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Rent-A-Goat - Invasive Plant Remediation

By: on January 05, 2016
$250
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Amazon offers Home Services now. You enter your zip code and request a quote and you can get a plumber, an electrician, someone to set up your media center so you don't have to throw it out the window. But the only person really worth hiring from Amazon Home Services is the guy who brings you goats: the Rent-A-Goat Man.

If you've ever seen a goat in action, or tasted something a goat in action has produced, you probably know that those crazy Bovidae will eat anything. Blackberry brambles, poison ivy, tin cans. Where Amazon (unbelievably, but then again maybe not) comes in is that if you are personally dealing with a yard, or a couple of acres, full of unwanted vegetation they will send you some goats in action. Plus a goat pro to consult on and oversee the process.

Rent-A-Goat services may not be available in all areas, but if you can get it in yours, you'll receive an assessment of your problem plants and overgrowth, a goat grazing plan and estimate, and however many loaner goats the Goat Man thinks you'll need to down the delicious meal. The Goat Man will also place temporary fencing around the goats, and return periodically to check on their progress. The service also notes that as the goats graze, "they will likely leave behind some droppings, too, and you'll get to keep this fertilizer as a friendly parting gift!"

Some examples of vegetation goats will mow down on include thistle, English Ivy, kudzu, poison sumac, poison oak, wisteria, and various grasses. They are preferable to machines because they can access areas the former typically cannot, preferable to human hands because that kind of manual labor su-hucks, and preferable to herbicides because they have no harmful impact on waterways, soils, animals, and plants you don't want to kill.

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BioVessel Living Countertop Composter

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Worms in your food, infesting your kitchen - it's not such a bad thing when contained in the BioVessel. Dump your food scraps into this countertop-sized composter and the worm colony living inside will eat them up, poop...

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Greenworks 145 MPH Cordless Leaf Blower

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Raking leaves blows. So you blow harder with Greenworks' 145MPH Pro 80V Li-Ion MAX leaf blower, a cordless cleanup tool whose brushless motor and turbo button can stir up and knock around yard debris 580 CFM at 145 MPH....

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Icky Stick Smooth Smoking Hand Pipe

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I don't like the Icky Stick just because I get a kick out of its branding schtick. I mean, that's the biggest reason, but so too am I interested in this hand pipe's claim that it has been "specially designed to provide...

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420 Science breaks it out only once a year, so if a 14" long, 8-bowled glass Grav Labs Menorah bong is what you've been foregoing 20 sacks and Gordita Supremes for since May, here's your chance to turn your pipe dream...

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My favorite part of 7pipe's Twisty Glass Blunt video is the shot of a lady taking a hit off one and then blowing out birthday candles. Good stuff in, bad stuff out, and now we eat cake!...

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The Frost Pipe - DIY a Pipe from Ice

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This Frost Pipe isn't made of no corn cob, and it's not for kiddies building snowmen (or kiddies at all.) This Frost Pipe is a 3-piece freezer mold that lets you DIY your own pipe out of ice. What the Ice Luge is to drinkers...

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Wake 'n' Bake Coffee Mug

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There are a ton of these wake 'n' bake mugs out there, but I went with the delightful navy blue one you see here because its marketing is genius. Coffee or tea alongside my morning tokes? Pssshhh, F that. Fill that pipe...

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Tertill Solar-Powered Weeding Robot

It's a weeding robot, not a weed robot, but the Tertill gets just as many props for helping out with the most tedious of yard work as it would for...what would a weed robot do, anyway? Roll joints and pack bowls? Turn...

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Xtend & Climb Telescoping Ladder

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Leaf Plug N' Plant Cannabis Grow System

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Marijuana is legal where I live (i.e., my bedroom) so why shouldn't I don my farmer's hat and experiment with growing my own? Especially now that sweet cannabis culinary gadgets like the Magical Butter and smart growing...

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Rolet Triple Barrel Pipe

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Rolet (roll-ay, like Nube and ole!) is the triple barrel shotgun for pacifists. Really. It loads. It fires. It smokes. And I'd argue that using it will make you feel way better for way longer than shooting something....