A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Friday, August 19, 2011
$19.95 million from Yahoo »

Do you have $20 mil burning a hole in your shorts? It's worth less every second as we watch the financial world crumble beneath us. And you know what they say, "buy land, God ain't makin' any more of it". Well, we've brought...

Monday, September 24, 2012
$5.99 from Amazon »

If you can resign yourself to wearing a face (or body) full of lime green makeup when the boring yellow lights are on, get ready to blow minds when the sexy black ones take over. Fluorescing in brilliant neon hues under UV...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
$5.77 from Amazon »

It's a well known fact that placing a cold slab of meat over the source of your boo boos helps with the healing process. Get these, keep them in the freezer, and slab them over your paper cuts, scrapes, burns and bullet wounds you weenies....

Sunday, October 9, 2011
Discontinued

I like my poison with coffee and cream. But, a pint of Guinness will do as well. And I think it's incredibly polite to notify me that I've been poisoned after, so I really appreciate the frankness the bottom of this pint glass...

Bar
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Sold Out from Amazon »

These make jello shots a lot simpler I guess. Slam the shot, eat the glass. In Australia, their version of lick it, suck it, slam it instead goes... squirt it, slam it, snort it. First, you squirt lemon juice in your eye...

Tuesday, January 22, 2013
$8.21 from Amazon »

Too bad no one thought of this Dine Ink Pen Utensil Set 20 years ago when people still used pens to perform office tasks. Also too bad no one thought to name them Bite 'N' Write, which is far more memorable, clever, and likely to appeal to the utensils' only viable share of the market. You know, bad poets....

Tuesday, October 4, 2011
$15 from Amazon »

Who can pass up a perfect opportunity to ruin your dog's entire day at the expense of comedy? In an ironic twist, we find our beloved mailman atop our canine in this Gulliver's Travels-esque Halloween costume. Kind of funny....

Saturday, August 4, 2012
$179.99 from Metawatch »

Smartphones already allow us to wield technological power that would make my grandma's head spin right off her neck (may she rest in peace*) and iPhones and Androids indeed place the world at our fingertips. But what happens...

Saturday, June 30, 2012
$849 from Open ROV »

Admittedly, when I saw the OpenROV, an underwater exploratory robot intended for both professional and personal use, my first thought was the iPhone I lost to an all-day booze fest on Lake Geneva. She was a mere 3 days old....

Friday, September 9, 2011

Great DIY project idea to turn your boring cobweb speckled gas tank into a piece of artwork. This doesn't even look too difficult. Even I might be able to get this done. I'm not going to, but knowing I could makes me feel...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013
$11.59 from Amazon »

I don't know if the Perfect Pancake Pan really cooks perfect pancakes as advertised, but if it does I would like to eat 8 of its delectably fluffy jack-flappers right now. Sumbitches look gooood....

Saturday, December 8, 2012
$10.79 from Amazon »

Perfectly spherical globes of meat absorbing the smoke and slight char of a grill without cooking unevenly or coming out looking all catawampus. On earth, it cannot exist. This must be what awaits me, along with circa 1988...

Wednesday, November 14, 2012
$39.99 from GetWineOnline.com »

Medea Vodka is proof (80 proof, to be more specific) once again that what's on the inside really doesn't count. Because even if the liquor's crap, who doesn't want a vodka bottle with a programmable, running LED marquee to...

Monday, August 19, 2013
$18.95 from Amazon »

Sorry, baby owners, you still have to pack up 40 pounds of luggage prior to each and every trip to the park. But you, dog owners, have just been given the gift of consolidation. Paww's ThrowBowl fuses flying disc with water...

Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Discontinued

Do you trust your girlfriend or wife? Implicitly? If you're going to let her own these, then you damn well better because she could slice your fat face up real nice and quick with these bad boys. OR she could give you a very...

Wednesday, October 10, 2012
By: Flickr

From entirely new LEGO parts, Benjamin of Brickplace Custom has crafted this ornate 17.7" x 17.7" Star Wars chess set pitting the Rebel Alliance against the Empire on the ice planet Hoth. Though a few comments on his Flickr...

Bar
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
$29.48 from Amazon »

I have to admit, I don't watch Dexter. But, I know he's a serial killer by day and a funeral home director by night. Wait... maybe I have that reversed and confused. It's Michael Anthony Hall at least right? Wait... Uh, maybe...

