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Yank Me Candles

By: on November 27, 2016
$19.95
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Yank Me Candles are terrific gag or white elephant gifts in the vein of WTF Prank Candles, but with a different kind of blood pulsing through them. The latter have delightful sounding names, such as Apple Pie, on the outside, but after 3 or 4 hours of burn time start emitting foul, rancid smells, such as Dirty Farts, for the next 8 to 10. Yank Me Candles flip the joke, going for the shock value in name, but rewarding the recipient who dares burn a Dirty Sanchez or Old Man's Balls with lovely scents of Berry Berry Strawberry and Lavendar.

Yank Me Candles are made of 100% soy, and come printed in a dozen plus funny, awful, and offensive labels. Dutch Oven. Mud Butt. Grandma's Fart. The festive Merry Merry Dingleberry. All include a foul smelling disc attached to the inside of their lid for that initial whiff and Gah-arrrgh-blechhh! reaction. But once the disc is removed the candle will burn only its sweet scent, with all remnants of the nasal affront eliminated.

Well, except that nifty label of the brown mustachioed girl.

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The Dadbag Beer Belly Fanny Pack

By: Dadbag »

The Dadbag beer belly fanny pack is right up there with the Sexy Chest Swimsuit in its ability to create a fiesta of discomfort, with a few streamers of sick fascination, before my eyes. The Baby Head Masks used to do...

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Flowering Penis Coffee Mug

$15.99 from Amazon »

For all the ladies (and fellas!) who count floral patterns and penises amongst their favorite things, have I got a mug of a gift for you. Clothing and accessory brand HUMAN goes for a very anatomical part of being one...

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Breaking Bad RV Incense Burner

$29.99 from ThinkGeek »

Ah, the Breaking Bad RV Incense Burner. [Cue nostalgia.] Reminds me just how much I miss the Krystal Ship. I can't believe it's been 4 years since Heisenberg & Pinkman cooked their last batch. I hope things turn out better...

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Embarrassing Box Prank Mailer (NSFW)

$14.99 from Amazon »

D*ck in a Box is back! Just in time to dil-dole out some good times at the office and an April Fool's Day gift or two. Like many popular send-it-anonymously pranks, maker Witty Yeti will take a sworn oath to mail your...

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The Killer Key

$12 from Amazon »

The Killer Key is for law enforcement officials, landlords with squatters or evicted tenants, and pranksters who thrive on taking things one step too far. See, the key blade inserts into any Kwikset or Schlage brand lock...

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Punch in the Nuts Snack Mix

Sold Out from Amazon »

Mmmmm, nothing hits the spot like a Punch in the Nuts. This Punch in the Nuts Snack Mix listing includes 6 nut-punching bags filled with cashews, peanuts, chocolate bits, and raisins. Get ready to whack your taste buds...

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PC Prankster

$9.47 from Amazon »

I live for shenanigans of the PC Prankster variety. No, not because I'm devious and mean-spirited, because I have great empathy for others. I know as well as anyone how it feels to reach a level of frustration with a...

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Fresh Wave Odor Removing Crystal Gel

$11.99 from Amazon »

My mama gave me a jar of this Fresh Wave Odor Removing Crystal Gel, I guess because she thinks my house stinks. Hey, it's not me, it's the cat. And maybe She-Ra: Princess of Power. I smell like sugar and pumpkin spice...

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The TAC-SAC Rail Accessory

$39.99 from Tac Sac »

Last time me and my friend Cornelius played paintball he kept getting nailed and hiding and whining like a little goat until finally everyone was like, Dude, you need to grow a pair! And he was all, Dude! It's not me...

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The Eviltron

Sold Out from Amazon »

Combining the ethos that nothing is scarier than one's own imagination with the ethos that creeping someone out to the cusp of a complete mental breakdown is great fun, we have...The Eviltron. That strange scratching...

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Willy Care Kit

$17.85 from Amazon »

If your name isn't William, and you don't need a gift for a dude named William, I can't imagine why you'd buy a Willy Care grooming kit. I mean, I know it's a common name and all, but are there really enough Willies out...

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Voice & Motion Activated Prank Stickers

$12.99 from Amazon »

More sticker fun for the office and airport pranksters. A 50-pack of Voice & Motion Activated prank stickers, my college friends, seem like a necessary addition to your suitcase when you head back to the dorm too....