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Blood Pool Pillow

By: on August 27, 2012
$15.66
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Everyone will be glad to know this Blood Pool Pillow comes with a 1-year warranty. Like, in case it evaporates or absorbs into the bedsheets or something, I guess. The deep red velvet casing is stuffed to a 3D level of equal parts comfort and distaste, particularly when used while sneaking in a nap at the office. For dogs, the Blood Pool Pillow is also a good prop to haul in when convincing owners who declare, "I'm going to kill you!" upon returning home to shredded couch cushions, gnawed leather shoes, and an assortment of used feminine products strewn about the living room, that you are already dead.

Pillows are amoebic in shape as shown, and sized approximately 22" x 15.7".

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MonPere Travel Pillow

$71 from MonPere »

MonPere says its new travel pillow, which looks like the arms of a Sesame Street character on a mission to give hugs / snap necks, is "weird for a reason." Apparently, the company's years of testing and prototyping the...

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Flayed Flesh Garters

Sold Out from Etsy »

Take peek-a-boo garters to the next level: peek-a-boo blood vessels and layers of muscle tissue, courtesy of open-wound prostheses and stocking accoutrements from Etsy's Meaghan O'Keefe. A pair of unpainted latex prostheses...

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Saddleback Leather Coffin

When you go, go out in style. Saddleback Leather founder Dave Munson made this Leather Coffin for himself. For his future, departed self. And when he finished it, he liked his full-grain final resting place so much that...

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Sex Positions You Never Thought Possible (NSFW)

$49.98 from Amazon »

Remember that one time you let some chick drag you to hot yoga because she too was hot and you wanted to see her do bendy things in spandex pants, but then you ended up spending the whole class lying on your back trying...

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Philippe the Skeleton Lamp

Phillipe the Skeleton Lamp is not the first skeleton lamp I've met (see Glass Skull Tiki Torch, Day of the Dead Skull Lamp). But he's definitely the first skeleton lamp I've met named "Phillipe." Which leads me to believe...

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Stranger Things Eleven Bleeding Nose Candle

$39.69 from Firebox.com »

This is an Eleven Bleeding Nose Candle. If you've seen stranger things - say, Taxidermy Animal Drones or Edible Anus Chocolates - it probably won't bother you. And if you've seen Stranger Things, you'll probably love it....

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Slumber Cloud Cooling Bedding

$49.99 - $210 from Slumber Cloud »

Somewhere between hot and cold there's a comfy, soft, temperate Slumber Cloud. Based on heat-absorbing / heat-releasing technology originally engineered for NASA astronauts, Slumber Cloud bedding includes a complete line...

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Melting Bloody Hand Candle

$35 from Etsy »

Now here's a bloody handy gift for Halloween. Bryan Lawrence makes these terrifically creepy candles, you guessed it, by hand, using flesh-colored wax for the outer layers of their fingers and palms, and blood-red on...

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Acid Trip Pillow

$28.84 from Amazon »

The actual name of this product is Moonlight Pillow. Really? Has the moon been eating Skittles? Did it swallow a gay pride parade? Because the moon I look at has certainly never gleamed the entire Roy G Biv rainbow. Except...

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Cereal Killer Bowl

$26 from Amazon »

Decimate the Froot Loops, eradicate the Frosted Flakes, eliminate all traces of Trix with the Cereal Killer Bowl. Those Charms may be Lucky before the box is opened, but once once they hit your Dexter-approved bowl, it's...

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Punchable USB-Connected Enter Key Pillow

$14.99 from Amazon »

Need to blow off some stress? Just hit Enter. Hard. This USB-connected Enter Key Pillow redefines what it means to punch a QWERTY key. In the best, best possible way. Hook the oversized, tetromino-style pillow into a...

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Sleep Suit

If the Ostrich Pillow doesn't provide enough coverage and anonymity for your power naps, how about the patent-pending Sleep Suit? Designed by Architect Forrest Jessee as an experimental medium for testing out Buckminster...