A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Tuesday, January 21, 2014
$19.95 - $24.95 from Amazon »

Wine Folly has produced a series of infographic prints to assist in the casual wine drinker's oeno-education, and to give the wine savvy a sense of pride in seeing all the minutiae living inside their heads poured onto posters...

Thursday, December 26, 2013
$11.99 from Amazon »

I don't think there is a fast food item on the planet more polarizing than the White Castle slider. You either love them and eat 2 dozen on a dare the night before your wedding and then spend the entire reception puking even...

Sunday, January 15, 2012
$75.09 from Amazon »

For hosts, no more contracting pink eye or ocular herpes from smooshing your cornea against the peephole. For guests, no more wondering how much worse your wide hips or severe jaw line look magnified and distorted on the other side of the front door. This electronic peephole projects a clear, large image of the person outside on its LCD panel--similar to the display on a digital camera. Press the...

Friday, February 3, 2012
$7.16 from Amazon »

Red Solo cup, I fill you up. And am way less likely to drop you in someone's lap now that you are made of foam instead of cheap plastic that accrues grip-compromising condensation like Lindsay Lohan accrues pardons for criminal...

Saturday, February 23, 2013
$19.32 from Amazon »

I know this horse head mask is meant to be grossly unsettling to the viewer, but when I look at it all I can think of is Kramer Tourette's-ing out "Gggiiiddy up" and I feel more amused than disturbed. I imagine the expression...

Friday, September 2, 2011
$10.33 from Amazon »

Finally a real need has been filled. Underpants for your hands. Great for protecting your hands while... eating chocolate and scratching your butt? Maybe these gloves should be worn under your regular gloves to protect them from your usually grimy, sweaty hands....

Monday, December 16, 2013
$22.67 from Amazon »

One Amazon reviewer gives Encyclopedia Prehistorica: Sharks and Other Sea Monsters 5 stars, raving, "My 3-year-old loves it!" Well guess what, toddler mama, I'm 33 and I love it too! From Robert Sabuda and Matthew Reinhart...

Tuesday, July 30, 2013
$15k from Scott Morrison »

Since wood craftsman Scott Morrison both takes pride in the quality of his work and operates as a one-man show, his design award-winning Rocker Cradle will be cost prohibitive for the vast majority of its admirers. However...

Tuesday, April 3, 2012
$849 from Etsy »

Two steps forward, meet five steps back. For those of us who missed out on all the fun and carpal tunnel syndrome the typewriter generation had, or for those simply looking for an apparatus on which their grandmas can type...

Tuesday, July 16, 2013
$10.34 from Amazon »

A collection of pugs who got caught being the a-holes they are. Like Gonzo, 9-1/2" tall, 16 pounds, charged and booked for shoplifting. I assumed he stole his owner's ability to select an appealing dog breed, but evidently...

Tuesday, May 8, 2012
$24.99 from ToyVault »

When it's cold on the slopes, the only thing better than wearing a toasty warm ski mask is wearing a toasty warm ski mask whose Lovecraftian green tentacles scare the ever loving shit out of fellow downhillers. The Cthulhu...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
Discontinued

Though probably the type of installation that has to be seen in person for true appreciation, the photos are still pretty darn phenomenal. I feel like you could stare at this marvel of intricacy for an hour every day and find...

Monday, May 28, 2012
$10.46 from Amazon »

After all the recent hype over breastfeeding, I think it's about time we returned to a matter of real public interest: poo. Specifically, dropping a deuce at the office. How to Poo at Work is the #1 guide for handling the...

Wednesday, March 20, 2013
$129.95 - $199.95 from Hammacher Schlemmer »

It's a Back of the Door Cabinet. Seven words, and my work is done....

Wednesday, September 7, 2011
$39 from ThinkGeek »

Imagine this: You're on a date. As usual, things aren't going very well. She's finished her 3rd drink and still sees a slack jawed lummox when she looks across the table. The tab arrives. You, being the sucker that you are...

Thursday, March 21, 2013
By: LumiLor

Last time you attended a rave or pimped your ride with EL wire, I bet you thought, "This electroluminescent technology is sick...but I wish I had it in sprayable form." Well, meet LumiLor, the answer to your prayers. LumiLor...

