Jewelry

Cowboy Hat Engagement Ring Box

$7.58 Amazon »

Wanna be my lil' lady, lil' lady? The Cowboy Hat Engagement Ring Box is for all the ranchers, wild westerners, and southern charmers out there who are done horsin' around, and ready to propose to their partners in true...

Dripping Blood Pearl Necklace

$27.99 Amazon »

Yep, I read it on Reddit. Or rather, I saw the Dripping Blood Pearl Necklace on Reddit, as you and thousands of others may have too. But I still couldn't resist showcasing it here, given that blood and pearls are what...

Sardine Can Ring

$158.68 Etsy »

This Sardine Can Ring, handmade by Ruben Morales, is up for an Etsy Design Award, and while I would never wear a Sardine Can Ring myself, or give a Sardine Can Ring as a gift to anyone I know...except perhaps my cat...

The Accuser Ring with Blinking Opal Eyes

J'accuse! this humanoid ring and its opal eyes that actually blink of...being awesome. Made by Levon Kevorkian and sold through his Internal Affairs jewelry studio, The Accuser Ring will tell everyone you meet that your...

Light Cycle 2.0 Glow-Core Wedding Ring

$195 Etsy »

You can't have a TRON Light Cycle (at least not anymore, you could a few years ago) but if you're a good fiance, and show up at the altar on time...or maybe just at all...you can have a Light Cycle 2.0 Glow-Core Wedding...

Chess Set in a Ring

I lay down my King and resign. Before even beginning a game on Joe Turner's wonderful, but Grandmaster-level, Chess Set in a Ring. Sorry, make that Grandmaster-vision-and-fine-motor-skill-level Chess Set in a Ring. Made...

Oreylo Helix Hook Ear Cuffs

$24.95 - $29.95 Oreylo »

Earrings meet ear cuffs...meet hat pins meet cocktail toothpicks in Oreylo's line of Helix Hook Ear Cuffs. Yes, I know what you're thinking: Dude, that's a good way to puncture some lymph nodes in the name of fashion...

Fidget Zipper Bracelet

$7.50 Etsy »

Zipper-dee-doo-dah your stress, anxiety, and excess energy away with a Fidget Zipper Bracelet. Or 10 of them, since that's how many you'll get in an order from this listing. Just imagine all the OCD-methodical zipping...

Leg Chains

$20.99 - $29.99 Etsy »

Nothing sets off a slit better than...well, the leg underneath it. Ahem, Angelina Jolie. But after that, definitely one of these Leg Chains. Any one of them. They're all hot. So hot. Like, Yowza!, Waa-waa-wee-wow!, How...

Screwdriver Ring

$85 Yetch »

The screwy thing about this ring is...literal. And only literal, because the Screwdriver Ring isn't weird or messed up at all. It's awesome!...

GLD x Marvel Jewelry

$99 - $129 GLD »

Got drip? Yeah, that's right, I just described the new GLD x Marvel Jewelry collaboration using a Millennial meme combined with Gen Z slang. Because, like Deadpool, that's how groovy and rad I am...

Zombie Hands Resin Ring

$109.80 Etsy »

Rising from the depths of the earth...and your middle knuckle...the zombies are coming! So far, it's just their hands that have popped out of the graves, but just you wait. Where there are resin hands, there are resin...

Sword Cuff Bracelet

$139.90 Etsy »

Normally, a great warrior wouldn't want to see his sword blade bent and wrapped into a big "O." But in the case of this Sword Cuff Bracelet from Osiris Jewelry, I think, whether viking, medieval knight, or Geralt of Rivia...

Personalized Family Crest Ring

$2,750 Etsy »

I'll pass on wearing my heart on my sleeve, but my family honor on my finger? Yes please, pass me a Personalized Family Crest Ring...

Fordite & Vintage Westinghouse Micarta Ring

$900 Black Badger »

Black Badger's Fordite & Vintage Westinghouse Micarta Ring is a funhouse of kaleidoscopic colors and a rare 1940s material the band's designer, James Thompson, calls "OG composite...fo shiz."...

Personalized Name or Message Thong

$35.50 Etsy »

Although these personalized name or message thong underwear are super...duper...sexy, I could never ask my wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power, to place a chain link g-string between her cheeks. I mean, eek. Talk about a...

Collide Connecting Engagement & Wedding Rings for Men

$1,500 - $2,500 Collide Rings »

Collide Rings, a set of connecting engagement and wedding rings for men, are for all the dudes out there who want to show the world they're taken from the moment their lady says, "Yes." Or, I suppose, Collide Rings are...

I F**king Love You Morse Code Necklace

$44 - $49 Etsy »

The I F**king Love You Morse Code Necklace from Cursing in Code falls somewhere between an engagement ring and the You Is Fine Bears when it comes to gifts for your girlfriend that will make her heart melt this Valentine's...

Lampjoy Glass Rings

$16.20 - $30.70 Etsy »

My wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power, would break a Lampjoy Glass Ring within 5 minutes of putting it on. No offense, sugar britches, but you are the be-all, end-all of hand talkers, and at least one of those enthusiastic...

Viper Ring

$129 Amazon »

Welp, it's better than having a viper around your neck. This Viper Ring turns the Mangshan pit viper into a beautiful, formidable piece of jewelry. Its head sits atop your finger, while its body, er, snakes around either...

Norse Tradesman Hair & Beard Coils

$14.87 Amazon »

My fellow vikings and ancient Scandinavians at heart, what better way to show your old Norse appreciation than by be-baubling your beards, braids, and dreadlocks with these coiled hair and beard rings from Norse Tradesman?...

Strong Man Ring Holder

$19.95 Amazon »

Sure, this Strong Man Ring Holder is super ripped and all, but I bet the dude's a total acne-ridden, cross-eyed, butter face. Ugly as sin, and that's why they never show him from the front in any of the ring holder's...

Masters of the Universe Orko Chain Necklace

A Masters of the Universe Orko Chain Necklace?! Hot diggity-dog, my wife, She-Ra: Princess of Power is gonna Adora this! (Haha, get it?) Who else needs a gift for a woman packed with the power of a Trollan?...

Give Me An Inch - Real Inch Ruler Necklace

$9.99 - $22.49 Etsy »

Here we have a real inch ruler necklace, entitled Give Me An Inch. I think it is the perfect gift for a frenemy, or my Aunt Jan, that is both an interesting piece of jewelry, and a passive aggressive way of indicating...