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Fizzics Beer System - Draft Taste from a Can

By: on January 21, 2016
$169.99
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The Fizzics Beer System promises fresh draft taste from any store-bought can or bottle. On boy, I can hardly wait to find out what it's going to do to my already precious BLLs. According to its makers, "The Fizzics System is built to stimulate all 5 of your senses to deliver a sublime beer experience and sensory fusion." Whoa, I hope the beer you like to drink lives up to those expectations as I'm sure mine will. Fizzics accomplishes its cinco sense celebration pretty simply: place any can, bottle, or growler (up to 64 ounces) in the unit, insert the long tube, and close the lid. Your beer pours through a tap handle just like it would at the bar and, if Fizzics has its physics right, emerges with a perfectly foamy head, aromatic bouquet, enhanced mouthfeel, and dreamy visuals.

Fizzics uses patent-pending fluid and gas technology to enhance beer, and requires no separate CO2 or Nitro canisters to achieve its perfect pours. The company says any style of beer, from lagers to Hefs to stouts, is a worthy subject for the Fizzics System, and the machine does not discriminate between expensive and cheap buys. Ahhh, I see one more joyous addition to my Super Bowl 50 party in my future.

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The BevBuckle - Retractable Drink Holder Belt Buckle

$24.95 - $34.95 from BevBuckle »

The BevBuckle is business in the front...wait...nah. It's a chunky metal belt buckle with your choice of anything from a longhorn to a largemouth bass on it that flips down to form a perfectly sized, perfectly stable...

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Beer Savers - Silicone Rubber Bottle Caps

$8.03 from Amazon »

I know, I know, Who so put out to finish a measly bottle of beer they need to Beer Saver it for later? Well, the freshness-preserving caps do work on 22 ounce beers too....

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CigarzUp Beer Bottle Cigar Holder

$11.99 from Amazon »

A beer in one hand, a cigar in...the same hand. CigarzUp, yep, keeps your cigar up, and at the ready, when you're enjoying a smoke alongside a bottled cold one....

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Chill-O-Matic Automatic Drink Chiller

$25 from Amazon »

The Chill-O-Matic is for when your friend Cornelius takes the last sodie from the fridge and doesn't. Put. More. In! Cornelius, you jackass! It's like, it's like...what's that, Sugar Lips? Huh. She-Ra: Princess of Power...

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Dual Beer Glass

$35 from Etsy »

At first I thought the Dual Beer Glass was intended for sampling two different types of beers at once, and I was like, How the dickens am I supposed to keep one from spilling all over my crotch when I'm drinking the other?...

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Liquor Log Booze Dispenser

$119 from Amazon »

Now this is the kind of Yule Log I'm talking about. How better to bring good tidings to you and all of your kin than with a nice bottle of Jameson or Jack chug-a-lugging out the tap on an urban harvested Ohio hardwood...

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The Knockout Beer/Water/Gravity Bong

$40 from The Knockout »

I used to prefer my knockouts served as Fireball shots and right hooks, but this Knockout, a new twist on the beer bong, might leave those standards unconscious and bleeding from the ear on the floor. Designed for attachment...

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Snake Venom - World's (New) Strongest Beer

$78 from Firebox.com »

At this time last year, the World's Strongest Beer was Armageddon, a 330 mL bottle of malt, hops, a little sweetness, and an awesome 65% ABV crafted by Scottish brewery Brewmeister. This year, the World's New Strongest...

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HOPii Personal Micro-Brewery

$399 - $599 from HOPii »

HOPii on one foot and do a little jig, beer lovers. This little micro-brewery is coming to ferment your favorite craft beers right from your kitchen countertop. HOPii is your personal brewmaster. Really, the machine is...

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Beer Tree Gravity-Fed Home Brewer

Are normal home brewing kits typically boring and ugly? I don't really know, as I focus more on drinking beer than making beer (best to funnel all of your energy into a single channel and dominate it!) but whatever normal...

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Biersafe Underground Beer Cooler

$67 - $117 from Biersafe »

The Biersafe Underground Beer Cooler is a smaller, simpler, and much cheaper version of a design I first saw in the eCool cooler. The Biersafe removes some of the nifty engineering of the eCool - like, instead of using...

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Stanley Stein Hockey Beer Mug

$58.50 from Amazon »

I don't always watch hockey, but when I do...I prefer to do it drunk of my ass so I find it more entertaining. This beer mug incarnation of the Stanley Cup looks like a great way to achieve drunk off my ass with a quickness....