Shoes

The Crocs Classic Cowboy Boot. Sigh. Dudes. Ladies. Throughout these pages, over these years, I feel I have already shared every insult, every disparaging remark, every ounce of hatred I have for Crocs "footwear." And...

The most interesting thing about these Hulkfoot Heels from I Wanna Bangkok isn't even that they are 2" pumps with giant, veiny green Hulk toes and arches growing out their front end. Nope. The most interesting thing about...

Are your feet ready to return to "an era where pixels fueled our wildest dreams?" Pixel Rider sneakers are a tribute to the pixelated lives - well, pixelated gaming lives, anyway - we all led in the 80s and 90s. Created...

Slide your feet into the Super Mario Bros. Piranha Plant Slippers, and enjoy plush comfort, 80s gaming nostalgia, and some serious pop culture drip. And the cost? Only...your life...

Feeling froggy today? Then guide those fidgety fingers, darting eyes, and doom-scrolling thumbs on over here, to a pair of Frog Clogs. I promise, amphibious footwear will be the most ribbeting thing you see online all...

Squishy, spiny, toothy, fruity, and now spooky. Cartoonish sandals are making a run for the Shoe of the Summer, or perhaps Shoe of the Shower, title. These Skull Sandals are one-piece molded EVA slides suitable for wear...

I don't think these hollow-soled massage sandals / shower shoes were 3D printed, but they sure do look like they belong at a family reunion with footwear that was. Zellerfelds. The Cryptide Adidas 4DFWDs. But, hey, if...

These Banana Flip-Flops better be non-slip. On the outside and on the inside. Because they may be fruity and fun to look at, but if this dude is going to wear a bunch of bananas on his feet, I need a guarantee they're...

You checked the weather before you left for your trip / hike / commute, but still, halfway in, the sky yells, Pokeboo! and unleashes a downpour. Good thing you can Pokeboo! right back if you've got your Pokeboo Packable...

It's officially spring, so naturally I am champin' at the bit to get to summer. These Suicoke Padri Sandals are about as summer-ready as they come, with a cush, walk-to-the-pool contoured footbed, and rubber sole sporting...

I know what a cloud is, and I think "lusso" means "luxe" or "lavish" in Italian, so if wearing a pair of Lusso Cloud's Scenario Comfort Slide feels like walking on a luxe or lavish cloud, then...well, don't sign me up...

Get ready to slip your feet into...your feet. Well, almost. Zellerfeld's forthcoming line of footwear will be entirely custom-fitted to the individual feet that walk in them, thanks to 3D printing and foot scanning technology...

Dude. You really gotta be an avid hiker to justify spending $245 on a pair of hiking shoes. I mean, VEJA's Fitz Roy Technical Hiking Shoes are nice enough and all, but...what? Basketball? Naw, dude. You don't need to...

What does your OO face look like? If OOFOS has done right with their OOmg Fibre Low Men's Shoe, it should feature droopy eyes, a slack, happy jaw, and possibly some drool. Like any other pair of OOFOS shoes or sandals...

Rechargeable Heated Slippers may be a boring, uninspired idea for a last-minute holiday gift, but they're not a bad idea. Think of all the people with cold feet out there. And all the people who have moderately warm feet...

So I guess the correct term is "Japanese Tabi Sneakers," but calling them "Cloven Sneakers" ensures the footwear's name is as attention-getting as their look. Not to mention, if you're gonna be hoofin' it to work, the...

Here's a slightly batty idea for Halloween. Batwings for your shoes! The leather flappers fit over the eyelets of your shoes or boots, and secure with your laces to create a festive vibe during spooky season, or a Goth...

The latest sign of the apocalypse? Yes, 7-Eleven Crocs, but not just 7-Eleven Crocs. 7-Eleven Crocs plus the fact that this is the second pair of cloggin' crocs I've written about in the span of a week! In - as the mastermind...

Crocs. Gotta love 'em for persisting in existing, and always pushing to stay relevant in the marketplace. Except I still hate 'em. All of 'em, including the new Crocs Crush Boot, which is essentially a more affordable...

Here we go again. Back to school. Into fall. And preparing for weather that will require us to wrap up in quilts, and slip our feet into boots, and, if you're Clarks Quilted Walllabee Boot, wrap up our feet in quilted...

My foot in your ass doesn't sound so bad when I'm wearing Rose in Good Faith's recycled sex toy shoes, 'eh? Called Plastic Soul, the slip-ons look like a cross between Crocs and New Balance 624 Dad sneaks, neither of...

The bad news: Solethreads Recliner Flip-Flops are not made from actual recliners. The good news: they're made from actual yoga mats instead. This is probably even better because, while recliners are indeed muy comfortable...

Trick out your kicks, make your sneaks snazzy, and jazz up your Jazzercise shoes (Mama) with this set of Shoe Tattoos from Wear Your Sole. The decals are semi-permanent, but removable, and made for enhancing leather footwear...

I like the sound of Massage Bubble Slides. But, come on, these are clearly Epcot Center Clogs. And the brown versions of the EVA foam footwear are Ballpark Peanut Sandals. And the pink ones? Lychee Slippers...