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Benny the Jumping Bull Inflatable Hopper

By: on February 16, 2017
$24.95 - $29.99
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Dude! Where was Benny the Jumping Bull and his sick Zorro mask when I was a kid in need of a sidekick (and means of transportation!) for acting out my superhero fantasies? And look. That little girl in the photo isn't even wearing a cape or holding a shield while she's riding him. All the best inventions are wasted on today's youth! Wasted!

Benny the Jumping Bull comes with a hand pump his breeders say will take him from two-dimensional to bouncy, bouncy in about 5 minutes. The hoppers are made of thick, safety-tested rubber approved for repeated journeys up and down the driveway, and across the backyard. In addition to being the funnest thing ever, kids will find Benny helps train their balance and coordination, and also gives them quite the bullish workout.

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Air Fort - 30-Second Inflatable Tent

$54.99 from Amazon »

The Air Fort, in addition to creating a private place for me to hide sleep when my future in-laws visit and take over my bedroom next month, gives me an excuse to haul out my old college box fan. The one She-Ra: Princess...

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Clear Bottom Inflatable Raft

$35.69 from Amazon »

Kids, Clear Bottom Rafts & Cartilaginous Creatures: it's a Shark Week Special - don't miss it!...

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Dark Ride - Theme Park Cologne

$64 from Xyrena »

In explaining the motivation behind their Dark Ride, a cologne they describe as a scented mashup of Pirates of the Caribbean, Jurassic Park, Splash Mountain, and all of your favorite theme park water rides, fragrance...

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Bird of Prey Bicycle

$4,200 from Bird of Prey »

I didn't think the foam helmets and seizure-inducing neon spandex could look any more ridiculous rolling down the road, yelling at cars to get out of their lane, and then cutting into traffic at will when it suits them...

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Intex Ultra Daybed Inflatable Lounge

$45.17 from Amazon »

I like it. Intex hasn't just made their daybed an indoor / outdoor lounger, they've made it a dry land / chillin' on the water piece of inflatable relaxation too. The big ol' disc can fit 2 comfortably and more than 2...

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Skoda Man-Pram

By: Skoda »

At the end of the day, you'll still be a dude pushing around a baby...or a pomeranian...in a stroller, but at least with Skoda's Man-Pram you can mow the fuck over anyone who gives you shit about it....

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Inflat-A-Bull Pool Toy

$48.88 from Amazon »

Save a horse, ride a pool toy. The Inflat-A-Bull might be the most clever--and scariest; check out the photo-realistic print on that toro's face!--pool toy I've ever seen. And he's here to buck you right into summer 2017....

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Adult Hippity Hop Animal Balls

$49.99 - $59.98 from Amazon »

If my girlfriend agreed to Hippity Hop down the aisle on an Anna the Magical Unicorn Ball I might agree to propose to her. Haha, yeah you're right. No I wouldn't. That was a bad example. How about: if my co-workers agreed...

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Kingii Flotation Wristband

$89.99 from Amazon »

Even strong swimmers get tired. And if you doggie paddle into an unexpected current, or get separated from your waterfaring vessel, life jacket or not you may have some trouble getting yourself back to shore. Tom Agapiades...

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Lay-Z-Spa Miami 4-Person Inflatable Hot Tub

$335.38 from Amazon »

It's winter, it's dark, football's almost over, I think it's time for a hot tub. To soak away my sorrows and boredom. And maybe deliver a little muscle therapy to that bit of my back I tweaked trying to grab my razor...

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Sumo Tube Wearable Inflatable Towable

$115.85 from Amazon »

I know. Way too much alliteration for a Wednesday afternoon. To break things up, and appease the boatless, I'll add that the Sumo Wearable Inflatable Towable is also a Wearable Inflatable Surf Suit. And it looks awwwwwwesommmmme!...

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Self-Installing Car Seat

$499.99 from Amazon »

The 4moms self-installing car seat may not be the most sparkly, fun, or pampering gift for new moms to unwrap this holiday season, but it could prove to be the greatest they've ever received. Paired with its watchdog...