Eggplant Sauce Bottle
Sure, you can call this condiment conveyor an "Eggplant Sauce Bottle," but we all know the anatomical emoji brought to culinary life is really only suitable for mayo. At least if you're to provide the most fun, funny, and OMG gross spectacle with it during use.
A close second for the squeezable eggplant might be yellow mustard, and an impersonation (impenisation?) of your friend Cornelius dropping trou on a bratwurst when he's hungover and severely dehydrated after a night of mix 'n' match shotskis.
The third condiment you could fill the Eggplant Sauce Bottle with is ketchup, but that's just mean. Ask Mike Birbiglia.