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What's On Your Mind Pillows

$44.62 - $170.52 from Etsy »

Eat more bacon. Have more sex. How did Lynn from Sew English get ahold of my to-do list? More importantly, why'd she have to go applique it on some pillows? I mean, my mama's gonna see those every day when she makes my...

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Magnetic - Statically Charged Sticky Notes

$7 - $67 from Tesla Amazing »

OK, Magnetic, you win. The coolest new product I've seen all year. Created by appropriately titled Tesla Amazing, Magnetic is a line of notes, pads, boards, and sheets that act like sticky notes without the gummy, lint-collecting...

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Dragon Chess Set

$154.06 from Amazon »

Welp, judging by the bones fossilized in the platform uplifting this chess set's glass board, the biggest dragons have already been slain. Now all I gotta conquer are the baby fire breathers, and in all likelihood their...

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Elasto-Lok Tactical Gear Clip

$4.50 from Amazon »

Compatible with MOLLE bags (and probably, like, Jansport backpacks too), the Elasto-Lok from Duraflex is a multipurpose fastener that will secure anything from flashlights during camping trips to machetes during military...

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X15 Flamethrower

$1,599 from Throwflame.com »

People typically use flamethrowers to clear brush. And just like that, for the first time in my life I cannot think of anything I'd rather do today than go clear me some brush. Better than a firehose and almost as badass...

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Fight Club 2 Comic Series

It's all part of The Game. Wait, no, that's not it. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was... Nope, not that one either (but check out the latest homage to Keyser Soze here). The first rule of Fight Club is...yeah...

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PowerPot Camping Cooker & Charger

Back to the Future II didn't manage to predict this bizarre technological feat of the 2010s: cooking and charging your phone with the same device. (Not to mention chilling, blending, and charging your phone with the same...

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Animal Paper Clips

$7.09 - $16.04 from Amazon »

Midori makes over two dozen different animals ready to hold the wayward strands of your life together. At least the parts of it that are on paper. The company's animal D-Clips are the most precious paper clips I've ever...

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Pavlok - Habit-Breaking Shocking Wristband

$184.99 from Amazon »

If it's good enough for training the dog, it's good enough for training you. Pavlok thinks so anyway. And most people who were spanked as kids or repeatedly got hit in the face playing dodgeball would probably agree that...

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KeyBiner Carabiner Multi-Tool

$35 - $70 from Fortius Arms »

The KeyBiner calls itself a more refined version of the carabiner, but you might recognize it as a more souped up version of the KeySmart. Both remove some of the bulk and all of the jangle of schlepping around a fat...

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BioSport Earbuds with Built-in Heart Monitor

$24.99 from Amazon »

SMS Audio has your back heart. Their BioSport earbuds don't just pump out the vocals, bass, and mid-tones to keep you moving, they also measure your heart rate and track your intensity to keep you moving...harder. Faster!...

Giveaway Closed

Giveaway: Tactile Turn Metal Pen Set

So what if I still scrawl like a 5-year-old, and am so unaccustomed to hand writing stuff anymore that my hand cramps after 3 minutes of holding a pen? I still love them. And steal them from every hotel, restaurant, and...

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The Chateau de Vigny

$5.7 million from Immo Best International »

You know, I've been thinking it's getting to be about time I move out of my mama's house...

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Flaviar Top-Shelf Liquor Tasting Packs

$39.99 from Flaviar »

Is this what Grandma meant when she asked for a nip of whiskey? And then asked again four more times? Flaviar is a private, members-only tasting club that provides its subscribers with regular tasting packs of small-batch...

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Military Grade Rubber Bands

$15.50 from Amazon »

Calling them rubber bands on steroids would be figuratively accurate (and obviously sounds cool), but what Ranger Bands really are are big ol' cut hunks of bicycle tubes*. Thick and strong like my...hands...these military...

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Archtek Toothpaste Tablets

Sold Out from Amazon »

Do you know how often I go to bed without brushing my teeth because I have fallen asleep on the couch, or stumbled home drunk, or am just flat out too lazy to go brush my teeth? Probably at least as often as I do gather...

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Supersized ilumi Smartbulb

$89 from ilumi »

For those out there seeking Magnum-sized mood lighting to go with your Magnum-sized...heart and desire to sweetly romance your lady friend with no expectations or monkey business whatsoever, ilumi has fed its A21 Smartbulb...

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OGIO Ascent Backpack

$99.99 from OGIO »

I think I could collect backpacks like some people collect Rolexes or Lambos. Because I love all of their zippers and pockets and organization of life compartments. And because I'm not some sort of flashy high roller...

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TARDIS Wedding Ring

$1,100 - $3k from Etsy »

Doctor Who's magical, time-traveling police box is pervasive enough in pop culture to have inspired not just one, but two thousand-dollar-plus unique and artisan-crafted diamond rings. Probably more, really, but this...

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Faze Bantam Drone

$39.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Oh boy, another drone to add to what is turning into quite the drone collection around here. This one, the Faze, is a tiny little guy weighing in at just 12.2 grams. But the doesn't mean he doesn't show up fully stocked...

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Periodic Tableware

$18 - $85 from PT Ware »

Periodic Tableware is one reason why people invent new words. Like "mud-licious" and "puddle-wonderful" and, most appropriate to this case, "geektastic." This collection of scientific glassware transformed into vessels...

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The Scrubba Wash Bag

$39.99 from Amazon »

When I see the word "Scrubba" all I can think of is my Uncle Orville. Gettin' all hot and ornery with my cousin Stoobie when we were kids and he refused to take a bath. "You grimy ground crawler," he'd yell, "if you don't...

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Glitch Playing Cards

Sold Out from Amazon »

Glitch: "An electrical pulse of short duration that is usually the result of a fault or design error, particularly in a digital circuit." That's a pretty good way to put it. Thank you, Wikipedia (yes, I donate regularly.)...

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Pointie Tactical Marker

$20 - $25 from indiegogo »

The Pointie. A "tactical marker" in name, but we both know what that's a euphemism for: stabbing things. Like glass during rescues. Warthogs during attacks. And whiteboards. Insolent, misbehavin' whiteboards...