realm of thermochromatic commmodities, but this Heat Sensitive Tile has just upped the ante. Inspired by the stunning lights of Alaska, Moving Color's...

HUBOPTIC Equalizer Masks

$69 - $385 from Jorge Pong »

HUBOPTIC creator Jorge Pong has a few ideas for your next DJing gig. Or EDM show. Or killer robot with a soft spot for a heavy bass line costume. His electroluminescent equalizer masks come in both half- and full-face...

Halfpops - Half-popped Popcorn

$23.84 from Amazon »

Halfpops are the Hans & Franz of popcorn. Where sissy girly men might eat airy, puffy, pouf clouds for snacks, real Alphas eat Halfpops. Halfpops take your regular popcorn kernels and [clap] pump them up. Less popping...

Dragon Hoodie

$447 from Canada Cosplay »

I like it when objects can wholly encompass their descriptors both literally and figuratively. For example, previously dragons were hot due solely to their deadly breath of fire. But then Canada Cosplay decided to turn...

Tesla Coil

I don't know if a 50,000-volt Tesla coil is powerful enough to play a tag team rendition of "Sweet Home Alabama" like the pair in the above video, but it does radiate enough high-frequency energy to light 2 fluorescent...

Geochron World Map & 24-Hour Clock

$1,795 - $4,295 from Geochron »

The Geochron is one of the coolest maps I ever saw. Not only is it all big and backlit, but the map itself is a conveyor belt driven left to right in sync with the earth's rotation. So at any given time the Geochron and...

Magnetic Dumbbells

Are you stronger than electromagnetism? O2 Magnetic Dumbbells, a pair of rings with embedded electromagnets, work in tandem to generate resistance as their ends repel, and challenge users to build muscle by fighting their...

Osteoid - 3D Printed Ultrasound Cast

Great. Now kids are going to start breaking one another's arms just so they can get a sick 3D-printed cast with attached bone stimulator to set and heal it. I mean, that's what I'd do if I were a kid. OK, maybe with a...

Leatherman Mut Multitool

$132 from Amazon »

I was just sitting here picking my nose and it dawned on me: human hands are the original multi-tool. Then I started thinking about all of the varied tasks they can perform in their host of contortions, nose picking...

SureFire WristLight Watch & Flashlight

$1,431 from Amazon »

SureFire's 2211 is a variable-output LED WristLight. That means it won't just illuminate the time as you walk home from your one night stand, but will also alight the entire path in front of you as you stroll it (or skip...

LifeStraw Personal Water Filter

$15.99 from Amazon »

LifeStraw, a Time Magazine Invention of the Year Winner, removes a minimum of 99.9999% of waterborne bacteria. In areas plagued with dirty and unsafe drinking water, it filters up to 1,000 liters per apparatus into potable...

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The Man Ring

Giveaway: The Man Ring

Complement your fine motor exploits and turn Ringman into a finger-sized MacGyver! Enter to win the sleek and stealthy multi-tool Man Ring from Boone Rings (a $385 value)!...

Grill It Stove Top Grill

$23.99 from Amazon »

Here's a grill for the inside, which is probably more pleasant to use this time of year than a grill for the outside. And it doesn't take up a fat wad of space, instead installing over a single burner on your range. And...

Breaking Bad Methopoly

Discontinued

Joanne Silverman loves meth. Just kidding. She loves Breaking Bad. I mean, I guess she might love meth too, but probably not because if she did it is unlikely she would have the wherewithal to conceive and create this...

Magneto-Grade Neodymium Magnets

$5.86 from Amazon »

I'm sure there are stronger magnets out there, but these tiny, 1/2" x 1/8" neodymium discs carry instructions to keep them away from children and not to use them as toys, so I'd say they have some pretty serious sucking...

Venom Mask

$694.95 from Composite Effects »

At first I just thought this Venom mask was realistic-looking in a cool way. Then I watched the video of the guy silently barking and growling with it on, and I still think it's realistic-looking. In a way that indicates...

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Fidget Rings

Giveaway: Fidget Rings

By: Fidget »

Maybe you fidget because you're anxious. Because you're bored. Because you have ADHD. Because you're 5 minutes away from walking into the biggest interview of your life. Because you just drank 11 cups of coffee. Now fidgeters...

Keyport Slide 2.0

$59.95 from Amazon »

The Keyport Slide 2.0 masters the art of consolidation. Consolidation. I like that word. It conjures images of culling junk, making things tidier, increasing manageability and pleasantness. Even when I'm told that we...

Size Matters Cake Plate

$32.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Now you can have your cake and...measure it with a protractor too. This Size Matters plate is perfect for parents looking both to stick it to siblings warring over whose piece of devil's food is bigger, and make the kids...

DIY Internal Combustion Engine

$35.37 from Amazon »

I couldn't feature the time lapse video of a guy constructing this Haynes DIY internal combustion engine because the 225 bpm Looney Tunes music playing throughout his process started giving me heart palpitations after...

Fiber Optics Bedspread

$485 from LumiGram »

How do you say Shazaaam! in the interior decorating world? I bet my mama wouldn't get so mad at my dad for wanting to put the electric blanket on the bed starting around September 15th every year if their electric blanket...

