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Bloody Chainsaw Dress

By: on September 15, 2012
Discontinued

If you'll excuse me I'm just going to reach into my pocket...and fire up my bloody chainsaw! Yeah, it's made of a fine cotton blend. So? From Ewok/Chewbacca combo costumes, to Psycho Suzy Homemaker, Etsy seamstress Crissy Baker knows how to give hotness just the right amount of lemon twist. Her A-line shirtdress is available in sizes XS to XL, and nearly guarantees any lady who wears it will be the only one with an instant pocket chainsaw hand during upcoming Halloween festivities or trips to the grocery store. Order early for October 31 donning, as the Bloody Chainsaw Dress requires approximately 3 weeks to sew and ship.

In other news, last night someone told me about a guy they know named Bob Loblaw. Say it to yourself. OK, say it loud. Three times in a row. Hilarious!

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Sexy TRON Outfit

Discontinued

Wise shoppers know that when buying a gift, you should choose something for the recipient that you would never choose to buy for yourself. In that vein, this smokin' hot, 12-gauge clear plastic TRON corset lined with...

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Rogue From X-Men Costume

Discontinued

It's The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants' most famous defector in living, non-Anna-Paquin form! This milliskin Rogue jumpsuit is made to order in your choice of kotobukiya with green details, classic with black details, and...

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Granberg Chainsaw Mill

$159 from Amazon »

If someone twisted my arm put me into a Half Nelson and demanded I select some form of manual labor as my Sunday Funday activity, Granberg's Chainsaw Mill would be my first choice....

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Dozuki Z Saw

$27.72 from Amazon »

Seeing Dozuki's "Z" Saw reminds me this dude Franz I used to know always called me "Big Z." I asked him why once, but he pretended he didn't hear the question. I think it's pretty clear now though that there's a new Big...

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Cuts of Meat Dress

$62 from Etsy »

I love beef, and I love girls, but somehow the combination of the two doesn't work so well for me. The cuts of meat diagram on this dress carries implications of objectifying women and also cannibalism, and that is so...

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Undead Teds - Your Bear, Zombified

$110 - $140 from Undead Teds »

Whoa. I thought the scariest thing I'd ever seen was a real live British boy who looks like Chucky, but Undead Teds have staged a coup and now reign supreme. Even if they don't have the same bone-chilling, soprano accent....

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The Beauty of Horror: A GOREgeous Coloring Book

$14.75 from Amazon »

Adult coloring books have experienced a recent surge in sales as meditative and therapeutic outlets. But how the H-A-Double-Hockey-Sticks-O-W-E-E-N does The Beauty of Horror think I'm supposed to calm down and relieve...

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American Horror Story Rubber Man Suit

$35.89 - $40 from Amazon »

Bring out the gimp. The gimp's sleeping. Well, I guess you'll just have to go wake him up now, won't you? Wait...wrong S&M fetish scene. The Rubber Man suit is an American Horror Story derivation. Just as well, I guess....

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Super Mario Latex Dress

$205 from Etsy »

Hot. Sexy. Latex. When I think of Mario Bros. those are definitely the first 3 words that come to mind. And this latex dress captures that perfectly. I wonder how sweaty I would get if I tried to put that thing on? Not...

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Blood Bath Wallpaper

$53 from Pixers »

Huh. Now this is interesting. And by "interesting" I mean, "I really hope I never show up to someone's house and see an entire room wallpapered in blood splatters." That's, like, some psycho housewife shit. Some Kathy...

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Bubonic Bunny Hoppers

$20 from Etsy »

Looks like we're gonna have a grotesque perversion of the fuzzy, frolicky, happy animals emblematic of every major holiday now. First Phillip Blackman took on Valentine's Day with his Undead Teds, and here Undead Ed tackles...

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Zombie Lawn Flamingo

$14.60 from Amazon »

On the one hand, it's almost time to decorate for Halloween, so a zombie lawn flamingo would be a very wise purchase. And on the other hand, it's always time to class up the front yard, so a zombie lawn flamingo would...