A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Saturday, June 8, 2013
$17.80 from Amazon »

Gators and ostrich and bears, oh my...dayum! Giving bacon gift boxes and Broquets a possible run for their money this Father's Day: Buffalo Bob's Wild Game Jerky. The sampler pack....

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Instead of outgrowing your superhero, fairytale, and cartoon character childhood toys, let them mature with you. Preserve their magnificence, and thwart being labeled a creepy action figure nerd, with Evil Robot Designs' Bespoke...

Wednesday, February 5, 2014
$39 from Topatoco »

Brandon Bird created this Squid Flame hoodie, a clever piece of gear for all the fans of fantastical sea beasts and marine biologists out there. It is unclear, though, if Bird or someone on online retailer Topatoco's payroll came up with this gem of wisdom to promote it: If only Ryan Gosling had known about this hoodie he wouldn't have been forced to suffer the indignity of prancing around in that...

Tuesday, October 15, 2013
$59.98 from Amazon »

Here's a blast from Halloween past. And not just OG, circa 1978 Michael Meyers, OG 2.0, circa 1998 Michael Meyers too. Remember when they released the Halloween H20 remake to celebrate the series' 20th anniversary? And Jamie...

Sunday, December 16, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Of course I don't need a mitten-koozie hybrid so that I may drink chilled alcoholic beverages in freezing temperatures, one right after another like the gluttonous, midwestern lush that I am, without rendering my delicate...

Saturday, April 20, 2013
Discontinued

Yoda pipe? Yes, I'll take one. I will also take one six-piece Chicken McNugget, a dozen Doritos Locos tacos, a deep dish pepperoni pizza with extra sauce, and three large Oreo Mint Blizzards. Thank you, and Happy 4/20....

Tuesday, May 15, 2012
$64.95 from Amazon »

Life-sized is still a few feet away, but this giant Chewbacca plush toy measures in at a formidable 24" tall x 15" wide. Which is probably bigger than the kid you're going to pretend you're buying him for. And when you press...

Wednesday, November 21, 2012
$1,095 from Oru Kayak »

The San Francisco Bay Area: Big waters, small living spaces, crowded streets, zero parking. Because Anton Willis loves to kayak, and because he isn't a whiner who sits around complaining about problems instead of doing something...

Sunday, June 30, 2013
$59.95 from myType »

I'll tell you one thing I like is buttons. This touch screen crapola, even when it's all cool and laser virtual keyboard-y and keychain-sized, is unacceptable to my manly and powerful hands. They just do not like typing on...

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Otherworldly neon suction cups for the legs! Artist James Lillis took a NASA photo of an actual galaxy, and transposed it onto tongue-waggingly tight leggings in purples and blues so riveting anyone who gazes upon them will...

Tuesday, April 2, 2013
$20 from black + blum »

Not only is a polar bear ice cube tray adorable and perfect for assuaging the injuries of children who hurt themselves doing something stupid that you told them not to, but the design itself is also highly utilitarian, solving...

Saturday, August 3, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I'd imagine a concern for all parents, but particularly male parents, is having a baby and then accidentally dropping it. Or tucking it snoozing in its carrier under the table at the bar so it will be out of the way, and then...

Saturday, June 15, 2013
$7.62 from Amazon »

Well, Prism Glasses for reading in bed or Prism Glasses for reading while lying flat on your back on the hood of someone's Honda Civic after you wake up from a drunken pass out and need to smartphone your way into determining...

Monday, September 2, 2013
$32 from Best Made »

This is a nice cup. It's sturdy--steel coated with enamel, double-thick on the handle and rim to defray those areas' proportionately high use and abuse. Also it has "Steadfast" and "Best Made" stamped in large letters all...

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Here are some problems with not brushing your teeth: brown teeth; hot buttered ass breath. Here are some problems with brushing your teeth regularly: gum recession due to hard bristles and/or overzealous brushing techniques;...

Thursday, January 24, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Admittedly, when I think "dogfight", the next words that pop into my head aren't typically "helium balloons". However, I am learning to be more creatively minded. For example, I recently applied cream cheese to my all-beef...

Wednesday, January 1, 2014
$116.56 from Amazon »

Happy New Year! Here's something to make you feel fat, ugly, and depressed motivate and inspire you to reach your 2014 fitness goals! The Fitbit Aria Wi-Fi Smart Scale measures weight, body fat percentage, and body mass index...

