Inventio HD Video Sunglasses

$129.95 from SpyTec »

One thing I've always wanted to do while fending off UV rays is record myself fending off UV rays. Granted, this usually entails lying on my ass in the company of a sand-free beach mat, a 6-pack...fine, a case...of Bud...

Anton Semenov Digital Art

To me (an art expert of the highest respect) this looks like something I would have seen in the movie The Mummy and it makes me feel scared. That's a first rate art critique right there. Tons of cool images in this gallery....

Crime Scene Hot Pot Trivet

$24.30 from Amazon »

Even in death this victim continues contributing to society, protecting your countertops and tablecloths from scorching. From crime scene to hot pot holder, I think it's fair to call this dude the ultimate giver, and...

Burglar Blaster

$595 from Burglar Blaster »

Burglar Blaster, the DIY Home Security System, Scenario 1: It's late. You're in the living room watching your DVR of Michigan about to bone it in the tournament after two rounds of respectable action (sorry, Cornelius...

Ice Cream Sandwich Bench

$950 from Jellio »

To quote Freddie Mercury, "Is this real life? Or is it just fantasy?" Let's see...well, according to the $950 subtotal in my Jellio shopping cart, it is real life. Oh boy! Real life now has furniture that looks like ice...

Wall Scrabble

Hey, it's Scrabble for the Jumbo Crosswords crowd. But $20 says more people will spell words wrong trying to maneuver their letters in supersized form. Seriously, the alphabet's way harder to manage when it's big (case...

Batman Keyboard Stickers

$11 from Etsy »

While my ideal Bat Key would start the ignition to a Batmobile, I guess one that makes an X on my computer screen will suffice until I raise $620,000 and learn how to drive a stick. Etsy artist Anya's Batman Keyboard...

Parajet SkyRunner

$119k from Sky Runner »

If I had $119,000 to drop on a vehicle, I'd probably still pick a Tesla, but like the SCOUT carbon paramotor, I do appreciate the Parajet SkyRunner's ingenuity. Part ATV, part light-sport aircraft, all the fun of dangerous...

Karma Go LTE Hotspot

Pre-order Karma's latest personal, portable, pocket-sized hotspot, the Karma Go with nationwide LTE coverage, plus 1GB of free data. Just $99 from Dude Exclusives. That's 33% off the $149 retail price....

1 Gallon Stainless Steel Flask

$25.43 from Amazon »

I was doing some soul searching for ways in which I might class up my life, and not 5 minutes in, as if poised to instantly answer my prayers, I locked eyes with this gallon-sized flask. Isn't it beautiful? Brushed finish....

Stash Waterproof Pocket Shorts

Discontinued

Sometimes people do stupid shit, such as get extremely drunk and ornery on the 4th of July and refuse to respond to reason and jump off the deck of a Carver 54 motor yacht...twice...without taking their brand new iPhones...

4D Cityscape Puzzles

$24.99 - $46.42 from Amazon »

The 4th dimension is time. 4D puzzles of famous skylines--including Westeros from Game of Thrones!--sprawl width- and lengthwise, rise vertically with scale-model buildings, and cap their dimensional empire with the axis...

LEGO Kitchen Utensils

$34.99 from ThinkGeek »

This LEGO-esque utensil set makes me want to glue interlocking bricks to everything I own for easy wall storage on a baseplate. Belts, hats, game controllers, wallets, phone cases, underwear. I could wallpaper my entire...

Lansky BladeMedic Knife Sharpener

$10.84 from Amazon »

Over 300 Lansky BladeMedic knife sharpener reviewers have geeked out and waxed poetic about its astute capabilities and all-around magnificence. As for me, the last time I tried to sharpen a steak knife I lost a small...

Mace Pepper Spray Gun

$41.56 from Amazon »

Good news, Ralphie Parker. The whole point of the Mace Pepper Gun is to shoot an eye out. Using patented Bag-in-a-Can technology--ooh, that sounds...the opposite of intimidating--the pistol's system enables loaded cartridges...

JoeyBra Pocketed Bra

Sold Out from Amazon »

If you or a lady you know is not fortunate enough to have cleavage sized for stashing cash, phones, and plastic, I recommend a boob job. Or, I suppose, a JoeyBra. JoeyBras are designed to provide hands-free storage of...

