A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Tuesday, September 24, 2013
$16 from archer »

I'm not sure if a soap that smells of barrel-aged, charcoal-filtered whiskey will inspire me to do the dishes more often, but it will probably inspire me to to do that tie-dye lava milk experiment catalyzed by dish soap on...

Friday, August 23, 2013
$15 from indiegogo »

You know how some people pour vodka in their eye or, like, soak a tampon in it and then stick it up their butt to get drunk quick and calorie-free? Well now there's a similar--albeit safer and way less disgusting--way to introduce...

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Chrono-Shredder is a clock, a calendar, a reminder that those who sit at home and simply watch time go by have lives filled with nothing but growing piles of shit on the floor. Poetic, no? Susanna Hertrich combines machine with social commentary to produce a striking piece of art that has been exhibited in galleries across Europe, and, this year, will be released for sale in an edition of 20. (Price...

Monday, March 5, 2012
$400 from Custom Made »

Bust out some some bluesy jams, and tell Siri to call you "BB King" with these cigar box guitars, in tobacco brands Padron 9 and El Baton. The smoke boxes are detailed and expanded, with fretted butternut necks and rosewood...

Wednesday, September 12, 2012
$25 from Brad McGinty »

Who isn't a fan of checking out innards these days? Particularly when the innards belong to our favorite film creatures--Mogwais, Gremlins, Martians, Predators, Xenomorphs--and particularly when the versions we used to cut...

Wednesday, March 6, 2013
$27.15 - $31.57 from Amazon »

They're terming Brook & Hunter's axe of a thousand ways to destroy and maim a "garden tool". Yeah, for all the "weeding" I have to do when gangs of Girl Scouts jump me in the grocery store parking lot because I dissed Do-si-dos. 1) If little girls are made of sugar & spice, sugar & spice are the spawns of a hell demon. 2) Do-si-dos do taste like peanut butter dog vomit. My brother made me eat some...

Thursday, December 5, 2013
$179.95 from Amazon »

Whomever posted all their slide shots to the Celestron InfiniView Digital Microscope listing on Amazon sure liked looking at bugs. Check out that white one. What is that, a dust mite? That thing is sick, dude. But it does...

Sunday, April 22, 2012
$4k from Choc Edge »

Choc Creator is a revolutionary Voltron of Americans' two favorite things to do: screw around on the computer and eat. The first commercial 3D chocolate printer, Choc Creator Version 1, employs 10 mL syringes filled with liquid...

Tuesday, February 14, 2012
By: Youtube

Abraham Lincoln's political career, the Civil War, slavery in The South--conspiracy theorists have been saying it for over a century, and now Seth Grahame-Smith's thinly-veiled novel, plus Tim Burton's twisted interpretive...

Wednesday, July 3, 2013
$1,441.50 from Amazon »

One time my friend Esteban bought a boat and named it Anubis and that's about the only exposure I've ever had to the Egyptian jackal-headed god of the underworld. But I guess if I'm lucky when I die he and his six-pack will...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Monday, August 12, 2013
$29.99 from Amazon »

Ladies, I dare anyone to try to rip you off or cut up your credit cards or even look at you in a way you do not find pleasing when you're carrying one of these babies. From the butcher's block to the sewing machine, nothing...

Monday, January 2, 2012
$103.99 from Amazon »

Take new school back to the old school with this ghetto blaster fit for an iPhone. This is a true MP3 Ghetto Blaster that uses removable solid-state data storage. So, all you have to do is slam a thumb drive or SD card in...

Monday, December 26, 2011
$8.99 from Vat 19 »

A sarcastic spin on the traditional fortune cookie, unfortunate cookies tell it like it is. Each pack includes 10 witty, fun and sometimes scathing or disgusting fortunes that are sure to surprise whoever cracks them open...

Saturday, October 27, 2012
$4,945 - $5,695 from Pen Boutique »

Even as a Batman die-hard, I'm pretty sure that if I had $5,000 to spend on Dark Knight products, I wouldn't go for a fountain pen. But different folks, different strokes, 'ey? And if you fancy yourself, say, a DC Comics poet...

Friday, August 19, 2011
Discontinued

I need one of these for sure. Not just for display either.... For killin'! Some creepy dude named The Somber Raven made these Vampire Killing Kits and they're pretty legit. You can tell they're what's bolstering him from downtrodden...

