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World's Smallest Stretch Armstrong

By: on March 25, 2017
$5.99
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He's a grower, not a shower. At 4" tall, this miniature Stretch Armstrong says he has a license to call himself the World's Smallest. At least until you yank his arms and legs to 2...3...4 times their starting size. Just look at Li'l Stretch go.

If you're more into skill than size, Mini Me Stretch Armstrong also down (and under, around, and through) to bend and contort into your favorite desktop display shape.

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National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Village

$17.99 - $129.99 from Amazon »

You can go all out Clark Griswold and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation on your holiday decorating this year without risking falling off the roof or running up a thousand-dollar electrical bill. Just make yourself...

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Wobbling Willy - Your Face on a Dildo (NSFW)

Dudes, check out the Wobbling Willy's practical application for all those selfies you've been taking. Your face on a dildo. A way, way sexier (and more functional!) gift for your girlfriend than that framed dick pic you...

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KFC Internet Escape Pod

$10k from KFC Ltd. »

KFC says their Internet Escape Pod, featuring a fried chicken drumstick door handle and Stretch Armstrong Colonel Sanders passed out drunk and slung over the top, is meant to help you hide from the barrage of Cyber Monday...

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A Christmas Story Village

$12.74 - $98.90 from Amazon »

The Christmas Story Village collection shrinks snapshots of the highs and lows of Ralphie Parker and his family's life so that this holiday season, you can bring them a little closer to your own. From Ralphie's bunny...

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Muscle Suits

$735 - $3,499 from Flex Design Costumes »

The body builders at Flex Design Costumes might be the only body builders on earth who can guarantee they'll jack up, carve out, and rip your muscles to shreds with absolutely no effort on your part beyond telling them...

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Kobayashi Mug

Sold Out from Amazon »

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that...he's gone....

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Bullet 02 - World's Smallest LED Flashlight

$9.99 from Amazon »

Let's not split hairs over whether or not the Bullet 02 is really the World's Smallest LED Flashlight, when we could have a much more insightful discussion about how the barely-an-inch-long illuminator is waterproof...

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Life-Size Exorcist Regan Doll

$3,995 from Etsy »

The only thing worse than a Monday is clicking on a link that brings you to a life-size replica doll of possessed Regan from The Exorcist. It just happened to me, and since misery loves company, here you go, dudes. I'm...

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Deadpool Christmas Tree Ornaments

$30.19 from Amazon »

These Deadpool Christmas tree ornaments will look right at home dangling alongside the Bob Ross Funko Pop figure classing up my mantle. 'Tis the season for happy little trees and Deadpool 2 trailers....

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The Emojibator (NSFW)

$29 from Emojibator »

"If you can't find a date, emojibate." Some of you will chuckle and others will cringe, but Emojibator creator Jaime Jandler feels all she did was bring an obvious joke to life. And good for her. A little elbow grease...

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Stranger Things Eleven Bleeding Nose Candle

$39.69 from Firebox.com »

This is an Eleven Bleeding Nose Candle. If you've seen stranger things - say, Taxidermy Animal Drones or Edible Anus Chocolates - it probably won't bother you. And if you've seen Stranger Things, you'll probably love it....

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Stranger Fillings: A Parody Cookbook

$14.19 from Amazon »

Stranger Fillings: A Parody Cookbook continues the cookbook trend started by recipe collections like Baking Bad and The Snacking Dead. Released during the lead-up to Stranger Things' second season, the spoof provides...