Crypteks USB Drive

Discontinued

Digital passwords, encryption software, purity rings, and LDS allegiance all claim to guard the goods, but they don't physically lock them. Said goods are still vulnerable to breaches, negligence, or too many shots of...

Siva Cycle Atom - Human-Powered Generator

$99 from Siva Cycle »

When the Siva Cycle Atom says it wants some manpower, it wants some mother F'ing manpower. (Note: It will also accept elbow [knee?] grease from ladies.) An efficient, rechargeable block of pooled current, the Atom mounts...

KFC Chicken Corsage

$20 from KFC »

A corsage with a big fat KFC fried chicken leg nestled in the center. That might be the one thing I'd consent to reliving high school for. Can you imagine how good promfuls of girls flailing chicken wrists on the dance...

Ontario ASEK - Aircrew Survival Egress Knife

$107.28 from Amazon »

Following WWII, the US Army Aviation Branch sought to upgrade their soldiers' Aircrew Survival Egress Knives, or ASEKs. Required specs included: the ability to cut through both aircraft bodies and acrylic/glass windows;...

Stuff-a-Burger Press

$7.97 from Amazon »

At Rutgers University in New Jersey they have these food trucks--the Grease Trucks--that have been around since way before food trucks became the hipster way of the world and particularly the Pacific Northwest and particularly...

Super Mario Latex Dress

$205 from Etsy »

Hot. Sexy. Latex. When I think of Mario Bros. those are definitely the first 3 words that come to mind. And this latex dress captures that perfectly. I wonder how sweaty I would get if I tried to put that thing on? Not...

Retro Nintendo iPhone 6 Cases

For every piece of new, cutting edge technology humans create they must also resurrect an equal and opposite piece of technology from the 80s for old time's sake. It's Newton's Third Law. So if you have, or plan to get...

Litter Kwitter

$49.95 from Amazon »

Yes, the Litter Kwitter is a real thing. Vendor Firebox, known for their elaborate April Fool's pranks, repeatedly assures us that this seeming 20-pound chocolate Lionel Richie head of cat supplies is not a joke. So now...

Gun Lamps

$175 - $525 from Etsy »

Tired of taking shots in the dark? Then how about a little bang! bang! that lights up the night? Ryan Weigner hand-finesses ceramics slipcast-style to create illuminating firearms in 9mm sconce and table, as well as AK-47...

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Giveaway Entry Is Closed
DriDown Zissou 6 Sleeping Bag

Giveaway: DriDown Zissou 6 Sleeping Bag

Enter to win your 700-fill of feathers with a Sierra Designs DriDown Zissou 6 sleeping bag (a $340 value!)...

Darth Vader Planetarium

$54.85 from Amazon »

Good Star Wars Day to you. May the 4th bring you good cheer, good beer, and good rear. And most of all, May the 4th be with you!...

Analog Wood Watches

$149.99 from Analog Watch Co. »

Upcycling and eco-friendly practices are fast becoming commonplace in the design world. Sometimes even with results that aren't an abomination to the eye. Like Analog Watch Co.'s wood watches, which, on the contrary...

Kane Leather Harley-Davidson Jacket

$475 - $525 from Harley-Davidson »

Though it's not exactly riding weather in many parts of the US this winter, I'm guessing this Kane leather riding jacket from Harley-Davidson will still keep the men who wear it from freezing their asses off walking from...

Finger Hands

$4.95 from Archie McPhee »

Finger Hands. Horrifying. Pure. Horror. And I thought Man Hands were hilarious. How can there be such a disparity between undersized and oversized? Archie McPhee tries to make it all seem fun 'n' clever by pointing out...

Fighting Man Frying Pan

$45 - $250 from Morlock Enterprises »

Even if your kitchen crusades consist of little more than scrambling eggs or, like my dad, changing other men's lives by showing them how to use a skillet to reheat day-old pizza to its just-delivered splendor, the...

The Bierstick

$29.95 from Bierstick »

So long beer bong. Pump up to 24 ounces of cold, tasty, inhibition stealing beer down your gullet in less than two seconds with the Bierstick. It's like a 2x multiplier for having fun. You're gonna have fun anyway......

Deep Tea Diver Tea Strainer

Sold Out from Amazon »

My friend Esteban lives on a boat and at the end of the summer every year he hires a diver to scrounge around the water at the bottom of his slip to try to recover the myriad items he and his friends drop over the side...