Saturday, October 19, 2013
$149.99 from ThinkGeek »

All I want to know is does this neon Ghostbusters sign come with an optional N64 add-on? Because I hear a simple phone call doesn't cut it with the crew these days. If you've got somethin' strange in your neighborhood, the...

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

These are so intricately made and real looking that I would not keep them in your bedroom at night. Why? Have you ever seen Starship Troopers? These things are great candidates to come alive at night and launch a full scale...

Tuesday, August 9, 2011
$74 from Etsy »

Finally. A way to combine your one true love and the girl you're currently boning. This handmade, handcrafted dress will surely lead to a handjob if you're smart enough to buy one for your girl....

Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Discontinued

Sometimes in the great out of doors you get gunk or crud or straight up shit on your hands and would like to clean it off without dumping out half of your water supply in the process. Sometimes it is approximately 172 degrees...

Wednesday, April 24, 2013
$16.99 - $24.99 from Bubi Bottle »

Innumerable points to the Bubi collapsible bottle for calling itself a Bubi and including the option of affixing nipples to its top. Obviously. But in addition to these superficial treats, the Bubi bottle also boasts some...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
$425 from Kate Bauman »

When you can't remember if Mama said you can't hurry love, or if Mama said knock you out, it's best to cover all bases. These gleaming symbols of betrothal let everyone you encounter know you are blissfully off the market...

Saturday, December 29, 2012
By: Generate

First and foremost, designer Sotirios Papadopoulos' Full Moon Cabinet ships with an accompanying CD of music custom-compiled to reflect its aura. Never mind that the lunar credenza is also coated with Eco Light Inside, a material...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013
$599 from Tower Garden »

Soil. Lengthy growth periods. The X-axis. Tower Garden rejects you en masse. An aeroponic growing system ideal for rooftops, patios, balconies, and terraces, this food and flower producer replaces pots of temperamental soil...

Thursday, May 23, 2013
$10 from Amazon »

Penis pasta, penis pasta, penis pasta! Cornelius just made me say it 3 times fast. I found that it wasn't very difficult, but he found it very funny because everyone in the Apple store looked at me like I'm the type of person...

Tuesday, July 30, 2013
$19 - $30 from Society 6 »

Kids, this is what happens when you don't wear sunscreen: everyone figures out your secret identity. See Mike Draw has created a Superhero Tan Lines print to show how even the likes of Batman can be so clever when it comes...

Thursday, September 5, 2013
$39.99 from Vat 19 »

This is what happens to people who eat 5-pound gummy bears: they OD on sugar and high fructose corn syrup, their brains become gelatinous, and they turn into 5-pound gummy skulls. In flavors cherry, blue raspberry, and grape....

Monday, October 10, 2011
$59 million from Christie's Real Estate »

Florida's Latin population tallies over 18%, and people who know stuff about populations speculate that by 2035, the state will have a Hispanic majority....

Thursday, November 29, 2012
$164 from Amazon »

Shoot first, focus later. So goes the mantra to the Lytro Light Field Camera, the photography world's first "living pictures" point-and-shooter that allows users to tweak both the focus and the perspective of photos after...

Thursday, March 7, 2013
$199.99 from SamTimer »

Although most of my anecdotes and personal claims to greatness are complete BS, I swear, what follows is a true story. Two true stories, actually. First, I am a formidable Scrabble player. Second, one time I dated a girl who...

Thursday, January 3, 2013
$8.13 from Amazon »

The extent of Amazon's grenade knife description: "Looks like a grenade." Hmmm...sold! I'm such an easy target for advertisers. Don Draper could probably sell me a pile of gorilla shit. He could probably sell me a ticket to...

Monday, October 1, 2012
$29.99 from Etsy »

Had I an oven in which to grow a bun, definitely a Skeleton Baby T-Shirt would be my preferred method of announcing it to the world. I wonder if wearing it would deter the nosy old hens who feel up preggo women's bellies...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
Discontinued

Do you really want to irritate your wife? Then demand that this be your wedding ring. Why not? Kind of makes a statement to would be criminals too. You're a dude wearing a black steel ring... you're a dude not to be messed...

Tuesday, February 26, 2013
$8.36 from Amazon »

What if Darth Vader had been a good dad? Or even had just announced his paternity to Luke sometime before he got into that imminent death predicament? Darth Vader and Son not only speculates on this topic, but does so with...

Tuesday, May 7, 2013
$19.95 from Hoodie Pillow »

Shark Tank strikes again. The Hoodie Pillow, another concept first introduced on ABC's entrepreneurial cattle call, has debuted a travel version of its fleece snooze-time companion. In this case, the namesake hood connects...

