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Self-Defense Coin Bag

Posted: March 06, 2019
Self-Defense Coin Bag
$39.99
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George Washington, Franklin Roosevelt, Thomas Jefferson, and Abe Lincoln team up to deliver the ultimate bitch slap, packing a whack! from inside your self-defense coin bag. And after they're done, you'll be all ready to give the poor sapped sap whining about it on the ground a quarter to call someone who cares.

You stylish self-defending diva, you.

Nah, wearing the self-defense coin bag isn't up there with wearing a fanny pack in the Dude, WTF is on your waist?! department. The pouch is made of distressed leather and affixes to a belt, folding over and snapping in place pretty inconspicuously.

The main issue I have with a coin-filled leather slapper is the coin part. Who looks for ways to schlep around a wad of change anymore? I hardly even carry paper money, but heavy ass metal nickels and dimes that take 15 minutes to root through for the right amount when it's time to pay the lady for my mixed nuts, incontinence pills, and Doublemint gum at the drug store? No thank you.

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