Tuesday, March 19, 2013
$145 from Amazon »

Sunglasses. They can become as iconic as the people whose eyes they cover. Like the ones that Aykroyd and Belushi wore in The Blues Brothers. That Tom Cruise wore in Top Gun. That Ray Charles wore in...life. And now, from...

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Wedding cakes have been topped with zombies. Video game junkies. Your own face. But have you ever seen one topped with an infinite web of sugar spun in 3 out of 3 dimensions? The Sugar Lab will custom make 3D printed sugar...

Thursday, May 16, 2013
$27 from Etsy »

Designer Samantha Ulrich calls this her Googly Eyed Monster Mug, I guess due to Sesame Street's having a corner on the market of using the words "Cookie" and "Monster" consecutively. Which, on the one hand, is kind of BS seeing...

Wednesday, September 18, 2013
$279 from GNR 8 »

The Mirror 180's joined splices allow it to tilt and reposition such that it reflects many a splendid thing. Namely, a more comprehensive view of me. One half of the mirror angles into 3 different positions, suiting a bevy...

Wednesday, December 19, 2012
$89.99 from Etsy »

Aaahhh! Sensory overload! Star Wars, comic books, low cut, short skirt, hot girl...too many pleasing stimuli for my sensitive male ecosystem to process. Now this is a New Year's Eve dress if I've ever seen one....

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

The days of old school Nintendo Zappers and Duck Hunt have come full circle. Except this time the Zapper is souped up with a 2W+ blue laser, and can blast real ducks. Or at least light paper ducks on fire. DIY extraordinaires...

Tuesday, November 12, 2013
$16 from Firebox.com »

What is, a man who ate his daughter's 1st birthday cake without a fork, Alex? No? What is...a makeshift Fraggle mask? No? OK, then how about you just tell me why this man has neon pink goo smeared on his face, Mr. Trebek?...

Wednesday, June 5, 2013
$27 - $100 from Havoc Boards »

Havoc Boards. Fifteen custom-designed maps of cities, countries, and regions either printed on professional grade gaming board or engraved in solid wood, and primed for your Mark "The Undertaker" Calaway-style total domination....

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

The Hybrid Race Replica, or HRR, Motorcyle is a material science concept racing bike that harnesses the power of 1 million babies, er, I mean the sun, with its thin film solar paint, as well as colleccts clean backup power...

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Now that flavored vodkas have started to peak in trendiness--I saw Cilantro over the weekend--and most states are prohibiting smoking inside public places, it's only natural that some enterprising company would bring Tobacco...

Saturday, September 7, 2013

It's the double helix of your literary life. And remember, there's a 50/50 chance its contents will get passed down to your kids, so maybe try filling it with something other than comic books, porn, and smooth jazz, 'ey?...

Wednesday, July 10, 2013
$5.99 from Amazon »

Despite the ominous reputation it's earned by way of musical theater and Rick Moranis (hey, two completely relevant references to Rick Moranis in a week!) the Venus flytrap is a pretty lame carnivore. Kind of like girls who...

Saturday, October 27, 2012
$275 from Hard Point »

In life, it's important to possess three things with a pistol grip: a pistol; a hairdryer; and a Manticuda knife. Designed for ease of access and supreme thrusting power, the steel Manticuda's fixed blade and 90-degree bend...

Bar
Monday, January 21, 2013
$12 from Gama Go »

Not just an ice skull, but an ice skull with geometric lines and bends that make it look like some sort of diamond or crystal Indiana Jones-style ice skull. Astonishing what they can do with plastic molds these days. Just...

Wednesday, September 18, 2013
$2,299.99 from Entertainment Earth »

My life-size Iron Man statue needs a buddy. Or a nemesis so I can choreograph elaborate sparring bouts for the two of them in my head. Or how about Tony Stark can be my super-ego and this 6' tall stormtrooper my id, and together...

Wednesday, January 23, 2013
$150 - $160 from NFNT »

The Big Face Woody. Is the name alone not reason enough to pledge our support of Oahu designer NFNT's bamboo watch? I wonder how many people inadvertently stumble across this eco-friendly wooden timepiece during Google searches...

Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Dogs. Always wanting to do everything their humans do. Drink beer. Hog the bed. Hump ladies' legs. And while they've mastered the latter two, minus the times a drunk guest sneaks them a few swigs during holiday parties, dogs...

