A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Saturday, August 27, 2011
By: Hilton

Amazing restaurant / hotel suite under the crystal clear waters of the Indian Ocean off the coast of the Maldives. Is there a cooler hotel room in the world? No. The answer is no....

Saturday, July 21, 2012
Discontinued

FLASHr debuts on Kickstarter as New Orleans boys Trey DeArk and Terence Green's slick reappropriation of the iPhone's built-in LED camera flash and iOS' "LED Flash Alerts". A 3-part, multi-colored case, FLASHr intertwines...

Wednesday, July 17, 2013
$106.47 - $152.13 from Steakstones »

SteakStones are really just a way for people who are lazy or lousy cooks to host a dinner party without going to too much trouble or F'ing everything up. That being said, SteakStones still look awesomely rad and radly awesome and also badass. A blazing hot slab of hardened lava and a raw hunk of beef set before me with bowls full of sauces and seasonings and the command, "Go for it"? Well, OK...

Friday, June 20, 2014
$99.21 from Amazon »

Mmm, forget the carbonated lager water, I'd like to pour one of those mocha porters into Kirin Ichiban's beer slushie machine. Caffeinated, drunk, and refreshed by hi-tech Japanese head: yes, that is exactly how I want to...

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Get your NODE+, a highly versatile and customizable sensor, for a very limited time at $20 off retail value from the Dude Exclusives online store!...

Thursday, October 9, 2014
$104.99 from Amazon »

The U.S. Coast Guard-approved Onyx A/M-24 automatic flotation vest. For kayaking. For boating. For fishing. Definitely for the airplane. Psssh! Let all the other lemmings scramble to get their inflatable life vests and seat flotation devices in order when the mass chaos of a rapid descent breaks out. I'll be chillin' first in line to jump with my Onyx and SOS Parachute already preloaded....

Saturday, April 7, 2012
$189 from Wish.co.uk »

As if $80 Jessica Simpson shoes, $14,000 Victoria Beckham handbags, and $50 Adam Levine perfume weren't scary enough, now the mall, just like the bowling alley, has been overtaken by zombies. Your mission: kill them. Kill...

Saturday, August 16, 2014
$3.99 from Amazon »

Don't want to wait 19 months, or whatever the current ETA for Bunch O Balloons is? Get an instant water balloon fix with ZORBZ latex bombs. You won't be able to pump up 3 dozen of them at once, but the balloons' self-sealing...

Friday, January 31, 2014
$12,460 from L'ArcoBaleno »

Before you even say it, I agree. $12 grand for the M8, Ron Gilad's "little burly imp" in his IX Mirrors Series?! That's ridiculous! You could make almost the same mirror for a fraction of the cost! Like I said, I agree. So...uh...who...

Sunday, January 6, 2013
$31.50 - $79.50 from Absinthes.com »

Sometimes it's fun to play mad scientist. Particularly when doing so involves hallucinogens. OK, so they removed the thujone component from absinthe, but still, 80% of any experience is perception, right? So if I think I'm...

Tuesday, April 30, 2013
$849.99 from Amazon »

The 6' x 18' WaterMat is bigger than most rafts, more portable than most rafts, and won't suck so much air from your lungs during assembly that you start to feel lightheaded and then pass out and then fall off the side of...

Wednesday, April 30, 2014
$400 from Mellow »

Mellow is about to make it a little easier for the average person to cook all fancy and pretentious. Wi-Fi connected and app-controlled, the forthcoming sous-vide machine will allow users to dump in a bag of uncooked grub...

Friday, March 7, 2014
$2,995 - $3,200 from Zane Wylie »

When Zane Wylie was 5 his mom gave him a canister of Play-Doh and Zane Wylie ate it. When Zane Wylie was 8 his mom gave him a pack of colored pencils and a spiral sketch book and Zane Wylie traded the pencils for a couple...

Wednesday, May 29, 2013
$29.99 from ThinkGeek »

While I do not believe in buying other people gifts in honor of holidays for which they do not also have to buy me a gift, Father's Day is on the horizon, and this Tactical BBQ Apron could perhaps serve the dual purpose of...

Saturday, February 23, 2013
$18.49 from Amazon »

When you're sittin' on the john and the toilet paper's gone, be a man, use your hand...or get some Shittens. Protecting ourselves from fecal matter should be a priority right up there with wearing sunscreen and planning for...

Monday, July 21, 2014
$193.95 from Amazon »

What would be really great is if they could add a foot rest and a reclining seat to this Cumberland inflatable fishing float tube. That way at least I could take a nap while I'm waiting all day long to not get so much as a...

