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Star Wars: The Force Awakens Monopoly

By: on September 17, 2015

When The Force Awakens on the Monopoly board it's not about getting rich and hoarding real estate, it's about...uh...getting rich and hoarding planets. This newest edition of Star Wars' Monopoly takeover gives players a choice of battling for galactic control as either Rebel or Empire figurines. The game includes a mix of forthcoming Force Awakens characters and your favorite OGs from Episodes IV, V, and VI.

The Rebel Force controls Community Chest cards, while the Dark Side takes dibs on the Chance stack. Players work around the board trying to earn enough money to buy planets, where they can then set up a base. S/he who dominates the planets wins the galaxy. With this Force Awakens edition, the Monopoly board itself has also gotten a Millennium-Falcon-round makeover with a seizure-worthy spread of interstellar shapes and bright colors.

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Star Wars Chewbacca Beanbag

$169 - $279 from Pottery Barn »

The only thing wrong with this Chewbacca Beanbag, a Wookiee lounger my ass would otherwise love to plop down on, is that it's from Pottery Barn. Just like this Star Wars Bed. So basically the only people who can have...

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Star Wars Fitness Equipment

$64.95 - $199.95 from Onnit »

If you weren't sweating the Dark Side before, one round with Onnit's Star Wars fitness equipment, and I guarantee you'll start. From kettlebell swings to hot yoga, Russian twists to Turkish getups, Onnit is injecting...

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LEGO Star Wars Millennium Falcon 2017

$799.99 from LEGO »

Start saving your credits and wupiupi. LEGO is dropping a new Millennium Falcon model - a 7,500-piece behemoth of a brick freighter - on October 1, 2017. Need a gift for a man? Particularly a man you'd like to make very...

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Stormtrooper Whiskey Decanter & Shot Glass

$14.61 - $26.79 from The Fowndry »

A stormtrooper who's packing nothing but Jameson and a Buttery Nipple is my kind of stormtrooper. I bet in whiskey decanter and suspended glass forms they're even a decent shot. At least until round 7 or 8 when your own...

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littleBits Star Wars Droid Inventor Kit

$99.95 from Amazon »

Want your kids to learn a littleBits about tech as you secretly relish the interactive R2-D2 they're building? The Star Wars Droid Inventor Kit hit littleBits shelves just in time for Force Friday II....

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Wooden Cat Pile Stacking Game

$19.99 from Amazon »

This desktop-sized Wooden Cat Pile game is the only way I'd let another 6 cats in my house. The only! Do you hear that, She-Ra: Princess of Power? And agreeing even to that much is very generous of me. I can already see...

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Star Wars Return of the Jedi Wall Clock

$199.95 from Amazon »

The only thing missing from this Return of the Jedi wall clock is an R2-D2 head that pops out on the hour to go, Bee-boo-boop-coo-koo! Otherwise, it's all there. Electroluminescent lightsabers and LED glow from within:...

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Star Wars Adult Onesies

$64.45 from Amazon »

Star Wars onesies for adults are what's called being comfortably chic on Halloween, and F'ing awesome the other 364 days of the year. Boba Fett, R2-D2, a stormtrooper, and the grandaddy of being the worst daddy of all...

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Star Wars Storm Trooper Electric Shaver

$49.95 from Amazon »

They used the Force Friday on me and all I can see is Star Wars merch! The Storm Trooper Electric Shaver from Philips Norelco is another forthcoming (10/1/17) addition to the Star Wars: The Last Jedi frenzy....

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The Darth Knight

$1,500 from Ebay »

You love Batman, but you're a loyal Star Wars fanboy. Halloween is coming up and you have a difficult decision to make. Can you betray Darth Vader for your new crush on the Dark Knight? Good news. You won't have to. Mash...

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Boob Cube

$9.50 from Amazon »

The Boob Cube is for idiots. And for geniuses. And for idiots who want to convince people they're really geniuses. And for geniuses you want to make feel like idiots. So, yeah, pretty much an ideal gift for any person...

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Millennium Falcon Asteroid Coffee Table

$6,499 from Regal Robot »

The only thing this Millennium Falcon Asteroid Coffee Table is missing is my feet. As Han Solo and Chewie expertly maneuver their ship through an asteroid field to evade Vader and his fleet, I relax with a Bud Light Lime...