Kitchen

ChefWave Milkmade Non-Dairy Milk Maker

$199.95 Amazon »

Milk, it does the body good, and it doesn't even have to come from a cow, a goat, an elephant, or a lady's boobie. It could come from the ChefWave Milkmade Non-Dairy Milk Maker. The automatic milker uses your favorite...

Wild Dining Dinner Plates

$22.99 - $39.99 Amazon »

I mean, I don't see Ali Larter in a whipped cream bikini anywhere, so dining can't be that wild with Mustard's Wild Dining Dinner Plates. But I guess drawing a ketchup mustache on a silverback gorilla, and giving the...

#1 Dish Washer Foam Finger Kitchen Sponge

$7 Amazon »

Hey, sports fans, are you and your team ready to clean house? Yeah? Yeah?!!! Then start with the dishes. Here, have a #1 Dish Washer foam finger kitchen sponge to rub in the faces of all grease, dried spaghetti sauce...

The Kiss Teacup & Saucer

$125 Etsy »

I wouldn't normally appreciate a schmoopy design like The Kiss Teacup & Saucer, but Mila Arkhipovat's kissy-face couple brings as much creativity and refinement to the table as they do schmoopiness...

ButterPOP No-Mess Butter Stick Holder & Dish

$11.95 Etsy »

Wait, ButterPOP, is it now socially acceptable to eat butter on a stick? Licking down the sides and round the top like a popsicle or a lollipop? Ohboyohboyoh...no? That's not what the ButterPOP is? OK, well...wait. Don't...

Brizzle Stand-Up Scoop, Baste & Drizzle Brush

$11.95 Amazon »

Do I want a silicone bristled basting brush that can also scoop up juicy drippin's, drizzle them onto my dish, and then rest on my cutting board without spreading their remnants all over it? Fo shizzle my Brizzle...

Uranium Glass Juicer

$28 Etsy »

Wait, wait, let me just juice a squeeze of lemon...with a uranium twist for that cocktail. No? What, you prefer lime?...

Dalstrong Shadow Black Series Kitchen Knives

$69.99 - $299.99 Amazon »

As if kitchen knives weren't intimidating enough on their own*, Dalstrong created their Shadow Black Series of kitchen knives. So now I can pair what they call a "menacing design" with the high probability that I will...

Garrnish Pesticide Purifier

$199 - $299 Garrnish »

Electrolysis. First it saves you from unwanted body hair, and now with the Garrnish Pesticide Purifier, it's gonna save you from unwanted pesticides coating your fruits and vegetables!...

Nana Hats Banana Preservers

$9.99 - $12.99 Amazon »

Nana Hats, a 2-piece combo of a silicone condom and a crocheted animal or other cutesy item cover, call themselves banana preservers. I call them another banana invention that's, yep, say it with me, bananas...

Mason Jar Flip Cap Lid with Handle

$9.95 Amazon »

A mason jar flip cap lid. Dude, I know. I don't want that as much as an eleMMent Palazzo Land Yacht, or even a Pool Punisher inflatable tank. Though did you see this mason jar flip cap lid also comes with a handle? Anyway...

Lodge Wildlife Series Cast Iron Skillets

$13.75 - $68 Amazon »

Moose and turkeys and bears, oh...yum. And you don't even have to eat them to think so, my plant-based dudes. Lodge's Wildlife Series of cast iron skillets honor some of "America's most distinctive animals" not by cooking...

Maiullari Cooking Box - Kitchen in a Box

The Maiullari Cooking Box: A Kitchen Solution for...Nomads? The Giovanni Pesce design is clever, I guess, but it seems like even the smallest and most efficient of apartments and homes are equipped with a kitchen. And...

Whirley-Pop Color-Changing Popcorn Popper

Sold Out Amazon »

Three minutes and a dedicated cranking arm are all the Whirley-Pop Popcorn Popper needs to make a fresh 'n' fluffy batch of popped kernels ready for the couch and the next episodes of Ted Lasso (for me) and Physical (for...

Dash Mini Skull Waffle Maker

$17.99 Amazon »

I always thought the brains were the tastiest part of the human head, but Dash's Mini Skull Waffle Maker has me reconsidering. I'd definitely eat that cranium...

Toshiba Low Carb Rice Cooker

$172.82 Amazon »

Nope, the Toshiba Low Carb Rice Cooker isn't a rice cooker for low carb rice. It's even more unbelievable than that: a rice cooker that cooks normal rice into low carb rice. Impossible! you say. (Well, that's what I said...

Fresco Chef Hat - Keep Your Baked Goods Fresh

$15 Fresco »

The Fresco Chef Hat doesn't bake the goods, it keeps the already baked goods fresh, so the last of your dozen cupcakes from the local bakery will taste just as moist and delicious as your first, even if you're eating...

Flagship Light - Turn a Skillet Into a Cast Iron Grill

$49 - $59 Kickstarter »

Flagship Light is a cast iron plate that fits inside any 10" to 12" skillet you already own. According to Flagship designers, it turns the skillet into a legit cast iron grilling surface you can use to replicate the dry...

3D Skull Silicone Cake Mold

$14.29 Amazon »

I could call this 3D Skull Silicone Cake Mold a Life-Size or 1:1 Scale 3D Skull Silicone Cake Mold, because even if it doesn't unmold the size of your skull or my skull right now, it was the size of our skulls at some...

Dip Sea Oil & Vinegar Dipping Dish

Now is that a whale or a shark you're supposed to fill with vinegar in the Dip Sea Oil & Vinegar Dipping Dish? Or soy sauce, I guess, if you choose to use the dish for your sushi accompaniments, but regardless of whether...

Silipint Unbreakable Silicone Bowls

$28.95 - $49.95 Amazon »

Silipint! Trix are for kids! Buuut, I guess you and all your unbreakable tie-dyed silicone bowl-ness can hold on to the Trix so any mishap the kids have while eating them won't result in shattered glass or ceramic on...

Wooden Knife for Kids

$15.58 Etsy »

OK, Wooden Knife for Kids, I'll grant your solid oak "blade" is safe for the kiddos to cut with in the kitchen. And I'll also grant that your skills at slicing a banana, as well as Play-Doh, another of your recommended...

Belgian Balance Siphon Coffee Maker

$146 Amazon »

Whether you're a coffee connoisseur or just a fan of low-tech gadgets, this Belgian balance siphon coffee maker is going to add some panache along with a caffeinated jolt to your kitchen...

ChickenStone - Roast a Whole Bird in Half the Time

Um. Are you sure, ChickenStone, you wouldn't rather be called CockStone? I mean, I know I'm immature and all, but what human person could consider the ChickenStone's function - to roast a whole bird 50% faster than normal...