Wednesday, July 9, 2014
$12.95 - $26.95 from Inspiring Jewelry »

Acrylic and mirror plastic are laser cut into comic book, gaming, and TV series favorites in these swell shiny necklaces. The danglers come as both singles and Friendship doubles--2 chains holding halves of the same image...

Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Sold Out from Amazon »

If I yank my headphones out of my ears one more time while doing burpees...or gesturing wildly at a car that doesn't heed the pedestrian right of way at a crosswalk...I'm going to Rumpelstiltskin them to smithereens!...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
$17k from Etsy »

My theory is that this might actually be Optimus Prime and this guy has captured him, found some way of disarming him, and is now trying to sell him. I don't know if I'd be comfortable sleeping with this guy roaming around...

Thursday, November 28, 2013
$399 from indiegogo »

Now, is the Passages the kind of Shatner watch that can command an Enterprise, or the kind of Shatner watch that encourages you to name the price you'll pay for it, and if there are any left in stock, it's yours? Well, maybe...

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Cecilia Carey (set and costume designer) and Harry Parr ("architectural foodsmith") obviously got pregnant and high respectively and were like, "What would be the best thing ever right now?" Their conclusion, reached simultaneously:...

Tuesday, September 10, 2013
$907 from Amazon »

What makes a duffel bag a beast? Bigness. Ruggedness. Resilience. What makes a duffel bag The Beast? According to Saddleback Leather, all of the above, plus a 100-year warranty (yes, that's one hundred), a mere 3 seams binding...

Saturday, February 9, 2013
$29 from Wallet TrackR »

Just wait 'til the next dirty thief who tries to jack my wallet finds out I've got the Wallet TrackR. And a Sap Cap. And an extensive history of kicking people in the shins. About the size of a credit card and connected via...

Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I think metal is OK, and I think liquid is OK, but for some reason if you put them together, "OK" turns into SO FUCKING RAD. (Huh. I just realized I feel similarly about vodka and this girl Karin I know). And when it comes...

Thursday, January 23, 2014
$7.04 from Amazon »

Ladies and gentlemen, this is how they do it. This is how they ignite the Olympic torch, match- and lighter-free. This is also how you can start lighting your campfires, cigarettes, cigars, incense cones, and in the great...

Tuesday, June 18, 2013
$1,500 - $2k from LiveMap »

Though specifically in development for use on a motorcycle, I'd probably wear the LiveMap helmet while driving and walking as well. Its built-in navigation system and voice-controlled interface allow those rolling 'round the...

Monday, May 20, 2013
$165 from Kinekt »

Kinekt's Gear Ring reminds me of that ditty "The Wheels on the Bus" except, unlike the song, the ring has a fully integrated design of micro-precision, stainless steel gears instead of rubber tires that go round and round...

Monday, August 12, 2013
Sold Out from Citizen Brick »

Would LEGO ever produce and release a Breaking Bad Meth Lab? Probably not even if its CEO and Board of Directors were all required to inadvertently step on an errant brick once an hour, every hour of the day, every day for...

Thursday, July 11, 2013
$59.95 from Hibermate »

I love it when girls wear ear muffs. Especially big furry white ones. They give them that irresistible look of sophistication meets special needs kid. Ear muffs on guys, though? Eh. Not really acceptable. Maybe, maybe we can...

Sunday, June 1, 2014
$11.79 from Energy Shisha »

While drinking coffee in public isn't forbidden...yet...with the recent boom in vaporizer popularity, it's not surprising that caffeine has hopped inside the barrel too. Energy Shisha is an electronic vapor pen that outputs...

Sunday, May 19, 2013
$10.95 from Sam's Natural »

Application of Sam's Natural Down There Repair fixes two major male discomforts and social embarrassments: chafed crotch and smelly crotch. It can also be used preventatively, thwarting these afflictions from striking down...

Thursday, March 7, 2013
$32.93 from Amazon »

5 minutes to a breakfast sandwich. No drive-thru on earth can beat that...mainly because of the whole leaving the house and driving to the drive-thru portion of the equation. Otherwise I guess most of them could. If there...

Wednesday, May 7, 2014
$269 from Umberto Luce »

Umberto Luce makes fancy man boots that somehow avert the designation fancyman boots. One of their latest releases, the Peepems, combine 100% vegetable-tanned cowhide on the outside with a 100% bovine interior lining and a...

