A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Wednesday, February 5, 2014
$39 from Topatoco »

Brandon Bird created this Squid Flame hoodie, a clever piece of gear for all the fans of fantastical sea beasts and marine biologists out there. It is unclear, though, if Bird or someone on online retailer Topatoco's payroll...

Saturday, November 2, 2013
$26.99 from ThinkGeek »

Shake it, shake it. Shake it like a Polaroid picture. Guess what! The next time you have to do that because you get a pesky dingle berry whilst sitting on the toilet, the Polaroll toilet paper holder will be there to provide...

Monday, June 3, 2013
$4.99 - $10.50 from Amazon »

The Amazon reviews of Aztec Secret Indian Healing Clay--nearly 800 of them!--are so overwhelmingly positive it makes me wonder how I've never before heard of these miraculous bentonite particulates of the earth. Maybe I was too busy cultivating my beanstalk. People herald the clay's ability to visibly extract bacteria and blackheads from the face, chest, back, ass, you name it as it dries. But...

Thursday, June 7, 2012
$40 - $275 from Andromeda Glass »

Usually when some smug schmuck tells me to put that in my pipe and smoke it I must restrain myself from punching them in the face. But I think part of the reason such restraint is necessary is that I don't often enough put...

Tuesday, January 15, 2013
$38 - $44 from Amazon »

Here are some giant squishy beasts--Squishables, officially--fashioned after the likes of the Narwhal, T-Rex, Yeti, Cthulhu, Polar Bear, and Android mascot. I know you don't want one. But look: they appear to make ladies happy....

Thursday, January 24, 2013
$8 from Ruffbowl »

Before delving into RuffBowl specifics, I will share some fun facts about the French. Parisians love their dogs. The ratio of dogs to people in that city is 1:7. But they don't love cleaning up after their dogs. In fact, the French refuse to scoop poop. And on an average day, pooches deposit about 20 tons of it on the city's streets, sidewalks, and outdoor patios. About 650 people a year are injured...

Monday, August 15, 2011
$18.15 from Amazon »

Yes, this is actually a coffee mug. I'll grant you, it is very detailed and looks just like a camera lens, but it really is a coffee mug. It is NOT a camera lens. Don't buy this and complain to me that the photo quality is...

Wednesday, June 26, 2013
$59 from Nap Anywhere »

Oh boy, and I think the NapAnywhere pillow looks just enough like a neck brace that I can convince suspicious parties I need it for medical reasons. Let me tell you some things I do not enjoy that will maybe become bearable...

Friday, August 2, 2013
$26.75 from Amazon »

I know what you're thinking: that is a slab of jerky with the inexplicable addition of dried fruit and a fancy wrapper. And I say, yeah, OK. That's one way to look at Epic grass-fed meat bars. But having tried the Bison Bacon...

Monday, September 30, 2013
$4,150 from Bruce Mahalski »

Ladies, who wants to bone a guitar god? Come on now, don't start a stampede. There are plenty of sheep femurs and possum skulls to go around, and room enough on my acoustic slim body for at least a couple hundred of you to...

Saturday, June 2, 2012

I suppose the Dope Swimsuit describes how the women wearing it look and feel, as well as what the men who see these women act like they have been smoking. A jet black one-piece with "Dope" spelled in hip cursive just slightly...

Sunday, November 4, 2012
$32.49 - $149.99 from Amazon »

Bytox Hangover Prevention Patch: Argument in Favor....

Friday, April 19, 2013
$39.99 from Amazon »

Oh, here's a desktop accessory I would knock over at least 5 times a day. It's called the Perpetual Calendar...of Frustration...and its duo of magnetic balls slide right and left and round and round to keep track of the month...

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

This belongs on The Game of Thrones or Lord of the Rings. This bed made of ash and featuring silk curtains, is part of a collection of furniture. I think this bed is probably too good for me. If I laid my dirty feet down on...

Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Discontinued

If you have $75 and the desire to slice 10" of carbon fiber through the air, Tyler Seamons has an official flying saucer of summertime for you. Pending successful project funding on Kickstarter, his frisbee and golf-style...

Saturday, December 22, 2012

I have so many reasons to celebrate. 1) It didn't reach 1215 degrees F yesterday (and despite some initial white-knuckling turbulence, my airplane did not fall out of the sky). 2) Three days from now I'm going to be receiving...