Thursday, June 20, 2013
$24.95 from Amazon »

While I don't condone sleeping on a tie at work, I must say I have generally found my productivity (and genius!) levels to be highest after a few swigs of Grey Goose. So drinking out of a tie at work = acceptable. In moderation...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013
$39.99 - $99.99 from Amazon »

The beauty of Limeade Blast stems from the suckage of smartphones and tablets. Both that they suck up battery power like a 12-pound newborn on a teat, and that this inadequacy of smartphone and tablet batteries really sucks....

Thursday, August 11, 2011
$17.99 from Lootiful.com »

This is pretty badass and very well made. The iPWN! Case for iPhone 4 fits AT&T models perfectly and you'll surely be the only person you know that has one... unless you know a bunch of other geeks....

Friday, November 23, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Now that we've got Thanksgiving out of the way, it's time to deck the halls, fire up the "Jingle Bells" sing-a-longs, celebrate Jesus, and eat cheese. Cheesus Christ, a cheese grater that--like many folks' Sunday rituals and...

Wednesday, October 31, 2012
$15.99 from Amazon »

Communication, so the saying goes, is key. How appropriate then for the bilinguists of the Galactic Republic to provide us with this Translator Ring, a finger-sized key to communicating with the Huttese. Imagine how Jabba...

Monday, December 3, 2012
$70 - $100 from Combat Humidor »

Combat Cigar Humidors take Made in America to the next level. The waterproof stogie canisters are also custom crafted to order by disabled Marine Corps veterans out of Spanish cedar encased in an M13 7.62 x 51 linked ammo...

Thursday, August 22, 2013
$14,995 from Amazon »

I know what you're thinking. If I'm going to buy an original Ghostbusters 2 jumpsuit instead of paying my mortgage this year, it better at least be the one worn by Peter Venkman. Yeah, touche. On the one hand, Dr. Egon Spangler's...

Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Athletic apparel brand Nathan's Dome Light beanie has a strip of LEDs on both its front and back sides so that other people can watch where I'm going and get out of my way. Because when dusk falls I'm usually otherwise occupied...

Monday, March 5, 2012
$400 from Custom Made »

Bust out some some bluesy jams, and tell Siri to call you "BB King" with these cigar box guitars, in tobacco brands Padron 9 and El Baton. The smoke boxes are detailed and expanded, with fretted butternut necks and rosewood...

Thursday, April 4, 2013
$45 from Etsy »

From chemistry class I remember something about diatomic elements and noble gases, but mostly I remember that my teacher wore a tie-dyed lab coat and I could always see this one girl's lacy bras when she would bend over the...

Sunday, August 19, 2012
$9.66 from Amazon »

Swearing in another language. It's the only thing we really cared to learn during the mandatory years of high school French. Actually, my earliest memories of foreign curse words came much earlier, in 2nd grade, when the term...

Tuesday, February 14, 2012
By: Youtube

Abraham Lincoln's political career, the Civil War, slavery in The South--conspiracy theorists have been saying it for over a century, and now Seth Grahame-Smith's thinly-veiled novel, plus Tim Burton's twisted interpretive...

Thursday, September 19, 2013
$149 - $179 from VacuVita »

VacuVita is a vacuum-powered food preservation system that sets itself apart by not requiring the purchase and use of special plastic bags that shrivel up around their contents and make all food look like animal intestines....

Tuesday, October 8, 2013
$79.95 from Amazon »

In a way the SinuPulse Nasal Irrigation System is just as gross as Nosefrida the Snotsucker nasal aspirator due to their similar purposes in life: extractors of snot. But in a way it's not because the Nosefrida is intended...

Monday, December 26, 2011
$8.99 from Vat 19 »

A sarcastic spin on the traditional fortune cookie, unfortunate cookies tell it like it is. Each pack includes 10 witty, fun and sometimes scathing or disgusting fortunes that are sure to surprise whoever cracks them open...

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Wagons, the color blue, toys loud enough to get me grounded, stereos gangsta enough to make me feel like I was a part of the rap community, all of the things I loved as a young boy come rushing back in a singular, superb composition:...

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

25 years of life in Springfield are honored with a potato. Plus some bulbous eyes, a scruffy muzzle, and Woo hoo! a pink-frosted donut with rainbow sprinkles. Mr. Potato Head Homer Simpson has been released as an homage to...