Thursday, August 21, 2014
$39.99 - $122.85 from Amazon »

While SteelBell creator Hyperwear also makes neoprene SandBells, these steel shot-filled versions of the free weights are about half the size of and, some say, twice as dynamic as their counterparts. Available as individual...

Saturday, January 19, 2013
$14.65 from Amazon »

People think I drink only Kool-Aid and sodie pop because I'm immature and unrefined, but really it's because water is such a yawn. I need the excitement and intrigue of carbonation and colors insulting to nature in my beverages....

Tuesday, April 23, 2013
$9.50 from Amazon »

If you missed out on the Chain Link Zombie Slayer Axe, console...and arm...and shock & awe yourself with this sick little zombie killing knife. Combining the functionality of a kitchen cleaver and the intimidating aesthetics...

Monday, February 24, 2014
Giveaway: Super Mario Magic Billet Boxes 127
Giveaway Entry Is Closed

Stash your stash and stupefy untrained fingers Super Mario-style! Enter to win a set of Magic Billet Boxes fashioned after the legendary Nintendo bricks and ? blocks (a $240 value)!...

Sunday, June 9, 2013
Discontinued

Even in the virtual world, when it rains it pours. Not only is the ARAIG (As Real As It Gets) multi-sensory feedback suit the latest in a recent lineup of virtual gaming enhancement gear, but it has also joined VR immersive...

Sunday, August 14, 2011
$365.99 from ThinkGeek »

This is one of the coolest products we've come across in a long time. These are real damn jellyfish swimming around in your house. This is a very legitimate site and has a solution for all budgets....

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Loot Crates are what happens when Santa Claus remembers all of his favorite geeks and gamers the other 11 months of the year. You don't even have to be nice or well-behaved or someone who doesn't tailgate on the highway. All...

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Usually when people describe themselves they inflate the truth or do that reverse psychology trick where they say a bunch of self-deprecating things in an effort to convey the opposite meaning. In both cases they would like...

Saturday, May 24, 2014
$1,499.99 from Costco »

And I thought a Costco-sized can of baked beans was big. The stock-up store's contributions to hunger management have always been supersized, so it should come as no surprise that their idea of an emergency preparedness food...

Sunday, January 27, 2013
$199 from NinjaBlocks »

The only thing I know about Hackers is that Angelina Jolie makes a hot one, but according to Ninja Blocks, that's enough to qualify me for the job. Of a hacker, not Angelina Jolie. Though I could probably pull off the latter...

Sunday, January 20, 2013
$79.99 - $119.99 from Amazon »

When I feel a tinge of pain during my engagement in taxing pursuits of physical prowess, such as owning the squash court and attending Zumba classes, I calmly remove myself from the action--no matter how many feisty Latinas...

Sunday, June 3, 2012
$3,300 from Bionic Concepts »

JP Rishea masterminds a legion of sick conglomerations of metal and power, but the Exo-Gauntlet is probably his most irrationally needful of them all. I guess one could technically argue that it has a few practical applications...

Wednesday, July 18, 2012
$9.79 from Amazon »

Dude Wipes: A Brief Overview of Audience and Application. Dude Wipes are for dudes. And every once in while--say, every 18 to 24 hours--dudes tend to have an especially...explosive...encounter with the bathroom. The kind of...

Monday, March 3, 2014
$24.99 from Amazon »

We've seen dudes with horse head masks and we've seen squirrels with big head feeders, so to complete the triangle of masks and garden critter nourishment, Archie McPhee obviously had to create a Horse Head Squirrel Feeder....

Sunday, October 6, 2013
$68.80 from Amazon »

Be a real-life, modern-day superhero with Zippo's 4-in-1 Woodsman tool as your trademark weapon. Pretty lady's kitty stuck in a tree? No problem. Slide out the Woodsman's axe and chop it down. Cats always land on their feet...

Wednesday, February 12, 2014
$42.88 from Amazon »

What kind of mad Japanese scientist concoction is in these Baropacks that makes them boil water with no supplemental heating element? No fire, no gas, no electricity, not even the sun. Now I can make spaghetti & meatballs...

Tuesday, July 31, 2012
$2,250 from PowerDive »

Many of us dig communing with corals and fishes and hot merpeople lookin' for a good time 40 feet beneath the ocean's surface, but suited up SCUBA-style in bulky BC vests and heavy oxygen tanks sort of encumbers the experience....

Friday, May 9, 2014
$999 from Halfbike »

Urban mobility. I hear that term a lot now since almost anyone who lives in a city of over 500,000 people spends half their lives sitting in traffic not being urbanly mobile. The Halfbike, a kind of bicycle-meets-elliptical-machine...

