Milk for Santa's cookies? Lame. This year I'm leaving out a can of Maple Stream instead, and letting 7 fluid ounces of sprayable maple syrup help him wash down the peanut butter blossoms, Corn Flake wreaths, and gingerbread...

The Peugeot Clef du Vin Wine Tool claims it can age a wine one year for every second its "patented metal alloy" is in contact with the liquid. Wow. Now I know metals, and their alloy offsprings, are amazing - I mean...

These Vintage Bookshelf Board Games from WS Game Company are, to quote the late, great Chris Farley, awesome! I mean, have a gander yourself. Vintage Monopoly folded and packed up all tidy to look like a book: awesome!...

Are you ready for a half-pound, 930-calorie Fruit Loop? No, not half a pound and 930 calories worth of Froot Loops*, a single Fruit Loop weighing 6.7 ounces and packing 930 cals into the happy...but maybe turning sad...

Oooh, freshly picked olives from...your living room? If you decide to keep PlantOGram's live Frantoio Olive Container Tree indoors, yep. Freshly picked olives direct from your living room. Olive it!...

From MysteryVibe: You wear it on your penis. And it vibrates. Not what you expected? Well, expect an unbelievably good time with the new male vibrator that turns you into her favorite vibrator - Tenuto Mini. It's pocket-sized...

I wouldn't have named it the Dinosaur Hanukkah Menorah. I would have called it the T-Rex Dinosorah. But, I don't work for Zion Judaica Ltd, and I'm not "Margarita," the person who designed this cretaceous candle holder...

Dudes, do you feel time passing by? No? Well. You're either too young, or you've never touched a magnetic ball bearing watch before. The first one I ever saw, the Bradley Tactile Watch, was originally made with the blind...

Third Assist's vintage-style hockey gloves could eliminate fights in the sport. Because who's ever gonna wanna take these sweet throwback gloves off? I wouldn't. Even to punch some a-hole's teeth out...

Become the President of the PEN15 Club with a Offensive Pens 15-pack. Haha, sike! It's just a 5-pack. Are you mildly irritated yet? Well, follow me, my dudes and ladies, and we'll make our way to fully offended in 250...

Nothin' says, Happy Holidays! like a 7.5' x 4' Christmas Vacation Airblown Cousin Eddie's RV in your front yard. Especially if...say it with me, dudes...the shitter's full...

The ghost of Patrick Swayze not included. Sculpd Pottery Kits are beginner-level boxes of all the (probably very messy) goods you'll need to sculpt, carve, paint, and varnish your own clay masterpieces. ... Or at least...

The Bookie Cushion, a whoopee cushion Bookmark from Fred, accomplishes something very rare: it manages to be both the perfect gift for kids and the perfect gift for Dad this holiday season. It could easily slip into your...

Sarah Knight brings all her F*cks together in No F*cks Given: Naughty Words to Live By. The book is a compilation of the "no-bullsh*t, life-changing advice" she offers in her 5 previous F*ck-filled books: The Life-Changing...

Who wants to take a shot from the Monkey's Fist Espresso Cup? Maker Texas Mud Monger says this espresso sipper is "for all the nautical enthusiasts out there," but I would add it is also for all the enthusiasts of clubbing...

Welcome to Edition 169 of What Is This Thing?, my recurring visual riddle series consisting of one simple photo - see above - and one simple question: what is this thing?...

The Interactive Glow in The Dark T-Shirt from Illuminated Apparel will have its wearers beaming. A great gift for kids and teens (and also probably people on mushrooms, ye who live in psilocybin-legal states) the DIY...

The Hypelev sneaker stand enables anyone - even you - to defy gravity with a pair of Air Jordans just like Michael. The only catch: you can't be wearing them. The Hypelev from Everknown is a levitating display stand for...

An 88-piece Champagne Bottle Balloon Kit you can inflate and use to decorate down the stairs, up the wall, arcing over the window, any which way you want?! This DIY decor looks like a job for...not this dude. Uh-uh. No...

Make Christmas spectacularly silver (-haired) and Golden (Girls) this year with a set of glass Golden Girls Christmas Ornaments. Head-to-toe you'll get Dorothy, Blanche, Rose, and Sophia in moderate facial likenesses...