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Star Trek USS Enterprise Sushi Set

$34.99 from ThinkGeek »

If you thought eating sushi off a wooden boat was good times, just wait until you soy-and-wasabi up your spicy tuna roll in the heart of the USS Enterprise. The most boldly gone of all sushi sets, this nod to Star Trek...

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1907 Harley-Davidson Strap Tank Motorcycle

$800k - $1 million from Mecum Auctions »

Harley and the Davidsons finished their first, single-cylinder, 116cc motorcycle prototype in 1903. It wasn't a lemon per se, but it lacked a motorcycle's defining characteristic: power. Their second bike, developed just...

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BusyBody Desktop Animation Toy

$24.95 from Eye Think Inc. »

When Rufus Seder emailed me a video of his BusyBody desktop animation toy I was so busy (i.e., lazy) I almost didn't watch it. What are these, a bunch of little Gumbies on a mirrored merry-go-round? I've got too many...

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Raiders of the Lost Ark Melting Toht Candle

$29.49 from Firebox.com »

Nothing like a hot day in the south or the Ark of the Covenant to make you feel like your face is gonna melt off. Though after my wee and innocent 6-year-old eyes were scarred for life watching Major Arnold Ernst Toht...

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Kisha Smart Umbrella

$49 from Kisha »

Nothing makes me more irate than getting stuck in a downpour than getting stuck in a downpour with a flimsy, POS umbrella. The Kisha is a solid piece of rain-shielding construction made from 100% windproof and corrosion-proof...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: The Space Jacket

When I was a young boy I told my mama when I grew up I wanted to be a spaceman. And instead of saying, "Aww honey, that's wonderful. You can be anything you set your mind to," and then giving me a trophy for eating one...

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Flashback Photobomber Hoodie

$205.20 from Beta Brand »

If you ride the flip side of taking hourly (quarter hourly? every 5-minute-ly?) selfies to Tweet and post on Instagram, and tend instead to wear you hood up and cap low, shielding your face when them camera comes out...

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Halfpops - Half-popped Popcorn

Sold Out from Amazon »

Halfpops are the Hans & Franz of popcorn. Where sissy girly men might eat airy, puffy, pouf clouds for snacks, real Alphas eat Halfpops. Halfpops take your regular popcorn kernels and [clap] pump them up. Less popping...

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Dragon Evolution Sword

$36.93 from Amazon »

I think it's fair to say that any sword that calls itself The Dragon Evolution Sword, but advertises that it features a double dragon pommel..."with letter opener" is not the type of sword that could actually slay a dragon....

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Torch Plant Light Botanical Candle

How precious. A floating puff of plant with an LED light at its end. Though overpriced by a factor of 8, the Torch Plant Light Botanical Candle is a clever centerpiece designed by Japan's Pianta x Stanza to look like...

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6 Million Digits of Pi Poster

$20.95 from ExaText Posters »

It's Pi Day! Happy 3.14.15. You'll be able to celebrate this momentous occasion only once in your lifetime, so I hope you have something good cooked up for tonight. I myself will be living it up with many different types...

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BACtrack Mobile Breathalyzer

$84.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Get BACtrack Mobile, a smartphone-attached breathalyzer and app, as it blows through Dude Exclusives at 57% off retail value....

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Shower Surfer Neoprene Bath Caddy

$29.99 from ShowerSurfer.com »

Know what your shampoo needs? A wetsuit. The Shower Surfer is a neoprene shower and bath caddy that secures implements of hygiene without: 1) falling off your shower head pipe and smashing your foot; 2) rusting; and 3)...

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Wingman Shot Glass

$8.95 from Amazon »

Just in time for St. Paddy's Day: super hot girls getting super drunk on shots! And also a swell and enabling 2-person shot glass to prod them along. Ahhh, ain't nothing like a holiday, alcohol, and teamwork to send a...

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Oracle Color-Changing Lightsaber with Sound

Sold Out from Amazon »

Vader one day, Yoda the next. Go from the Dark Side to the Light, or go the other way for some cookies, with Saberz's Oracle, a lightsaber fitted with the company's Prizm tech to produce a rainbow of colors and 3 different...

