ACME Crates

By: on July 17, 2016
Acme Crates
$150 - $495
Check It Out

I know ACME Crates look like ammo cans filled with manly items of EDC and EDB (Everyday Battle!) but what they really are is...no, wait. That's exactly what they are. ACME Crates are curated collections of tools you might need to conquer your day. Especially when your day picks up a spontaneous round of hand-to-hand combat.

ACME's "crates" themselves consist of repurposed .50 cal ammo cans that come padlocked with a 3-digit combo of your choosing. With the exception of the DOOM Crate you see above. That bad daddy comes in a Czech 10 vz58 crate. And what's inside? Thousands of years' and six continents' worth of, according to ACME, "the greatest weapons from history." Specifically that means:

  • An unbreakable composite baseball bat
  • A grappling hook and rope
  • A war club with blunt steel spike
  • A mace with 3 steel balls
  • A spied tire thumper
  • A genuine leather bullwhip
  • A 13" kukri
  • A pair of ninja swords with double sheath
  • A Vietnamese-style tomahawk
  • A set of screw-shut nunchucks
  • A 2-handed machete (chopping balanced, of course)
  • A double-bit throwing axe

Hey, I'm right there with you. So drool on, dudes. Drool on.

Or click through to the ACME Crate website and get a piece of DOOM for yourself. The company has also put together 3 more, slightly (but only slightly) less testosterone-injected, -marinated, and -dry-rubbed crates to choose from. BRASS, BLACK, and SILVER contain stylized items such as pocket knives, money clips, keychains, pens, and bottle openers. Oooh, I even see some SPF15 Balmshot Chapstick in there.