Body Mint Internal Deodorant Pills
/body-mint-internal-deodorant-11729.jpg "Body Mint Internal Deodorant Pills")
- Chewable Deodorant Pills - $20.95
- Body Mints - $14.99
- Nature's Way Chlorofresh - $7.83
- Dr Mist: All-Natural Body Hygiene Spray - $10.09
- Deo Perfume Candy - $4.99
I can't guarantee you'll get laid if you don't smell like a cesspool of bacteria and last night's broccoli & Cheez Whiz casserole, but I can guarantee you won't get laid if you do. My point: you're better off not smelling like a cesspool of bacteria and last night's broccoli & Cheez Whiz casserole. Understandably, that's easier said than done for some active bodies and active eaters. So for you there's Body Mint Sport, a bottle of pills intended to curb the olfactory repercussions of highly active lifestyles.
Body Mint Sport pills have been formulated specifically for athletes and heavy sweaters concerned their body odor will repel or ruin their chances of physical contact with other human beings. According to creators Zero Gravity Hawaii, taking 2 Body Mint tablets twice a day will begin the attack on odor internally, neutralizing noxious fumes that would otherwise waft from sweaty armpits and feet. It also fights bad breath.
Made from "healthy green ingredients", namely a derivative of chlorophyll, they say Body Mint Sport can be used in addition to or instead of deodorant. If that's true, I'm going to buy a whole Santa Claus sack of the stuff and hand it out to homeless people and hippies and everyone I see leaving a Taco Bell. Resistant parties will be informed that the little green tablets are super-concentrated marijuana plant extract. No wait...all parties will be informed that they're super-concentrated weed pills. I'll charge $5 per pair. I can see the headline in the Times now: "Man Improves Smell of City Populace, Gets Extremely Rich." Mayor, I'll take that Man of the Year award whenever you're ready.
Active men and women, or sedentary men and women who smell like they're active, can purchase Body Mint Sport in 54-count bottles.
DudeIWantThat.com is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more.
/sure-fk-cologne-41608.jpg?mode=crop "Sure F**k Cologne")
Sure F**k Cologne
Sure Fuck Cologne is a self-described "cool fresh manly scent that thrusts women into a crazy hot SEXUAL FRENZY!" Whoa. That's specific. They even put "sexual frenzy" in all caps like it is when I think it over and over...
/smells-like-wd-40-cologne-58970.jpg?mode=crop "Smells Like WD-40 Cologne")
Smells Like WD-40 Cologne
Ready to get into some more MSCHF? Smells Like WD-40 Cologne comes in hot - but very quiet, nary a squeak to be heard - on the heels of the subversive art collective's Big Fruit Loop. And what is it?...
Down There Repair
Application of Sam's Natural Down There Repair fixes two major male discomforts and social embarrassments: chafed crotch and smelly crotch. It can also be used preventatively, thwarting these afflictions from striking...
Swallowable Parfum
Swallowable Parfum is a capsule that, when ingested, releases perfumed scents through its host's pores. So instead of spritzing dewy showers of juniper and orange blossom onto your body, you'll be able to sweat aromatic...
Backflow Incense Burners
OK, She-Ra: Princess of Power, I will get you a cascading waterfall of burning incense for Valentine's Day if you promise not to use the thing as a cauldron and Double, double toil and trouble a hex on me when you find...
Odafree - Fecal & Gas Odor Pills
Odafree is an over-the-counter supplement ingested to combat odors associated with the excretion of feces and flatulence. Without the euphemisms? It's a daily pill that claims to remove the stench of hot death from shit...
/laundry-sauce-worlds-best-56825.jpg?mode=crop "Laundry Sauce - World's Best Smelling Laundry Detergent")
Laundry Sauce - World's Best Smelling Laundry Detergent
Bet you never thought you'd describe your laundry detergent as "bold" and "soulful." And maybe you won't. But Laundry Sauce does...
Yank Me Candles
Yank Me Candles are terrific gag or white elephant gifts in the vein of WTF Prank Candles, but with a different kind of blood pulsing through them. The latter have delightful sounding names, such as Apple Pie, on the...
/record-player-car-air-56324.jpg?mode=crop "Record Player Car Air Freshener with Spinning Turntable")
Record Player Car Air Freshener with Spinning Turntable
Girl, put your records on...because it's smelling like gym socks and month-old Taco Bell up in this car! This record player car air freshener, like many other car air fresheners, attaches to your vent louvers, where it...
/heatless-flame-essential-oil-59128.jpg?mode=crop "Heatless Flame Essential Oil Diffuser & Humidifier")
Heatless Flame Essential Oil Diffuser & Humidifier
It's earth, wind, and fire! Well, presuming you fill this diffuser with a cedarwood or baking spice essential oil, fire up the fan on its cool mist humidifier, and ignite its heatless flame to achieve the ambience and...
/pissing-boy-incense-burner-55888.jpg?mode=crop "Pissing Boy Incense Burner")
Pissing Boy Incense Burner
Pissing Boy Incense Burner? More like Dribbling Boy Incense Burner. Come on, ye clever devils with the Manneken Pis mood-setting gift ideas, figure out how to add some arc to the boy's stream!...
/pumpkin-backflow-incense-56223.jpg?mode=crop "Pumpkin Backflow Incense Burner")
Pumpkin Backflow Incense Burner
Now I wouldn't call myself an Incense Dude - I'm more of a Rug Dude, obviously - but I am digging this Pumpkin Backflow Incense Burner as a gift for Halloween. It's countertop-sized, so much more subtle than the <a...