Friday, November 9, 2012
$24.95 from Amazon »

My girlfriend says there's a laser treatment for your face that feels like you're repeatedly getting shot with a fully-extended rubber band. Which sounds terrible to me, and not really that much fun for either the recipient...

Thursday, December 13, 2012
$12 from Amazon »

"Fool" is such a grand addition to the English language. Mr. T knew what was up. Apparently, bib-wearing babies do too. I knew they were smarter than they look. I bet in actuality they're like a tribe of wee geniuses hiding...

Sunday, May 12, 2013
$12 - $85 from Shapeways »

I've never cared much for the word "Claddagh." It sounds like a combination of too many different scary female body parts and sexually transmitted diseases. But the rings themselves are alright if you're into, like, announcing...

Monday, June 10, 2013
$79.95 from WickedLasers.com »

For the times you'd rather use the World's Most Powerful Laser to shed light on a situation instead of to incinerate its components, Wicked Lasers' Phosforce flashlight adapter for their Arctic 1W handheld laser pointer will...

Friday, June 7, 2013
$24.95 - $29.95 from PocketStrings »

We need way more products like PocketStrings. Products that allow people to do things that would normally disturb me without disturbing me. The Baby Muzzle was a good start. Now this portable, silent guitar practice tool....

Wednesday, August 15, 2012
$334.99 from SpyHawk »

Normally, I don't like the idea of a Big Brother entity invading citizens' privacy and monitoring their every move. But I can go for it on occasion. Like on the occasion that Big Brother is me. Like on the occasion that I...

Saturday, June 8, 2013
$17.80 from Amazon »

Gators and ostrich and bears, oh my...dayum! Giving bacon gift boxes and Broquets a possible run for their money this Father's Day: Buffalo Bob's Wild Game Jerky. The sampler pack....

Wednesday, August 24, 2011
$49 million from Yahoo »

Think the washer and dryer included? This place has to be seen to be believed. Can someone who lives in LA drive by there and tell them you want to get some video for DudeIWantThat.com? Also get a video of their response when...

Thursday, May 9, 2013
$29.99 from Pure Gear »

Retro game smartphone cases go legitimately retro--like back to the 1920s when the only people still alive who would remember pachinko boards and ball mazes as their primary form of childhood entertainment really can't remember...

Wednesday, January 1, 2014
$116.56 from Amazon »

Happy New Year! Here's something to make you feel fat, ugly, and depressed motivate and inspire you to reach your 2014 fitness goals! The Fitbit Aria Wi-Fi Smart Scale measures weight, body fat percentage, and body mass index...

Thursday, October 25, 2012
$19.99 from Amazon »

How the heckfire did Seth Casteel even come up with this idea of photographing dogs fetching balls and sticks and other lures of underwater canine submersion? Its hilarity--with one wrench of pure horror in the form of a snarling...

Saturday, April 20, 2013
$330 from Etsy »

Yoda pipe? Yes, I'll take one. I will also take one six-piece Chicken McNugget, a dozen Doritos Locos tacos, a deep dish pepperoni pizza with extra sauce, and three large Oreo Mint Blizzards. Thank you, and Happy 4/20....

Saturday, August 3, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I'd imagine a concern for all parents, but particularly male parents, is having a baby and then accidentally dropping it. Or tucking it snoozing in its carrier under the table at the bar so it will be out of the way, and then...

Sunday, September 4, 2011
$49.99 from ThinkGeek »

Equally adept at keeping your more retarded friends locked in as getting them all killed in a fire, the Defendius Labyrinth Security Lock is a pretty cool concept. Wouldn't this be better for impeding entry to keep all of...

Tuesday, November 12, 2013
$16 from Firebox.com »

What is, a man who ate his daughter's 1st birthday cake without a fork, Alex? No? What is...a makeshift Fraggle mask? No? OK, then how about you just tell me why this man has neon pink goo smeared on his face, Mr. Trebek?...

Sunday, June 30, 2013
$59.95 from myType »

I'll tell you one thing I like is buttons. This touch screen crapola, even when it's all cool and laser virtual keyboard-y and keychain-sized, is unacceptable to my manly and powerful hands. They just do not like typing on...

Tuesday, January 1, 2013
$1,388.66 from Shapeways »

This is what my head feels like this morning. I thought it would be appropriate for the day after New Year's Eve (aka New Year's Day) in case yours does too. Misery loves company. Company now comes in the form of a Nuke Lamp....