Tuesday, February 5, 2013
$41 from Art Lebedev »

The Greeks--or whatever foreign-tongued group of cats who created this optical illusion doormat--sure don't cut any corners when it comes to making up a fancy way to say "box". But the Parallelepipedus Kovrikus makes up for...

Thursday, June 14, 2012
$12 from Etsy »

If you can read this I will lick you. A simple metal disk turns dog collar banality into dog collar hilarity. But how many people take the time to rifle through a dog's tags in search of potential witticisms? I think this...

Sunday, June 10, 2012
$150 from Etsy »

Looking for an undead-slaying wedding cake topper? How about an ass-kicking Mini Me? Jessica of Etsy's Jess' Shop customizes zombie and vampire hunter figurines with buyers' own faces and clothing specifications to inject...

Saturday, August 18, 2012
$169 from Tokyo Flash »

One thing I'll say for Tokyo Flash is their line of hi-tech, space-agey watches never runs the risk of going stale. New releases debut regularly, and always with a notable twist or tweak to existing flavors of timetelling...

Sunday, August 5, 2012

The street legal version is cool and all, but for the musicians out there, how about a 6-string Light Cycle blasting a blue inferno as it travels at the speed of sound? The Cybertech T-RON, another stunning piece of hand-forged...

Wednesday, June 27, 2012
$34.50 from Amazon »

Kick ass in the image of MMA Heavyweight Champ Andrei Arlovski, NBA Champ LeBron James, or Blood-Draining Champ Dracula. TITLE's Fang Mouthguard is made from PolyShok, a material they claim has 150% more energy absorbency...

Thursday, September 8, 2011
$12.50 from Blast Caffeine »

This stuff is scary. It takes 125 energy drinks to match the caffeine in 1 Blast caffeine. So, if you're finally ready to get off the couch and go outside, this stuff might help. Or, it might kill you. Either way, it's gonna...

Sunday, October 28, 2012
$38 from Amazon »

The Leaf says Hasta luego to both cable company BS and the eyesore attributes of other network TV HD antennas on the market. Its paper thin design and reversible black/white coloration allow for easy and inconspicuous mounting...

Monday, December 17, 2012
$79.99 from Amazon »

Wrap your iPad in a BookBook leather case and look studious and respectable while using it, even if all you're doing is skimming Fantasy Football stats and online shopping for a pair of Fundies. The BookBook, a hard case for...

Wednesday, October 3, 2012
$27 from Casttoo »

If you're stuck in a cast, may as well milk the sympathies of the world by showing it what the plaster is covering. Casttoo's Bone Tattoos for the cast-ridden come in a range of styles*, from straight subsurface skeletal structure...

Friday, June 22, 2012
$45 from blik »

8-bit space hasn't just not faded into oblivion, it's been supersized and packaged into decal sets of 65 for constant stimulation as floor-to-ceiling wall decor. Blik's movable and reusable wall decals, based on classic Atari...

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Planning to ring in 2013 with a dissociative fugue wherein you assume the life of a JRR Tolkien character? Hey, me too! I'm going with Thorin Oakenshield, King Under the Mountain. I've already booked my ticket to New Zealand...

Wednesday, September 19, 2012
$163 from Oree Design »

Using the word "slab" to describe something as elegant as these solid wood keyboards seems a little unflattering, but they are indeed QWERTY masterpieces carved from a single slab of either maple or walnut. Designer Oree takes...

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

This is the gas-powered vehicle that combines the thrill of riding a snowmobile and the freedom of a snowboard, enabling you to surf effortlessly over the deepest fresh powder or on packed, granular snow....

Saturday, December 31, 2011
$49.50 from Powerstick »

The Powerstick is an amazing portable charger for mobile devices such as phones, iPods, iPads, digital cameras, GPS and MP3 Players. Simply recharge it from any USB port including computers and laptops and then use it to charge...

Tuesday, March 26, 2013
$390 from Etsy »

Hmmm, which contributes more to my general state of dumbstruck: the giant grizzly bear hide or the couch it's sitting on? Whomever bought that couch must have had to travel back to 1974 to get it. I didn't realize the visual...

Saturday, December 17, 2011
$6.80 from Amazon »

The marketing photos for this vampacifier aren't that impressive. They make it look like a good idea that was poorly executed. Kind of like the entire Twilight book series. Or the WTF-looking children of Bruce Willis and Demi...