Saturday, July 26, 2014
$11.80 from Amazon »

F*cked up? I prefer to think of it as irreverently incapacitated. But that's just because I'm a pillar of class even when I'm challenging a Belgian vagabond to a Fireball shooting contest in a Buenos Aires bar, and then yelling...

Friday, November 29, 2013
$9.89 from Amazon »

Both the best and the worst part about the Kama Pootra is that many of its 52 Mind-Blowing Ways to Poop turn a visit to the crapper into a group activity. I mean, on the one hand, who couldn't use a little help pinching one...

Thursday, February 28, 2013

In case there was any confusion, Poundtown Condom vendor Say It with a Condom specifies this particular latex shroud is for "anyone who's a Poundtown regular, or is coming for the first time." Haha, get it? There are, like...

Wednesday, December 4, 2013
$24.99 from Amazon »

Well I hope the Reloaded version of Lightning Reaction doesn't follow in the footsteps of The Matrix and suck. Or maybe it's being cheeky and willingly emulating the trilogy's second installment--in the sense that while the...

Friday, September 26, 2014
$5.99 - $9.99 from Viveltre »

Today's Lesson: If you're going to eat...hold on, let me count...30 jumbo marshmallows for breakfast, they may as well be jumbo marshmallows that are F'ing. Delicious. Viveltre, confectioner and administrator of my lesson...

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

I'm afraid online ordering options for the cyborg flesh treatment have yet to make it to Amazon. In fact, should you want an anatomical anomaly tattoo so whiplash-inducingly realistic and infatuating it gets mistaken for professionally...

Sunday, May 6, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

He is the first Avenger. An unparalleled patriot whose loyalty, stealth, and shredded abs have kept America safe from the likes of Doctor Faustus, Viper, and HYDRA since 1941. And now, motorcycle-riding superhero devotees...

Tuesday, August 5, 2014
$299.99 from Big Bad Toy Store »

Turns out R2-D2 can project more than a pretty face. And far more useful than Princess Leia's bunned mug is the droid's holographic keyboard, a new addition to the virtual QWERTY world. Like the Cube and its keychain-sized...

Monday, June 24, 2013
$115 - $125 from JumpStartCity »

The only not titanium components in Brian Fellhoelter's TiBolt bolt action pen are the the ink cartridge, spring, O-ring, and stylus nib. It's kind of like how the only not titanium components in my rock hard body are my blood...

Friday, September 12, 2014
$78.59 from Amazon »

Here's a swell gift for the person you hate most in life. The Tikker watch is set to countdown to its wearer's death. Oh sure, its creators try to spin it as a timepiece of happiness. The box even reads, "Tikker: The Happiness...

Friday, May 18, 2012
$199.99 from ThinkGeek »

Robert Downey Jr. is almost as cool as Tony Stark, and the fact that RDJ is wearing the Iron Man Magtitan New Legend Power Bands while playing Tony Stark in the new Avengers movie, and the Power Bands ThinkGeek is selling...

Friday, August 15, 2014
$24.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Save a few bucks on the ChargeKey this week and next. It's on sale for $24.99 from the Dude Exclusives online store....

Thursday, February 6, 2014
$19.99 from Shot Straws »

First off, let me say that I do not advocate taking shots through a Shot Straw. I advocate taking shots like a real man. However, if the memory of particularly rough night with Minnesotan twins, a ZZ Top fan club, and free-flowing...

Sunday, December 1, 2013
$29.99 from Decal Girl »

This retro Nintendo skin for the PlayStation 4 is what I'm giving to Cornelius as a Pre-Christmas and, more importantly, consolation gift since he will not be having sex with any regularity (i.e., at all) for the foreseeable...

Sunday, August 18, 2013
$36.29 from Amazon »

If you just want people to keep the F out, get an Add-a-Lock. But if you want them to believe for a split second that they have successfully encroached your space, only to disrupt the blaze of an invisble light that in turn...

Wednesday, April 23, 2014
$50.49 from Firebox.com »

Finally! A use for babies! Come on little Timmy, you need to work up an appetite and I need to see my reflection in those hardwoods. That's right, time to earn your breast milk, son. And try not to get too sweaty or haggard...

Tuesday, October 21, 2014
$79.99 from Leggage »

A laptop case for frequent travelers, the few inches of of tipi-ed bulk Leggage adds to its frame says it will elevate, massage, and assuage your restless feet and legs during miserable, interminable flights (i.e., all flights)....