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Rollie Egg Dog Maker

Posted: March 19, 2013
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Something about the cylindrical results of the Rollie Eggmaster cooking system makes me a little uncomfortable. Is it that the tube of eggs looks too artificial? Too space agey? Too science projecty? Too anal probey? I can't quite put my finger on it, but good thing my love of hen embryos and food on a stick overshadows this tinge of disquietude and has no real effect on my willingness...nay, eagerness...to munch on a Rollie dog.

If Rollie's tricky manipulation of egg geometry isn't enough of a selling point for you, take a look at the gadget's vertical cooking technology, which casts aside the pans and stoves and resultant messes historically associated with egg preparation practices. A non-stick interior cooking surface even eliminates the need for butter or oil additives. Bacon additives, however, are still encouraged. Cheese, mushrooms, peppers, and Doritos too. The Rollie accepts all omelet fixins on the input, works a few minutes of magic, and then literally births what can perhaps best be described as a skewered bundle of ovo-joy. Every single one of the egg dogs, egg rolls, egg pops--so many eponymous possibilities!--emerges perfect and beautiful. Which is a helluva lot more than I can say about 95% of babies.

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