Thursday, September 22, 2011

A King Kong inspired home theater setup from Tom Spina Designs. The same geniuses that brought you the Avenger's Desk have an amazing imagination so you don't have to. Great job guys....

Saturday, August 10, 2013
$49 - $100 from Amazon »

Oh holy arachnid! I'm not going to need a set of Samurai sword kitchen knives to exact retribution on that SOB onion, I'm going to need them to save myself from the Alessi Juicy Salif citrus-squeezing alien! And by "citrus-squeezing"...

Saturday, September 3, 2011
$25 from Etsy »

Tiny, intricate and detailed. How someone has the patience to do this, I don't know. You have to have very small, steady hands to get into this kind of work I'd imagine. Maybe it's the same person who did this nano origami....

Monday, September 30, 2013
$19.49 from Amazon »

This digital spoon scale enables measurement by weight as well as measurement by volume. That means in addition to knowing from a caloric standpoint how many pounds I'll gain over time when I transport tablespoonfuls of Nutella...

Monday, August 29, 2011
$11.89 from Amazon »

The future is here. These amazing miracle berries are eaten before meals to make the meals taste better. "How?" you ask. By making sour and bitter foods taste sweet. I have tried these and they do work. Don't believe me? Take...

Wednesday, August 10, 2011
$36.95 from Amazon »

Do you lose your keys like some kind of retard all of the time? Do you have a nagging wife that you can't get rid of? Then this is the perfect item for you. Also makes a good housewarming gift....

Saturday, April 21, 2012

If you've been looking for a cross-eyed ninja to tell you what time it is, well...you're still out of luck. But getting one step closer with industrial designer Andy Kurovets' concept watch Ninja Time. Its slip-on molded plastic...

Monday, June 25, 2012
$19.95 from Sur La Table »

In my pursuit to acquire devices that allow me to think and reason even less than I already do, I discovered the Steak Button. A set of 4 thermometers designed specifically for beef on the grill or in the oven, Steak Buttons...

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Americans = retards when it comes to geography.... and spelling. Come to think of it, we don't excel at much of anything these days. This map hopes to solve at least the first two problems, as well as adding a touch of style...

Sunday, May 27, 2012
$19.77 from Amazon »

Replete with an endorsement and foreword by George R. R. Martin, the definitive Game of Thrones cookbook, A Feast of Ice and Fire, begins shipping on May 29, 2012. Pre-orders are currently available for recipes replicating...

Thursday, February 21, 2013
$260 from Etsy »

Those talks of collaboration? Beaker and Martha Stewart have finally hooked it up. Test Tube chandeliers satisfy the overhead lighting needs of science geeks and prima donnas alike with their authentic glass chem lab cylinders...

Saturday, October 6, 2012
Discontinued

Maybe the wise old steampunk MechOwlies can tell me why. Tell me why ain't nothin' but a heartache. Tell me why ain't nothin' but a mistake. Tell me why I never wanna hear you say I want it that way. Or at least whether or...

Thursday, March 14, 2013
$6.49 - $87.99 from Half Time »

Ruckus Brewing's Hoptimus Prime enjoys a wicked twist of irony: instead of transforming those who drink it into sage and powerful leaders of an elite race of impenetrable robots, at 9.0% ABV the double IPA reduces them to...

Tuesday, April 3, 2012
$35 from Shitter »

People talk a lot of shit on Twitter. So it was really only a matter of time before the maestros at Collector's Edition fabricated Shitter Toilet Paper, and bestowed the shit talkers with a viable way to put their money--and...

Sunday, April 7, 2013
$14 from Amazon »

First of all, I am in no mood for cutesy plays on words this morning so Doorganizer, minus one point. Second, the main thing about organization tools that help you not forget stuff is that you have to remember to use them....

Saturday, June 23, 2012
$18.99 - $29.95 from Amazon »

I've been wondering would there ever be a way, when I'm extracting sand and the salty ocean from my crevices, or toweling off after a shower, that I could feel as if I'm traipsing through the Scottish Highlands, communing...

Monday, August 15, 2011

So, you paint your walls with this stuff and it basically turns your house into a giant whiteboard. Then you can write all of your crappy ideas that you'll never follow through on all over your house. And, you could draw stick...

