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Friendly Swede Paracord Bracelet with Fire Starter

$9.99 from Amazon »

The Swedes. Always lookin' out, always glad to do it. My favorite friendly Scandinavians made this paracord bracelet out of 16' of 350 spec nylon. Five different color choices are braided into a sweet adjustable wrist...

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Bartesian Capsule Cocktail Machine

$299 from Bartesian »

Now this is what I'm talkin' 'bout, Willis. Morning coffee from pods and K-cups? How about morning Sex on the Beach...and happy hour Margaritas...and night cap Martinis from the same tiny capsules? With an automated...

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SKEYE Mini Drone with HD Camera

$64.99 from »

Awww, Mama and Papa Drone made a baby. I wonder how that worked. Gimbal attachments, perhaps? The SKEYE Mini Drone is a tiny flying machine fitted with an HD camera. Together they are primed to record airborne stunts...

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Mako Pressure Point Restraining Tool

$13.96 from Amazon »

Next time someone calls me a tool, I think I'll say, "Thank you." And offer to show him how swell it feels when a tool digs his Mako-laced fingers right into that spot at the bottom-side of the neck....

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Tethercell AA Smart Battery Adapter

$24.49 from »

When I see the Tethercell smart battery adapter I think of parents with A) children and B) a-hole friends and family members who buy their children toys that play songs or make animal noises or blow horns. Over. And over....

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The Aperture Wrench

Wrenches and camera lenses: together at last. As it turns out, the seeming odd couple industrial designer Jordan Steranka paired up to create his Aperture Wrench concept is a completely logical and elegantly handy pair....

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Ninja Ultima Kitchen System

Sold Out from Amazon »

I was looking up ninja stuff on Amazon because...I'm a dude...and they kept showing me this blender and all of its 1,000 sellers and iterations. And I was like, "Stop showing me this damn effing blender, Amazon! I want...

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Colita De Rana Bug-Repellent Aloe

If you have a sunburn so bad it hurts to blink, that sucks. If you have a sunburn so bad it hurts to blink, and then you get bitten up by mosquitos such that even though several areas of your body are at Level 8 pain...

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ESCAPE Traveler

$65,400 - $72,800 from ESCAPE Traveler »

The ESCAPE Traveler definitely looks bigger on the inside. But I think that's more due to the trickery of those wide angle lenses the real estate industry loves using to take photos than a true touch of Whovian magic....

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Opinel No 8 Carbon Pocket Knife

$12.91 from Amazon »

One thing I've learned in life is that people like quality, people like deals, and people like knives. If you consider yourself people, then the Opinel No 8 Carbon pocket knife is your opportunity to have all 3 of these...

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Utopia Kitchen 6-Piece Knife Set

Sold Out from Amazon »

Here are some cheap knives with a sweet magnetic knife block and good reviews for sharpness, quality, durability, and ease of juggling. OK, I don't know about that last one, but it does seem that buyers dig Utopia Kitchen's...

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Nebia Atomized Water Showerhead

$299 from Nebia »

Nebia trademarked what they call H2MICRO technology. They say it takes the best parts of a shower and a steam room and sprays it out of overhead and portable wand nozzles in a way that will make you feel like you're in...

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Mini Weapons of Mass Destruction: Ninja Weapons

$13.94 from Amazon »

I guess ninja weapons have always been made out of everyday household items, it's just that the definition of an everyday household item isn't quite the same in contemporary America as it was in feudal Japan. So when...

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First Alert 2-Story Escape Ladder

$34.97 from Amazon »

If you don't live in a high-rise building, and you're not Tom Cruise jonesing for stunt work at 53, you don't need to spend the money on a rescue parachute or <a href="/outdoors/tools/skysaver-rapelling-rescue-backpack.

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Skybar Wine Chill Drops

$11.37 from Amazon »

I'm not that into wine, but my girlfriend, She-Ra: Princess of Power, is. And since these Wine Chill Drops look kind of like tobacco pipes, I think I could use them to regale her with my Albert Einstein and Frosty the...

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The Slinky Machine

If you've been toying with the idea of making an escalator for your Slinky, then you are almost as quirky and random as Matthias Wandel. Almost because Wandel went ahead and did it. The Slinky Machine is based on the...