Movie Quality Zombie Costume

$299.99 from The Horror Dome »

True, this walking dead costume doesn't look precisely like the Walking Dead costumes set to lumber across your TV screen tonight, but The Horror Dome's version is still pretty convincing with its movie quality gore and...

Power Box Pedal Generator

$195 from Amazon »

Anyone who launches into a rant about sh*tty chargers and backup batteries that have a mere 9000mAh capacity should be required to re-power his or her dead smartphone with his or her own two feet. So should anyone who...

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Tire Tread Rings

Giveaway: Tire Tread Rings

In collaboration with the ring masters at Titanium Buzz, we're rolling out one lucky reader's choice of any ring from Titanium Buzz's Tire Tread series valued at $400 or less. Enter using the quick and easy form at the...

Bulk Wrestling Jello

$119 from Amazon »

I was just thinking the other day that I could stand for a good round of co-ed jello wrestling. But when I started doing the calculations to figure out how many boxes of gelatin-forming strawberry granules I'd need to...

The World's Most Powerful Flashlight

$179.95 from WickedLasers.com »

It's the 21st century. Who buys a flashlight whose only capability is to shed light anymore? When I'm looking for my 1:12 scale Voltron in the attic, hunting zombies in the Ozarks, or self-examining my throat for the...

The McGurk Effect

Sensory overload phenomenon demonstrated by a creepy bearded man and a sweet voiced English woman. I can't imagine watching this while high. I feel like it would turn into a scene from Tommy Boy....

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The 5 Senses Mystery Box

Giveaway: The 5 Senses Mystery Box

Do you hear what I hear? See the light? Smell what I'm cookin'? Taste the rainbow? Feel the touch of cotton, the fabric of our lives? You can if you click here and enter to win The 5 Senses Mystery Box. You won't find...

AirType Keyless Keyboard

First of all, kudos to the AirType marketing team for making one of the few product promo videos I have not had to fast-forward at least 3 times while watching. Anyone who wants a clever and brief rundown of this swell...

Sand-Free Beach Mat

$34.95 - $99.95 from Amazon »

I would like it very much if CGear's Sand-Free Multimat stayed sand-free by emitting an invisible dome barrier that repelled...no, forcefully rejected all granular compounds...and children...that got within a foot of...

Firebox 5" Folding Campfire Stove

$67.98 from Amazon »

From minimalist survival treks to broke down cars in the middle of nowhere to the squirrel I took out with my Big Bore blowgun that my mama won't let me cook up in her house, Firebox's 5" Folding Campfire Stove will provide...

Enchanted Forest: An Inky Quest & Coloring Book

$10.02 from Amazon »

Enchanted Forest: An Inky Quest & Coloring Book is kind of like The Legend of Zelda in that you collect trinkets and clues along the way to help you reach the castle and discover the secret it holds at the end of your...

Damascus Dragon Gyuto Chef Knife

$119.37 from Amazon »

I don't chop onions or slice cucumbers, I slay them with a 67-layer damascus dragon pattern! This Japanese stainless steel knife is super sharp and clad in everyone's favorite hip-yet-medieval-sounding steel: damascus....

SilverAir Anti-Odor Performance Clothing

$16 - $64 from Y Athletics »

Y Athletics weaves pure silver into the fabrics of their SilverAir line of performance gear to form an ionic shield against odor. They say the result is not only effective, but designed to fight odor naturally throughout...

Hamster-Powered Strandbeest

By: CrabFu »

Welcome to the world of I-Wei Huang. Artist. Animator. Tinkerer. Maker of hamster-powered Strandbeest. Strandbeest, if you aren't familiar with the term, are the walking brainchildren of Dutch artist Theo Jansen. In full...

Glowring Tritium Keychain

$20.70 from Amazon »

In many senses, Glowrings have nothing on the tritium keychains we previously showed you--the ones super-sickly designed and flawlessly handmade by a dude who goes by the name of iknitsteel (though I think his mama calls...

Lace Skull & Crossbones Pants

$218 from Amazon »

Plea to All Women: I implore you to buy these pants. And wear them in my presence. White, lace, skulls. They're the trifecta of my fantasies. Throw in flowing, partially see-through, and looking to be very soft, and I...

MacGyver Toolkit

Discontinued

What's not included in the MacGyver Toolkit? According to iFixit, nothing but the mullet. For those of you too young to remember Angus MacGyver, here is what this pocket-sized secret agent's Altoids tin will get you one...

Freakshop Belt Buckles

$45 - $190 from Etsy »

Some days I wake up and long to give people the impression that I'm a dark and bluesy heavy metal rocker with an impossibly angular jawline. So I wear my Danzig horned or Misfits shadowy skull belt buckle. Other days...

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Ellusionist Pure Smoke Magic Bundle

Giveaway: Ellusionist Pure Smoke Magic Bundle

Enter to win a bag of magician's tricks from online masters of the game, Ellusionist! The Pure Smoke Giveaway Magic Bundle includes 1 unit of Pure Smoke, a set of Messado Rings, a Shift Self-Bending Paperclip, and a deck...

