ManHands Soap

By: on February 26, 2013
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When I was in college I worked in food service for 5 years, during which time I smoked a lot of weed and touched a lot of nasty shit. Like I regularly had to stick my hand down garbage disposals clogged with half-eaten pancakes and Denver omelettes and milkshakes and baby vomit and toothpicks. The weed made the job palatable, and even today, now that I'm an upstanding citizen contributing great things to society and steering clear of the MJ, the smell of it still brings back memories and assuages my disgust for humanity's eating habits. Needless to say, when I got a whiff of Adam Anderson's Cannabis-scented ManHands soap, I felt a nostalgia too great for words. Nowadays the grossest things I touch are public bathroom door handles (only when I forget to grab a paper towel on the way out) and the occasional child that plows into me because its negligent parents suck at minding it, but it's still a great relief to know that when my hands are sullied, I have ManHands soap not only to cleanse them, but to leave them smelling like weed. Or one of 23 other decidedly masculine fragrances reminiscent of a man's happiest times and places.

ManHands soaps, which Anderson makes in 3 oz. bars from natural ingredients "tested on dudes, not animals", also come in:

  • Cash
  • Baseball Glove
  • Urinal Mint
  • Top Soil
  • Cedar Log Cabin
  • Democrat
  • Republican
  • Orange Cleaner
  • Buttered Popcorn
  • Beer
  • Bacon
  • Brewed Coffee
  • Christmas Pine
  • Fresh Cut Grass
  • Mint Blend Chewing Tobacco
  • Race Day
  • Obsession
  • Red Wine
  • Margarita
  • Muscle Rub

That's a pretty comprehensive selection for men. And women who wish they were men. And, for that matter, a couple of technical males I've encountered over the past several months who could stand learning how to be men. No better place to start than smelling like their manly pursuits. Mr. Anderson, might I also recommend adding one or more of the following to your ManHands line of soaps: Cigar; Taco Bell; Sriracha (complete with dares to use it in the shower scribed on the packaging); Blood & Sweat (no tears; tears are for girls); and Halle Berry.

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