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AT-AT Dress

By: on March 26, 2013
  • AT-AT Dress
  • AT-AT Dress

Whenever someone compliments a girl's article of clothing, as in, "That's a nice dress," my friend Kristen always pipes up, "Is it the dress or the girl in the dress?" Touche, Kristen. Typically it is the girl in the dress. Typically if I go so far as to say anything to a girl about her dress I can't tell you a thing about what the dress looks like, even as I'm staring at it. However, were a girl wearing this AT-AT body-hugging tube of splenditude I might actually notice her dress second, right after her boobs, instead of...uh...never.

Polyester and Lycra, my favorite women's fashion duo, join forces to introduce Star Wars' iconic assault vehicles to the world of minidresses. Where most fabrics awash in repeating designs opt for ducks or sailboats or hearts, the always innovative, always keeping men in mind even while fabricating ladies' wear clothier, Black Milk, has gone for a torso-and-trunk full of AT-ATs. Once again, a galaxy (far, far away) of thanks, Black Milk.

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Sexy TRON Outfit

Discontinued

Wise shoppers know that when buying a gift, you should choose something for the recipient that you would never choose to buy for yourself. In that vein, this smokin' hot, 12-gauge clear plastic TRON corset lined with...

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Luke Skywalker's Landspeeder

$499.99 from Radio Flyer »

My Episode IV A New Hope is that Luke Skywalker's Landspeeder hears the collective wail of all adult Star Wars fans and comes out with pre-order information for a second model of the replica X-34. One that supports weights...

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Stormtrooper Whiskey Decanter & Shot Glass

$14.61 - $26.79 from The Fowndry »

A stormtrooper who's packing nothing but Jameson and a Buttery Nipple is my kind of stormtrooper. I bet in whiskey decanter and suspended glass forms they're even a decent shot. At least until round 7 or 8 when your own...

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Star Wars Adult Onesies

$64.45 from Amazon »

Star Wars onesies for adults are what's called being comfortably chic on Halloween, and F'ing awesome the other 364 days of the year. Boba Fett, R2-D2, a stormtrooper, and the grandaddy of being the worst daddy of all...

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Rogue From X-Men Costume

Discontinued

It's The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants' most famous defector in living, non-Anna-Paquin form! This milliskin Rogue jumpsuit is made to order in your choice of kotobukiya with green details, classic with black details, and...

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Millennium Falcon Asteroid Coffee Table

$6,499 from Regal Robot »

The only thing this Millennium Falcon Asteroid Coffee Table is missing is my feet. As Han Solo and Chewie expertly maneuver their ship through an asteroid field to evade Vader and his fleet, I relax with a Bud Light Lime...

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Python Skin Death Trooper Helmet

$3k from ELEMNT »

I think this python skin Death Trooper Helmet solidifies maker ELEMNT's position on Team Dark Side. Their first snaked-out Star Wars replica payed homage to Darth Vader, and was shaped around one of the 1,200 collector's...

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The Darth Knight

$1,500 from Ebay »

You love Batman, but you're a loyal Star Wars fanboy. Halloween is coming up and you have a difficult decision to make. Can you betray Darth Vader for your new crush on the Dark Knight? Good news. You won't have to. Mash...

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Star Wars Pipes

$55 - $69 from Etsy »

One good way to bring the Dark Side and the Light Side together is to get them all stoned. What, we're fighting? I'm trying to eradicate you from the galaxy? OK, well...why don't we order some deep dish pizzas...and a...

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Boba Fett Motorcycle Helmet

Unlike a few selections in this slideshow of sick motorcycle helmets, you can probably wear HJC's new RPHA 11 Boba Fett helmet without getting laughed off the road (it's an obvious, but not over-the-top Star Wars circus...

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The Force Awakens First Order Stormtrooper Helmet

$200 from Anovos »

The good news is this is the first ever Standard Line version of a Star Wars: The Force Awakens First Order Stormtrooper Helmet, and you can have one for $200 ($249.95 if you wait until October 1 to order). That bad news...

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Rebel Bass Guitar

$945 - $1,325 from Doni Guitars »

No longer must you search the galaxy to find this Rebel Bass, but you will have to wait at least 3 months to get it. Last Fall, after photos of his custom Star Wars guitars had gone viral online, Englishman Doni opened...