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ToppCock Silver Odor Neutralizer Gel

By: on November 11, 2016
$9.99
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I didn't have enough room in the title to add "...for Man Parts." Do you think it would be too offensive to give a bottle of ToppCock Silver Odor Neutralizer Gel to this guy I know at work as an Anonymous Santa gift? Like, worse than the internal deodorant pills I gave him last year? People can be kind of touchy about being told they are stink bombing the rest of us out of the office!

What I like about ToppCock Silver's pitch is that it isn't a perfume-y cover up, but a stench neutralizer. The company says its natural antibacterial tea tree oil and aloe vera active ingredients will turn down below-the-belt essences of human bio-rot without making you smell like a medicine cabinet or piece of gum. Silver also comes in gel form, so it's less messy to apply than powder, though should dry without a sticky residue so you're ultimately left with cockandballs that feel all powdered and ready for the ball. Putting ToppCock on top can also help soothe irritation and itch.

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Amabrush 10-Second Automatic Toothbrush

$90 - $113 from Amabrush »

Amabrush says it's the World's First Automatic Toothbrush, but watching the demo video makes me think it's just the first time someone thought to cross a Blizzident with a vibrator....

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The Odorless Toilet Fan

$169.95 from Amazon »

The Odorless Toilet Fan claims to be "the #1 way to eliminate #2 odor." The unit installs inside your toilet tank to inhale all the foul-smelling air your bowel movements produce so you don't have to....

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G2 Turbo - Wearable Fan for Back(pack) Sweat

$19 - $23 from Kickstarter »

Part of me hopes the Presti G2 Turbo becomes the Little Crowdfunding Project That Could. Because I just saw The Goonies on cable for the 400th time, and this aerator of back sweat - what inventor Edwin Wang calls the...

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Aerogel - World's Lightest Solid

$35 - $55 from BuyAerogel »

Not only is aerogel the world's lightest solid with a composition of 99.8% air (carbon dioxide) and 0.2% silica gel, and not only does it have sick nicknames, such as "frozen smoke" and "blue smoke", but it also has the...

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Blizzident - 6-Second Toothbrush

$299 from Blizzdent »

It looks like someone put the inside of a sea urchin on the inside of a mouthpiece, but if Blizzident really works, I wouldn't care if it looked like one of the McPoyle brothers' armpits. I'll be able to brush my teeth--and...

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Dyson Pure Hot+Cool Link Air Purifier

$502.54 - $584 from Amazon »

Sure, the Dyson Pure Hot+Cool Link Air Purifier has the Dyson name going for it. The air de-polluter and fan also has both Warm Me and Blow Me settings, so you can use it all year 'round to help achieve an optimal level...

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My Shiney Hiney Brush Set

$16.88 - $19.98 from Amazon »

Well. I wouldn't argue it isn't dirty. I'm just not sure I care enough to go to the lengths required to make my hiney shiney. I think this cleansing brush set for the bunghole is geared towards women anyway, judging by...

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5" Battery Operated Clip Fan

$34.99 from Amazon »

I saw this little battery operated clip fan for beach chairs, backpacks, treadmills, and strollers when I was looking at Seville's UltraSlimline Oscillating Tower Fan. That one got some good press in a Best Fan roundup...

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Wicks Stick-On Sweat Shields

$7.99 from Wicks »

Wicks adhesive strips give wearers the functional advantage of acting as a sweat shield, diverting the blur and sting of salty secretions away from our eyes during exercise. And stylistically? Well, I heard oompa loompas...

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Yank Me Candles

$19.95 from Amazon »

Yank Me Candles are terrific gag or white elephant gifts in the vein of WTF Prank Candles, but with a different kind of blood pulsing through them. The latter have delightful sounding names, such as Apple Pie, on the...

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HEX On Demand+ Spray & Go Gear Cleaner

$9.99 from Amazon »

HEX knows the best part of working out is when you can't go right home and throw your sweaty stuff in the laundry or STINKBoss after, so you wad it up in a plastic bag and leave it to roast in your car for the next 8...

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AquaDance Drencher Showerhead

Sold Out from Amazon »

No, I am not showing you the AquaDance Drencher 3-setting 8" curved rainfall showerhead with waterfall mode just because it looks like a vagina....