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Dear Cab Driver Napkins

By: on October 19, 2011
  • Dear Cab Driver Napkins
$19.99
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You've made the right decision (for once) and decided to call a cab instead of brave the old one-eye closed serpentine in your own ride. Good choice. Now for the tough part. Where do you live? Whip one of these babies out, give your friend a sharpie and you're as good as home.

Pro player tip: When in NYC at 3am, simply writing "The Hilton" will not suffice and proper use of the alcohol by volume glass can prevent the situation all together.

In contrast, proper use of the 2 beer bong can lead to napkin necessity.

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Stormtrooper Whiskey Decanter & Shot Glass

$14.61 - $26.79 from The Fowndry »

A stormtrooper who's packing nothing but Jameson and a Buttery Nipple is my kind of stormtrooper. I bet in whiskey decanter and suspended glass forms they're even a decent shot. At least until round 7 or 8 when your own...

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Dual Beer Glass

$35 from Etsy »

At first I thought the Dual Beer Glass was intended for sampling two different types of beers at once, and I was like, How the dickens am I supposed to keep one from spilling all over my crotch when I'm drinking the other?...

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Liquor Log Booze Dispenser

$99 from Amazon »

Now this is the kind of Yule Log I'm talking about. How better to bring good tidings to you and all of your kin than with a nice bottle of Jameson or Jack chug-a-lugging out the tap on an urban harvested Ohio hardwood...

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The Knockout Beer/Water/Gravity Bong

$40 from The Knockout »

I used to prefer my knockouts served as Fireball shots and right hooks, but this Knockout, a new twist on the beer bong, might leave those standards unconscious and bleeding from the ear on the floor. Designed for attachment...

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Gropener One-Handed Bottle Opener

$16 from Amazon »

No, Gropener is not what it looks like Uncle Harry is doing to Cousin Ricky's new girlfriend at the family reunion. Gropener is a smoosh-together of the words "grab" and "opener," done to signify what this clever tool...

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Igloo Party Bar Cooler with LiddUp Lighting

$154.37 from Amazon »

The Igloo Party Bar Cooler keeps the party lit up all night long courtesy of LiddUp technology. About 4 years ago, startup LiddUp sought crowdfunding for its own illuminated cooler. The campaign didn't quite hit its goal...

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Biersafe Underground Beer Cooler

$67 - $117 from Biersafe »

The Biersafe Underground Beer Cooler is a smaller, simpler, and much cheaper version of a design I first saw in the eCool cooler. The Biersafe removes some of the nifty engineering of the eCool - like, instead of using...

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Snake Venom - World's (New) Strongest Beer

$78 from Firebox.com »

At this time last year, the World's Strongest Beer was Armageddon, a 330 mL bottle of malt, hops, a little sweetness, and an awesome 65% ABV crafted by Scottish brewery Brewmeister. This year, the World's New Strongest...

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Vapshot Vaporized Alcohol System

$1,299 from Vapshot »

The Vapshot Mini Home System is a countertop liquor vaporizer. It looks kinda like an air pump at the gas station. It acts kinda like one too. Except instead of pumping on a hose to inflate your Goodyears, you'll suck...

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Beer Tree Gravity-Fed Home Brewer

Are normal home brewing kits typically boring and ugly? I don't really know, as I focus more on drinking beer than making beer (best to funnel all of your energy into a single channel and dominate it!) but whatever normal...

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Aura Glass - Spill Resistant Aerating Glassware

$59.95 from Aura Glass »

Since most of us spin and swish our glasses of wine and whiskey to aerate them anyway, Aura Glass has come up with a (mighty fine looking, I must say) way to do it without sloshing the wine and whiskey all over the table....

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Stanley Stein Hockey Beer Mug

$84.99 from Amazon »

I don't always watch hockey, but when I do...I prefer to do it drunk of my ass so I find it more entertaining. This beer mug incarnation of the Stanley Cup looks like a great way to achieve drunk off my ass with a quickness....