Wednesday, September 18, 2013
$279 from GNR 8 »

The Mirror 180's joined splices allow it to tilt and reposition such that it reflects many a splendid thing. Namely, a more comprehensive view of me. One half of the mirror angles into 3 different positions, suiting a bevy...

Sunday, December 16, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Of course I don't need a mitten-koozie hybrid so that I may drink chilled alcoholic beverages in freezing temperatures, one right after another like the gluttonous, midwestern lush that I am, without rendering my delicate...

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Instead of outgrowing your superhero, fairytale, and cartoon character childhood toys, let them mature with you. Preserve their magnificence, and thwart being labeled a creepy action figure nerd, with Evil Robot Designs' Bespoke...

Tuesday, April 2, 2013
$20 from black + blum »

Not only is a polar bear ice cube tray adorable and perfect for assuaging the injuries of children who hurt themselves doing something stupid that you told them not to, but the design itself is also highly utilitarian, solving...

Tuesday, October 15, 2013
$59.98 from Amazon »

Here's a blast from Halloween past. And not just OG, circa 1978 Michael Meyers, OG 2.0, circa 1998 Michael Meyers too. Remember when they released the Halloween H20 remake to celebrate the series' 20th anniversary? And Jamie...

Sunday, September 18, 2011
Discontinued

Nothing says you mean business in a fight (or life) like a set of deer antlers fashioned into brass knuckles gripped loosely in an open hand. I think just wearing them is enough to deliver a firm message. What that message...

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Wedding cakes have been topped with zombies. Video game junkies. Your own face. But have you ever seen one topped with an infinite web of sugar spun in 3 out of 3 dimensions? The Sugar Lab will custom make 3D printed sugar...

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Here are some problems with not brushing your teeth: brown teeth; hot buttered ass breath. Here are some problems with brushing your teeth regularly: gum recession due to hard bristles and/or overzealous brushing techniques;...

Tuesday, May 15, 2012
$62.95 from Amazon »

Life-sized is still a few feet away, but this giant Chewbacca plush toy measures in at a formidable 24" tall x 15" wide. Which is probably bigger than the kid you're going to pretend you're buying him for. And when you press...

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Otherworldly neon suction cups for the legs! Artist James Lillis took a NASA photo of an actual galaxy, and transposed it onto tongue-waggingly tight leggings in purples and blues so riveting anyone who gazes upon them will...

Tuesday, August 28, 2012
$8,500 from Inno-Motion »

The Swiss LimbIC chair, which looks more like part of an amusement part ride than a cubicle fixture, proposes to take ergonomic furniture to new levels of comfort, freedom, and neurological stimulation. Kind of like the desk...

Wednesday, November 21, 2012
$1,095 from Oru Kayak »

The San Francisco Bay Area: Big waters, small living spaces, crowded streets, zero parking. Because Anton Willis loves to kayak, and because he isn't a whiner who sits around complaining about problems instead of doing something...

Bar
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
$90.61 - $98.88 from Amazon »

When the tops come off, the fun begins! That's what they say about these bottle cap bar stools, but I don't see much about the statement that has anything to do with bottle cap bar stools. Obviously I like it as it relates...

Saturday, June 15, 2013
$7.99 from Amazon »

Well, Prism Glasses for reading in bed or Prism Glasses for reading while lying flat on your back on the hood of someone's Honda Civic after you wake up from a drunken pass out and need to smartphone your way into determining...

Saturday, September 7, 2013

It's the double helix of your literary life. And remember, there's a 50/50 chance its contents will get passed down to your kids, so maybe try filling it with something other than comic books, porn, and smooth jazz, 'ey?...

Monday, September 2, 2013
$32 from Best Made »

This is a nice cup. It's sturdy--steel coated with enamel, double-thick on the handle and rim to defray those areas' proportionately high use and abuse. Also it has "Steadfast" and "Best Made" stamped in large letters all...

Tuesday, March 19, 2013
$145 from Amazon »

Sunglasses. They can become as iconic as the people whose eyes they cover. Like the ones that Aykroyd and Belushi wore in The Blues Brothers. That Tom Cruise wore in Top Gun. That Ray Charles wore in...life. And now, from...

Thursday, January 24, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Admittedly, when I think "dogfight", the next words that pop into my head aren't typically "helium balloons". However, I am learning to be more creatively minded. For example, I recently applied cream cheese to my all-beef...

