Disposable Skin Stapler & Staple Remover
That's a nasty gash, but...you sure you want to go to the ER? Even with them all stretched to capacity, and me all standing here with a Disposable Skin Stapler set? And, I mean, you spent the last month mastering the self-haircut, so why not spend the next one practicing your self-suturing skills?
To be clear, "practice" is the key word here. The Matrix Wizard Disposable Skin Stapler and Staple Remover is a medical-grade set for training your hand at wound closure. Unlike the ZipStitch, Matrix Wizard doesn't really (or isn't allowed to) recommend their stapler as a DIY device, though some have reported using it successfully on pets and farm animals.
Instead, the company talks about the suturing set's value as a learning tool in preparation for real emergencies and survival situations, as well as a practice kit for medical students. Matrix Wizard also throws out a few more fun suggestions for their Disposable Skin Stapler: taxidermy; arts & crafts projects; and stuffed animal repair!
As I previously mentioned when discussing this Dragon Stapler, my friend Cornelius used to make money in junior high by stapling his arm for $1, so I know there's at least one type of person out there who is still going to be all over a medical-grade Skin Stapler as a self-administered and human-to-human first aid option.