Thursday, August 18, 2011
$150 from A+R Store »

The future is here. Unlike those pedestrian technical toys that require "feeding," the Domsai is high design and beautiful and actually requires a bit of water and sunlight. But you can leave them unattended for long periods...

Thursday, December 13, 2012
$11.29 from Firebox.com »

Hot to the power of hot meets one of the most devastating allergens on the planet. If Instant Regret Peanut Butter doesn't drive you into an immediate convulsive fit, followed by a semi-conscious state of catatonia, Firebox...

Saturday, March 31, 2012
$1,795 from Focus Designs »

To be clear, Version 3 of the Self-Balancing Unicycle (SBU V3) is not only the uncoordinated man's unicycle, it is also the lazy man's unicycle. Riders get out of both using muscular control to balance themselves, and they...

Saturday, October 13, 2012
$13.89 from Amazon »

These aren't just Gummi Army Guys. These are 5 pounds of Gummi Army Guys. If I ate all of them, I would be 5 pounds heavier. Until I projectile vomited faster than the speeding bullets the GIs are ammo'd up with, at which...

Thursday, April 26, 2012
$24.99 from Amazon »

No opposable thumb required. This pooch-friendly water fountain attaches easily to the end of a standard garden hose, and activates at the touch of a paw. Adjustable to 3 pressure settings, the perpetual hydrater is also capable...

Monday, February 13, 2012
$40.70 from Kibardin Design »

Feeling stressed? Anxious? Aggressive? Don't take it out on the nonnative English speaker administering over-the-phone tech support, take it out on Ge!, Ni!, Ho!, and Poo! Cao Marus are smooshy Japanese stress relievers with...

Sunday, May 19, 2013
Discontinued

Pending successful Kickstarter funding and production, tim-E--pronounced "Timmy" or, if you're Trey Parker and Matt Stone, "Timmehhh!"--might prove to be the most charming and useful ass-shakin' robot in the land. Designed...

Saturday, June 2, 2012
$17.08 from Amazon »

A revised edition of the 1996 original, the Aliens: Colonial Marines Technical Manual saw its re-release on May 29, 2012, just in time for Ridley Scott's forthcoming--and, uh, entirely unrelated--Prometheus big screen debut....

Saturday, August 25, 2012
$39.95 from NeatoShop.com »

While I'll probably just use my Zombie Survival Kit Messenger Bag to carry, like, books and Funyuns, I'm hoping that when the actual Zombie Apocalypse hits, nests of walking dead that are considering chasing me down to eat...

Thursday, August 11, 2011
$330 from Amazon »

For what you're getting here, the price cannot be beat. These are solid, easily adjustable and very easy to use. Ranging from 5 to 45 pounds look no further for your entire home gym needs than these dumbbells....

Thursday, October 6, 2011

He's lived a long and fruitful life. He's been up your kid's nose and in your dog's mouth. He spent a summer between the couch cushions in the basement. You found him one day on top of the defunct radiator in a failed suicide...

Wednesday, September 12, 2012
$325 from Opulent Items »

Winter is coming. And when the temperatures drop below freezing, and the snow and ice and dragons and White Walkers storm your abode, it's important to be a good host. To welcome them with some Ice 'N' Go backyard hockey rink...

Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Citizens first met the Wheel of Death when the spinning, human-laced target debuted in 1938, and 75 years later, it still represents an exhilarating feat of precision and certainty whose use is likely to get at least one person...

Wednesday, August 15, 2012
$14.95 from Amazon »

Glass, xenon, ABS plastic, and visible electric current swoop in to prevent the groggy and inebriated from stubbing it, stepping on it, colliding with it, and biting it in the dark. Or at least slightly reduce the odds. MoMa's...

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

How many plants have you accidentally sent to their death? The concept of dumping water in dirt seems like an easy one to master, but the recipients can be so finicky. Some want lots to drink, some just a sip; some guzzle...

Sunday, February 12, 2012
$79.99 from Twelve South »

HoverBar is a simple, adjustable arm with an L-shaped stand that dangles iPad 2s alongside their Apple Obi-Wan counterparts, giving users easy access to a supplemental, touchscreen computer, and creating the ultimate futurist...

Thursday, January 12, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Part mercenary weapon, part magnetic field holder for your grocery list, these high quality magnets will hold up to a sheets of paper firmly against your refrigerator or any other metallic surface. Most crappy fridge magnets...