Tuesday, March 13, 2012
$9.99 from Amazon »

A 3" x 1" alarm that attaches to any door or window, and fires a powerful siren if anyone enters. It's the perfect companion for travelers, people with nosy mothers and girlfriends, and the inexplicably paranoid. In addition...

Monday, October 10, 2011
$59 million from Christie's Real Estate »

Florida's Latin population tallies over 18%, and people who know stuff about populations speculate that by 2035, the state will have a Hispanic majority....

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Nothing gives me more satisfaction than finding new and exciting ways of flipping people off. First, an umbrella, and now, a housekey. The Middle Finger key--or as vendor Goodworth & Co. calls it, the "Best Wishes" key--is...

Monday, January 2, 2012
$126.60 from Amazon »

Take new school back to the old school with this ghetto blaster fit for an iPhone. This is a true MP3 Ghetto Blaster that uses removable solid-state data storage. So, all you have to do is slam a thumb drive or SD card in...

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Chrono-Shredder is a clock, a calendar, a reminder that those who sit at home and simply watch time go by have lives filled with nothing but growing piles of shit on the floor. Poetic, no? Susanna Hertrich combines machine...

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

These are so intricately made and real looking that I would not keep them in your bedroom at night. Why? Have you ever seen Starship Troopers? These things are great candidates to come alive at night and launch a full scale...

Tuesday, October 22, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I feel like the Aero Sphere fan, a sculptural household appliance imported from Japan, holds the power to blow more than cool air. Like all we have to do is play with it long enough--or figure out how to unlock a level--and...

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

I bet you didn't know Eva Unit 01 was also highly adept at manipulating the three states of matter. Well, two of the three anyway. Here to keep your home or office moist and safe from itchy skin and dry eyeballs is the Neon...

Sunday, May 5, 2013
$18.90 from Etsy »

Yesterday was May 4th and son of a bitch if I didn't bone the opportunity to run these Star Wars prints and say, "May the 4th be with you." And today is May 5th, another special day, particularly for the peoples of Mexico...

Wednesday, August 21, 2013
$229.99 from Amazon »

Is there any sight more precious and heartwarming than a loved one sleeping peacefully within the jaws of a shark? Oh come on, in a way he's protecting them. I hear that even kidnappers, bogeymen, and dogs who like humping...

Wednesday, September 12, 2012
$25 from Brad McGinty »

Who isn't a fan of checking out innards these days? Particularly when the innards belong to our favorite film creatures--Mogwais, Gremlins, Martians, Predators, Xenomorphs--and particularly when the versions we used to cut...

Tuesday, August 9, 2011
$74 from Etsy »

Finally. A way to combine your one true love and the girl you're currently boning. This handmade, handcrafted dress will surely lead to a handjob if you're smart enough to buy one for your girl....

Monday, October 7, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Boldly go into a dark room, and illuminate it as no man has done before. Well, no man save for the other men out there with taste and Trekkie fanaticism strong enough to persuade them to buy a Starship Enterprise ceiling light...

Sunday, April 22, 2012
$4k from Choc Edge »

Choc Creator is a revolutionary Voltron of Americans' two favorite things to do: screw around on the computer and eat. The first commercial 3D chocolate printer, Choc Creator Version 1, employs 10 mL syringes filled with liquid...

Sunday, November 4, 2012
$8.99 from Amazon »

Ice straws are what I will give children to drink hot chocolate with so I don't have to hear them whine and cry about how it's too hot and they burnt their tongue and waaa, waaa, waaa, I want a hug. I often want a hug too...

Friday, August 19, 2011
Discontinued

I need one of these for sure. Not just for display either.... For killin'! Some creepy dude named The Somber Raven made these Vampire Killing Kits and they're pretty legit. You can tell they're what's bolstering him from downtrodden...

Friday, November 8, 2013
$174.53 from Snow Inn »

Sort of a butt ski, sort of a sled, sort of a snow kart. The Yooner is sort of a lot of things by physical definition, but by use, maker TSL Outdoor would say it is only a thrilling, effortless, and, most importantly, learning...

Friday, October 26, 2012
$29.99 from Amazon »

If we can teach rats to run mazes and cows to jump over moons, why not teach fish to kick a soccer ball or swim through hoops? The R2 Fish School Fish Training Kit, developed by master trainer of the gilled ones Dr. Dean Pomerleau...

