A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Wednesday, September 12, 2012
$25 from Brad McGinty »

Who isn't a fan of checking out innards these days? Particularly when the innards belong to our favorite film creatures--Mogwais, Gremlins, Martians, Predators, Xenomorphs--and particularly when the versions we used to cut...

Tuesday, July 9, 2013
$99.95 from Amazon »

Who wants a pork chop, a salmon fillet, a bloody mary, or a piece of chocolate cake that tastes like it's spent hours slowly absorbing the apple wood of a smoker? In seconds, and without heat, the Smoking Gun portable food...

Wednesday, October 31, 2012
$15.99 from Amazon »

Communication, so the saying goes, is key. How appropriate then for the bilinguists of the Galactic Republic to provide us with this Translator Ring, a finger-sized key to communicating with the Huttese. Imagine how Jabba would soften towards you if only you could tell him a joke in his native tongue. Tubby alien gangsters love jokes. Jokes and quotes from The Princess Bride. (Because fictional...

Monday, June 3, 2013
By: Behance

One of the first things you learn at Carulla Cooking School in Bogota, Colombia is how to use a knife. That's after you learn one of the first things you learn in Bogota, Colombia, which is how to use a gun (and where to buy...

Tuesday, March 13, 2012
$14.50 from Amazon »

A 3" x 1" alarm that attaches to any door or window, and fires a powerful siren if anyone enters. It's the perfect companion for travelers, people with nosy mothers and girlfriends, and the inexplicably paranoid. In addition...

Thursday, January 3, 2013
$7.53 from Amazon »

The extent of Amazon's grenade knife description: "Looks like a grenade." Hmmm...sold! I'm such an easy target for advertisers. Don Draper could probably sell me a pile of gorilla shit. He could probably sell me a ticket to a live double feature of Cats and Celtic Woman. And the worst part is, it would be the second time I've bought one of them....

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

NCC-1701 is ready for reception of coasters, remote controls, back issues of Scientific American, and holey crew-socked feet. Craftsman Barry Shields spent a month forging the USS Enterprise from ash, poplar, and cherry woods...

Friday, March 8, 2013
$12.99 from Amazon »

This idea of hanging strips of pork candy on the Makin' Bacon microwave rack seems preferable to my grandma's method of pounding cooked pieces between an entire roll of paper towels. No speck of grease goes unabsorbed! She...

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Miso Soup Design, bad move releasing photos of the Anti-loneliness Ramen Bowl before you have actual Anti-loneliness Ramen Bowls to sell. Now everyone wants one, everyone is pestering you to buy one, and the bowls' target...

Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Discontinued

Lionel Richie is one of those weird celebrities like Demi Moore and Kate Winselt who kind of starts looking better as he gets older. See: Lionel Richie circa 1983. And: Lionel Richie now. His songs, of course, have always...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Monday, May 27, 2013
$12.98 - $63.99 from Amazon »

On the one hand, a sippy wine glass is really dumb. But on the other, it is kind of useful, as wine is very easy to knock over or dribble on your brand new Wool & Prince button-up when someone tells one of the funniest jokes...

Thursday, April 25, 2013
$11.28 from Amazon »

Not only is this item called Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce, but it's sold by a vendor named Professor Phardtpounders. How tacky and immature. I want some. Specifically, I want a concoction of Scotch bonnet peppers, mustard, modified...

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Chrono-Shredder is a clock, a calendar, a reminder that those who sit at home and simply watch time go by have lives filled with nothing but growing piles of shit on the floor. Poetic, no? Susanna Hertrich combines machine...

Saturday, October 27, 2012
$4,945 - $5,695 from Pen Boutique »

Even as a Batman die-hard, I'm pretty sure that if I had $5,000 to spend on Dark Knight products, I wouldn't go for a fountain pen. But different folks, different strokes, 'ey? And if you fancy yourself, say, a DC Comics poet...

Sunday, April 22, 2012
$4k from Choc Edge »

Choc Creator is a revolutionary Voltron of Americans' two favorite things to do: screw around on the computer and eat. The first commercial 3D chocolate printer, Choc Creator Version 1, employs 10 mL syringes filled with liquid...

Monday, December 3, 2012
$70 - $100 from Combat Humidor »

Combat Cigar Humidors take Made in America to the next level. The waterproof stogie canisters are also custom crafted to order by disabled Marine Corps veterans out of Spanish cedar encased in an M13 7.62 x 51 linked ammo...

Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Hey, a chess set that's fun to play with even for people who don't know how to play chess. Umbra brings the world of Wobble to its thinker's game, either to add some whimsy to what is otherwise an insufferably boring, hours-long...

Thursday, June 6, 2013
$10 from Lollyphile »

Oh, would that they were made of real breast milk...that would be F'ing sick. But in the grand spirit of edible items simply modeled after choice body parts*, the Lollyphile's Breast Milk Lollipops don't contain actual breast...

Wednesday, July 31, 2013
$225 from Take-A-Seat »

Obviously the most important element of tailgating is drinking. No one ever forgets to bring beer to the tailgate. Or the picnic. Or the post-outdoor-adventure celebration. We do, however, sometimes forget chairs. Or we use...

Monday, July 15, 2013
$19.95 from Amazon »

I think all kids should be given a Chalktrail and told to ride however they want around a big open driveway or parking lot. Then when they've finished a bunch of child psychologists can come in to examine and assess their...

Monday, October 1, 2012
$29.99 from Etsy »

Had I an oven in which to grow a bun, definitely a Skeleton Baby T-Shirt would be my preferred method of announcing it to the world. I wonder if wearing it would deter the nosy old hens who feel up preggo women's bellies...

Sunday, July 21, 2013
$19.95 from Amazon »

Point 1: Crafting traditional sushi rolls requires the finesse and fine motor skills of a surgeon. Point 2: Compact 3D squares of food look way cooler and more Willy Wonka magical than squat cylinders of it. Ergo: Bring on...

Thursday, September 20, 2012
Discontinued

What better to test out your Ghostbusters Proton Backpack and Ghost Trap replicas on than a Life-Size Slimer? The wall-mounted, ecto-green spectacle even thrusts forth in 3D, though thankfully artist Jeff Teo cast him in rigid...

Monday, January 2, 2012
$129.85 from Amazon »

Take new school back to the old school with this ghetto blaster fit for an iPhone. This is a true MP3 Ghetto Blaster that uses removable solid-state data storage. So, all you have to do is slam a thumb drive or SD card in...

Sunday, May 12, 2013
$519 from ID Cook »

Those days when it's hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk or the sun's bright enough to light ants on fire with a magnifying glass? The COOKUP 200 solar BBQ turns nearly every day into an over-easy-on-the-concrete-cruel-bug-exterminating...

Wednesday, October 23, 2013
$12,900 from Brevet »

Is it classy or trashy that Rolex has taken time to the casino? I mean, sure, the thought of Bond-like high rollers sipping whiskey and playing Blackjack connotes a certain level of luxury, but the red, black, and green of...

Thursday, August 1, 2013
$7.69 from Amazon »

Oh balls. I mean, oh geometric block shapes. Now even drinking my morning coffee is going to turn into an exercise in quick critical thinking and spatial recognition. At least it appears that heat from the liquid poured into...

Tuesday, January 8, 2013
$12 from Amazon »

True apple addicts don't have time to slough off the forbidden fruit's skin one strip at a time with a handheld peeler or their fingernails. And while other crank peelers technically get the job done expediently, their clunky...

Friday, February 24, 2012

Stress-relieving pottery that doesn't require the presence of Patrick Swayze's ghost? Sign us up! The Shouting Vase is a bulbous fabrication of ABS resin that, when placed against your lips, absorbs and quiets the loudest...

Sunday, March 31, 2013
$69.95 from Automatic »

The Automatic smartphone app had me at "always remembers where you parked your car." That alone is going to save me at least 4 hours a week. Its suggestions on speed and braking adjustments to increase gas mileage, instant...

Wednesday, April 3, 2013
$28 from David Cole »

Unlike the Grizzly Robotic Utility Vehicle, this nugget of LEGO taxidermy would be way cooler if it were bigger. When I first saw it I thought it was a life-size LEGO deer head and I was like, "Yahtzee! Cornelius is gonna...

Tuesday, April 3, 2012
$849 from Etsy »

Two steps forward, meet five steps back. For those of us who missed out on all the fun and carpal tunnel syndrome the typewriter generation had, or for those simply looking for an apparatus on which their grandmas can type...

Wednesday, November 7, 2012
$3.99 - $19.99 from Cafe Press »

Zach Golden's cookbook What the F*@# Should I Make for Dinner has spawned a culinary F-bomb phenomenon. Now the word "Fuck" is being inserted with reckless abandon into otherwise perfunctory statements about grocery runs...