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NES Cartridge Cutting Board

$40 - $50 from Etsy »

Dave Stencil of Cutting Boredom has a place for you to slice and dice your mushrooms. You know, in case you prefer to eat them bite by bite instead of chest bumping or head butting them to get bigger. His NES cartridge...

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Digital Tape Measure

$42 from Amazon »

One thing I am not so great at is measuring things to within 1/16". How tedious it is counting all those little hash marks. I think we should just round to the nearest foot. That's what I did in the online dating profile...

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Pizza Box Oven

$44.99 from Amazon »

It's not delivery. And it's not DiGiorno*. It's homemade pizza from the Cuizen Pizza Box Oven. And it's so adorable I can hardly look at it without squealing. And by squealing I mean feeling an overwhelming urge to smoke...

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Pheromone-Enhanced Tactical Soap

Tyler Durden doesn't need any help from pheromones to get laid, but, uh, I could maybe use some if they work. And Tactical Soap maker Grondyke Soap Company assures me the evidence suggests that they do. Tactical Soap...

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Water Misting Fan with Carabiner Clip

$6.99 from Amazon »

I filed this water misting fan under Style --> Accessories because even though the O2 Cool companion was primarily made to provide some quick and instant relief on a hot day, making it more of an Outdoors --> Tools...

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PancakeBot Pancake Printer

Sold Out from Amazon »

Turn a Picasso...or your own boobie scribbles...into edible, delectable art with the PancakeBot, the world's first pancake printer, and the world's latest entirely unnecessary invention! Mama! I'm tired of circles and...

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BatteryBox Portable MacBook Charger

$134.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

What's in your box? Your stash? A campfire? A Gaga? Aw, just a battery? Well, does it at least contain enough power to give an additional 6 hours of life to my MacBook Pro? Alright then, I guess I'm still mildly interested....

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Bullet Bouquets

$29.95 - $214.95 from Bullet Bouquets »

Bullet Bouquets. No better way to call them than that. And just as cool as these loaded pots of blooms: gung-ho shooter and artist Anthony Zambai saw the idea for them on Reddit less than a week ago. When the Bullet Bouquet...

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Got Snipped Vasectomy Gift Baskets

$34.99 - $75.99 from Got Snipped »

It's that mad, mad, mad, mad time of year. With March comes Selection Sunday. With Selection Sunday comes the NCAA Tournament. And with the NCAA Tournament comes...vasectomies. Lots and lots of vasectomies. More vasectomies...

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Lunar Legacy Combat Sword

$26.99 from Amazon »

I love the Amazon Q&A sections. Because, like another potentially interested party, I too was wondering if the Lunar Legacy would be a good sword for battle or just display. Three current owners responded, with two of...

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Nerdwax Glasses Grip

$12.99 from Amazon »

Glasses-wearing nerds rejoice! Glasses-wearing non-nerds and sunglasses-wearing anyone can do a little jig too if you ever have trouble keeping your specs and shades positioned securely on your face without constantly...

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The Sting Fixed Blade Knife

$38.98 from Amazon »

A boot or belt blade through and through, Columbia River Knife & Tool says its Sting is a knife meant for walking. The 3.1" black spear point features 2 edges whittled from a single solid piece of hot forged carbon steel...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: Haze Vaporizer

Things I do discreetly: 1) Spit out gristly pieces of chicken after I bite into them; 2) Ball her; 3) Toke up in public. Strawberry and chocolate smoking oils only, of course. Now you can partake in the herbal refreshment...

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Selfie Vibrator with HD Camera (NSFW)

$187.64 from Amazon »

It doesn't have to be a holiday or special occasion to surprise your lady with a thoughtful gift. The Svakom Gaga Sex Selfie Stick even has a foolproof, built-in mechanism for gauging how much she likes it. Come on, sugar...

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Cinder Sensing Cooker

$499 from Cinder »

Cinder looks a little like a Foreman, acts a little like a sous vide machine, and makes the food it turns out taste a little like the best steak/salmon/caramelized onions you've ever had. At least according to the Sensing...

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Onion Holder & Odor Remover

$11.43 from Amazon »

Some things that suck about raw onions besides the way they linger on my palate and infiltrate every burp I belch for the next 36 hours include: 1) Make me cry like a 9-year-old girl at her guinea pig's funeral when I...

