A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Friday, June 22, 2012

Jolly Rogers, Hearts that say "Mom", Tweety Birds, sure they're gumball machine classics when it comes to temporary tattoos, but what about getting tatted out for 2 to 3 days in a design that expresses true individuality and...

Thursday, April 11, 2013
$49.99 from Trakdot »

Trakdot luggage finders enjoyed a grand reception at CES 2013, and the company is now gearing up for its initial propagation of Trakdots into the world on June 24, 2013. The palm-sized suitcase insert collaborates with an...

Saturday, October 5, 2013
$29.99 from ThinkGeek »

Talk about taking one for the team. I wouldn't kick that thing. I'd gingerly pick it up, tuck it under my arm, and run for my life as it rained yellow cards. The Death Star soccer ball is a limited edition release, part of some Star Wars Celebration Europe II series of merchandise. So of course it's soccer-themed. And you can save your breath contacting the manufacturer to politely inquire about...

Wednesday, June 5, 2013
$220 - $260 from Fluoa »

I wonder if the Fusion ergonomic backpack will still follow the natural curves of my posterior after I stuff it to the brim with a laptop, 2 full-size and 3 fun-size Snickers bars, 1 box of Barbara's Peanut Butter Puffins...

Friday, November 2, 2012
$241.12 from Master of Malt »

The holidays. A season of (incredibly long and growing longer) buildup. Of personal reflection. Of getting comprehensively sloshed and drowning the sorrows generated by such a long flippin' buildup and the unhappy outcome...

Monday, February 13, 2012
$199 from DNA 11 »

If you're a Double Helix Fan Club member, but can't make it to Japan to clone your face, and find the prospect of being mug-melded with your sister a little disturbing, check out this subtler artistic representation of your DNA. DNA portraits map a portion of their subjects' unique genetic code, and print it in any of 25 custom color combinations on a canvas ready for framing and proud display....

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

When speaking of our health, of preventing the ingestion of fecal matter thrust into the air during the toilet flushing process, is there really a need to mince words? Beat around the bush? Employ euphemisms? Woodpecker Laboratories...

Monday, August 27, 2012
$15.66 from My eFox »

Everyone will be glad to know this Blood Pool Pillow comes with a 1-year warranty. Like, in case it evaporates or absorbs into the bedsheets or something, I guess. The deep red velvet casing is stuffed to a 3D level of equal...

Saturday, July 20, 2013
$19.99 from Amazon »

We as humans have such cold-blooded and violent feelings towards insects as a species. We could sympathetically and euphemistically "eliminate" and "dispose of" them, but instead we swat, squash, zap, smash, exterminate, and...

Wednesday, September 4, 2013
$399.95 - $469.95 from Zip Line Gear »

Even though Viper's Deluxe Zip Line Kit is rated for passengers of up to 350 pounds almost all of the photos I could find depict only kids using it. You know why? Because all of the adults who would like to partake in this...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

25 years of life in Springfield are honored with a potato. Plus some bulbous eyes, a scruffy muzzle, and Woo hoo! a pink-frosted donut with rainbow sprinkles. Mr. Potato Head Homer Simpson has been released as an homage to...

Wednesday, September 5, 2012
$23 from OPPO »

Oh man, I really hope dogs aren't smarter than we think they are. Does it get more humiliating than a Duckface Muzzle? Quack, an OPPO Japan bit of "You poor canine bastard" is a soft silicone dog muzzle available in yellow...

Sunday, March 3, 2013
$36.45 from Amazon »

Today I will perform for the millions clicking on my YouTube shower curtain a rendition of Mr. Big's "To Be With You" as I lather my hair, followed by a standup routine about how I don't eat bivalves or things that taste like...

Wednesday, October 17, 2012
By: WIZDISH

The WizDish is on a quest to make virtual reality and first-person gaming even more active and interactive without incurring costs prohibitive to 98% of the people who enjoy virtual reality and first-person gaming. The locomotion...

Wednesday, February 27, 2013
$15 - $38 from Etsy »

Likelihood I would kill a pet jellyfish: 100%. Likelihood I would kill a potted plant: 98%. Likelihood I would kill a jellyfish air plant: 75%. Because Etsy shop Petit Beast swears on its spiky sea urchin shells that caring...

Saturday, May 4, 2013
$379 from Aark Collective »

The Aark black-on-black watch goes by the name of Iconic, but I feel it would be more appropriately termed Black Don't Crack because that is more catchy and memorable, as well as perhaps the truest adage ever coined. I mean...

