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Dust Mop Slippers

By: on October 12, 2011
  • Dust Mop Slippers
  • Dust Mop Slippers
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No, gentlemen, October is not too early to start thinking about Christmas gifts for your wife. And the great thing about these slippers is that they look just like real mops, which ensures that when you wear them to collect the morning paper, everyone will praise your multi-tasking genius...

...instead of pitying your misguided fashion sense. Parents take note: 10 out of 10 kids report an increase in popularity when dropped off at school in dust mop slippers.

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Largemouth Bass Slippers

$15.99 - $22.69 from Amazon »

Good news, pescatarians! They've finally started making slippers out of fish - check out these largemouth bass slippers! - so you'll have something to wear while everyone else dons their bunnies, piggies, chickies, and...

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Rocket Air Blaster

$11.16 from Amazon »

At first I was excited about the Rocket Air Blaster because I thought it was an updated version of the Stomp Rocket. Or maybe a handheld Stomp Rocket that shot its red lipstick right into my friend Cornelius' earhole...

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OXO Good Grips Electronics Cleaning Brush

$4.99 from Amazon »

Help me, help me, it's the 2-Headed Monster! That's what dirt and dust will be saying when they see the OXO Good Grips Electronics Cleaning Brush coming for them. This double-sided cleaning tool tidies up phones, computers...

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FoldiMate Robotic Laundry Folder

$700 - $850 from FoldiMate »

Really? Really?! Am I so lazy that I'm willing to spend $800 on a machine that will fold my laundry? Pssshhh! I don't think so....

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GrillFloss BBQ Grill Cleaning Tool

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If I can't even be bothered to floss my own teeth how likely is it I'm going to floss my grill? This GrillFloss tool better be reeeeal easy and un-bothersome to use....

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Electrostatic-Generating Silicone Broom

$36.99 from Amazon »

Give it up for silicone injection technology! The ElectroSilk Electrostatic-Generating Silicone Broom applies everyone's favorite implant and athletic wedding ring compound into everyone's least favorite household cleaning...

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Eruption Disruption Volcano Microwave Cleaner

$19.99 from Amazon »

You could spend 30 minutes placating your erupting mama by scrubbing out the microwave with dish soap and steel wool after you accidentally think it takes 5 minutes to melt butter, and reheat her homemade marinara sauce...

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Brush Hero Water-Powered Detail Brush

$29.99 from Amazon »

You can Brush Hero your car tires, you can Brush Hero your bike tires. You can Brush Hero your headlights and all the bits under your hood. You can Brush Hero your dirty grills and your dirty flower pots and your dirty...

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BAAM! Drain Blaster Cleaner

$21.32 from Amazon »

No, this is not the kind of BAAM! that spices up your sink drain or toilet bowl. On the contrary, it's the kind of BAAM! you call in when you've already spiced up your sink drain or toilet bowl and need help, uh, unspicing...

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GoodFoot Temperature-Balancing Slippers

$65 from Unikia »

Not that it's not incredibly sexy when you caress the lady with whom you're entwined on the couch with a ripe and sweaty foot that makes her gag and recoil, or an ice block of a set of toes that makes her yelp and shoot...

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Talking Chewbacca Slippers

$29.99 from ThinkGeek »

Now Wookiee here, feet! I need to you pipe down for a second! This is a sneak attack on the glazed pumpkin old fashioneds while She-Ra: Princess of Power is in the bathroom. It's cool, though. It's a baker's dozen. Her...

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Bambooee Reusable & Washable Paper Towels

$11.59 from Amazon »

Let me clarify: Bambooees are not at all paper towels, they're bamboo towels. I just named them "Reusable & Washable Paper Towels" because that's how they act. Absorbing crap, cleaning crap, dusting crap, shining crap....