Saturday, November 24, 2012
$22.77 from Amazon »

One Bubble Wrap Calendar reviewer on Amazon recommends abstaining from an entire month of daily extra-large bubble popping satisfaction, and then at day 30 or 31 (fine, or 28) running your thumb down the whole row of Mankind's...

Monday, March 5, 2012
$400 from Custom Made »

Bust out some some bluesy jams, and tell Siri to call you "BB King" with these cigar box guitars, in tobacco brands Padron 9 and El Baton. The smoke boxes are detailed and expanded, with fretted butternut necks and rosewood...

Friday, May 3, 2013
$13 from Mama Walker »

Mama said WHAT? Mama said 2 parts Maple Bacon to 1 part Jameson for a breakfast of champions. Mama Walker's Breakfast Liqueurs cater to legit drinkers, legit breakfast lovers, and old people with no teeth who must follow a...

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Friday, April 26, 2013
$19 - $39 from Onehundred »

I have my doubts that Pucs wouldn't bludgeon me in the teeth every time I took a drink from a glass containing them, but otherwise they seem pretty terrific. The stainless steel beverage coolers renounce the term "ice cubes"...

Friday, August 19, 2011
Discontinued

I need one of these for sure. Not just for display either.... For killin'! Some creepy dude named The Somber Raven made these Vampire Killing Kits and they're pretty legit. You can tell they're what's bolstering him from downtrodden...

Tuesday, August 9, 2011
$74 from Etsy »

Finally. A way to combine your one true love and the girl you're currently boning. This handmade, handcrafted dress will surely lead to a handjob if you're smart enough to buy one for your girl....

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
$425 from Kate Bauman »

When you can't remember if Mama said you can't hurry love, or if Mama said knock you out, it's best to cover all bases. These gleaming symbols of betrothal let everyone you encounter know you are blissfully off the market...

Thursday, March 8, 2012
$9.21 from Amazon »

This nifty Peanut Butter & Jelly Wallet with photo-real fabric looks so authentic petty thieves and street urchins will never suspect it's housing your cash and credit cards. On the flip side, beware of fat kids. Each sandwich...

Monday, December 26, 2011
$8.99 from Vat 19 »

A sarcastic spin on the traditional fortune cookie, unfortunate cookies tell it like it is. Each pack includes 10 witty, fun and sometimes scathing or disgusting fortunes that are sure to surprise whoever cracks them open...

Thursday, May 2, 2013
$1,450 from Etsy »

The steampunk Nintendo controller coffee table isn't fully-functional like other versions of Charles Lushear's take on the iconic gaming system, but on the bright side, this means it is less likely to get broken during heated...

Monday, October 24, 2011
$52 from Ebay »

It is not often we come across something so special and unique. Who knew today would be that day? I woke up this morning in a Chewbacco-less world. Now, today, I walk around with a new confidence in mankind. If collectively...

Saturday, September 28, 2013
$299 from Impossible »

The Impossible Instant Lab is an expandable photo processor that can intake any digital image from an iPhone or iPod Touch and output a Polaroid-style analog photo in seconds. Used in combination with a free Impossible Project...

Friday, July 26, 2013
$183 from Stadt Bedarf »

This balcony rail table attachment can help you grow flowers, read the paper, type your reports and breakup emails, grill some meat, and serve booze all without legs and floor space consumption! The German-made balKonzept...

Thursday, June 27, 2013
$24.95 from Amazon »

I see the Fireside Fishing Pole and I see you and me going fishing in the dark. Lying on our backs and counting the stars. Where the cooool grass gr-oh-oh-ows. Yeah I like country music, so the fried okra what? You know who...

Wednesday, September 7, 2011
$39 from ThinkGeek »

Imagine this: You're on a date. As usual, things aren't going very well. She's finished her 3rd drink and still sees a slack jawed lummox when she looks across the table. The tab arrives. You, being the sucker that you are...

Tuesday, October 22, 2013
$23.70 from Amazon »

I enjoy fiddling with lasers--particularly those than can burn my eye out--but I'm not sure how I'm going to like one whose use also requires a certain amount of intellectual fortitude. Or, as the Laser Maze prefers to call...

Tuesday, February 14, 2012
By: Youtube

Abraham Lincoln's political career, the Civil War, slavery in The South--conspiracy theorists have been saying it for over a century, and now Seth Grahame-Smith's thinly-veiled novel, plus Tim Burton's twisted interpretive...

Monday, April 15, 2013
$2,580 from Design Collectors »

Vitra's MVS Chaise, named for its Belgian designer, Maarten Van Severen, applies ergonomic principles similar to those of the Zero Gravity Recliner, but adopts an even slimmer profile and sleeker, minimalist lines to double...