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Suck it, chocolate bunnies! This Easter all the cool kiddies want chocolate craniums cast from real human skulls! OK, so how many comments of outrage am I going to get when I point out that partaking in a piece of dark chocolate...

Monday, October 15, 2012
Discontinued

Much like the AdrenaSuit Socrates Everlasting Socks, or SocSocks, employ a military grade Kevlar|Carbon Matrix that will render you impenetrable. OK fine, it will just render the socks impenetrable. But still, a pair of foot...

Thursday, March 27, 2014
$11.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Why do I need a cookie cutter with a bite taken out of it? I can do this myself. In fact, when I have cookies taking bites out of them is pretty much all I do. I like the shark though. Kids might dig this whole Snack Attack...

Thursday, August 29, 2013
$1,400 from Makerbot »

I don't know if I really need to 3D scan anything--well nothing that would fit within the MakerBot Digitizer's 8" diameter confines, winkwinknudgenugde--and I definitely know I do not have $1,400, but I like that little gnome....

Friday, December 7, 2012
$39.95 from Homemade Gin »

Mommy, where does gin come from? Vodka, Bobby. Gin comes from vodka. At least if it's homemade. Shunning expensive, and possibly illegal, distilling equipment, the Homemade Gin Kit allows those who possess it to create intoxicatingly...

Thursday, September 12, 2013
$96.93 from Amazon »

I don't know why Vornado needs four words--Whole Room Air Circulator--to describe what I can sum up in two: Super Fan. Truly. I've had many occasions on which to use one of these compact wind makers, namely any time my friend...

Monday, November 12, 2012
Sold Out from Etsy »

For the dog: Italian greyhounds seem like fragile, sensitive creatures, so I'm going to let the fact that you're wearing a canine snowsuit with a 270-degree hood drawstringed tightly around your head in this photo slide without...

Saturday, February 18, 2012
$9,650 - $10,795 from InboxFitness »

Monowheels, or monocycles--huge, single-track circus contraptions riders sit inside instead of on top of--have been around since the late 19th century, and were at one point proposed for use as a serious mode of transportation....

Sunday, September 30, 2012
$1,167 from Crealev »

Crealev designer Angela Jansen has taken a machete to boring old lamp shades, and thrown in some magnet magic to keep their hacked off top half afloat after the attack. The Silhouette, a conical shade, and the Eclipse, a more...

Tuesday, March 6, 2012
$149 from Custom Made »

Your face on the wedding cake topper? Hell yeah! This is, after all your mother f'in' day, and for once, just once, everything damn well should be all about you! Oh, and whomever that person standing next to you in front of...

Thursday, August 9, 2012

The PRJ016 iPhone 4 Micro Projector is a revamped version of Sanwa's original smartphone sleeve, which magnifies handheld microcosmic visuals, and then blares them into macrocosm across walls or white screens for large format...

Sunday, December 9, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

iPood. The onesie that states the obvious, perpetual reality for chilluns between the ages of 6 and 18 months old. And instead of a button for blasting its volume, the iPood comes with a button that aids kiddos in blasting...

Wednesday, August 17, 2011
$33 from Jet Pens »

There is nothing better than knowing you're writing down your daily to do list (probably the same damn stuff you wrote down the day before, and before that) with a superior writing instrument. And that's exactly what this...

Wednesday, March 13, 2013
$11.66 from Amazon »

The Art of Fixing Things. That's some euphemistic phrasing right there. Probably coined by a woman for other women to use in manipulating husbands, boyfriends, male buddies, and random dudes at the gym who appear to be able...

Sunday, April 22, 2012

No matter the context, the topic of head always seems to be a controversial one. Does it enhance the experience or cheapen it? How much is too much? Do you let others know when they get a little bit stuck to their face? The...

Saturday, March 10, 2012
$224.73 from Amazon »

The KettlePizza insert takes homely, mediocre 22.5" kettle grills, such as Webers and Stoks, and magically transforms them into flashy, gourmet, pseudo-woodfired pizza ovens capable of putting New York slices, Chicago deep...

Tuesday, October 30, 2012
By: Behance

The latest in shoebox living, Buse Ustun of Ankara, Turkey created VIA particularly for young adult couples cohabitating in tiny apartments with limited kitchen space. The compact, modular cooker incorporates all major kitchen...