OxyLED Eye Care Desk Lamp

$47.99 from Amazon »

L-E-Ds that don't make you want to crawl under your desk and take an N-A-P. (The OxyLED desk lamp will leave that to conference calls and the Ben Stein you've scored as a boss.) This ultra-low voltage and low temp light...

Objects in Mirror Are Losing Decal

$1.95 - $6.99 from Amazon »

Now drive slow, honey, it's not a race. Ha! Clearly that bit of motherly wisdom is a crock, as indicated by this vehicle manufacturer-issued decal right here on my side view mirror. It is a race, Mama. And all of those...

Dragon Scale Leather Armor

$639.99 from Etsy »

Dragon slaying dudes saw their wicked set of leather armor featured a few months ago, so now, ladies, it's your turn. John McGovern is peddling this handcrafted Dragon Scale Leather Armor to badasses of the female persuasion....

Glow In The Dark Graffiti

Sold Out from Amazon »

The nocturnal trouble maker's dream. Powered with UV light, you can now tarnish bridges, overpasses and subway stations without fear of your genius being hidden once the sun goes down. It's very complicated vandalism...

HB Pencil Lamp

$1,640 from Michael & George »

All that's missing are the teeth marks. Michael & George pay homage to hardness and blackness with their HB Lamp, a 5-1/2' floor light shaped like a pencil. In and of itself a lamp created in the image of a #2 isn't that...

DrunkQuest - A Fantasy Drinking Game

$30 from Amazon »

It's Dungeons & Dragons for the boozin' 21+ crowd. DrunkQuest combines fast-paced card game mechanics with shades of the D&D fantasy world with a few 6-packs and a liter or two of Captain Morgan for a party game of competitive...

Ghostbusters Proton Backpack Replica

$850 - $1,500 from Etsy »

It's Friday the 13th. Do you feel the eeriness? The rumblings of misfortune and chaos? Look outside. Is there something strange in your neighborhood? Anything weird that don't look good? Well forget about the phone. There's...

Neurocam - Brainwave-Based Camera

According to Forbes magazine, 2014 is bringing back tight-rolled jeans headgear. Thankfully, most of it won't connect to braces or interfere with beer consumption like Joan Cusack's in Sixteen Candles, but much will look...

Ole Smoky Moonshine

The Ole Smoky Moonshine family has honed the art of whiskey makin' since the early days of Smoky Mountain settlement. Distilling was a way to survive during hard times, both in terms of economics and, we presume, morale....

Kids Ultimate Bearded Beanie

Discontinued

The bearded beanie is a perfect way to keep your kid warm and make him look like he has a beard. I have a feeling that it is also a great way to torment your kid, give him an itchy face, and possibly have lasting effects...

District 9 Prawn Rifle & Claw

Discontinued

An ultra-realistic and functional prawn assault rifle from the movie District 9. Really cool collectors item for enthusiasts and a perfect Halloween costume for someone who likes being encumbered by their Halloween costume...

Bushcraft 101 Wilderness Survival Guide

$13.59 from Amazon »

You can buy the gear with a few mouse clicks, but once it's loaded onto your back and holstered around your paracord belt, will you know how to put it to good use? In his Bushcraft 101: A Field Guide to the Art of Wilderness...

The Ultimate Deck - 54 Unique Playing Cards

$24.95 - $64.95 from Dan & Dave »

Each of the 54 cards in Dan & Dave's Ultimate Deck brandishes a unique piece of artwork courtesy of design agency Stranger & Stranger. And yes, most of them are macabre and vaguely disturbing like the Unicorn Head Mask...

Nightstand Dog House

$499.95 - $599.95 from Hammacher Schlemmer »

This nightstand with a built-in dog house looks swell until you see it with the dog closed inside. Then it looks like a solitary confinement chamber used for enemy spies. And even if your dog chews and pees on things...

Countertop Dishwasher

$221.99 from Amazon »

Hmmm, does my desire not to wash dishes by hand supersede my desire to microwave Hot Pockets? It's not even a rhetorical question. Even though SPT's countertop dishwasher says it will fit beneath most kitchen cabinetry...

Harley Quinn Leggings

She's just been let loose to wreak havoc and revenge in Batman: Arkham City. Harley Quinn's equally deadly next stop? Ladies' legs. And this time, her weapon of choice is an explosive cocktail of Polyester and Spandex....

