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Crustache Crust Cutter

By: on March 23, 2012
$5.93
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Ahhh, here's one for the kids, the kids at heart, and the practicing hipsters. The Crustache Cutter performs a little snip-snip on bread that's boringly shaped like bread to produce hilarious/clever/ironic (depending on which of the above audience it is serving) mustache sandwiches in shapes horseshoe, handlebar, and Stalin. Not since the PB&J wallet has a sandwich both looked so good, and made you look so good. Hey, how about breaking out the mustachioed plastic for a combined theme of finger foods and food faces at your next party?

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The Beard Bro Beard-Shaping Tool

$17.79 from Amazon »

Men, are you tired of spending precious minutes in the morning grooming and edging your perfect specimen of manliness (well, the one on your face anyway) only to end up looking like your 6-year-old shaved you after you...

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Beard Grow XL Facial Hair Supplement

$79.99 from Amazon »

Snake oil? No Way! Beard Grow XL isn't oil at all. It's pills! Ninety little capsules whose daily dose claims to carry the coveted effect of a full and glorious facial bush that's sure to rival the one on Santa himself....

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Whisker Dam Mustache Protector

$20 from Whisker Dam »

They say it's like an umbrella for your face. And also that it's the best dam invention for keeping your whiskers dry. The Whisker Dam sits over a pint of beer (or milk, or triple mocha with extra whipped cream) and prevents...

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Tetris Sandwich Cutter

Sold Out from Amazon »

What can I say about the Tetris sandwich cutter except that it cuts sandwiches into shapes based on the all-time best of all games of all time? UNO can barely crawl out of its little paper carton in the presence of Tetris...

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Breakfast Sandwich Maestro

$23.89 from Amazon »

5 minutes to a breakfast sandwich. No drive-thru on earth can beat that...mainly because of the whole leaving the house and driving to the drive-thru portion of the equation. Otherwise I guess most of them could. If there...

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The Charted Sandwich Board

$29 - $115 from PopChartLab.com »

If she's gonna go make you a sammich, you should probably: A) know exactly what kind of sammich you require to avoid receiving, like, hummus & sprouts on gluten-free millet bread; and B) be fully aware of the sammich's...

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Groomarang Beard Styling & Shaping Template

$14.95 from Amazon »

The Groomarang always returns...to the basics of good shaving and haircare practices. Tangle-free beards and mustaches. Crisp shaves. Clean neck lines. The curved comb serves as a shaving / clipping template for precise...

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Philips Norelco Vaccuum Beard Trimmer

$54.99 from Amazon »

If you don't enjoy cleaning your clippings out of the bathroom sink...and counter, and floor, and crevices behind the toilet, the Philips Norelco Beard Trimmer 7200 gives you an alternative: vacuum them directly off your...

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The Godfather Safety Razor

$36.97 from Amazon »

Treat the Godfather right and he'll lend you a hefty, solid brass and bronze hand, and give you smooth, manly shave with his raw, platinum-coated super blades. Treat the Godfather wrong and...he'll cut you....

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PornBurger: Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes

$14.27 from Amazon »

A picture of a Porn Burger is worth a thousand drools. Maybe even a lick. A bite. At the very least a boner. In Porn Burger: Hot Buns and Juicy Beefcakes, self-described "burger pervert" Matthew Ramsey indulges us with...

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A Super Upsetting Cookbook About Sandwiches

$15.63 from Amazon »

A Super Upsetting Cookbook About Sandwiches is kind of like PornBurger meets a neurotic New York chef. Tyler Kord owns and operates NYC's No. 7 restaurant and No. 7 Sub shops. His sandwiches look delicious. His mind looks...

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Pepo Watermelon Slicer

$11 from Amazon »

Avihai Shurin has done it again!...