Wednesday, December 12, 2012
$399 - $1,300 from Drive a Tank »

Tank camp? Oh boy, I've been looking for an excuse to go to Kasota, Minnesota! The Drive a Tank family owns and operates this adrenaline-jacking experience 90 minutes outside of Minneapolis, during which participants can not...

Tuesday, July 30, 2013
$15k from Scott Morrison »

Since wood craftsman Scott Morrison both takes pride in the quality of his work and operates as a one-man show, his design award-winning Rocker Cradle will be cost prohibitive for the vast majority of its admirers. However...

Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Athletic apparel brand Nathan's Dome Light beanie has a strip of LEDs on both its front and back sides so that other people can watch where I'm going and get out of my way. Because when dusk falls I'm usually otherwise occupied...

Monday, October 24, 2011
$52 from Ebay »

It is not often we come across something so special and unique. Who knew today would be that day? I woke up this morning in a Chewbacco-less world. Now, today, I walk around with a new confidence in mankind. If collectively...

Tuesday, July 16, 2013
$10.35 from Amazon »

A collection of pugs who got caught being the a-holes they are. Like Gonzo, 9-1/2" tall, 16 pounds, charged and booked for shoplifting. I assumed he stole his owner's ability to select an appealing dog breed, but evidently...

Tuesday, January 14, 2014
$99 from Netatmo »

Business coach, life coach, fitness coach, diet coach, and now add sun coach to the list of people I pay to help me avert F'ing up. Except June isn't a person. She (I'll go ahead and personify her though) is a bracelet and...

Tuesday, October 8, 2013
$79.95 from Amazon »

In a way the SinuPulse Nasal Irrigation System is just as gross as Nosefrida the Snotsucker nasal aspirator due to their similar purposes in life: extractors of snot. But in a way it's not because the Nosefrida is intended...

Friday, May 31, 2013
$249 from Griz Coat »

Just in time for summer! A full-length, faux fur coat with a mother fucking wolf head. On the one hand, the creators of Griz Coats have dissed the brand's icon in favor of this lupine addition to their line of crafty and menacing...

Tuesday, September 25, 2012
$1,235 from TradeMe »

A set of dueling pistols created by Kiwi artist Bruce Mahalski is now up for auction with a starting bid of around $1,235 American dollars. They include spare bullets and come in a custom-altered case with blood-red inlay...

Thursday, June 20, 2013
$24.95 from Amazon »

While I don't condone sleeping on a tie at work, I must say I have generally found my productivity (and genius!) levels to be highest after a few swigs of Grey Goose. So drinking out of a tie at work = acceptable. In moderation...

Tuesday, October 22, 2013
$119.97 from Amazon »

I feel like the Aero Sphere fan, a sculptural household appliance imported from Japan, holds the power to blow more than cool air. Like all we have to do is play with it long enough--or figure out how to unlock a level--and...

Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Discontinued

Cloud Strife needs some help wielding his massive Buster Sword and Zack seems to be busy at the moment. Want to wear it around your neck? Chainmail mastro Michelle has hand woven a 23" gunmetal chain to support its hefty length...

Sunday, July 15, 2012
$575 from Etsy »

San Diego Comic-Con may be winding down, but the San Romero zombie apocalypse is just amping up. And if you're going to splice off heads and bifurcate torsos chainsaw-wielding-Juliet style when it gets here, you're gonna need...

Friday, August 12, 2011
$25.22 from Amazon »

This is a big ass shark that gets filled with helium so you can control who you'd like to kill with it. Check out the video after the jump for a better visualization of what I'm saying here. This thing looks pretty awesome...

Monday, May 7, 2012
$7.20 from Amazon »

Mmm, from dead fetus to sharp shooter. I'm going to take a shot at loading the Hand Gun Egg Fryer Mold into the Rule of Thirds, as described by my 9th grade English teacher. He said that a third of the people we meet throughout...

Friday, March 23, 2012
$399.99 from Marshall Fridge »

The Marshall amp replica refrigerator, signed by Jim Marshall, emblazoned with authentic Marshall logos, and fitted with a real Marshall facing has a paradoxically acoustic effect: it makes your brews and carbonated shots...

Thursday, September 20, 2012
Discontinued

What better to test out your Ghostbusters Proton Backpack and Ghost Trap replicas on than a Life-Size Slimer? The wall-mounted, ecto-green spectacle even thrusts forth in 3D, though thankfully artist Jeff Teo cast him in rigid...

