It used to be that if you wanted to give a kid a gift all you had to do was find a big stick in the back yard, wrap it up, and tell the wide-eyed tyke it was a sword. Now though, kids don't want simple gifts that hone their imaginations and save me from spending more than $5, kids want the latest smartphone and the biggest TV and the camera with the most megapixels and sneakers made of gold. Kids want the same gifts I want! And what do they give me in return? A crappy drawing they made of Batman with "Thanks" written in disproportionately-sized block letters, or their stupid handprint in plaster of Paris. Well kids, here's a whole digital encyclopedia of gifts you and I both want, but that I guarantee only you will end up getting.