Thursday, June 27, 2013
$24.95 from Amazon »

I see the Fireside Fishing Pole and I see you and me going fishing in the dark. Lying on our backs and counting the stars. Where the cooool grass gr-oh-oh-ows. Yeah I like country music, so the fried okra what? You know who...

Tuesday, February 7, 2012
$9.99 from ThinkGeek »

Get ready for the uncontrollable "O" mouth, exhalations of fire, and streaming tears of blissful discomfort only a few Victoria's Secret models, and Bhut Jolokia, the world's hottest pepper, can extract from your otherwise...

Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Well here's one way to appease vegetarians, gluten intolerants, lousy cooks, people with a dish washing aversion, and Orville Redenbacher this Thanksgiving. King of POP has condensed an entire Turkey Day feast into 9 tubs...

Saturday, January 12, 2013
$44 from Nylon Journal »

NYC Subway Map Tights address two male quandaries. 1) Being lost on the streets of New York and not wanting to ask for directions. 2) Coming up with something non-douchebaggy to say after getting caught staring at a smokin'...

Thursday, March 8, 2012
$10.07 from Amazon »

This nifty Peanut Butter & Jelly Wallet with photo-real fabric looks so authentic petty thieves and street urchins will never suspect it's housing your cash and credit cards. On the flip side, beware of fat kids. Each sandwich...

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Miso Soup Design, bad move releasing photos of the Anti-loneliness Ramen Bowl before you have actual Anti-loneliness Ramen Bowls to sell. Now everyone wants one, everyone is pestering you to buy one, and the bowls' target...

Thursday, September 12, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Heavy Doody cannot hide the fact that I washed down 3 bowls of Honey Badger BBQ chili with one of those German hefeweizens that tastes like bananas, or that I've been in the bathroom for 18 minutes, or the sounds I am making...

Thursday, June 27, 2013
$24.90 - $159.90 from Awesome Maps »

Although all maps technically contain the places you want to see before you die, Awesome Maps' Bucketlistmap provides the added service of specifics--the phenomena, landmarks, and activities within each country or region that...

Wednesday, October 23, 2013
$12,900 from Brevet »

Is it classy or trashy that Rolex has taken time to the casino? I mean, sure, the thought of Bond-like high rollers sipping whiskey and playing Blackjack connotes a certain level of luxury, but the red, black, and green of...

Saturday, January 21, 2012
Discontinued

I don't think The Chippendales are in any danger, but the Nice Jewish Guys Calendar is certainly a good alternative. And you can display it proudly when Mom and Dad come over, or just make a quick switch before they arrive....

Thursday, September 27, 2012
$48 from Etsy »

I know your toddler is a unique and special snowflake, but now you can turn him into a programmable, monotone android too and revel in the irony! Carolyn Caffelle calls her R2D2 onesie and hat a costume, though I think everyone...

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Nope, they're not drawings, they're not Photoshopped, and they don't exist only in the realms of Cool World and Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Cartoon Bags, by JumpFromPaper's dynamically creative, Taipei-based designers Chay Su...

Wednesday, August 14, 2013
$18,611 from Firebox.com »

Time to brush up on curving the cue ball. Here are a few observations about bananas and pool and Banana Pool Tables:...

Monday, June 11, 2012
$9.50 from Man Can »

Man Cans. Scented candles for men. No. For Men. Endorsed by Thor, Indiana Jones, and the Dos Equis guy. This one smells like a spent shotgun shell. At $9.50, it also smells like I'm done looking for a Father's Day gift, and...

Thursday, September 22, 2011
$32.98 from Amazon »

This opaque white curtain will make your unsuspecting guests crap in their pants when they walk into your bathroom to crap in your toilet. Possible side effects may include... a stroke, heart attack and worst of all... crying....

Tuesday, April 17, 2012
$48.37 from Amazon »

Another Saturday night and I ain't got nobody...but I do got a sick 16 1/2" solid cast metal Alien Spiked Tri-Blade Hand Claw coated in an antique brass and gun-metal finish, which I will shadow box with in front of the mirror...

Friday, April 12, 2013
$39.99 from Amazon »

Domo started out as a Japanese television network mascot. Then he began starring in skits during station breaks. Then he got made into an English-language manga series for the US and Canada, and then he got made into a toaster....