Saturday, March 24, 2012
$54.99 from Home Wet Bar »

There's a reason they invented the Remote Control Drink & Snack Float. It's the same reason they call it "lazing" in the pool. It's because I'm being lazy. And because sometimes when I'm being lazy I get thirsty. And kind...

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

NCC-1701 is ready for reception of coasters, remote controls, back issues of Scientific American, and holey crew-socked feet. Craftsman Barry Shields spent a month forging the USS Enterprise from ash, poplar, and cherry woods...

Thursday, September 19, 2013
$149 - $179 from VacuVita »

VacuVita is a vacuum-powered food preservation system that sets itself apart by not requiring the purchase and use of special plastic bags that shrivel up around their contents and make all food look like animal intestines....

Thursday, November 29, 2012
$152 from PrezzyBox »

At first I thought this was an actual washing machine/suitcase combo. Like for moms to tote around and use to instantly remove the spit-up and dirt and, in my case, Bloody Marys, from their kids' perpetually soiled clothes....

Wednesday, March 20, 2013
$129.95 - $199.95 from Hammacher Schlemmer »

It's a Back of the Door Cabinet. Seven words, and my work is done....

Wednesday, May 29, 2013
$99 from Melon »

Melon says, "Imagine if you could see and understand the invisible activity of your brain." Hmmm. Given that the brain activity of which I am conscious would probably get me ejected from many public places and kicked in the...

Friday, November 8, 2013
$174.53 from Snow Inn »

Sort of a butt ski, sort of a sled, sort of a snow kart. The Yooner is sort of a lot of things by physical definition, but by use, maker TSL Outdoor would say it is only a thrilling, effortless, and, most importantly, learning...

Saturday, February 23, 2013
$19.25 from Amazon »

I know this horse head mask is meant to be grossly unsettling to the viewer, but when I look at it all I can think of is Kramer Tourette's-ing out "Gggiiiddy up" and I feel more amused than disturbed. I imagine the expression...

Friday, February 3, 2012
$0.93 from Amazon »

Red Solo cup, I fill you up. And am way less likely to drop you in someone's lap now that you are made of foam instead of cheap plastic that accrues grip-compromising condensation like Lindsay Lohan accrues pardons for criminal...

Monday, October 7, 2013
$270 from Amazon »

Boldly go into a dark room, and illuminate it as no man has done before. Well, no man save for the other men out there with taste and Trekkie fanaticism strong enough to persuade them to buy a Starship Enterprise ceiling light...

Thursday, November 21, 2013
$17.08 from Amazon »

If we were to step into reality for a brief moment, I guess we would concur that the opportunity to apply combat marksmanship and self-defense training to an encounter with an actual zombie is probably never going to arise....

Friday, June 22, 2012
$64.95 from Etsy »

Holy crap, can you imagine how many cookies the Cookie Monster would eat if he were high? Possibly all the cookies in the world. Which in a way would be interesting to witness, but in a bigger way very sad, because then I...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013
$39.99 - $99.99 from Amazon »

The beauty of Limeade Blast stems from the suckage of smartphones and tablets. Both that they suck up battery power like a 12-pound newborn on a teat, and that this inadequacy of smartphone and tablet batteries really sucks....

Friday, February 24, 2012

Stress-relieving pottery that doesn't require the presence of Patrick Swayze's ghost? Sign us up! The Shouting Vase is a bulbous fabrication of ABS resin that, when placed against your lips, absorbs and quiets the loudest...

Monday, May 28, 2012
$10.33 from Amazon »

After all the recent hype over breastfeeding, I think it's about time we returned to a matter of real public interest: poo. Specifically, dropping a deuce at the office. How to Poo at Work is the #1 guide for handling the...

Sunday, January 15, 2012
$93.30 from Amazon »

For hosts, no more contracting pink eye or ocular herpes from smooshing your cornea against the peephole. For guests, no more wondering how much worse your wide hips or severe jaw line look magnified and distorted on the other...

Friday, January 24, 2014
$8.89 from Amazon »

They call them the Booger Buddies. I call them the newest additions to my Super Bowl XLVIII meat buffet. Nothing like a squirt of mustard from the nostrils of an ooga-booga-looking monster (with impeccable oral hygiene) to...

Friday, November 23, 2012
$18.57 from Amazon »

Now that we've got Thanksgiving out of the way, it's time to deck the halls, fire up the "Jingle Bells" sing-a-longs, celebrate Jesus, and eat cheese. Cheesus Christ, a cheese grater that--like many folks' Sunday rituals and...