147

Door Stop Alarm

By: on September 22, 2013
$10.99
Check It Out

This 120 dB door stop alarm could be good for traveling I guess, but if all the mean-spirited friends and family members I know figured out I was using one to protect my bedroom from their snooping eyes and fingers, I can guarantee someone would trip it at least twice a week, and probably multiple times on weekends, just to be a jackass who shatters the peaceful slumber of an angel who cannot function without 10 to 14 hours of sleep per night. The alarm has an adjustable sensitivity switch so that the cat or my mama, who is always polite and knocks...albeit a little too forcefully for my tastes...won't set it off.

Check it out

SALT Self-Defense Gun

$299.99 - $349.99 from Salt Supply »

Lorenzo Maggiore already figured out how to A-Salt bugs in an effort keep our extermination of insects simple, clean, and green. Now we have a means of SALTing humans, this time in an effort to keep our defense against...

Buy Now

Little Rooster Alarm Clock Vibrator

$99 from Amazon »

Oh (face) no, the rooster's crowing (buzzing) already?! Come (yes, please) on! Do I really have to get up (off)? I hear you, ladies. It's a brutal world of mornings, alarms, and orgasms we live in. I'll keep my fingers...

Check it out

Vibrating Ring Alarm Clock

Ring is a vibrating alarm clock that fits over the finger to gently and noiselessly rip slumberers from their states of peace. It is ideal for couples, the hearing impaired, and people who associate the sound of their...

Buy Now

Go Guarded Self Defense Ring

$15.99 from Amazon »

I bought my girlfriend, She-Ra: Princess of Power, a purple Brutus the Bulldog keychain to serve as her attacker ass-kicking assistant, but I'll admit when it arrived, it turned out to be a lot bigger and clunkier that...

Buy Now

Sting Ring

$22.95 from Amazon »

Who wants a fist bump? The Sting Ring is the newest beast in my menagerie of self defense tools. My digital menagerie. I don't own one of the single finger knuckle dusters, and I have no idea how effectively its 18,000,000...

Check it out

ZBand Silent Alarm Clock

$59.99 from Zband »

The Vibrating Ring Alarm Clock may still exist only in concept, but the ZBand, a vibrating bracelet alarm clock, is just a few steps away from silently and unobnoxiously rocking you awake without disturbing significant...

Check it out

Bike Mine Exploding Anti-Theft Alarm

$71 from Kickstarter »

Bike Mine is a thing that makes you go boommm! At least if you're a dirty thief trying to make off with a dude's bicycle or motorcycle (or boat or jet ski if you live the kind of high rollin' life where that's a risk.)...

Check it out

You Snooze You Lose Cash Alarm Clock

$39.99 from ThinkGeek »

In a nutshell--so you can start cookin' up how you're going to use the SnuzNLuz or who you're going to give it to without further ado--what you see here is an alarm clock that connects to your online bank account via...

Buy Now

The Crook-Catcher Deluxe Thief Detection Kit

$59.99 from Amazon »

Stapler, sodie, and steak sandwich stealers of my office (and the world!) beware. You have been marked. And I promise, with my keen detective skills and 9-LED UV flashlight, I. Will. Find you....

Check it out

The Barisieur Coffee Brewing Alarm Clock

Josh Renouf knows what the world really needs: coffee. Stat. Like, the second it opens its eyes. And it needs it served from The Barisieur, an alarm clock topped with implements from Beaker's lab. Very nice, Mr. Renouf....

Check it out

The Fortress Luxury Safe

$128,800 from Doettling »

I sure hope German safe manufacturer Doettling's Fortress lives up to its "safest luxury safe in the world" claims because there's no way any owner of one is going to be able to keep it hidden, discreet, or installed...

Buy Now

Laser Tripwire

Sold Out from Amazon »

If you just want people to keep the F out, get an Add-a-Lock. But if you want them to believe for a split second that they have successfully encroached your space, only to disrupt the blaze of an invisble light that in...