TEEF! - Drinkable Dog Dental Health

$28 - $285 TEEF! »

I know. TEEF!'s idea of dumping dissolvable powder in your dog's water to clean his teeth is inherently off-putting. Not only because there seems to be enough random shit in our water supply these days, but also because...

Absurd Scientific Advice for Common Real-World Problems

$8.38 Amazon »

How To: Absurd Scientific Advice for Common Real-World Problems is the latest satirical (but also funny-'cause-it's-true) release from webcomic xkcd cartoonist and author Randall Munroe...

Coca-Cola Hot Dog Steamer & Bun Warmer

$82.49 Amazon »

Hot diggity-dog, with a Coca-Cola on the side. Though you'll have to buy the sodie separately, the Coca-Cola Hot Dog Steamer & Bun Warmer more than makes up for what it lacks in Coke reservoirs with a giant lower tray...

Human True Wireless Over-Ear Headphones

$259 - $399 HUMAN »

Human's true wireless over-ear headphones are kinda funny lookin'. Like high-tech panda bear ears. But I thought Bluetooth earpieces, and then bone conduction headphones, and then AirPods were funny lookin' when they...

iRobot Braava Jet Mopping Robot

Sold Out Amazon »

I would much rather vacuum a floor than mop it, so the iRobot Braava Jet Mopping Robot is a welcome addition to my closet o' crap that helps me get chores done. What I wonder, though, is if you have carpeted floors abutting...

Hypelev Levitating Sneaker Display Stand

$249 Hypelev »

The Hypelev sneaker stand enables anyone - even you - to defy gravity with a pair of Air Jordans just like Michael. The only catch: you can't be wearing them...

TAXA Mantis Camper

The last time I doled out the kind of TAXA people actually want to pay for, it was in mighty mite form. The TAXA TigerMoth Trailer is a small, lightweight camper intended for towing by 4-cylinder vehicles. TAXA's latest...

Aphrodite Salt & Pepper Set

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Aphrodite Salt & Pepper Set? More like Medusa's twin cousins, the Meboobsa sisters...

Udon for Sleeping Noodles Blanket

Who don wack out my udon? Welp, guess if I can't stuff it in my face, the next best option would be to entwine my limbs in it and cuddle up for a good night's sleep...

Langogo Pocket AI Translator with Global WiFi Hotspot

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Langogo is a handheld instant two-way translator for travels and Tinder dates where you know you're going to hit a language and communication barrier*. Langogo provides translation across 105 languages, including against...

Carpe Antiperspirant Hand, Foot, Boob & Pit Lotions

$14.95 - $19.99 Amazon »

Oh boy, here comes the sweater! Better have a towel nearby if you're gonna shake his hand. And don't sit too close to him at lunch. And if lunch involves anything 1-star spicy or higher, say you're not hungry and just...

RSVLTS Saved By The Bell Collection Clothing

$27 - $65 RSVLTS »

Did you know Saved By the Bell shares a 30th anniversary with Seinfeld? And a 25th anniversary with Friends? Zack Morris, AC Slater, Kelly Kapowski, Jessie Spano, Lisa Turtle, Screech Powers, and Mr. Belding made their...

None of the animals that made my cute but cantankerous animal gift list are dogs, but I think we can still talk in terms of bark versus bite when discussing just how ill-tempered and aggressive these selections are...

Bugatti Centodieci

$8.9 million Bugatti »

Hype for Bugatti's latest hyper car is out: the Bugatti Centodieci is a take on and homage to the French auto maker's EB110 super sports car, itself made in the 90s in honor of Ettore Bugatti's 110th birthday. The EB110...

Harow Arnold Schwarzenegger Iconic Stool

Arnold Schwarzenegger goes from being back to being butt in this (admit it, fantastic) stool for yours from French design studio Harow. Now you can breathe some fresh air with Doug Quaid, and have story time with Mr...

Love Hulten FC - PVM Gaming System

Love Hulten. It's a clever name right? Because whether you're an old school gamer who actually remembers the time when Sony Trinitron PVM-9042QM monitors and Japanese Famicom consoles were hot products in the marketplace...

Hot Seat Card Game: The Party Game About Your Friends

$19.82 Amazon »

As summer draws to a close, the Hot Seat Card Game reminds me I better to start thinking about what I'm going to do when the days of being stuck inside strike. Per my wife, that means besides eat and drink heavily, and...

LANMODO Car Night Vision Camera

$499 - $599 Amazon »

LANMODO's isn't your mama's - or rather, your average paranoid driver's - dash cam. Rather than recording your commutes and road trips to protect you from blame for an accident, the LANMODO Car Night Vision Camera expands...

E2: What Is This Thing?

$12.74 Amazon »

Welcome to the second edition of What Is This Thing?, a photographic feature of a product whose purpose isn't obvious at first glance. Maybe not even second, third, or thirtieth glance. It's a mystery I invite you to...

Egguins - Cook, Store & Serve Egg Holder

$19.90 Amazon »

Squee! your hearts out for the Egguins, ladies and kiddos...and dudes who are being honest. Peleg Design's egg holder uses the arms of penguins to cradle your delicate shells as their own bellies - so precious! - and...

Spyderco Roadie 2" Folding Knife

$67.50 Amazon »

Spyderco's Roadie folding knife is the product of best laid plans foiled. Foiled by the TSA. In 2013, a decade-plus after 9/11, the TSA tossed around a plan to change US security regulations and allow some types of knives...

Portable Air Compressor Tire Inflator

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I just bought this Portable Air Compressor Tire Inflator, and will update when I test it out, but what prompted this purchase was my local gas station charging me $1.50 for mother f**king air. And not just $1.50, $1.50...

Tick Key for Tick Removal

$19.99 Amazon »

The Tick Key is just fine, but the Tick Key in action - blech! Talk about things that make you go ewww...

Fitzke Bugbite Modern Classic Race Boat

Kevin Fitzke the boatbuilder has gone from Bootlegger to Bugbite, and despite the latter sounding smaller and less grand than the former, the opposite is true. A couple years ago we saw the Fitzke Bootlegger Paddleboard...