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vapRwear Smokable Hoodies

$99 from VapRwear »

Elvis "Papi" Edwards created the line of vapRwear smokable hoodies. Papi Edwards. Caribbean native. Colorado resident. Incredibly enterprising stoner. His vapRwear hoodies all have hookah-like drawstrings at their necks...

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HyperIce Vyper Vibrating Foam Roller

$183.64 from Amazon »

Hey look, it's a new BDSM toy for pain seekers muscle recovery tool for athletes. You've might have seen foam rollers here before, and you might have seen HyperIce brainchildren here before, but this hybrid of hurts so...

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Dandelight

$140 from Moma Store »

Have you heard of tulip mania, a period during the Dutch Golden Age when people were playing tulip bulbs like the pre-2008 real estate market, paying exorbitant amounts of money for what was essentially a big fat seed?...

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Puff-N-Fluff Dog Dryer

$39.99 - $44.99 from Amazon »

Nine-year-old Marissa Streng came up with the Puff-N-Fluff bag. To dry her pug, Mojo, after a bath, after a swim, after coming in from the rain, after any time she preferred not gagging and retching to inhaling the ripe...

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Ninja Garden Gnome

$30.49 from Firebox.com »

Gardenzilla taking out all of your lawn ornaments? Sounds like a job for [cue music] Ninja Gnome! The squirrels and my neighbor's cat Willard better watch out too. This assassin may be tiny...and made of, like, resin...but...

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X-Mode Energy Shots on Tap

$29.99 from Amazon »

Uh oh. As if kegs of beer and boxes of wine aren't dangerous enough in my hands. I don't want children, but I have a feeling if I spent an hour in a room with X-Mode and its 100 ounces of energy shots on tap I'd walk...

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Solar Window Charger

Sold Out from Amazon »

This solar powered window charger reminds me of the Winbot window-washing robot, except that it doesn't move around your windows and clean them, it just sits there soaking up the sun and converting its mighty power to...

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Walther PPK Rubber Band Gun

$24.99 from Etsy »

The name's Band. James Band....

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Haunt Furniture Luxe Bed

$2,400 - $3k from Haunt Furniture »

They call me Dracoola for my mystical aura, my brooding allure, and my fine taste in modern gothic furniture. Would you like a tour of my faux leather Luxe king bed in matte black finish, ma'am?...

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Celtic Elite Bowie Knife

Sold Out from Amazon »

Festive or hideous? This Celtic Elite Bowie Knife from Ridge Runner is maybe a little bit of both. But come on, what better to pair with your kilt and Guinness this St. Paddy's Day than a thick stainless steel blade with...

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International All-in-One Travel Plug Adapter

$12.95 from Amazon »

Granted, I haven't been out of the country in a while on account of...some stuff...but the last time I had to schlep along device adapters I think they were about the size of my head and weighed approximately 27 pounds....

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YERKA Unstealable Bike

$399 from indiegogo »

You may have seen the YERKA and its integrated, supposedly theft-proof locking system floating around the Internet before, but today the Chilean bicycle designers have officially launched their crowdfunding campaign in...

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Igloo Dome Sensory Deprivation Pillow

Discontinued

Shield yourself from all light and sound while you sleep without strapping things over your eyes, jamming them in your ears, or looking like an ostrich. The Igloo Dome Pillow is a cushioned sleeping tent for the head...

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Zelda Engagement Chest & Rupee Ring Box

Sold Out from Etsy »

Will you be mine in holy nerd matrimony? In sickness (in which case I will give you some Red, Blue, or Green Potion) and in health (in which case I will guard your health bar with my Master Sword), in good Hyrulian times...

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The Beer Peen Hammer

Now you can use your peen to open your beer. I mean, if you couldn't already. Good Beer Hunting has smithed its Beer Peen Hammer in the likeness of an antique ball peen hammer they picked up at an estate sale. Each of...

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Bayit Smart Wi-Fi Socket

The Bayit Socket takes your fans, your heaters, you lamps, TVs, coffee machines, even washers and dryers and converts them from simple handy appliances to an army of minions at your beck and call. Bayit is a smart socket...