Thursday, November 21, 2013
$17.82 from Amazon »

If we were to step into reality for a brief moment, I guess we would concur that the opportunity to apply combat marksmanship and self-defense training to an encounter with an actual zombie is probably never going to arise....

Saturday, October 27, 2012
$4,945 - $5,695 from Pen Boutique »

Even as a Batman die-hard, I'm pretty sure that if I had $5,000 to spend on Dark Knight products, I wouldn't go for a fountain pen. But different folks, different strokes, 'ey? And if you fancy yourself, say, a DC Comics poet...

Saturday, February 22, 2014
$8.99 from Amazon »

It would be better if it were in the shape of the toast I'm going to pile it on, and I also doubt my ability to flip an egg within such tight confines without losing part of it to my burner, but I still appreciate the sentiment...

Tuesday, June 4, 2013
$8.50 from Amazon »

Even though my distaste for cats is such that I kind of wish someone would lock all of them in a bell tower scheduled to be lit on fire, I've read a few of the entries from this I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats...

Wednesday, March 6, 2013
$27.15 - $31.57 from Amazon »

They're terming Brook & Hunter's axe of a thousand ways to destroy and maim a "garden tool". Yeah, for all the "weeding" I have to do when gangs of Girl Scouts jump me in the grocery store parking lot because I dissed Do-si-dos....

Tuesday, January 14, 2014
$99 from Netatmo »

Business coach, life coach, fitness coach, diet coach, and now add sun coach to the list of people I pay to help me avert F'ing up. Except June isn't a person. She (I'll go ahead and personify her though) is a bracelet and...

Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Discontinued

Lionel Richie is one of those weird celebrities like Demi Moore and Kate Winselt who kind of starts looking better as he gets older. See: Lionel Richie circa 1983. And: Lionel Richie now. His songs, of course, have always...

Tuesday, April 17, 2012
$48.98 from Amazon »

Another Saturday night and I ain't got nobody...but I do got a sick 16 1/2" solid cast metal Alien Spiked Tri-Blade Hand Claw coated in an antique brass and gun-metal finish, which I will shadow box with in front of the mirror...

Thursday, February 7, 2013
$14 from Amazon »

My first question when Tim Joyce wrote to me about his Dry Goods athletic powder was, "Uh, what's that?" To which he responded, "It's essentially sprayable Gold Bond without the mess." Cool. But of course my second question...

Monday, June 11, 2012
$9.50 from Man Can »

Man Cans. Scented candles for men. No. For Men. Endorsed by Thor, Indiana Jones, and the Dos Equis guy. This one smells like a spent shotgun shell. At $9.50, it also smells like I'm done looking for a Father's Day gift, and...

Tuesday, February 7, 2012
$9.99 from ThinkGeek »

Get ready for the uncontrollable "O" mouth, exhalations of fire, and streaming tears of blissful discomfort only a few Victoria's Secret models, and Bhut Jolokia, the world's hottest pepper, can extract from your otherwise...

Monday, October 1, 2012
$29.99 from Etsy »

Had I an oven in which to grow a bun, definitely a Skeleton Baby T-Shirt would be my preferred method of announcing it to the world. I wonder if wearing it would deter the nosy old hens who feel up preggo women's bellies...

Monday, September 23, 2013

Battery-operated nail trimmer, um, no thank you, sir. Actually, my heart is pounding so fast and the knot snowballing in my stomach growing so large right now, I can't even muster the pleasantries. I'm just going to go with...

Thursday, September 27, 2012
$48 from Etsy »

I know your toddler is a unique and special snowflake, but now you can turn him into a programmable, monotone android too and revel in the irony! Carolyn Caffelle calls her R2D2 onesie and hat a costume, though I think everyone...

Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Father's Day is June 16th. I don't know about you, but I sure can't think of a better gift for a new dad than an apparatus that will allow him to suck the snot out of his kid's nose with his own mouth. And who says you have...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
$425 from Kate Bauman »

When you can't remember if Mama said you can't hurry love, or if Mama said knock you out, it's best to cover all bases. These gleaming symbols of betrothal let everyone you encounter know you are blissfully off the market...

Saturday, June 22, 2013
$65 from The UT Lab »

Shoes made out of paper?! What's next, condoms made out of lambskin?! Oh wait.... Unbelievable Testing Laboratory has spent many a month devising and refining their Light Wing Tyvek shoes, a pair of sneakers that weigh in...