Tuesday, July 9, 2013
$99.80 from Amazon »

Who wants a pork chop, a salmon fillet, a bloody mary, or a piece of chocolate cake that tastes like it's spent hours slowly absorbing the apple wood of a smoker? In seconds, and without heat, the Smoking Gun portable food...

Wednesday, October 24, 2012
$19.15 from Etsy »

Minimalist prints work only for the rare group of people so ingrained in our culture and minds that a mere flip of hair, trademark accessory, or unmistakable body part identifies them to us. Think Elvis. Dorothy. Kim Kardashian....

Tuesday, April 2, 2013
$61.56 - $82.26 from Amazon »

To me, the idea of smelling like a bomb of anything connotes an unpleasantly strong and cloying odor, and when I think of a bomb of spices all that comes to mind are the scents that permeate my clothes, my hair, my skin, my...

Tuesday, November 5, 2013
$11.66 from Amazon »

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a living creature was stirring…but the undead ones were ampin' up to grub on some jolly fat man flesh....

Monday, August 13, 2012

Italian designer Rodolfo Rocchetti has turned three menacing beasts of the jungle into living room sofas: the tiger; the panther; and, most nightmarishly of all, the cow. Moooooo. Ugh, who decided cows were acceptable subjects...

Monday, January 13, 2014
$15.01 from Amazon »

Sorry, it's not that kind of anatomy. Currently in its 4th Edition, The Anatomy Coloring Book has been simultaneously dazzling its doodlers and teaching them the basics of anatomical structures for more than 35 years. Included...

Wednesday, November 7, 2012
$3.99 - $19.99 from Cafe Press »

Zach Golden's cookbook What the F*@# Should I Make for Dinner has spawned a culinary F-bomb phenomenon. Now the word "Fuck" is being inserted with reckless abandon into otherwise perfunctory statements about grocery runs...

Sunday, March 4, 2012
$24 from ideacious »

Have proper lawn darts impaled enough toddlers and chihuahuas that they've been outlawed? Is it Mother Necessity who popped out these dart-bottle rocket hybrids, or did ideacious founder and industrial designer, Joshua Brasse...

Tuesday, September 17, 2013
$199.95 from Hammacher Schlemmer »

I don't know if I should be more afraid that this 12-foot-tall inflatable spider will bite me or force me to listen to it sing Broadway showtunes. It looks like Elvira mixed with Ursula the sea witch mixed with one of the...

Wednesday, July 24, 2013
$29.99 from Amazon »

Companion Cubes. Companion Ice Cubes. A Captain Obvious merchandising exploit that kind of manages not to sacrifice coolness in spite of it. Even those unfamiliar with the Portal universe might gravitate towards this silicone...

Thursday, October 24, 2013
$16.98 from Amazon »

Well let's just take the modicum of elbow grease required to enjoy an ass fattener alongside a campfire out of the s'mores creation equation entirely. Now I don't even have to engage my upper body muscles supporting and rotating...

Friday, July 26, 2013
$183 from Stadt Bedarf »

This balcony rail table attachment can help you grow flowers, read the paper, type your reports and breakup emails, grill some meat, and serve booze all without legs and floor space consumption! The German-made balKonzept...

Thursday, September 13, 2012

And not only does it look like running water, but it emulates the molecule's flow. The more you crank on the Light Drop Wall Lamp's taps, the more wattage its faucets crank out. Rafael Morgan's plumbing fixture illumination...

Thursday, November 29, 2012
$13 from Etsy »

Mmm, handmade Star Wars chocolates. The best thing to come out of the Galactic Republic since the Intergalactic Identity Management Agency cleared Planet Earth for passports. Nikki Belleperche's Force-injecting variety pack...

Saturday, April 14, 2012
$225 from Etsy »

Epileptics, please approach with caution. Everyone else, behold: hula hoop begat glow-in-the-dark hula hoop begat LED hula hoop begat cascading double rainbow LED hula hoop. This dual-circuit ring o' Roy G Biv is the definitive...

Thursday, January 31, 2013
$18 from Etsy »

Where did you grow up? Where's the greatest place you've ever been? Where did you bury your AC Slater acid washed pleated jeans for safe keeping? Where was your first kiss with Elle MacPherson...'s photo on the cover of the...

Friday, April 20, 2012
$2,700 from Etsy »

She's curvaceous, stunning, and sings like a bird. A little hollow on the inside, but, hey, no one's perfect. Guitar visionary Paul Celentano, who also brought us the Transformers and Pac Man Ukuleles, strikes yet another...