Nobody Likes a Cockblock
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Are you a parent? Then I'm sure you'll agree your precious children have taught you at least as much, and most likely far more, than you've ever taught them. Such as deep, unconditional love. Patience. Awe and wonder. Appreciation for the little things. And how to go very...very long periods of time without sex. Unfortunately, No One Likes a Cockblock won't teach you to teach them how to go to sleep and not have a nightmare or a milk craving or a wet bed when you and Mommy want to boink. But it will be a commiserating friend when you're in a low, sexually frustrated, Buddy! Buddy close the door! Daddy's having alone time in the shower! place.
Nobody Likes a Cockblock is for parents with kids of all cockblocking ages: infanthood, when the baby monitor starts screaming the moment you get naked; toddlerdom, when the kiddo craps his pants and screams loud enough you don't need a baby monitor to hear it the moment you convince your wife her headache isn't that bad; and kindergartenage, when Junior thinks the point of a closed door is to open it, and a locked door to bang on it, right as your dry spell was about to get nice and wet. The naughty rhymes of this Everyparent story come courtesy of R. Swanson, and the even naughtier illustrations of lovable animals in various stages of hump-a-lumping from Jess Jansen.