Wednesday, October 24, 2012
$19.15 from Etsy »

Minimalist prints work only for the rare group of people so ingrained in our culture and minds that a mere flip of hair, trademark accessory, or unmistakable body part identifies them to us. Think Elvis. Dorothy. Kim Kardashian....

Thursday, August 25, 2011
Discontinued

Do you really want to irritate your wife? Then demand that this be your wedding ring. Why not? Kind of makes a statement to would be criminals too. You're a dude wearing a black steel ring... you're a dude not to be messed...

Monday, August 13, 2012

Italian designer Rodolfo Rocchetti has turned three menacing beasts of the jungle into living room sofas: the tiger; the panther; and, most nightmarishly of all, the cow. Moooooo. Ugh, who decided cows were acceptable subjects...

Tuesday, February 12, 2013
$24 - $39 from Voy Voy »

This yuppy East Coast trend baffles me. But VoyVoy built-in pocket square T-shirts constitute one I could support without feeling like a pretentious tool. Because unlike numerous layered Polos with their collars up, pocket...

Friday, September 27, 2013
$171.98 from Amazon »

I feel like this steel mesh ball should contain, like, a set of conjoined twin brothers on motorcycles, not just a pile of logs and flames. No worries, though. I'm sure the Ball of Fire can go from outdoor fireplace to Globe...

Tuesday, May 7, 2013
$79 - $100 from LiddUp »

The LiddUp cooler's interior LED lining caters to bonfires, backyard BBQs, campsites, and anywhere else high on the drinking but low on the lighting levels normally present to assist partiers in determining what exactly they're...

Thursday, January 31, 2013
$18 from Etsy »

Where did you grow up? Where's the greatest place you've ever been? Where did you bury your AC Slater acid washed pleated jeans for safe keeping? Where was your first kiss with Elle MacPherson...'s photo on the cover of the...

Monday, June 10, 2013
$38 from The Fowndry »

I wonder if the birds who enter the Death Star birdhouse ever come out. If not, I wish it were a residence for those of the feline persuasion. Or better, I hope the birds do come out alive, but with mutated laser eyes so they...

Saturday, June 2, 2012
$159.99 from Amazon »

In these progressive times, more and more monsters are coming out from under the bed, and unabashedly scaring the bejeezus out of little kids and first time visitors to where the magic happens from right alongside it. The...

Thursday, September 22, 2011
$21.99 from Amazon »

This opaque white curtain will make your unsuspecting guests crap in their pants when they walk into your bathroom to crap in your toilet. Possible side effects may include... a stroke, heart attack and worst of all... crying....

Thursday, April 11, 2013
$2,460 from The D* Haus »

Taking a page out of Prince's book during Prince's Unpronounceable Symbolic Moniker years, this transformable coffee table calls itself D*. D'Asterisk? Dusterisk? Well if you rotate it 90 degrees clockwise it kind of looks...

Friday, September 27, 2013
$36.99 - $43.99 from Amazon »

The smooshy shark or the poofy puppy: I don't know which is more adorable, and therefore most responsible for my urge to slap it in the face. Can any woman look at this dog without longing to hold it in her arms? Can any man...

Sunday, February 10, 2013
$21.50 from Amazon »

You know what contentious pop culture debate on which I have no opinion? Nutella vs. Peanut Butter. Seriously Internet forums? You're warring over this? Each is a transcendentally delicious standout in the world of spreads....

Monday, May 20, 2013
$49 from Firefly »

Fireflies seem to be a popular metaphor for commodities of the free market lately. There's the Firefly Blue Laser Lamp, Firefly flying helicopter toys, Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka...mmmm...and our most current personification...

Thursday, November 29, 2012
$13 from Etsy »

Mmm, handmade Star Wars chocolates. The best thing to come out of the Galactic Republic since the Intergalactic Identity Management Agency cleared Planet Earth for passports. Nikki Belleperche's Force-injecting variety pack...

Wednesday, April 24, 2013
$222.19 from Amazon »

The potatoes spilling out of this ribbon fry cutter look delicious. For $100 I would eat them raw. I might also eat them raw if I were sure no one was watching. Easy to load, easy to retract and reload, I know once I start...

Saturday, January 21, 2012
Discontinued

I don't think The Chippendales are in any danger, but the Nice Jewish Guys Calendar is certainly a good alternative. And you can display it proudly when Mom and Dad come over, or just make a quick switch before they arrive....