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Cement Penis Garden Statue (NSFW)

Posted: March 08, 2021
Cement Penis Garden Statue (NSFW)
$118.50
from
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The Cement Penis Garden Statue is real. It's spectacular. And, at 16" long, it's porn-star-size. Which I guess is bad news if you were hoping to make a truly gargantuan, say, 6' long dick your newest garden statue, along with your latest attempt to convince the neighbors to keep their kids out of your yard. Try Googling, "Titan Penis Yard Art" for that.

But a 16" long (and 8" wide! and 6" deep!) Cement Penis Garden Statue is perfect for those who want to add just a touch of cock to their flower beds, front entry planters, or garden gnome colony.

Oh whoa! I just noticed the Cement Penis Garden Statue has a sturdy base made not only of testicles, but of human legs! Human legs that are definitely not proportionate to the size of the penis. Forget porn stars and titans, this is the penis of a fertility god. A penis that won't just spruce up your yard, but also spread its seed and bless you with a summer's bounty like never before. Sure, it might be a bounty that consists only of eggplants...even if you didn't plant eggplants...but still....

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