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Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Sand-Free Beach Mat
$27 - $99.95 from Amazon »

I would like it very much if CGear's Sand-Free Multimat stayed sand-free by emitting an invisible dome barrier that repelled...no, forcefully rejected all granular compounds...and children...that got within a foot of it. But I think more...

Wednesday, May 15, 2013
SeaDuction Floating Cabanas

No one complain that SeaDuction's amphibious cabanas are available only at tropical resorts, and not for public purchase, because I know that even if they were up for general grabs, all I would hear is more complaints: "Cool...but not more...

Saturday, February 25, 2012
Planet Earth Globe Fire Pit
$1,679 from Fire Pit Art »

Ahhh, a globe-shaped fire pit whose flaming cutouts are our planet Earth's continents. Just like my grandma always said: the next time the world goes down, it's going down in flames. This sinister piece of social commentary really is perfect for a little apocalypse theme party before the Mayan calendar, the zombies, or the hand of the Lord gets to us all. more...

Wednesday, June 06, 2012
Doctor Who TARDIS Beach Towel
$24.68 from Amazon »

The TARDIS' last launch through the Time Vortex seems to have rendered the vessel two-dimensional. And...terry cloth. But a TARDIS Beach Towel is great news for pool and beach bums in search of the summer's definitive piece of Doctor more...

Saturday, June 23, 2012
Insta-Kilt Towel
$18.99 - $29.95 from Amazon »

I've been wondering would there ever be a way, when I'm extracting sand and the salty ocean from my crevices, or toweling off after a shower, that I could feel as if I'm traipsing through the Scottish Highlands, communing with mossy more...

Saturday, June 16, 2012
Giant Inflatable Beach Ball
$131.65 from Amazon »

In a sweeping display of calling a duck a duck, the makers of this plastic sphere that balloons to 10 feet in diameter when injected with air have named their creation: Giant Inflatable Beach Ball. And truly, when I look at it, ball is the first thought that comes to my mind. Well, balls really. As in, Holy balls, this thing could take out half the kids who'd want to play with it. Never mind having more...

Friday, April 06, 2012
Cremation Ash Fireworks Memorial
$5,500 from Angels Flight »

Out with a bang indeed. Angels Flight's sunset fireworks displays put the memorable in memorial service, commemorating recently-passed loved ones with spectrally brilliant explosives made from their cremated remains. Trained staff load more...

Sunday, September 04, 2011
Crime Scene Beach Towel
$9 from Amazon »

Perfect for a long lazy nap on the beach after a 12 pack of duff beer the night before. It measures a full 30" x 60" and is made of a super absorbent velour. Velour! I've always wanted to drape myself in velour. more...

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