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Zombie Bottle Opener

By: on July 02, 2012
$12.95
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One perk to acquiring the zombie virus--I mean in addition to looking all sexy and green-tinged and bloody--is super-calcified teeth that enable sweet party tricks, such as popping open beer bottles with a single incisor and gnawing people's faces off. NeatoShop pays morbid homage to at least one of these feats with its nifty Zombie Bottle Opener. Crafted from sturdy urethane resin and solid steel around the mouth, and painted by local artisans, no two openers are exactly alike, but all are equally capable of both attacking the holdout bottle caps keeping you from your German Hefeweizens, and making your buddy's prissy girlfriend bristle.

Zombie Bottle Openers measure 1 3/4" x 4 1/2" x 2".

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Flayed Flesh Garters

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Take peek-a-boo garters to the next level: peek-a-boo blood vessels and layers of muscle tissue, courtesy of open-wound prostheses and stocking accoutrements from Etsy's Meaghan O'Keefe. A pair of unpainted latex prostheses...

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Melting Bloody Hand Candle

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Now here's a bloody handy gift for Halloween. Bryan Lawrence makes these terrifically creepy candles, you guessed it, by hand, using flesh-colored wax for the outer layers of their fingers and palms, and blood-red on...

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Boker made a wee mini axe to dangle from your neck. The Hawkit Neck Knife Axe won't do much good if you need to fell a tree, or even chop up some kindling, but as a funkily-shaped multi-tool and piece of EDC, it will...

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Kinkajou Bottle Cutter

$49.95 from Amazon »

Kinkajou. The word sounds like it applies to a precocious, yet cuddly, mammalian sidekick that sits on your shoulder and surreptitiously swipes peoples' two-bite brownies and tubes of lip gloss during walks through the...

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Roo Balls Kangaroo Scrotum Bottle Openers

$29.95 - $32.95 from Roo Balls! »

Want to be a true baller? Then grab that Triple IPA and crack it open with the scrotum of a Red Kangaroo. Or an Eastern Grey. Roo Balls turns (humanely and legally acquired*) castrated kangaroo bits into beer and wine...

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FireWater Water Bottle & Lantern

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The FireWater Multi-Bottle from Seattle Sports combines a water bottle, a lantern, and a waterproof storage container into one collapsible and rechargeable piece of gear. Handy....

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Fontus Self-Filling Water Bottles

$165 - $200 from Fontus »

"Self-Generating Water Bottles" might be a better description of Fontus' incredible new designs. Presuming they work as stated (this is another crowdfunding campaign after all), Fontus Airo and Ryde bottles don't just...

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Umoro One Shaker Bottle

$25 from Umoro »

As a supplement fiend--I especially like the ones whose claims have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA--I gotta recognize the Umoro One first for concept alone. A sport bottle whose lid doubles as a powder and...

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Fruit Infuser Water Bottle

$32.14 from Amazon »

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