Wednesday, June 5, 2013
$27 - $100 from Havoc Boards »

Havoc Boards. Fifteen custom-designed maps of cities, countries, and regions either printed on professional grade gaming board or engraved in solid wood, and primed for your Mark "The Undertaker" Calaway-style total domination....

Wednesday, December 19, 2012
$89.99 from Etsy »

Aaahhh! Sensory overload! Star Wars, comic books, low cut, short skirt, hot girl...too many pleasing stimuli for my sensitive male ecosystem to process. Now this is a New Year's Eve dress if I've ever seen one....

Wednesday, September 18, 2013
$2,299.99 from Entertainment Earth »

My life-size Iron Man statue needs a buddy. Or a nemesis so I can choreograph elaborate sparring bouts for the two of them in my head. Or how about Tony Stark can be my super-ego and this 6' tall stormtrooper my id, and together...

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

The days of old school Nintendo Zappers and Duck Hunt have come full circle. Except this time the Zapper is souped up with a 2W+ blue laser, and can blast real ducks. Or at least light paper ducks on fire. DIY extraordinaires...

Monday, November 11, 2013
$25.22 from Amazon »

This Password Vault seems like a decent gift for people who, like me, follow the universal password rules of choosing a different protective code of at least 8 characters, half of which are symbols or caps, for every one of...

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

The Hybrid Race Replica, or HRR, Motorcyle is a material science concept racing bike that harnesses the power of 1 million babies, er, I mean the sun, with its thin film solar paint, as well as colleccts clean backup power...

Tuesday, November 26, 2013
$38.12 from Amazon »

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, and people who live in marble towers should watch out because...bombs away! MindWare's Q-Ba-Maze 2.0 is an interlocking system of brightly-hued cubes that tinkerers small...

Wednesday, March 12, 2014
$11.68 from Amazon »

When I was little Mr. Spock and Dr. Spock were names thrown around on TV and in my household with equal regularity, so for years I thought they were the same person. It seemed only mildly strange that a pointy-eared human-vulcan...

Thursday, May 16, 2013
$27 from Etsy »

Designer Samantha Ulrich calls this her Googly Eyed Monster Mug, I guess due to Sesame Street's having a corner on the market of using the words "Cookie" and "Monster" consecutively. Which, on the one hand, is kind of BS seeing...

Wednesday, July 3, 2013
$14.10 from Amazon »

If they were going to craft a Scarface garden gnome aiming an M16A1, you would think they could have also added some Al Pacino droopy eyes and a pouty mouth underneath that Santa Claus beard. As it stands--at only 9-1/2" tall...

Tuesday, November 19, 2013
$599 from Amazon »

Some people believe that a blaring alarm shattering the silence of our slumber and tearing our eyes open in the still-blackness of a winter morning isn't so good for the body. Philips, makers of the Wake-Up Light and alarm...

Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Dogs. Always wanting to do everything their humans do. Drink beer. Hog the bed. Hump ladies' legs. And while they've mastered the latter two, minus the times a drunk guest sneaks them a few swigs during holiday parties, dogs...

Wednesday, January 23, 2013
$150 - $160 from NFNT »

The Big Face Woody. Is the name alone not reason enough to pledge our support of Oahu designer NFNT's bamboo watch? I wonder how many people inadvertently stumble across this eco-friendly wooden timepiece during Google searches...

Bar
Monday, January 21, 2013
$12 from Gama Go »

Not just an ice skull, but an ice skull with geometric lines and bends that make it look like some sort of diamond or crystal Indiana Jones-style ice skull. Astonishing what they can do with plastic molds these days. Just...

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Now that flavored vodkas have started to peak in trendiness--I saw Cilantro over the weekend--and most states are prohibiting smoking inside public places, it's only natural that some enterprising company would bring Tobacco...

Friday, January 11, 2013
Discontinued

Christmas: Over. Valentine's Day: Dammit! Still to come. But get your wife/girlfriend/favorite cheese girl at the Whole Foods a Star Wars Death Star Heart Necklace, and you'll both check another gift off your list and make...

Saturday, October 27, 2012
$275 from Hard Point »

In life, it's important to possess three things with a pistol grip: a pistol; a hairdryer; and a Manticuda knife. Designed for ease of access and supreme thrusting power, the steel Manticuda's fixed blade and 90-degree bend...