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Egg-Tastic Microwave Egg Cooker

$4.99 from Amazon »

I'm OK with microwaved eggs. Granted they sometimes come out with a hint of rubber band flavor, but it's a small price to pay for the convenience of being able to pop my english muffin-sized tupperware in on my way to...

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FreezerBoy - Game Boy Refrigerator Magnets

$19.99 from Amazon »

Here's a slightly more economical approach to "skinning" your fridge in LEGO bricks or a lady licking the shaft of a banana. It's simpler to install and, I think many would argue, just as inspiring too. FreezerBoy is...

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Surge Protector with 6 Outlets & 2 USB Ports

According to Aduro, their Surge Slim Protector's 540-joule energy rating will safely power a half dozen Japanese electric piston masturbators...or any other AC home or office environments. Two USB ports at...

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Thync Mood-Altering Headpiece

Sold Out from Amazon »

When asked to describe their startup, Thync, in 3 words founders Isy Goldwasser and Dr. Jamie Tyler go with "How good feels." That's a relief. Because when I look at the sliver of wearable tech stamped on that dude's...

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Adjustable Speed 19,000 RPM Milk Frother

Sold Out from Amazon »

Last weekend I was admiring a shiny new Ducati 1299 Panigale parked outside the ice cream store when my girlfriend started spouting off motorcycle-related wreck and fatality statistics and asked me why I would even want...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: Still The Man Mystery Box

Last February's Mystery Box giveaway catered to and crowned its winner The Man (congrats David M. of Thayer, IL). But we know there are plenty more The Mans out there, and we have plenty more male-centric loot in our...

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PoweriSite DeWalt Battery to USB Charger

$27.95 from Amazon »

Men! The time has come! To charge your phone! With your...

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4M Water Rocket Kit

$14.95 from Amazon »

I was as surprised as the people in this video (FF to 0:45) at how well the 4M Rocket lives up to its claims of blasting over 30 feet in the air. I didn't yelp like the lady filming but I did laugh at her and, as a result...

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Bolt M-1 Electric Motorcycle

$5k from Bolt »

When Bolt looks at its M-1 electric motorcycle, they think,"If you can ride a bicycle you can ride a Bolt." When I look at it I think, "Max speed 20 miles per hour? Vrrrroooommm! That's sidewalk legal."...

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Propane Tank Gauge

$19.88 from Amazon »

This hook-and-lift propane tank gauge claims it can make sure I never run out of gas at the grill again. What a crock. Unless it's some sort of on-call gas delivery drone or, like, a propane micro factory I'm pretty sure...

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Rabbit Chrome Chilling Stones

$14.80 from Amazon »

Hmmm. These aren't the Rabbits I've heard of. The Rabbits I've heard of do not insert into glasses, and in fact deal in the complete opposite of making things cold. I guess Rabbits are multi-faceted....

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Swincar E-Spider ATV

Part all-terrain, part arachnid, all electric. The Swincar is a French off-road vehicle with a new take on the idea of a fully independent suspension system. Each wheel is powered by its own motor and designed to flex...

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Flexi Freeze Ice Vest

$4.88 from Amazon »

My ex-girlfriend Karen doesn't need a Flexi Freeze cooling vest because the ice in her heart is strong enough to chill her entire chest cavity, but if you do a lot of manual labor, have to wear a heavy costume, or are...

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PowerUp 3.0 Smartphone-Controlled Paper Airplanes

$79.99 from »

Grab your friend Cornelius, and then grab this 2-pack of Power-Up 3.0 RC paper airplanes for 20% off from Dude Exclusives. If you're really skilled, you can even trash text during flight since the RCs for these diving...

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Wazoo Survival Gear Kindling Gift Card

Think you have mad survival skills? Here's your chance to put your money where your mouth is. And then light it on fire. Following their survivalist's credo to the letter, Wazoo has created the Kindling Gift Card. It's...

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The Red Herring Secret Safe

$349 from Amazon »

If the number of Air Vent Safes you have installed in your house is starting to look a little fishy, balance out the trickery and keep your valuables just as secure locked inside Console Vault's Red Herring Wall Safe....