Wednesday, April 18, 2012
$11.99 from Amazon »

Installing Jonny Glow strips on your toilet will preclude stubbed toes, bumped knees, smacked elbows, total face plants, and pissing on the cat during semi-conscious orienteering trips to the bathroom in the pitch black of...

Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Discontinued

Android meets virtual reality meets music meets...cat. Does the Finger Piano really need the Japanese qualifier for anyone to guess where it's from? One note per finger, plus three notes on the wrist, equals a full octave...

Friday, January 11, 2013
Discontinued

Christmas: Over. Valentine's Day: Dammit! Still to come. But get your wife/girlfriend/favorite cheese girl at the Whole Foods a Star Wars Death Star Heart Necklace, and you'll both check another gift off your list and make...

Monday, February 20, 2012
$79 from Photo Jojo »

March Madness looms. Imagine sitting amidst a heated, neck-and-neck Final 4 battle during which you could simultaneously film: the epic panorama of on-court action to the right; a head coach about to soil himself screaming...

Bar
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
$90.61 - $98.88 from Amazon »

When the tops come off, the fun begins! That's what they say about these bottle cap bar stools, but I don't see much about the statement that has anything to do with bottle cap bar stools. Obviously I like it as it relates...

Wednesday, July 3, 2013
$14.10 from Amazon »

If they were going to craft a Scarface garden gnome aiming an M16A1, you would think they could have also added some Al Pacino droopy eyes and a pouty mouth underneath that Santa Claus beard. As it stands--at only 9-1/2" tall...

Wednesday, April 3, 2013
$5.50 - $23 from Etsy »

Honey-spiced locusts from A Feast of Ice and Fire's Essos chapter may be a more authentic dessert to serve at your next Game of Thrones viewing party, but...ew. That sounds disgusting. Aren't locusts bugs? People from Essos...

Friday, October 5, 2012
$25 - $65 from Amazon »

This Halloween, dress like you grew up in Iowa. The many men of Slipknot have many faces, most of them incredibly disturbing and fitting for a night of scaring the ever-loving sweet Jesus out of kiddos and seniors and maybe...

Sunday, February 19, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

When one talks about harnessing the power of the dragon, a 24.5-inch soul-reaping Draconic knife is second pretty much only to the ancient bloodline, and fearless nudity, of Daenerys Targaryen. A formidable slice-and-dice...

Monday, November 11, 2013
$35.17 from Amazon »

This Password Vault seems like a decent gift for people who, like me, follow the universal password rules of choosing a different protective code of at least 8 characters, half of which are symbols or caps, for every one of...

Wednesday, September 11, 2013
$19.98 from Amazon »

Dish Soap + Cast Iron Cookware = Very Bad Cleaning Method. But evidently, Chainmail + Cast Iron Cookware = World's Best Pot and Pan Scrubber. The CM Scrubber looks like a cross between a potholder and the second ugliest shoes...

Tuesday, November 19, 2013
$599 from Amazon »

Some people believe that a blaring alarm shattering the silence of our slumber and tearing our eyes open in the still-blackness of a winter morning isn't so good for the body. Philips, makers of the Wake-Up Light and alarm...

Tuesday, November 26, 2013
$37 from Amazon »

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, and people who live in marble towers should watch out because...bombs away! MindWare's Q-Ba-Maze 2.0 is an interlocking system of brightly-hued cubes that tinkerers small...

Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Discontinued

In discussing the Back to the Future DeLorean external hard drive with my friend Bartholomew, he raised a couple of fair questions: 1) 750 GB for $385?! What, is that an October 26, 1985 storage capacity and technology price...

Saturday, August 24, 2013
$59 from SpitJack »

Isn't there a Meat Is Torture bumper sticker out there? I think the SpitJack Magnum Meat Injector Gun is about to inspire its antagonist: Torture Your Meat. This thing looks ominous. Like a kitchen tool I want emphatically...

Thursday, October 4, 2012
$19.95 from Amazon »

I don't know how I feel about painting pregnant bellies for public display. Well, maybe it would be cool if one were painted with waves and then the small human being inside started kicking and fighting to get out and made...

Monday, September 19, 2011

These little guys remind me of the characters in the movie 9. This collaboration is pretty cool and comes with a back story and a rabid internet fan base. Each "squadt" can stand alone, or form a part of a large collection....

Thursday, February 14, 2013
$225 from Beta Brand »

I don't usually smoke, but when I do, I also like to dress up like a Red Dragon, wear a monocle--in both eyes--and sip whiskey out of my Swig & Puff Flask. I also like when the dragon costume is subtle enough to wear to work....

