Ho. Ly. Balls. Does anyone have some Glow-in-the-Dark Toilet Paper, because I think I just crapped my pants. If one twisted, dagger-toothed, Joker-on-acid clown mask isn't enough for you this Halloween, how about a conjoined tag team of them? The Siamese Clown Mask covers your entire head, ensuring no facial feature that might reassure a small child you aren't actually a spawn of carnie hell peeks out and ruins the fun. Masks are vinyl, which means you will probably hotter than a steel playground at high noon while donning it, but, hey, a little heat stroke is a small price to pay for the power to elicit blood-curdling screams and maybe even a few heart attacks.