Metal Core Door Decals

$79.95 from Gadgets and Gear »

Oooh, I don't need a game controller or a code or critical thinking skills to open these metal core doors. I might even be able to kick them in without risk of shattering multiple bones in my foot. Probably I'd just jam...

Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers

$12.95 from Amazon »

At printing, Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers had 14 reviews on Amazon, and every single one of them contained both a serious critical analysis of the product's smell-quelling efficacy, and an insightful comment...

SelectaDNA Human Marking & Tracking Guns

Genetics always triumph in the end. In the case of the SelectaDNA High Velocity DNA Tagging System, pellet-sized building blocks of life fire from either a pistol or a rifle at a target up to 100 to 130 feet away--typically...

Subwing - Underwater Hang Glider

$490 - $895 from Subwing »

You know those dreams you have when you're flying, spinning, disoriented, or drowning? They're all about to come true. At once. The SUBWING underwater glider attaches to a rope and boat at one end, and your death grip...

Podtime Sleeping Pods

$2,165.09 from Firebox.com »

When I look at Podtime's new collapsible Sleeping Pod, an extra cozy 3.9' wide x 6.9' long personal retreat and slumbering space for college students, or anyone else on a crusade to find efficient luxury, exactly two...

Izon View Security Camera

$79.95 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Keep your "Izon" your home, baby, pet, or office with this live streaming surveillance camera. The Izon View sets up simply and sits inconspicuously on any flat surface to help you monitor what's important to you no matter...

Bodily Candles

$29.69 from Firebox.com »

Been looking for some tabletop art to spruce up the living room? How's about a pair of candles made from the ears of Sloth and the mouth of the fat lady's face Arnold wore in Total Recall? These odd waxen pieces, called...

Executive Knight Pen Holder

$29.99 from ThinkGeek »

Your Paper Mate Fine Point Rollerball, my Lord. Yeah. That's how all men of my stature should be handed their pens. Though maybe I would have my bowing-in-reverence Executive Knight hold an UZI Defender tactical model...

The Peacemaker - Nightstick Stun Gun

$37.95 from Amazon »

Peacemaker sounds noble. Civil. The Ned Stark approach. Which also connotes decapitation of he who bears the peace. When we're discussing a nightstick charged with 6,000,000 volts of blood-buzzing electricity, Peaceforcer...

LED Eyelashes

These are aptly named. An ingenious piece of technology wrought from Asian women's desire to have larger eyes, these seem more fit for the drug-and-urine-splattered concrete floor of the next rave in Omaha, Nebraska....

Unicorn in a Narwhal Sculpture

$1,500 from Kozyndan »

Holy crap, it's fantastical beast overload! It almost hurts to look at it, it's so stirring and extraordinary. And, according to the unicornarwhal sculpture's creators, it also explains a lot. How can a whale with a ginormous...

Keypad Fix Remote Control Reviver

$4.95 from Amazon »

Now this looks like a fun project for a Wednesday night. Gather up all of the remote controls with buttons to which I must apply approximately 18 kilonewtons of force* to get to work, and fix them with some goo that looks...

Flare Super Efficient Rocket Science Pans

$32 - $125 from Lakeland »

Thomas Povey is a rocket scientist at Oxford University. But when he's not applying his thermodynamics expertise to advanced jet engines, he kicks back and thinks about how it might enable him to fry his eggs and blood...

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Lukas Car Dash Camera with GPS

Giveaway: Lukas Car Dash Camera with GPS

By: SpyTec »

No more he said, she said during fender benders. No more hit and runs. And no more friends calling BS when you tell them about the Jetta full of college cheerleaders who turned around and flashed you at a stoplight. ...

Animated Ugly Christmas Sweaters

$54.95 - $64.95 from Amazon »

I see your ugly Shhh!-ing Santa Christmas sweater, and raise you an ugly Shhh!-ing Santa Christmas sweater with animated eyes bouncing lecherously to and fro as if he were watching a naked lady elf tossing relay and entreating...

Big Red Button Rage Relief Device

$14.99 from ThinkGeek »

It doesn't connect to an ejection seat or the trap door above a tank swarming with electric eels and Mariah Carey after a 3-day fast, but the Big Red Button rage relief device does provide considerable catharsis for the...

9mm Vodka

Who wants to be on the receiving end of a shot from a 9mm submachine gun? What if the shot came in a glass and made you feel weak-in-the-knees gooooood instead of weak-in-the-knees punctured in a vital organ? 9mm Vodka...

Ninja Sphere Environment Controller

$225 - $575 from NinjaBlocks »

The next generation of Ninja Blocks, a hackable tech warrior system enabling users to monitor and control their households from afar, has removed all right angles, increased its functionality, and gone balls to the wall...

StormFly - PC for Your Wrist

A PC for your wrist. A Cloud bracelet. An unassuming, yet hi-tech piece of jewelry called StormFly. With a much bigger emphasis on the hi-tech than the jewelry part. The StormFly is a self-proclaimed Ludicrous Speed storage...