Tuesday, July 17, 2012
$387k from Lamborghini »

When the Dark Knight rises he'll be chillin' in carbon fiber, revving a 700 HP V12 engine, and surging from 0 to 62 mph in 2.9 seconds. The Lamborghini Aventador LP 700-4 makes its big screen debut--and probably one of its...

Wednesday, May 9, 2012
$15.94 from Amazon »

Know what sucks about a bacon cheeseburger? OK, besides nothing. What sucks is when you sink your teeth into its crispy-juicy tag team of flesh, and the bacon doesn't break cleanly. When an entire, mayonnaise-laden strip slides...

Wednesday, May 16, 2012
$129.99 from Etsy »

Diablo III saw its May 15, 2012 release plagued by the most wretched of all the Prime Evils: Error 3006. That's why it's always better to stick with the classics. Original issue NES Diablo may be an ancient one by laws of...

Thursday, February 14, 2013
$466 from Studio Toer »

Possible Dome Stool Disclaimer: "Toer designed a stool that gives the appearance of sitting on air." Appearance? As in looks like one is sitting on air, not that one experiences the buttock tactile sensation of sitting on...

Tuesday, December 10, 2013
$28.88 from Amazon »

Beware ye who enter the the Cave of Caerbannog without backup in the form of cozy, yet stylish, footwear. Officially licensed by Monty Python--with a snarl-and-sap of approval from the Killer Rabbit himself--these snaggletoothed...

Friday, October 26, 2012

Nothing like a little colorful latex with cockamamie explanations of what you did to require bandage coverage to make paper cuts, minor dicing mishaps, and drunken tumbles look a little more admirable. Each box of What Happened?...

Monday, October 29, 2012

La Scala's pimped-out jacuzzi, termed a "Jetted Entertainment Bath", is just another in a long line of life's Catch-22 creations. It costs $40 grand, so if I could convince the bank to give me a loan for it, I'd probably have...

Friday, July 5, 2013
$9.38 from Amazon »

What can I say about the Tetris sandwich cutter except that it cuts sandwiches into shapes based on the all-time best of all games of all time? UNO can barely crawl out of its little paper carton in the presence of Tetris...

Sunday, May 26, 2013
$749.99 from Amazon »

If its photographic depictions are accurate, the Rainforest Rapids amusement park is an inflatable backyard installation suitable for both wet and dry bouncy-bouncy fun, as well as both small children who want to splash in...

Saturday, September 21, 2013
$6.95 - $15.95 from Amazon »

Bizarro fiction author Cameron Pierce has won awards for his fantastical, trippy, borderline psychotic tales of what life could be like if we all made better use of our imaginations, and consumed many, many tabs of acid. His...

Sunday, June 3, 2012
$325 from Amazon »

Ahhh, summertime. Smells like freshly cut...margaritas. Thanks to the TailGator, a blender with cajones the size of a 25cc Poulan 2-stroke, 2 1/2 horsepower gas engine. It's not a new product--or the only one of its kind for...

Sunday, April 29, 2012
Discontinued

Is it funny 'cause it's true? The witty, yet unfortunate Video Game Junkie Wedding Cake Topper is a Cynthia Niles custom design, made to order with a jumbo flat screen, and whatever gaming image, console & hand controller...

Friday, December 6, 2013
$31.08 from Amazon »

If your kids are afraid of Santa the jolly bearded fat man, just dress up as Santa the faceless creeper in the second skin bodysuit and show them what real terror is. Ho, ho, ho, an ocelot ate my face! Now I spread Christmas...

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Ok, guys, here's your mannequin. Now all you need is a couple of brassieres and the skills imparted by Gary and Wyatt to send you from single and living alone to Konichiwa, mon amour. I am at your service. This French Maid...

Tuesday, December 18, 2012
$17.65 - $26.77 from Amazon »

Almost as interesting as it will be to watch the effects of my grandpa ingesting 4 pounds of processed sugar a la Slo Pokes, Red Hots, and Chuckles on Christmas morning is noting that, of the wax-wrapped candy treats contained...

Tuesday, March 12, 2013
$312 - $412 from Hail Protector »

"Are you tired of being a victim of hail and living in fear of hail damage?" That's, no joke, Hail Protector's opening line. I think they stole their copy from a domestic violence Website. Let's see what else: "...pounding...