The Periodic Table of Middle Earth

$15 from LOTR Project »

Featuring characters from The Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit, I'd say The Periodic Table of Middle Earth would rank very close to the top of a list of Geekiest Items a Human Being Could Own. (I specified human being...

Bilbo Baggins Bonsai Home

By: Flickr »

Whatever, I could make a Bilbo Baggins Bag End Bonsai. Or I could if I had the meticulous, exacting hands of a surgeon. But then I'd probably just be a surgeon because I bet it pays more than selling miniature Japanese...

R2D2 Helmet

If they're gonna make us wear helmets when we ride our bikes, then we might as well make a powerful fashion statement while following their rules. Enter the R2D2 helmet. Girl has some skills. Pretty cute too....

Digital Cordless Jump Rope

$14.25 from Amazon »

Unlike a BLT without the bacon or a stripper without the boobies, a jump rope without the rope might actually be an improvement upon the original. First of all, a lot of people are good at jumping up and down (yes, I'm...

Infinity Hammock

Sold Out from Amazon »

If you're into swinging and threesomes, the Infinity Hammock...will do nothing to help your cause. Unless you're into the kind of swinging threesomes wherein each party has his or her own personal space amidst a cocoon...

Signal Solar Hybrid Snowboard

No laws or public service announcements about texting & boarding yet, right? Perfect. Because that's exactly what Signal's Solar Hybrid snowboard was designed for....

Interactive Ferrofluid Sculptures

Discontinued

In researching all of the uses for Interactive Ferrofluid Sculptures, I found myself continuously returning to one standout: time waster. The hypnotizing borosilicate glass vials filled with mutable elemental amoebas...

OMsignal Biometric Apparel

Here's a neat product for people who like to nettle and bore friends and strangers to the edge of death with news of their ailments, injuries, stress levels, and overall health. You want to converse about your state of...

Glo-Toob Virtually Indestructible Light

$13.93 - $29.99 from Amazon »

The Glo-toob is a banded top for ladies that burns swooning neon green, blue, red, white, or amber straight from their chesticular areas to your heart. Oh wait, no. Wrong glowing product that sounds like "boob". Correction:...

Doomed Skull Shot Glass

$3.53 from Amazon »

Adopting its name from Mayan lore, the Doomed Skull Shot Glass is here to help you ring in the apocalypse. It won't ward off zombies or cataclysmic solar flares or anthrax-laced rain drops, but it will get you so wasted...

Air-Fi Noise-Isolating Bluetooth Headphones

$59.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

The Air-Fi Metro2 Bluetooth headphones provide crystal clarity and noise isolation at 40% off retail price for a limited time. Get them for just $59.99 from the Dude Exclusives online store....

His & Hers Star Wars Rings

$650 from Etsy »

I like the idea of the Force being with me, but I also like the idea of stuff. With one of these Star Wars rings I will still be able to envision and harness the power of an intangible Force, but, more importantly, I'll...

Awaglass Soap Bubble Timer

$11.99 from Amazon »

Here at last to keep track of your 60-second increments of time: soapy water. Fill the Awaglass bubble timer with H2O and dish soap, shake it up, and marvel at the brilliant mind of a Japanese dude with so much time on...

Octopus Couch

$71,633 from Switch Modern »

Really this couch is called the Aster Papposus Sofa, but who knows what the hell an aster papposus is? I can't even pronounce those words together, and have just resorted to reading them as Snuffleupagus. To whom the...

Bear Grylls Ultimate Survival Kit

Sold Out from Amazon »

This is some real MacGyver shit right here. This kit has absolutely everything. And even though Bear Grylls was found to be a big fake and a liar and a fraud and gay, this survival kit will save your ass the next time...

Zombie Lawn Flamingo

$13.69 from Amazon »

On the one hand, it's almost time to decorate for Halloween, so a zombie lawn flamingo would be a very wise purchase. And on the other hand, it's always time to class up the front yard, so a zombie lawn flamingo would...

Handbook for the Recently Deceased

$29.95 from Etsy »

This Handbook for the Recently Deceased contains 220 blank pages. I don't know if that's better or worse than Adam and Barbara Maitland's gibberish-filled version. Perhaps better, as at least buyers can fill this one...