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Olight Mini Intimidator Flashlight

Sold Out from Amazon »

From 200 to 600, from 600 to 1200, and from 1200 to 2800 lumens over the 4 modes of Olight's SR Mini Intimidator compact flashlight. At just 5" long and 10 ounces in (empty) weight, this variable output shiner blares...

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Seaboard Squishy Silicone Keyboard

$3,500 from Roli »

I thought maybe because there aren't really any distinct keys on the Seaboard I wouldn't really need any distinct talent to play it, but in watching the video of...is that Kenny G?...jamming out on his, I'm reconsidering...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: Vintage Copper Fire Pit Set

We're at that midpoint between frikkin' sick of winter and summer's more than a stone's throw away. But click here and enter to win this vintage copper fire pit, plus a set of cooking tools, and you'll be able to stay...

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Vibration Plate Jiggle Fitness Machine

$249.99 from Amazon »

If you've ever watched TV at 3 in the morning you've probably seen the Power Plus Vibration Plate, or something like it, before. I've seen the machine making people's jiggly parts jiggle many times myself. But what I...

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Couples' Infrared Sauna

$1,049.99 from Amazon »

I guess it's not technically a sauna for couples, but it is a sauna for 2 people and there's no way in hell I'm sharing such a small, sweaty (but slightly less sweaty than a regular sauna since infrared saunas are absorbed...

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Bushnell BackTrack Personal GPS Tracker

Sold Out from Amazon »

Not that I ever get lost, but...oh, put a sock in it, Mama, I wouldn't get lost even if I ever went somewhere either!...were I a directionally and locationally challenged person, I might like to have Bushnell's little...

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Mr. Spock & Captain Kirk Salt & Pepper Shakers

$18.95 from Amazon »

After 83 years with us the pure legend who was Mr. Spock is gone. I'm sure we all share the hope that, wherever he and his alter ego, Leonard Nimoy, have gone, they live long and prosper....

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Battery Organizer with Removable Tester

$19.99 from Amazon »

TV remotes, console controllers, and flashlights, oh...crap. I thought I had 4 more AA batteries somewhere in here. Amidst the cords and paper clips and eyeglass repair kits and, oh hey, here's my Mr. Spock action figure...

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Healthful Home 5-Minute Mold Test Kit

$39.99 from Amazon »

Everyone talks about mold causing allergies and lung problems and, like, mental illness, but I just think it's gross. If I want fungus growing alongside my bed or watching TV with me, I'll get a Mushroom Log and at least...

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MakersKit Cocktail Bar Set

$29.99 from MakersKit »

Shake it, stir it, strain it, pour it. And bring on Pussy Galore to taste it. Here MakersKit, known for their DIY sets of everything from terrariums to gourmet marshmallows, has a Classic Cocktail bundle for your home...

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The Quarter Century 25-Year-Guarantee Pants

$85 from Kickstarter »

Quarter Century pants are just like every other pair of pants you own, except you'll still be wearing Quarter Centuries long after every other pair of pants you own has been relegated to: weekends only; the back of the...

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The Butter Mill

$18.78 from Amazon »

Stop the bread massacre! Instead of putting holes in your toast and sandwiches, save your sourdough's texture and integrity by putting the holes in your butter dispenser instead. With its top surface covered in tiny...

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What's On Your Mind Pillows

$44.62 - $170.52 from Etsy »

Eat more bacon. Have more sex. How did Lynn from Sew English get ahold of my to-do list? More importantly, why'd she have to go applique it on some pillows? I mean, my mama's gonna see those every day when she makes my...

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Magnetic - Statically Charged Sticky Notes

$7 - $67 from Tesla Amazing »

OK, Magnetic, you win. The coolest new product I've seen all year. Created by appropriately titled Tesla Amazing, Magnetic is a line of notes, pads, boards, and sheets that act like sticky notes without the gummy, lint-collecting...

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Dragon Chess Set

$154.06 from Amazon »

Welp, judging by the bones fossilized in the platform uplifting this chess set's glass board, the biggest dragons have already been slain. Now all I gotta conquer are the baby fire breathers, and in all likelihood their...

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Elasto-Lok Tactical Gear Clip

$4.75 from Amazon »

Compatible with MOLLE bags (and probably, like, Jansport backpacks too), the Elasto-Lok from Duraflex is a multipurpose fastener that will secure anything from flashlights during camping trips to machetes during military...

