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Posted: Sunday, January 15, 2012
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Laser Laces

Laser Laces
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  • Laser Laces
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  • Laser Laces
  • Laser Laces
  • Laser Laces

Behold, the last frontier fiber optics had to conquer: your Air Jordans. Laser Laces are LED lights encased in a fiber optic cable that criss-cross up your insteps and mesmerize passersby. Especially high ones, and ones with epilepsy. The fiber optic cable protects the LED emission points, and keeps their glow constant, a feat rope lighting has be unable to do. Laces are 26 inches long, but can be cut with standard scissors to desired length. Battery operated and available in 7 colors of the visible neon spectrum, as well as all of the colors of the visible neon spectrum mashed together. Most importantly, they come with Vanessa Hudgens' seal of approval, as evidenced by her Laser Laced kicks in the music video for her postmodern masterpiece, "Sneakernight." Quick, someone grab a pair of Laser Laces, and run tell Punky Brewster, Rainbow Brite, and Boy George the window for their comebacks has officially opened!

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