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Flint and Tinder 10-Year Hoodie

$69.99 from »

Due to the amount of time I spend leaning on my elbows and a nervous zipper habit, most of my hoodies last about 3 months. Half that if it's cold season and I have to use the sleeves to wipe my nose when I don't feel...

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GazeBox Retractable Garage

One guess as to which country the GazeBox hails from. A glorious transparent arc that accordions around your 6-figure sports car? Protects it in style, with pomp, and without hiding it from jealous eyes? Gotta be Italian....

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Maqoo Cooling Underwear

$45 from Maqoo »

They're not quite a pair of Manties, but Maqoo still believes their new linen blend of underwear will be the coolest your boys will ever cradle. At least from a degrees Fahrenheit point of view. Aesthetically...

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SkySaver Rapelling Rescue Backpack

$749 - $849 from Amazon »

Click. Hook. Exit. Forget JanSport and SwissGear, who here wants a SkySaver multi-story personal rescue backpack?...

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Ranger Pace Counter

$9.99 from Amazon »

Accurate. Works day or night. Functional without satellite, cell tower, or batteries. However, using the Ranger Pace Counter will require focus and baseline mathematical skills. So it's still not for everyone....

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Mirror Houses

$217 from Mirror Houses »

Mirror Houses might be the perfect vacation rental for you and the Wicked Queen...or, uh, your girlfriend.... Set amidst the rolling green hills and dramatic mountain backdrop of South Tyrol, this pair of architectural...

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Manties Men's Lace Boxers

$31.19 from »

Last month this a-hole at my office left a box of Edible Anus chocolates on my desk with a note that said, "I saw these and thought of your face." Now everyone at work calls me Buttmuncher. Like we're 12! So for next...

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RipFix Hand Tear Repair

$11.91 from Amazon »

Well here's one downside to physical activity: nasty, torn-up palms. Check this out. If you can do it without gagging. Large chunks of skin ripped violently from a dude's hands in the name of "working out?" I hope he...

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Welix Two-Wheel Electric Scooter

The Welix has no learning curve and requires no skills to use, which is good because you can bet that if I'm too lazy to walk myself down the street or hallway, I am definitely too lazy to learn how to use a complex piece...

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Slim Water Repellent Laptop Backpack

Sold Out from Amazon »

Backpacks usually remind me of school. Ugh. One thing I do not miss is school. Granted, work is a buzzkill too. The grind of the rat race, my incredibly taxing job of trolling the Internet for stuff to spend money on....

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: vapRwear Smokable Hoodies

Puff, puff, pass may not work so well with vapRwear's smokable hoodies, but enter this week's giveaway, and you will be able to pass, puff, puff with a friend if you're the lucky winner of any 2 hoodies from the vapRwear...

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Pocket Shot Ultrafast Slingshot

$25 from Amazon »

Faster than a speeding bullet! Well...not really. But faster than a speeding steel slug firing out of any other slingshot. The Pocket Shot is a next gen slingshot. At least in terms of its rate of fire and multi-projectile...

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Philips Digital AirFryer

$230.30 from Amazon »

Philips has its own oil-less air fryer similar to the Big Boss model I previously pointed out will make you less likely to get fat and have a heart attack. Actually, Philips has two AirFryers: a simple version with manual...

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iBed Tablet Stand

$59.99 from Amazon »

iBed, a hands-free up-high and down-low tablet stand, notes that "When lying down for a long period of time, you not only risk dropping your tablet device, but you also suffer from pain in your arms and neck and back."...

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Military Issue Water Canteen

$19.25 from Amazon »

Two quarts, Army issue, OD Green. Not a whole lot else to say about this water canteen. Except that two quarts of water isn't really enough for a long, strenuous hike or desert offensive. Two quarts of whiskey might be...

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Imperial Spherificator - Turn Any Food Into Caviar

$129.99 from Amazon »

The Imperial Spherificator. Sounds like something you'd find alongside Mega Maid in Lord Dark Helmet's cache of planet-destroying weapons. But in fact, this superbly named device isn't meant for destruction or Mel Brooks...