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X15 Flamethrower

$1,599 from Throwflame.com »

People typically use flamethrowers to clear brush. And just like that, for the first time in my life I cannot think of anything I'd rather do today than go clear me some brush. Better than a firehose and almost as badass...

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Fight Club 2 Comic Series

It's all part of The Game. Wait, no, that's not it. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was... Nope, not that one either (but check out the latest homage to Keyser Soze here). The first rule of Fight Club is...yeah...

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PowerPot Camping Cooker & Charger

Back to the Future II didn't manage to predict this bizarre technological feat of the 2010s: cooking and charging your phone with the same device. (Not to mention chilling, blending, and charging your phone with the same...

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Animal Paper Clips

$7.09 - $16.04 from Amazon »

Midori makes over two dozen different animals ready to hold the wayward strands of your life together. At least the parts of it that are on paper. The company's animal D-Clips are the most precious paper clips I've ever...

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Pavlok - Habit-Breaking Shocking Wristband

$176.64 from Amazon »

If it's good enough for training the dog, it's good enough for training you. Pavlok thinks so anyway. And most people who were spanked as kids or repeatedly got hit in the face playing dodgeball would probably agree that...

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KeyBiner Carabiner Multi-Tool

$35 - $70 from Fortius Arms »

The KeyBiner calls itself a more refined version of the carabiner, but you might recognize it as a more souped up version of the KeySmart. Both remove some of the bulk and all of the jangle of schlepping around a fat...

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BioSport Earbuds with Built-in Heart Monitor

$23.75 from Amazon »

SMS Audio has your back heart. Their BioSport earbuds don't just pump out the vocals, bass, and mid-tones to keep you moving, they also measure your heart rate and track your intensity to keep you moving...harder. Faster!...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: Tactile Turn Metal Pen Set

So what if I still scrawl like a 5-year-old, and am so unaccustomed to hand writing stuff anymore that my hand cramps after 3 minutes of holding a pen? I still love them. And steal them from every hotel, restaurant, and...

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The Chateau de Vigny

$5.7 million from Immo Best International »

You know, I've been thinking it's getting to be about time I move out of my mama's house....

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Flaviar Top-Shelf Liquor Tasting Packs

$39.99 from Flaviar »

Is this what Grandma meant when she asked for a nip of whiskey? And then asked again four more times? Flaviar is a private, members-only tasting club that provides its subscribers with regular tasting packs of small-batch...

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Military Grade Rubber Bands

$15.50 from Amazon »

Calling them rubber bands on steroids would be figuratively accurate (and obviously sounds cool), but what Ranger Bands really are are big ol' cut hunks of bicycle tubes*. Thick and strong like my...hands...these military...

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Archtek Toothpaste Tablets

$8.71 from Amazon »

Do you know how often I go to bed without brushing my teeth because I have fallen asleep on the couch, or stumbled home drunk, or am just flat out too lazy to go brush my teeth? Probably at least as often as I do gather...

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Supersized ilumi Smartbulb

$89 from ilumi »

For those out there seeking Magnum-sized mood lighting to go with your Magnum-sized...heart and desire to sweetly romance your lady friend with no expectations or monkey business whatsoever, ilumi has fed its A21 Smartbulb...

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OGIO Ascent Backpack

$99.99 from OGIO »

I think I could collect backpacks like some people collect Rolexes or Lambos. Because I love all of their zippers and pockets and organization of life compartments. And because I'm not some sort of flashy high roller....

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TARDIS Wedding Ring

$1,100 - $3k from Etsy »

Doctor Who's magical, time-traveling police box is pervasive enough in pop culture to have inspired not just one, but two thousand-dollar-plus unique and artisan-crafted diamond rings. Probably more, really, but this...

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Faze Bantam Drone

$39.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Oh boy, another drone to add to what is turning into quite the drone collection around here. This one, the Faze, is a tiny little guy weighing in at just 12.2 grams. But the doesn't mean he doesn't show up fully stocked...

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Periodic Tableware

$18 - $85 from PT Ware »

Periodic Tableware is one reason why people invent new words. Like "mud-licious" and "puddle-wonderful" and, most appropriate to this case, "geektastic." This collection of scientific glassware transformed into vessels...

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The Scrubba Wash Bag

$39.99 from Amazon »

When I see the word "Scrubba" all I can think of is my Uncle Orville. Gettin' all hot and ornery with my cousin Stoobie when we were kids and he refused to take a bath. "You grimy ground crawler," he'd yell, "if you don't...

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Glitch Playing Cards

Sold Out from Amazon »

Glitch: "An electrical pulse of short duration that is usually the result of a fault or design error, particularly in a digital circuit." That's a pretty good way to put it. Thank you, Wikipedia (yes, I donate regularly.)...

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Pointie Tactical Marker

$20 - $25 from indiegogo »

The Pointie. A "tactical marker" in name, but we both know what that's a euphemism for: stabbing things. Like glass during rescues. Warthogs during attacks. And whiteboards. Insolent, misbehavin' whiteboards....

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Equil Smartpen

Want to digitally immortalize your Best Ever Iron Man sketch? (Or, in my case, boobie doodles?) The Equil Smartpen 1 turns drawings done by hand into editable digital copies that can be stored and revisited ad infinitum...

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Soundhawk Smart Hearing Amplifier

Sold Out from Amazon »

It might look like just another Bluetooth earpiece, but the Soundhawk is definitely not just another Bluetooth earpiece. In fact, though it can serve as one, the Soundhawk isn't really a Bluetooth earpiece at all. But...

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Matador Pocket Blanket

$53 from Amazon »

Good news! We are now 75% through with winter! I mean, probably. I mostly just made that number up, but it sounds about right. Spring comes in March doesn't it? (At least for those of us who didn't anger God by cheating...

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Norrom Freshwater Aquarium

$450 - $490 from Norrom »

Designed in Sweden, made in the UK. That's the crux of what Norrom feels sets its forthcoming aquarium apart from all the other fish cribs out there. Using contemporary techniques and tasteful aesthetics, the company's...

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TravelCard Micro-USB Wallet-Size Charger

Wallets' job description just keeps on growing. What used to be no more than a suitcase for cash and photos of your kids has now been tasked with carrying everything from credit and fro yo frequent patron cards to custom-fitted...

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RAVPower FileHub - The Data Multi-Tool

Sold Out from Amazon »

The RAVPower FileHub is like the Hugh Jackman of data tools. Not only can it act, and look like a superhuman freak of nature whose muscles grow muscles, and talk in an Australian accent that makes every woman want to...

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An Illustrated Book of Bad Arguments

$10.38 from Amazon »

Know what they say? If you're arguing with an idiot, make sure he isn't doing the same thing. Know who heeds that advice? Almost no one engaging in an argument on the Internet. But author Ali Almossawi has decided to...

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Back to the Future DeLorean iPhone 6 Case

$50 from Bandai »

Like the Crazy Case Batmobile, Bandai's Back to the Future II DeLorean case for the iPhone 6 is forthcoming. And while it would be a grand and poetic gesture for the Japanese toy company to set their lit-up, pimped-out...

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Skull Hard Boiled Egg Mold

$8.99 from Amazon »

I think the best ad campaign of all time might be The Incredible Edible Egg. Not only because it rhymes, which is always the best way to present something, and is about food, which is always the best thing for something...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: The Man Mystery Box

"The Man," as in this Mystery Box is stuffed with over $500 worth of gear coveted by the XY sex, and also "The Man," as in that's what owning the stuff in this box will make you. Click here and enter to win Dude's The...

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Popcorn Monsoon

One thing that would make Jolene Carlier's Popcorn Monsoon better is if all the popped kernels actually landed in the bowl when they dropped out of the bottom of the machine's Mario pipe. But since the invention is still...

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Handmade Wood & Aluminum USB Charger

Sold Out from Amazon »

BREAKING NEWS: Boutique Design Meets Charging Powerhouse! Also, Thundersnow! in Boston! Dude, this weekend just keeps getting trippier. First all the dead flowers and rotting meat I got from my ex for Valentine's Day...

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Pancake Pen

$9.99 from Amazon »

I know I'm ur sunshine, Mama. You don't have to make me pancakes that spell it out for...no, wait! But I mean, since you're already almost finished with them anyway, you should probably just keep going. Mmmm, we have...